Message Boards

Topic : 07/18 Fatal Attraction?

Number of Replies: 171
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, January 26, 2007, 01:51:56 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 01/29/07) Everyone wants to be loved, but what happens when being the object of someone's affection turns creepy or even fatal? Celebrities are not the only targets – stalkers can be found in any neighborhood and town. Michelle says her ex-boyfriend, Melvin, is obsessed with her, and she fears for her life. Melvin admits he constantly thinks about Michelle and can't live without her in his life, but he says he gets mixed messages from her. Find out the extremes Melvin has gone to in his relationship with Michelle, and why his actions prevented him from coming to Los Angeles for the taping of the show. And, why does Dr. Phil tell Michelle she's playing with fire? Then, Katrina has been infatuated with rap star, Jay-Z, for the last three years. She sends him 200 e-mails a day, has called him over 300 times and has even tried to befriend his best friend and sister. She is convinced that if Jay-Z met her, he would want to be with her, but is she willing to risk jail time just to get close to him? And, meet a Hollywood actress who was stalked on the big screen … and then in real life. Why does she fear her stalker may strike again? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

More July 2007 Show Boards.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

January 29, 2007, 2:11 pm CST

I've been in this situation.

When I was dating my ex hubby, I thought that the jealousies and stalking meant that he loved me and just wanted to protect me. Then we got married and the more confining he was the more I understood it wasn't love but control. I know what this girl is going through, she wants to leave but is afraid. For herself and for her kids. Sometimes it's easier to give them what they want then live in the constant fear. When my ex was happy everything went smoother. So, if I just let him in for awhile, the barrage of phone calls would stop, and he would let out the reigns a little. Then something would happen and he would either push me/grab me or he would cheat. And I would kick him out for awhile and he would be contrite for awhile. Then when he thought  I had enough time to forgive him, then the stalking would begin. It took me 6 yrs to realize that I could stand up to him. And even after the divorce he threatened to kill me, but I wised up. Called the cops, though they didn't do a dang thing for me. Then I called a domestic abuse hotline, and they helped me get a restraining order and I moved on w/ my life. She has to realize that she is worth more than that before she is ready to move on. They take your self-esteem so that you won't leave them, and that's when you start to believe the things they tell you about yourself.
 
January 29, 2007, 2:15 pm CST

fatal attraction

A couple of years ago, my former boss was killed by a mentally ill man who was stalking him.  It had not been going on very long, and as far as my boss  knew, everything was fine.  The man had begun to hear voices and ended up killing several people and injuring others.  He would have killed more people, if a policeman had not killed him.  The entire episode was recorded on videotape, in front of a crowd of people.  It was horrifying, and has put a hole in our community that will never be filled.  I can't even imagine what his family has gone through.  It is very easy for people to fall into a pattern of behavior of this nature, because of the isolation that we experience in our society.  If you feel like you even have tendencies toward this, please watch yourself, and get some help.  Before you know it, this can spiral out of control so fast that it will make your head swim.  And it's not the first person from our state that this is happened to.  Please be well and make good choices. 
 
January 29, 2007, 2:29 pm CST

GET A CLUE !!

I cannot believe this woman.. MICHELLE.. get a clue.. to make this short and simple.. i had a friend whose husband treated her the same way... now when I want to visit her... I go to the cemetary.  GET A CLUE MICHELLE !!
 
January 29, 2007, 2:37 pm CST

01/29 Fatal Attraction?

Michelle is sending mixed messages.  She gets turned on by his abuse and hitting.  Michelle needs help more than he does.  Also the children are innocent victims watching Mommy get beaten, being called horrible names and being treated like crap by Dad.

 

Michelle, get the help you need and stay away from this man.  No offense, but as far as the sex being so great with your abuser, you're better off getting something with batteries... before this creep puts another assault and battery on you.

 

Pearlhanna

 
January 29, 2007, 3:00 pm CST

01/29 Fatal Attraction?

Quote From: ksueditz

When I was dating my ex hubby, I thought that the jealousies and stalking meant that he loved me and just wanted to protect me. Then we got married and the more confining he was the more I understood it wasn't love but control. I know what this girl is going through, she wants to leave but is afraid. For herself and for her kids. Sometimes it's easier to give them what they want then live in the constant fear. When my ex was happy everything went smoother. So, if I just let him in for awhile, the barrage of phone calls would stop, and he would let out the reigns a little. Then something would happen and he would either push me/grab me or he would cheat. And I would kick him out for awhile and he would be contrite for awhile. Then when he thought  I had enough time to forgive him, then the stalking would begin. It took me 6 yrs to realize that I could stand up to him. And even after the divorce he threatened to kill me, but I wised up. Called the cops, though they didn't do a dang thing for me. Then I called a domestic abuse hotline, and they helped me get a restraining order and I moved on w/ my life. She has to realize that she is worth more than that before she is ready to move on. They take your self-esteem so that you won't leave them, and that's when you start to believe the things they tell you about yourself.
I understand what Michelle is going through and what you went through. I am in a 4 year relationship that is going no where. He is controlling, cheats on me, manipulated me, uses me financially and has physically dominated me. When I tell him to leave he says, "Stop being rediculous!" He just won't go, and after a while I have just resolved that I can't get rid of him. He cheated for the last time about 8 months ago, and I thought I had finally had enough, but I am still with him. He pleads with me and will be a total prince when he knows I have had enough and I just take him back. It is exhausting. He says he has changed, but now I am really out of control emotionally because I don't trust him, I am ugly to him because I am so bitter and hurt. I am "psycho" because I am so mistrusting, paranoid, and hurt. But I am still with him. I stopped telling him that I loved him 8 months ago, but he is still here. I will one moment hate his guts and want him out, but a few hours later, I am lying in bed with him lying on his chest, feeling loved. It is hard for me to let go and take the step to get rid of him. I know he loves me, he just made some stupid, selfish choices. It is just sooooo hard to get over his cheating!!!! I want to cheat on him, but I can't be that disrespectful to him. I am afraid my heart will break and I won't be able to deal without him. The sex is great, too.
 
January 29, 2007, 3:02 pm CST

Delusional

I was encouraged to see today's and tomorrows show topics, however, I am very disappointed, at least after today's show with Dr. Phil's diagnosis.  It appears to me that while some of the guests have personality disorders involving stalking behavior, some are suffering from delusional disorder.

 

After two years of unjust accusations, my husband has finally been diagnosed with Jealousy Delusional Disorder.  It took many therapists before finding one that was not afraid to make the diagnosis.

 

I watch Dr. Phil on a regular basis and have a lot of respect for him but he seems to be unwilling to name it for what it really is.

 
January 29, 2007, 3:03 pm CST

Hey Dr. Phil....it's professionally called.....

Dahhhh, It's called Stockholm Syndrom!  A term I should think someone at your level would be familiar with.  I've heard the term from as many as 5 different counsellors reguarding my 10 year marriage.  He's done many similar things to me and all the counsellors said the same thing....get out...just get out...like it should be easy or something.  When you asked why she stays the blank look and tears told you she's not sure herself so to get the bully tough guy routine out doesn't work on her....trust me she's already seen that from her abuser.  Go please and get some professional training on how people can recover from this and I'll be sure to watch That show with much anticipation....
 
January 29, 2007, 3:13 pm CST

help for Michelle

 I do hope that Dr Phil will  offer and get professional help for Michelle...

she is sad and looking for love, attention and affection  that is (was) missing in her life...

 I just wanted to reach out to her and  give her a huge hug.

 

Help her, Dr PHil !!!

 

 

 
January 29, 2007, 3:17 pm CST

01/29 Fatal Attraction?

Quote From: pleasefreeme

Dahhhh, It's called Stockholm Syndrom!  A term I should think someone at your level would be familiar with.  I've heard the term from as many as 5 different counsellors reguarding my 10 year marriage.  He's done many similar things to me and all the counsellors said the same thing....get out...just get out...like it should be easy or something.  When you asked why she stays the blank look and tears told you she's not sure herself so to get the bully tough guy routine out doesn't work on her....trust me she's already seen that from her abuser.  Go please and get some professional training on how people can recover from this and I'll be sure to watch That show with much anticipation....

 

BRAVO !!!!     to you !!!!!

 
January 29, 2007, 3:21 pm CST

01/29 Fatal Attraction?

 I feel bad for Michele.

OBVIOUSLY she is not getting any sort of counseling. She needs to get very specialized domestic violence counseling. Anybody that would continue having sex with an ANIMAL that abused her so horribly is not well. Her whole way of thinking is skewed , which is due to the abuse she has suffered. Yes, it is a dangerous situation that she is in. Because I have been in a similar situation as Michele, I understand why she is still having contact with her abuser.

Until Michele gets into domestic violence counseling, she is going to continue to think she deserves to be treated so horribly. Victims don't stay in abusive relationships because they like being abused. Your whole thought process is totally shot because of the violence, the verbal abuse, the emotional abuse, the lies, and all of the garbage an abuser puts his victim through. Unfortunately, it isn't always over for the victim once the abuser leaves. This is when the real work has to be done. It's hard, it sucks, but you can recover.
NO CONTACT  with the abuser  is a big step in the right direction.


 
First | Prev | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Next | Last