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Topic : 02/02 A Difficult Reunion – Part 2

Number of Replies: 337
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Created on : Friday, January 26, 2007, 02:00:37 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
After 20 years, Erica finally gets the chance to ask her father, Mark, all of the questions that have tormented her for years. Then Dr. Phil comes at the recovering drug-addict with some tough questions of his own. Refusing to let Mark walk away from his daughter after all she's been through, Dr. Phil goes backstage to confront him and convince this belligerent ex-convict to quell his anger and continue the conversation with his adult daughter. Sparks fly among Dr. Phil, Mark, and Erica, but when Erica's older sister, Rachel, and Aunt Denise decide they are also ready to confront Mark, this explosive emotional reunion is something you have to see to believe. Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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January 28, 2007, 4:59 pm CST

What the heck do you mean by that?

Quote From: professor1

 We do not yet have all the necessary knowledge of this case in order to make an intelligent decision.  Perhaps the man did murder his wife but what were the circumstances concerning that murder?  Did he serve his time?   If the daughter wishes to have a relationship with her father and if the father desires the same it would be good to receive the help needed to show forgiveness and try to recover what is left of two lives that have been deeply hurt.  If the daughter cannot forgive it will affect her the rest of her life in a negative way. 
What do you mean "perhaps the man did murder his wife" and "what were the circumstances concerning the murder" ? If you had been watching the show you would know that he DID murder his wife and what the circumstances were. What difference does it make what the "circumstances" were? Murder is murder.
 
January 29, 2007, 5:17 pm CST

02/02 A Difficult Reunion – Part 2

Girl  I would never forgive my father for killing my mother! Thats  bad and you should not even talk to him. he killed your mother!!! Which is so sad! He should still be in jail. If you ask me.
 
January 30, 2007, 8:03 am CST

Thats you

Quote From: angelgirl11

Girl  I would never forgive my father for killing my mother! Thats  bad and you should not even talk to him. he killed your mother!!! Which is so sad! He should still be in jail. If you ask me.
I have forgiven my father for what he has done because i know my mother has and she wants me to do the same so I can  go on with my life and stop letting him controll me. Its not  my place to judge him. And one day when he goes befor the higher power he will do all of the judgeing himself.
 
January 30, 2007, 8:18 am CST

I AGREE

Quote From: rosie52

What do you mean "perhaps the man did murder his wife" and "what were the circumstances concerning the murder" ? If you had been watching the show you would know that he DID murder his wife and what the circumstances were. What difference does it make what the "circumstances" were? Murder is murder.

this is me Erica. i agree with you on the forgiveness part and your the first person on here to support me if i wanted a relastionship. NOW ON THE MURDER PART I DONT CARE WHAT THE REASSON WAS HE COLD BLOODED MURDED MY MOTHER BECAUSE HE WAS CRAZY. SO THATS ALL ANYINE NEEDs TO KNOW ABOUT THAT. But i have came to a point in  my life where i have to forgive. I know my mother has and she would want me to di the same. I leave the judgeing up to the higher power because thats who counts. as for a relationship with my fater i now know thats not good for me. I just cant!!!!!!!!!

 
January 30, 2007, 11:54 am CST

02/02 A Difficult Reunion – Part 2

Dear Erica,

 

I think you're very brave to meet your father after all these years and after what he has done to your mom. Some people cannot understand why you want to do this, but that's not relevant. What's relevant is what you want. I hope you'll get some closure from the confrontation with your father. God bless you!

 

Love,

Luka

 
January 30, 2007, 8:36 pm CST

forgiveness is for you to heal

Quote From: airca23

this is me Erica. i agree with you on the forgiveness part and your the first person on here to support me if i wanted a relastionship. NOW ON THE MURDER PART I DONT CARE WHAT THE REASSON WAS HE COLD BLOODED MURDED MY MOTHER BECAUSE HE WAS CRAZY. SO THATS ALL ANYINE NEEDs TO KNOW ABOUT THAT. But i have came to a point in  my life where i have to forgive. I know my mother has and she would want me to di the same. I leave the judgeing up to the higher power because thats who counts. as for a relationship with my fater i now know thats not good for me. I just cant!!!!!!!!!

Hi Erica!! I must start by telling you how sorry I am to hear about your tragic loss. I too have suffered tragic loss as well. I have an Aunt who also died at the hands of the man she loved. Her 9 and 2 year old daughter, and 1year old son witnessed it. They were also sexually abused by him. He died of brain cancer about 5 years after the asault, he was sentenced to 1year in a mental institute. The kids still suffer today as adults as they struggle through their life with this. I love them dearly. You see Erica the way I see it you can do something and take control of your life pursuing happiness or you can continue to live life as you have. You need to forgive him for yourself so you can close this chapter in your life and heal. You're right this guy is a lunatic, he doesn't deserve your forgiveness. What he does with it is up to him. You my dear, on the other hand need to do this because it's destroying you hating him. Why waste your life on him? Forgive him and get gratification knowing you ARE a better person than him. It doesn't sound like you knew anything but hating him, share this information with your family, look how much stronger you will all be. I don't know if you've ever experienced happiness. Let me see if I can describe it too you, doing better than you expected on a school test but a 10000000000000 x's better. Get it? I know this sounds crazy but you can turn all this into a positive experience. Keep seeking professional help, when your ready, "it'll be like icing on the cake."
 
February 1, 2007, 3:44 pm CST

02/02 A Difficult Reunion – Part 2

you know it says to share your thoughts here about the show! well ill do my very best to put my thoughts down in words that wont offend any one involved, it would seem to me this is not in any way a good way for any one to act in memory of the girls mother, or in the memory of marks deceased wife, its bad enough that drugs and alcohol have taken these girls mother away from them, she cant be replaced by any of this anger and in all honesty would she want every one fighting like cats and dogs now? really that cant be good for any one! mark has a demon he will have to deal with for the rest of his life, nothing any one says or does from this point on will ever come close to the punishment he delivers to him self day after day after day, he cant wake up one day and not think back to that day in time, thats got to be a living hell all in its own, but i do think it would have been better to show a family that was torn apart 20 years ago being put back together today by forgiveness and love would have really made a beautiful way to remember the girls mother. a memorial in her memory would have been a much better show dr phil. that would seem to help all involved to hea;l
 
February 1, 2007, 5:56 pm CST

02/02 A Difficult Reunion – Part 2

Quote From:

i really wasn't being rude to you, but i do know you have no clue of what you speak. had i felt like you want this young woman to feel i would never have gotten to tell my father just how much i really loved him, but i only lost a brother not a mother, well i really lost a brother and a father. the man that came home from prison after 15 years wasn't the same man i knew as a child growing up, he lost his most prized possession, do you know what that is? henolonger had his self worth or respect, but prison didn't take that from him living every day of the rest of his life thinking about what he could have did differently the day he killed my brother took that from him! it didn't make a damn bit of difference to him that i forgave him he still never forgave himself! all that came out of prison was a mer shell of where a man once stood! wanna know what caused all this? damn DRUGS and damn ALCOHOL these are the things that left me with out a brother of father.
 
February 1, 2007, 6:18 pm CST

02/02 A Difficult Reunion – Part 2

erica this probely wont help but i know how it hurts to hear people say bad things about your dad, no matter what happened hes still your father and i know it hurts to hear or read bad things people think! its a shame people cant just be happy for some one going through what your going through, all i would ever try to offer you will be asking god to bestow a special blessing on your entire family, and tell you follow your heart as you have sofar.
 
February 1, 2007, 9:15 pm CST

Good

Quote From: airca23

I have forgiven my father for what he has done because i know my mother has and she wants me to do the same so I can  go on with my life and stop letting him controll me. Its not  my place to judge him. And one day when he goes befor the higher power he will do all of the judgeing himself.

Hi Erica,

 

I'm glad that you have moved on and forgiven him.  He seems like a genuinely nice person - but was messed up at the time.  I know what drugs can do to a person - it can make them so evil.  Now that is no excuse to murder someone and yes what he did was EVIL!  But forgiving is sometimes the best medicine for those who are in pain from a tragic event in their life - and by mending a broken heart, such as yours, by forgiving your father does the trick - then I think that is wonderful!!!  Please - good luck with your future and the possibility of having a relationship with him. 

 

I think him stepping forward was brave.  And you wanting to find him was brave as well.  Good luck

 
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