Message Boards

Topic : 06/15 Biggest Reunions Ever

Number of Replies: 364
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, February 09, 2007, 02:45:44 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 2/16/07) Imagine your weight getting so out of control that it confined you to your home, to a room, even to a bed. Now imagine the isolation you’d feel when you could no longer visit your friends and family, and had to depend on another person for basic needs like food and getting to the bathroom. Cindy, 35, is approximately 500 pounds and completely depends on her 15-year-old daughter, Vikki, for everything. Vikki says because of her mother’s weight, life at home is one big fight, and the only time she had some peace was when Child Welfare removed her for a few weeks. Does Cindy put too many demands on her daughter? Dr. Phil surprises Cindy by reuniting her with her mother, Linda, whom she hasn’t been able to see in eight years. Then, meet a man who has been trapped in his bedroom for over two years. Bob says he hasn’t smelled the outside air in years and has no idea what the real world is like beyond his four bedroom walls. The last time he was able to check his weight, it was 900 pounds. How much does he weigh now? Dr. Phil surprises Bob with a visit from someone who’s become his biggest supporter, a man he speaks with every day but has never met. After seeing doctored photos of their thinner selves, will Cindy and Bob agree to work hard with the resources headed their way? Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

More June 2007 Show Boards.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

February 14, 2007, 9:45 am CST

Message from Bob's Freind

Hello, My name is Russ, and I'm a friend of Bob who is the 900+ pound man on this coming Friday's Feb 16th show. I contacted Bob last summer after reading about him on the internet, and we've been friends ever since. He's a really great guy, but his weight has made his life really, really difficult not to mention full of pain. I contacted many talk shows onhis behalf to try to get them interested in doing a story on Bob, and the only one who got back to me was Dr. Phil's show. I hope people are supportive of Bob when they see the show, and don't judge him because of his size. He really wants to get his life back on track, and he's been working hard ever since the show taped this episode to do just that. I'll talk to Bob today, and let him know that he should try to come to this message board to answer any questions anyone might have for him. cya later Russ
 
February 14, 2007, 11:12 am CST

Can't imagine I would ever allow it!!!!

The message board  intro  requests:

Imagine your weight getting so out of control that it confines you to your home, to a room, even to a bed.

One problem with that request is I simply cannot imagine how any person of normal intelligence (and lacking any pre-existing invalid condition) could allow themselves to get THAT obese.  Being overweight is uncomfortable;  I can't see how they don't draw the line and make changes at a lower weight.  Food is nice, but it isn't nice enough to feel that bad.

I like to eat,  and I crave french macarons to the point of pain.   I just don't give in.

I've been heavy,  and had begun to suffer health consequences of that.   I drew the line myself  when my BMI hit the first part of the obesity range,  simply because I couldn't stand the way it felt.  How does anyone decide to stop living and just eat instead?
 
February 14, 2007, 11:17 am CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

Quote From: rd_craig72

I'm this womans care provider and she has a mobility cart and does go to the store for herself, and community college,and the movies and other shopping etc etc etc.
 Here's a question for you...do you prepare any of her meals or snacks?
 
February 14, 2007, 11:21 am CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

It is sad! Praying for them and wish the best for them!  Being big is bad for your health!   It can cause all kinds of health problems!!   It puts alot of stress on the body and heart!!
 
February 14, 2007, 1:12 pm CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

Quote From: swchick

The message board  intro  requests:

Imagine your weight getting so out of control that it confines you to your home, to a room, even to a bed.

One problem with that request is I simply cannot imagine how any person of normal intelligence (and lacking any pre-existing invalid condition) could allow themselves to get THAT obese.  Being overweight is uncomfortable;  I can't see how they don't draw the line and make changes at a lower weight.  Food is nice, but it isn't nice enough to feel that bad.

I like to eat,  and I crave french macarons to the point of pain.   I just don't give in.

I've been heavy,  and had begun to suffer health consequences of that.   I drew the line myself  when my BMI hit the first part of the obesity range,  simply because I couldn't stand the way it felt.  How does anyone decide to stop living and just eat instead?
Your statement reads to me like you are assuming that people who get obese to the point where they are housebound might have sub-normal intelligence... If I'm misreading your post, please correct me.Overeating is an addiction. Just like alchoholism, gambling, smoking, and so on... Some people have addictions that take hold of them and they simply cannot help themselves, no matter how hard they try. Nobody chooses to be out of control with food, or alcohol or any other addiction, but life deals you a hand and thatswhat you have to deal with... Just be grateful that you don't have a food addiction as extreme like the people who eat themselves up to 600,700, 800 or 900 pounds or more... I know Bob personally. He is an intelligent man, and very personable, but he's an addict to foodIts just like he's a drug addict, except instead of shooting up, he eats.Addiction can't be turned off like a light switch on a wall. Its a lifelong battle, and some people struggle their whole lives with it... People should be less judgemental when it comes to the morbidly obese. I hope that when Friday's show airs the people that post here don't flame on about Bob and the other large woman on the show that day.
 
February 14, 2007, 1:54 pm CST

Just another substance

You can be addicted to ANY substance, and food is no different.  There are genetic factors as well as medical problems such as smoking cessation, pituitary tumors, brain tumors, depression, kidney failure, cirrhosis, CHF, ovarian cysts, PCOS, Meningitis, and Spina Bifida to name a few.

 

http://www.wrongdiagnosis.com/sym/weight_gain.htm

 

Also, there is Overeater's Anonymous that helps the person overcome what they can control.  They have the whole 12 steps.

 

http://www.oa.org/index.htm

 
February 14, 2007, 9:12 pm CST

Intelligence

Quote From: russjc

Your statement reads to me like you are assuming that people who get obese to the point where they are housebound might have sub-normal intelligence... If I'm misreading your post, please correct me.Overeating is an addiction. Just like alchoholism, gambling, smoking, and so on... Some people have addictions that take hold of them and they simply cannot help themselves, no matter how hard they try. Nobody chooses to be out of control with food, or alcohol or any other addiction, but life deals you a hand and thatswhat you have to deal with... Just be grateful that you don't have a food addiction as extreme like the people who eat themselves up to 600,700, 800 or 900 pounds or more... I know Bob personally. He is an intelligent man, and very personable, but he's an addict to foodIts just like he's a drug addict, except instead of shooting up, he eats.Addiction can't be turned off like a light switch on a wall. Its a lifelong battle, and some people struggle their whole lives with it... People should be less judgemental when it comes to the morbidly obese. I hope that when Friday's show airs the people that post here don't flame on about Bob and the other large woman on the show that day.
You really have to twist what I said to come to that conclusion.   I could understand someone with less than a perfectly normal brain or intelligence eating themselves into such a state.   I realize that people with normal intelligence do as well.   I don't understand how they can be intellegent and choose that path. it's just amazing to me that anyone of normal intelligence can't draw the line when obesity begins to cause discomfort and health problems and is messing up the rest of the persons life, and I REALLY don't get how anyone would fail to do so well before the person ends up so enormous they can't clean themselves or get out of the door without slings and a crew of men.

It's hard to be sympathetic with people who would choose that life over the self denial of eating enough and no more.  I have cravings, I like to eat.  I could easily give into eating yummy food 24/7.  I gave up that kind of gluttony for a better life, not because I'm so great but because it seemed like the only reasonable course of action.

 
February 15, 2007, 4:37 am CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

Quote From: swchick

You really have to twist what I said to come to that conclusion.   I could understand someone with less than a perfectly normal brain or intelligence eating themselves into such a state.   I realize that people with normal intelligence do as well.   I don't understand how they can be intellegent and choose that path. it's just amazing to me that anyone of normal intelligence can't draw the line when obesity begins to cause discomfort and health problems and is messing up the rest of the persons life, and I REALLY don't get how anyone would fail to do so well before the person ends up so enormous they can't clean themselves or get out of the door without slings and a crew of men.

It's hard to be sympathetic with people who would choose that life over the self denial of eating enough and no more.  I have cravings, I like to eat.  I could easily give into eating yummy food 24/7.  I gave up that kind of gluttony for a better life, not because I'm so great but because it seemed like the only reasonable course of action.

Your response skips over any acknowledgment of this as an addiction. No matter how intelligent a person is, when you are addicted to a substance, you can't just simply draw the line, even when you are hurting yourself. Even when you are eating yourself into immobility. Being reasonable AND also an addict don't go together. I applaud that fact that you were able to stop overeating and lose weight, but no matter how hard they try, some people are addicted so powerfully to food that they CANNOT stop, even if it is killing them. These people aren't choosing addiction for themselves. Who would want to be an addict on purpose? Who would want to be so fat that they can't get out of bed anymore? This is not a choice. Its a sickness, and people should be grateful that they don't have a food addiction as severe as the people that end up housebound.
 
February 15, 2007, 8:05 am CST

But addiction is conquerable.

Quote From: russjc

Your response skips over any acknowledgment of this as an addiction. No matter how intelligent a person is, when you are addicted to a substance, you can't just simply draw the line, even when you are hurting yourself. Even when you are eating yourself into immobility. Being reasonable AND also an addict don't go together. I applaud that fact that you were able to stop overeating and lose weight, but no matter how hard they try, some people are addicted so powerfully to food that they CANNOT stop, even if it is killing them. These people aren't choosing addiction for themselves. Who would want to be an addict on purpose? Who would want to be so fat that they can't get out of bed anymore? This is not a choice. Its a sickness, and people should be grateful that they don't have a food addiction as severe as the people that end up housebound.
 Your wrote "when you are addicted to a substance, you can't just simply draw the line"

Oh yes you can.  The "internal pharmacology" of addiction can be conquered.  And food addicts most certainly ARE choosing to satisfy cravings and enjoying the pleasures of eating too much over leading a decent life.   They are choosing to have that kind of "fun" over another kind of life.  I do buy that some people have a tendency to overweight.   They may be intrinsically less active or less muscular.   They may be naturally more sedentary.  That can be fought in many cases and controlled if not overcome.   I do buy that some people may have more appetite and need more food to feel satisfied than others,  whether as a result of some natural variation in the appetite hormones or as a by product of medication, or disease process, etc.   But a tendency to overweight or overeating can be fought and controlled.   I don't buy that a person can't choose to be less satisfied in one way in order to have a more satisfactory existence in another way.

It is possible to limit food that comes into your house, and to not cook, have cooked,  or order food and eat all day long.  Having an appetite isn't the same as satisfying that appetite.
I do not understand how anyone can tolerate the discomfort of being overweight, let alone get to the point of being mega-obese.   I've been literally starving , when I was young and poor.   I've craved fattening foods and done without and felt the discomfort of that.  None of that compares to the misery and pain of being overweight.   It felt worse than any hunger I've ever experienced.

So I can't really wrap my tiny mind around the choice to be super super fat and eat, vs a more sensible and comfortable  choice to eat enough and be nourished and be maybe a bit overweight but not mega obese.


 
February 15, 2007, 12:25 pm CST

Food Addiction

Quote From: swchick

 Your wrote "when you are addicted to a substance, you can't just simply draw the line"

Oh yes you can.  The "internal pharmacology" of addiction can be conquered.  And food addicts most certainly ARE choosing to satisfy cravings and enjoying the pleasures of eating too much over leading a decent life.   They are choosing to have that kind of "fun" over another kind of life.  I do buy that some people have a tendency to overweight.   They may be intrinsically less active or less muscular.   They may be naturally more sedentary.  That can be fought in many cases and controlled if not overcome.   I do buy that some people may have more appetite and need more food to feel satisfied than others,  whether as a result of some natural variation in the appetite hormones or as a by product of medication, or disease process, etc.   But a tendency to overweight or overeating can be fought and controlled.   I don't buy that a person can't choose to be less satisfied in one way in order to have a more satisfactory existence in another way.

It is possible to limit food that comes into your house, and to not cook, have cooked,  or order food and eat all day long.  Having an appetite isn't the same as satisfying that appetite.
I do not understand how anyone can tolerate the discomfort of being overweight, let alone get to the point of being mega-obese.   I've been literally starving , when I was young and poor.   I've craved fattening foods and done without and felt the discomfort of that.  None of that compares to the misery and pain of being overweight.   It felt worse than any hunger I've ever experienced.

So I can't really wrap my tiny mind around the choice to be super super fat and eat, vs a more sensible and comfortable  choice to eat enough and be nourished and be maybe a bit overweight but not mega obese.


A lot of people replace one addiction with another after they have it conquered.  Or sometimes when a very stressful event pops up.  We've all heard of the smoker who quit for 10 years only to start up again.  But, unlike a smoker who can quit cold turkey, you can't quit food cold turkey and that makes it difficult because you need to support your addiction in order to survive.  It's really tough.
 
First | Prev | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Next | Last