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Topic : 06/15 Biggest Reunions Ever

Number of Replies: 364
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Created on : Friday, February 09, 2007, 02:45:44 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 2/16/07) Imagine your weight getting so out of control that it confined you to your home, to a room, even to a bed. Now imagine the isolation you’d feel when you could no longer visit your friends and family, and had to depend on another person for basic needs like food and getting to the bathroom. Cindy, 35, is approximately 500 pounds and completely depends on her 15-year-old daughter, Vikki, for everything. Vikki says because of her mother’s weight, life at home is one big fight, and the only time she had some peace was when Child Welfare removed her for a few weeks. Does Cindy put too many demands on her daughter? Dr. Phil surprises Cindy by reuniting her with her mother, Linda, whom she hasn’t been able to see in eight years. Then, meet a man who has been trapped in his bedroom for over two years. Bob says he hasn’t smelled the outside air in years and has no idea what the real world is like beyond his four bedroom walls. The last time he was able to check his weight, it was 900 pounds. How much does he weigh now? Dr. Phil surprises Bob with a visit from someone who’s become his biggest supporter, a man he speaks with every day but has never met. After seeing doctored photos of their thinner selves, will Cindy and Bob agree to work hard with the resources headed their way? Join the discussion.

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February 15, 2007, 12:33 pm CST

Temporarily Indisposed

Quote From: mike_44

 I was once 600lbs myself. My weight gain was caused from laziness which, in turn, turned into Elephantiasis Lymphedema in my whole lower half, including my groin. Over the past couple decades, I've undergone several surgeries and spent a couple years in nursing homes. (I'm currently in one now waiting for an apartment to open so I can leave.)  During the past couple years, I've lost and gained weight but, I'm still down in the 430's -50's.  I still need some surgeries done but, they won't do it until I lose more weight, despite my telling them that, if they'd do the rest of the surgeries, I can get around a lot better and therefore lose more weight.  This disease has caused me to be ridiculed by my friends and family.  I have no social life due to people not wanting to be around me, unless they have to. All I've ever wanted was to find someone who'll look at me as a person and not as disabled. Unfortunately, in today's society, disabled persons are looked down on. You'd figured they'd have more sense than that!!!

Don't think of yourself as disabled, just "temporarily indisposed."  Once you've lost the weight and deal with your surgeries, you can get your life back on track.  Think of your situation now as just a temporary set-up, much like someone who has been in a car accident and needs to have surgeries, physio, etc. to get better. 

 

Hang in there, Mike, you can do it.  You've come a long way already, baby!

 
February 15, 2007, 12:49 pm CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

Quote From: swchick

 Here's a question for you...do you prepare any of her meals or snacks?
she shops healthy not psycho healthy but she snacks on granola not chips and pop  she drinks water  a lot at least a gallon a day.  Sometimes we fix meals together and she does the cooking. We have kids so all meals take their nutrition into consideration.   Feel free to  e mail me directly  rd_craig72@yahoo.com.
 
February 15, 2007, 5:15 pm CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

Okay, no venom this time, promise.

I wonder though why that woman is willing to perpetuate the stereotype of fat and lazy ( the finger snapping and "let's focus on me",) made my heart ache for that poor kid, she's only fifteen and needs her Mom to care for her, not the other way around, a urine bucket ? Dump it yourself, was that venom ?

I KNOW what this child is going through, having grown up with the obese parent that won't do for themselves, though my Mother did go to the TOILET, sorry but I just can't see past the urine bucket thing, that's disgusting.

This porr kid has no chance at a normal teen life until her Mother gets off her ass and makes a change, but Vickki, you can't do it for her, that's her JOB, not yours you're a fifteen year old who should be going out and having fun, not being trapped at home, isolated from the world, by one person's obvious selfishness.

I wonder where is Dad, and why hasn't he stepped in yet ?

This is ABUSE!

 
February 15, 2007, 5:48 pm CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

Quote From: debivey

Jesh, I agree with you.  It does no good enabling this poor person by giving them the very food that is making them sick both physically and emotionally.  Due to their disability, they are unable to secure food themselves, so the folks that do get it, have the power to help them by buying food that is good for them.

 

So what if the disabled person complains, yells and screams!  All you have to do is walk away and feel good that you are saving a life.  It might feel like torture to them, but living in a body that is not meant to weigh in at 500, 600, 700 pounds is an even worse torture.

 

To the caregivers, God Bless You and be strong for the person you love and are caring for.  DO NOT purchase food that is killing your loved one.  Show them how much you love them by ignoring their wants by giving them what they need!

And I agree with both of you.

My father and sister used to be scared to death to say "NO" or to not get her what she wanted, one day I sat down with both of them, the whole thing about addictions and the blah, blah blah came up and I asked,

"So if she were an alcoholic or Meth addict, would you run out and buy those for her as well ?"

It worked, and now if she wants to complain, we let her, funny the rants are getting shorter and shorter.

 
February 15, 2007, 5:50 pm CST

RE Feb 16 Show

Quote From: rd_craig72

she shops healthy not psycho healthy but she snacks on granola not chips and pop  she drinks water  a lot at least a gallon a day.  Sometimes we fix meals together and she does the cooking. We have kids so all meals take their nutrition into consideration.   Feel free to  e mail me directly  rd_craig72@yahoo.com.
It has been my experience that the life of the compulsive overeater is not so simple as nutrition, behavior, etc. OA works best for me. But the issues, are very deadly serious. Usually they involved some sort of alcoholism, and also ensuing behaviors....of a traumatic nature. It's a deadly serious issue. Lots of times abuse by an alcoholic, INCLUDING SEXUAL, EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL abuse RESULTS IN OBESITY! Unlike other hurts, overeaters eat away the hurt that may indeed be the only way they know, to shield them from this pain of wanting to stop the pain, thus preventing a suicidal attempt or desire. This, like any other disease requires professional therapy, nutrition, and a higher power and possible medication, but more than anything...the person's desire to stop hurting. They must hit their own "bottom". We are many, results of alcoholic, or other compulsively addicted patterns of behavior in the home of origin. We are almost always a sad group, very traumatized. Not very funny at all, but many laugh. I, for one encourage all to stop laughing, and know, these are a TRAUMATIZED lot of people. Not lazy pigs, but traumatized individuals. That is my own personal experience.  Di
 
February 16, 2007, 5:57 am CST

What about Bob?

Quote From: russjc

Hello, My name is Russ, and I'm a friend of Bob who is the 900+ pound man on this coming Friday's Feb 16th show. I contacted Bob last summer after reading about him on the internet, and we've been friends ever since. He's a really great guy, but his weight has made his life really, really difficult not to mention full of pain. I contacted many talk shows onhis behalf to try to get them interested in doing a story on Bob, and the only one who got back to me was Dr. Phil's show. I hope people are supportive of Bob when they see the show, and don't judge him because of his size. He really wants to get his life back on track, and he's been working hard ever since the show taped this episode to do just that. I'll talk to Bob today, and let him know that he should try to come to this message board to answer any questions anyone might have for him. cya later Russ
I am very interested in seeing the show today on the obese.  It really embarrasses me to think that some of you out there can be so critical of people when you may not even really know all the circumstances that led to their obesity.  They are human beings and have feelings just like the rest of us.  I give both of them credit for appearing on the show.  Russ, please let your friend Bob know that at least one of us out here will not be judging him because of his weight, but rather by his personality.  I hope we all will be able to keep up with the progress that is made.  Good Luck!! 
 
February 16, 2007, 6:35 am CST

Emptying a bucket?

I would never make my loved ones clean out a bucket of urine.  If it's a medical thing, wouldn't she have a catheter?  Even then, I'd manage it myself (even if i was obese), and not impose that on my child.  I used to have to clean up my little brother's colostomy- that was a dirty job, but he was just an infant then.  The daughter must be very mature to take care of her mother- keep her clean and grocery shop, and go to school.   I just wish that her mom would take better care of herself so that she can take care of her daughter-you have to be strong for the people you love.

 
February 16, 2007, 7:20 am CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

that lady is ruining her daughter's life!!  All I can say to the daughter is to stand up for yourself!  You are not a dog and nobody should be whistling for you to "come."  I know that is is hard for a minor to stand up against a parent/guardian, but honey, you just hang in there.  For any child to say they were better off in a foster home, - - now that's bad.

 

That mom is sick, physically and mentally and just plain mean.  Get off you fat ass and do each and everything you can do for yourself.   And, those things you cannot do, you need to reach out to social services in your area to get assistance from a professional, not your child! It is nobody's job to empty your slop jar.

 

I understand and believe in the whole food addiction theory.  But meanness, now, well that's just bad!  There are apparently only 2 aspects of the mom's life that she has control over, her daughter and eating - -and she abuses both!

 
February 16, 2007, 7:27 am CST

I agree

Quote From: ceildh1

Okay, no venom this time, promise.

I wonder though why that woman is willing to perpetuate the stereotype of fat and lazy ( the finger snapping and "let's focus on me",) made my heart ache for that poor kid, she's only fifteen and needs her Mom to care for her, not the other way around, a urine bucket ? Dump it yourself, was that venom ?

I KNOW what this child is going through, having grown up with the obese parent that won't do for themselves, though my Mother did go to the TOILET, sorry but I just can't see past the urine bucket thing, that's disgusting.

This porr kid has no chance at a normal teen life until her Mother gets off her ass and makes a change, but Vickki, you can't do it for her, that's her JOB, not yours you're a fifteen year old who should be going out and having fun, not being trapped at home, isolated from the world, by one person's obvious selfishness.

I wonder where is Dad, and why hasn't he stepped in yet ?

This is ABUSE!

You are going to get a lot of hate thrown at you for your post, but I for one agree.  I have recently lost 18, and I have another 20 left to go.  It has been hard damn work but I realized that if I continued down the road I was on I wouldn't be around for my children or my husband.  Only I could make the decision to straighten up and act right
 
February 16, 2007, 7:43 am CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

Quote From: mike_44

 I was once 600lbs myself. My weight gain was caused from laziness which, in turn, turned into Elephantiasis Lymphedema in my whole lower half, including my groin. Over the past couple decades, I've undergone several surgeries and spent a couple years in nursing homes. (I'm currently in one now waiting for an apartment to open so I can leave.)  During the past couple years, I've lost and gained weight but, I'm still down in the 430's -50's.  I still need some surgeries done but, they won't do it until I lose more weight, despite my telling them that, if they'd do the rest of the surgeries, I can get around a lot better and therefore lose more weight.  This disease has caused me to be ridiculed by my friends and family.  I have no social life due to people not wanting to be around me, unless they have to. All I've ever wanted was to find someone who'll look at me as a person and not as disabled. Unfortunately, in today's society, disabled persons are looked down on. You'd figured they'd have more sense than that!!!

You yourself said your weight gain was caused from your own laziness. So you made the choice to be disabled. If you don't want to be looked down upon, then why aren't you taking more aggressive action regarding your obesity?

If you were obese and disabled due to a medical condition through no fault of your own, then I would definitely sympathize with you, but you choose this life due to your, (as you stated), laziness then you wonder why you're looked down upon by your friends and family. What do you expect? 

 
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