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Topic : 06/15 Biggest Reunions Ever

Number of Replies: 364
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Created on : Friday, February 09, 2007, 02:45:44 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 2/16/07) Imagine your weight getting so out of control that it confined you to your home, to a room, even to a bed. Now imagine the isolation you’d feel when you could no longer visit your friends and family, and had to depend on another person for basic needs like food and getting to the bathroom. Cindy, 35, is approximately 500 pounds and completely depends on her 15-year-old daughter, Vikki, for everything. Vikki says because of her mother’s weight, life at home is one big fight, and the only time she had some peace was when Child Welfare removed her for a few weeks. Does Cindy put too many demands on her daughter? Dr. Phil surprises Cindy by reuniting her with her mother, Linda, whom she hasn’t been able to see in eight years. Then, meet a man who has been trapped in his bedroom for over two years. Bob says he hasn’t smelled the outside air in years and has no idea what the real world is like beyond his four bedroom walls. The last time he was able to check his weight, it was 900 pounds. How much does he weigh now? Dr. Phil surprises Bob with a visit from someone who’s become his biggest supporter, a man he speaks with every day but has never met. After seeing doctored photos of their thinner selves, will Cindy and Bob agree to work hard with the resources headed their way? Join the discussion.

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February 11, 2007, 6:54 pm CST

I know what they're going through

 I was once 600lbs myself. My weight gain was caused from laziness which, in turn, turned into Elephantiasis Lymphedema in my whole lower half, including my groin. Over the past couple decades, I've undergone several surgeries and spent a couple years in nursing homes. (I'm currently in one now waiting for an apartment to open so I can leave.)  During the past couple years, I've lost and gained weight but, I'm still down in the 430's -50's.  I still need some surgeries done but, they won't do it until I lose more weight, despite my telling them that, if they'd do the rest of the surgeries, I can get around a lot better and therefore lose more weight.  This disease has caused me to be ridiculed by my friends and family.  I have no social life due to people not wanting to be around me, unless they have to. All I've ever wanted was to find someone who'll look at me as a person and not as disabled. Unfortunately, in today's society, disabled persons are looked down on. You'd figured they'd have more sense than that!!!
 
February 11, 2007, 8:33 pm CST

i could use some advice..

I am in need of some advice and help.. I am going to therapy and I feel like I am living some one elses life, I never thought this would be mine..

 

I was in a relationship since 2000 with the same man, we had our issues, ex's kids.  I left him twice in that time frame and went back twice.  In early 2006 I left for the third time and two months later got married to someone I worked with.  He told me he had been waiting for my ex and I to brake up for the longest time but respected me not to interfer.  I moved out and within one month, the new guy (my current husband)  moved in.  We married in april and I left him in october to go back to my ex.  It is now february 2007 and I left my husband to go to therapy to find out what I really want and who I am.  My husband is in texas and I am in arizona.  He now says he wan'ts to move here and get a job. 

 

I am living in one of  my ex's houses and am in contact with him on a daily basis.  He want's to get back together, I feel totally secure with him.  I don't feel secure with my husband.  He cannot take care of me financially or mentlally, we are not really the same intellictually. 

 

We worked together and he was my knight in shining armour..he called me a princess and tried to rescue me..I felt that I truly loved him and know now that I was trying to resuce him..

 

This story goes on.. I could use any advice or welcome comments good or bad.  thank you

 

 

 
February 11, 2007, 10:34 pm CST

Hang in there Mike !!!!

Quote From: mike_44

 I was once 600lbs myself. My weight gain was caused from laziness which, in turn, turned into Elephantiasis Lymphedema in my whole lower half, including my groin. Over the past couple decades, I've undergone several surgeries and spent a couple years in nursing homes. (I'm currently in one now waiting for an apartment to open so I can leave.)  During the past couple years, I've lost and gained weight but, I'm still down in the 430's -50's.  I still need some surgeries done but, they won't do it until I lose more weight, despite my telling them that, if they'd do the rest of the surgeries, I can get around a lot better and therefore lose more weight.  This disease has caused me to be ridiculed by my friends and family.  I have no social life due to people not wanting to be around me, unless they have to. All I've ever wanted was to find someone who'll look at me as a person and not as disabled. Unfortunately, in today's society, disabled persons are looked down on. You'd figured they'd have more sense than that!!!
Hang in there Mike and I'm sorry that you feel lonely.  There are good people out there that really do care; you just have to pray for them to walk into your life.  But in the meantime, keep a positive outlook and keep on going.  Wow...you've already hurdled over 150 pounds.  That is amazing.  Way to go.  Keep on going MIKE, you can do it !!!!!
 
February 12, 2007, 6:25 am CST

enabling

No person who weighs 500+ pounds goes to the grocery store. When my mother gave me a 2 page list including mostly junk food, I just substitued healthier foods and listened to her yell. It was worth it to get a healthier mom. Anyone who cares for their family/friend is enabling their addiction by "feeding"into it.
 
February 12, 2007, 7:47 am CST

I AGREE!

Quote From: jesh1234

No person who weighs 500+ pounds goes to the grocery store. When my mother gave me a 2 page list including mostly junk food, I just substitued healthier foods and listened to her yell. It was worth it to get a healthier mom. Anyone who cares for their family/friend is enabling their addiction by "feeding"into it.

Jesh, I agree with you.  It does no good enabling this poor person by giving them the very food that is making them sick both physically and emotionally.  Due to their disability, they are unable to secure food themselves, so the folks that do get it, have the power to help them by buying food that is good for them.

 

So what if the disabled person complains, yells and screams!  All you have to do is walk away and feel good that you are saving a life.  It might feel like torture to them, but living in a body that is not meant to weigh in at 500, 600, 700 pounds is an even worse torture.

 

To the caregivers, God Bless You and be strong for the person you love and are caring for.  DO NOT purchase food that is killing your loved one.  Show them how much you love them by ignoring their wants by giving them what they need!

 
February 12, 2007, 8:09 am CST

DON'T BLAME YOUR DOCTOR!

Quote From: navywifeandmom

Hang in there Mike and I'm sorry that you feel lonely.  There are good people out there that really do care; you just have to pray for them to walk into your life.  But in the meantime, keep a positive outlook and keep on going.  Wow...you've already hurdled over 150 pounds.  That is amazing.  Way to go.  Keep on going MIKE, you can do it !!!!!

Hi Mike,

 

I'm proud of you  that you lost so much weight, keep doing it!  I'm sure the Doctors are concerned for your safety and do not want to put you at risk while you are still so heavy.  Keep doing what you are doing and lose more.

 

These so called 'friends' are not real friends treating you the way they do, drop them.  I know you can't pick your family and it sounds to me like they need an "attitude adjustment".  It's their problem, not yours.

 

Your job is to set goals toward losing the weight and looking forward to the day you are able to have the surgery that will improve and save your life!  I'm sure it's not easy, but you appear strong just by the fact that you've already lost a considerable amount of weight.

 

The way I look at it, you've already lost over one of me.  I weigh 140 pounds now, but I didn't weigh that one year ago.  After I had open heart, I gained over 30 pounds, but lost it and it wasn't easy.

 

God Bless You

 
February 12, 2007, 10:20 pm CST

been there

Quote From: lauralaschiava

I am in need of some advice and help.. I am going to therapy and I feel like I am living some one elses life, I never thought this would be mine..

 

I was in a relationship since 2000 with the same man, we had our issues, ex's kids.  I left him twice in that time frame and went back twice.  In early 2006 I left for the third time and two months later got married to someone I worked with.  He told me he had been waiting for my ex and I to brake up for the longest time but respected me not to interfer.  I moved out and within one month, the new guy (my current husband)  moved in.  We married in april and I left him in october to go back to my ex.  It is now february 2007 and I left my husband to go to therapy to find out what I really want and who I am.  My husband is in texas and I am in arizona.  He now says he wan'ts to move here and get a job. 

 

I am living in one of  my ex's houses and am in contact with him on a daily basis.  He want's to get back together, I feel totally secure with him.  I don't feel secure with my husband.  He cannot take care of me financially or mentlally, we are not really the same intellictually. 

 

We worked together and he was my knight in shining armour..he called me a princess and tried to rescue me..I felt that I truly loved him and know now that I was trying to resuce him..

 

This story goes on.. I could use any advice or welcome comments good or bad.  thank you

 

 

    I'VE BEEN THERE,  I HAD TWO MEN ATEMPT TO KEEP ME FROM LIVING MY  LIFE FOR FIVE YEARS.  AND ON REFLECTION  IT WAS THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE.  AFTER I LEFT BOTH OF THEM FOR GOOD, I  TOOK MYSELF ON AN TEN YEAR JOURNEY, WITHOUT DATING, IN FACT WITHOUT MEN.  I WORKED WITH THEM, I WAS CORDIAL AND NICE BUT I DIDN'T GO TO DINNER OR MOVIES OR ANY THING THAT COULD BE PERCEIVED AS A DATE. I GOT A JOB AND WENT BACK TO SCHOOL ALL WHILE I WAS LIVING IN A HOMELESS SHELTER WITH MY THEN 9 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER ( SHE'S NOW 20 ). DURING MY SELF IMPOSED CELIBACY I LEARNED THAT I LIKE WHO I AM, I ENJOYED COMING HOME TO MY OWN LITTLE 500 SQUARE FT APT. (WE MOVED THERE FROM THE SHELTER  AFTER GRADUATION) I LIKED CREATING LITTLE ADVENTURES FOR MYSELF AND MY DAUGHTER AND SOME ADVENTURES JUST FOR ME! AND SAVING UP TO GO ON VACATION WAS THE BEST.  SHE SPENT SOME TIME WITH OUR FRIENDS FROM TENNESSEE AND I WENT UP A SMALL MOUNTAIN PART WAY IN THE CAR AND PART WAY ON FOOT IT WAS GREAT . I'M NOT IN A PERFECT RELATIONSHIP NOW  BUT I'M STABLE.  AND IF I HAD NOT GIVEN MYSELF THAT TIME AND SOME THERAPY I WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ABLE TO HANDLE MY CURRENT LIFE!! I HAVE THREE LIVING KIDS 20, 13 (STEPSON, HE'S MAJORLY NEUROTIC), AND 3.OUR THIRD CHILD WOULD HAVE BEEN 5 IN NOV. SHE PASSED AWAY AT 17 DAYS OLD. THAT ONE SHOOK MY SOUL. AND TAUGHT ME WHAT LIFE WAS REALLY ABOUT.  I WISH YOU MUCH LUCK AND ONLY HAPPY ADVENTURES.   SINCERELY SANDIE
 
February 13, 2007, 5:07 pm CST

Ex's are ex's

Quote From: genny2

    I'VE BEEN THERE,  I HAD TWO MEN ATEMPT TO KEEP ME FROM LIVING MY  LIFE FOR FIVE YEARS.  AND ON REFLECTION  IT WAS THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE.  AFTER I LEFT BOTH OF THEM FOR GOOD, I  TOOK MYSELF ON AN TEN YEAR JOURNEY, WITHOUT DATING, IN FACT WITHOUT MEN.  I WORKED WITH THEM, I WAS CORDIAL AND NICE BUT I DIDN'T GO TO DINNER OR MOVIES OR ANY THING THAT COULD BE PERCEIVED AS A DATE. I GOT A JOB AND WENT BACK TO SCHOOL ALL WHILE I WAS LIVING IN A HOMELESS SHELTER WITH MY THEN 9 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER ( SHE'S NOW 20 ). DURING MY SELF IMPOSED CELIBACY I LEARNED THAT I LIKE WHO I AM, I ENJOYED COMING HOME TO MY OWN LITTLE 500 SQUARE FT APT. (WE MOVED THERE FROM THE SHELTER  AFTER GRADUATION) I LIKED CREATING LITTLE ADVENTURES FOR MYSELF AND MY DAUGHTER AND SOME ADVENTURES JUST FOR ME! AND SAVING UP TO GO ON VACATION WAS THE BEST.  SHE SPENT SOME TIME WITH OUR FRIENDS FROM TENNESSEE AND I WENT UP A SMALL MOUNTAIN PART WAY IN THE CAR AND PART WAY ON FOOT IT WAS GREAT . I'M NOT IN A PERFECT RELATIONSHIP NOW  BUT I'M STABLE.  AND IF I HAD NOT GIVEN MYSELF THAT TIME AND SOME THERAPY I WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ABLE TO HANDLE MY CURRENT LIFE!! I HAVE THREE LIVING KIDS 20, 13 (STEPSON, HE'S MAJORLY NEUROTIC), AND 3.OUR THIRD CHILD WOULD HAVE BEEN 5 IN NOV. SHE PASSED AWAY AT 17 DAYS OLD. THAT ONE SHOOK MY SOUL. AND TAUGHT ME WHAT LIFE WAS REALLY ABOUT.  I WISH YOU MUCH LUCK AND ONLY HAPPY ADVENTURES.   SINCERELY SANDIE
I agree!  Keep your ex's just as they are - ex's.  Concentrate on yourself instead of being the ball in this ping pong game.  Good luck to you!
 
February 13, 2007, 8:40 pm CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

 I am over weight not as big as that person is,but i am losing it now  i stared Dr.phil ultimate weight lose solution you do as he says in the book you will lose weight. i started 2 weeks ago and have lose 8 lbs.it really works great
 
February 13, 2007, 10:22 pm CST

02/16 Biggest Reunions Ever

Quote From: jesh1234

No person who weighs 500+ pounds goes to the grocery store. When my mother gave me a 2 page list including mostly junk food, I just substitued healthier foods and listened to her yell. It was worth it to get a healthier mom. Anyone who cares for their family/friend is enabling their addiction by "feeding"into it.
I'm this womans care provider and she has a mobility cart and does go to the store for herself, and community college,and the movies and other shopping etc etc etc.
 
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