I have been a parent of a special needs child now for 16 years. My son was initially diagnosed as autistic because of his lack of socialization with other students, and his language development. He started to lose what little language he had at 5 1/2 years old, and his condition has since been a degenerative disorder. (Scoliosis,seizures, needs to be catheterized and cannot communicate via sign language because he does not have the motor skills to do this.) He has been in a special education program since he was 2 years old, and has been in contact with many professionals in his life, (occupational therapists, speech therapists, geneticists, nephrologists, urologists, and many neurologists, and there is not any answer to what is going on with him. He is currently nonverbal, and works with switches at school to communicate. Considering his inability to communicate, he does not show any frustration beacause he is on a strict schedule, and his needs are anticipated by those who care for him. The school, my mother, and I have tried for many years to toilet train him, but to this day, he still wears diapers. He is put on the toilet regularly, and will go in the toilet at predictable times, but still has some accidents at times in his diaper. Try to do this with 3 children at once. Sometimes it is just not possible for individuals with disabilities to communicate. There may be neurological issues going on with these triplets as well.
As far as the government goes, it depends on what state you live in, as to what assistance you are able to receive.
Sometimes we as parents of children with disabilities pursue many options, and do much research, and still cannot get our children to communicate or be toilet trained. If your child is at the severe end of the disability spectrum, you are looking at caring for needs that they cannot perform on their own, because they are physically unable. I have to do hand over hand feeding with my child, and bathe him everyday. He will not ever be an independent human being.
Also, if you don't have the financial means to do all this, these children fall through the cracks. Since you are in the medical field, I am sure that you are aware that the insurance company will only pay a certain percentage of outside therapies. (speech,occupational therapy, and physical therapy.
Each child with a disability needs to be looked at individually. There may be other physical reasons why these triplets are not toilet trained, or that they cannot communicate. I don't think that is not because the parents have not tried. I could not imagine trying to toilet train 3 children with special needs all at once. This family does need additional help, but I don't think that the reason these triplets are not toilet trained or do not communicate because of the parenting.
As a a parent of a child with a disability, everyone seems to have the answers of what is best for my son, including my family. Unless you are in the shoes of being a parent of child or children with disabilities, it is difficult to comprehend the full scope of all the challenges that we face on a day to day basis.
(Original Air Date: 02/28/07) Most parents find raising a child overwhelming enough, but imagine if your child could neither see you, nor hear you. Now imagine having that child times three. Liz is the mother of deaf and blind triplets. Her three daughters are now 6 years old, but one of the girls communicates at a 2-year-old level, and the other two at only a 10-month-old level. Liz's world is consumed with their 24-hour care, plus the care of her oldest daughter, who is 10 and often overlooked among the chaos of the triplets. After years of dealing with the girls on her own, a new man stepped into Liz's life to fill the shoes of her ex-husband. George thought he could become Liz's hero, but their relationship has been strained from the start, and the stress is tearing them apart. See what a day in Liz and George's lives is like, and the surprises Dr. Phil has in store for them. Plus, meet an inspirational woman who says her world turned from light to dark at the age of 15. She has a message for George and Liz. Join the discussion.
