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Topic : 03/12 The Dr. Phil House: Man Camp, Part 6

Number of Replies: 108
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Created on : Friday, March 09, 2007, 12:37:32 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Four months have passed since Scott and Tara, John and Cherie, and Nic and Amanda moved out of The Dr. Phil House, armed with tools to save their crumbling marriages. One couple has curbed their fighting but now reveals an issue that the wife says is tearing them apart. Why did they keep it a secret from Dr. Phil? Then, a couple learning to work together sees the changes in their children but still struggles with issues from the past. Plus, a reinvigorated pair say they’re best friends again and falling back in love. Which marriages are thriving, and which one is hanging on by a thread? Talk about the show here.

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March 12, 2007, 1:31 pm CDT

Odds & Ends

Quote From: momisme2

I agree with both of you and your thoughts on stripping as well as the infedility issue.  Its nice to see some different views about the whole thing.   For a change!  lol

I dont agree with you about the alcohol thing though.  They were in the house for a week working on some serious issues.  Imo, they should have gone without the beers.  I dont think that would necessarily be sterlizing the house atmosphere, just some common sense.   But then, im not a fan of beer drinking, so perhaps im biased.  LOL

Regarding my daughter... since a veterinarian is in the medical field the costs and time was not a shock to me.  Perhaps I should have mentioned that kinda thing to her before hand.  I always just encouraged, never spoke of the long road it would be.  I have told her that its ridiculous to let others sway her.  She wants it, she should go for it!  Hopefully she will continue to pursue it instead of leaning towards working as a vet technician.  Which is what her counselors are pushing.  Believe that? 

I also agree that her working and paying for it with our help(and yes, she does already work part time)would probably be far more rewarding for her.  I just cant help but to want to hand them the money and watch them work part time, instead of full time, while they go to college.  Funny thing is, it seems to upset ME far more then it does my kids!  LOL

Count me in on the "stripping causes infidelity" issue...To reiterate what I said on 1 of the earlier installments, that argument is ludicrous.

 

I'm torn about the beer in the house...I guess Dr. Phil et al.  wanted to get the "real picture," but it was a situation that could have gotten out of hand very easily.

 

Regarding your daughter...I wonder just why the HS counselors are pushing the vet tech path? I wonder if their judgment isn't clouded somewhat by your apparent financial status and her prospects for scholarships? Sad. However, don't let the counselors convice the 2 of you that being a vet tech is "dead-end." A former colleague of mine graduated HS, got her 2-year degree, and worked as a vet tech for a couple of years before she decided to return to school to finish her B.S. Were it not for Organic Chemistry (LOL), she probably would have gone on to vet school. 

 

Of course, it gets to you more than it gets to them...it's frustrating when you want to smooth the path for your offspring, and you can't.

 
March 12, 2007, 1:36 pm CDT

03/12 The Dr. Phil House: Man Camp, Part 6

wow im burned out on this show  lol just too many parts over too long of a time frame.
 
March 12, 2007, 1:58 pm CDT

The Loss of Your Spouse

Quote From: taborl

I will tell you what real is - I lost the love of my life in October when he died due to septic shock.    If you guys  truly love each other you need to get over yourselves and think about what life would be like without each other.

 

The happiest day of my  life was the day I married my husband and the absolute worst day of my life was the day I lost him.  There is not an hour of every day that I don't relive those last few hours with him.

 

You will be sorry someday when you wake up and the other half of your life is not there beside you or when something good or something bad happens to you and there is absolutely no one to share it with or to help you get through it. 

 

You think you have it rough, you don't know anything.  Either make a decision that your spouse is the most important thing in your life.  More important that always being right, always having the last word, always thinking of yourself instead of him or her - of course if you don't truly love and respect each other all of this is just a bunch of crap to you, so get a divorce and get on with your life, but if you do love each other, the next time you think you need to win an argument or think of cheating on each other, then think of your partner not being there anymore and the fact that they never will be again,

I am truly sorry for your loss, it sounds as if he was everything to you.  I want you to know the thought of John dying has always been in the back of my mind.  This is why I had to give it one las try.  RESPECT means everything to me and I have learned that the hard way, not that I have not respected him, but I thought I was always right.  My prayers go out to you and I will take what you have said and really realize that we have a choice, unlike you.  Take care, Glod Bless, Cheri
 
March 12, 2007, 1:58 pm CDT

12 Step Program needed

 For Scott and Tara, they need to attend an open meeting that has an AA speaker and Al-Anon speaker to see if they could identify with them.  I was very much in the same situation as Tara.  But I went to Al-anon where I discovered that I couldn't change him but I have to change my attitude toward alcoholism.  Neither could I cure him or was I the cause of it. When my husband hit bottom, he was fortunate that I was in Al-Anon, I would of divorced him for what he had done if I wasn't.  Even if Scott doesn't get sober she should stay go, Even if they break up she should go and rediscover herself.
 
March 12, 2007, 2:25 pm CDT

Drama Queen

Quote From: kphilips10

I am guessing that Nic and Amanda are the ones on the true road to recovery.  I am not surprised to learn that Scott is a drinker.  He exhibited signs of that during the previous shows.  I am surprised that Dr. Phil didn't pick up on it.  Or maybe he did and didn't say anything - makes for a better final show.  I still am of the opinion that Cherie is a drama queen and likes being a nag.  I can't see her changing -- even for the kids.  Th cycle of abuse will continue in her family.
I was not going to respond to your opinion, but after putting all the effort I did into the show I am going to comment on you "drama queen"!!!!  I have had enough drama in my life that you can not even imagine.  If I was a nag or drama queen than I probably would not be in this relationship.  John is not one to have constant conflicts and my biggest problem is that through out marriage I NEVER spoke up, but being on the show, it gave me a safe haven to be able to speak up for once.  You must not be or ever have been in this kind of relationship, because if you have that statement would have been the farthest thing from your mind.  I am totally the opposite, I had the hardest time on the show confronting John, but I have found a way to be able to do that now.  You must really believe JOHNS'PUT DOWNS TO ME'.  You really believe that that personality as you described would mesh well with John's behavior.  Think about it.  The producers on the show really helped me stand up to John and maybe you are taking that out of text, , but oh well, your opinion is yours and I hope the viewers that really understood what I was going through can actually say "ABOUT TIME CHERI" , YOU FINALLY GOT A BACKBONE,"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  It's a shame that you could not be more positive instead of the negativity you portray.  By the way, the cycle is ending!!!!!!!!!
 
March 12, 2007, 3:02 pm CDT

Cheri & Tara...

Quote From: cherijohn_91

I was not going to respond to your opinion, but after putting all the effort I did into the show I am going to comment on you "drama queen"!!!!  I have had enough drama in my life that you can not even imagine.  If I was a nag or drama queen than I probably would not be in this relationship.  John is not one to have constant conflicts and my biggest problem is that through out marriage I NEVER spoke up, but being on the show, it gave me a safe haven to be able to speak up for once.  You must not be or ever have been in this kind of relationship, because if you have that statement would have been the farthest thing from your mind.  I am totally the opposite, I had the hardest time on the show confronting John, but I have found a way to be able to do that now.  You must really believe JOHNS'PUT DOWNS TO ME'.  You really believe that that personality as you described would mesh well with John's behavior.  Think about it.  The producers on the show really helped me stand up to John and maybe you are taking that out of text, , but oh well, your opinion is yours and I hope the viewers that really understood what I was going through can actually say "ABOUT TIME CHERI" , YOU FINALLY GOT A BACKBONE,"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  It's a shame that you could not be more positive instead of the negativity you portray.  By the way, the cycle is ending!!!!!!!!!

Cheri- I think you and John are doing really well.  I think you both tend to hold things in- but he has a tendency to explode more often, but I think he's getting better.  Marriage is hard- I know I have to make an effort to relax in mine or I'll go on a killing spree! :D  The show is edited to show your problem areas that need to be addressed in the show and all you see are the escalations and the fighting.  I hope you both feel safe enough to talk to each other and problem solve.

 

Tara- I really hope Scott stays clean/sober.  I think that if he can get over that hump, that would be a major stepping stone to repairing your relationship (whether it's as a couple or just co-paretns).  I think you're both good people and I wish everyone the best in their marriages.

 

 

 
March 12, 2007, 3:06 pm CDT

On a side note....

I was just wondering, what finally made you guys decide to write to Dr. Phil?  I have a horrible, terrible relationship with my MIL that is getting out of hand and I'm just sick of it.  And I've often thought about writing Dr. Phil, but really don't want to be on TV and dismiss it. 

 

But I keep thinking about it and I saw on the home page that they're looking for people for a show "Trouble with your In-laws."  What made you decide,  "who cares if I'm on TV, something's gotta give."????

 
March 12, 2007, 3:19 pm CDT

Choices

i will probably take grief for this but these weren't very nice people. I realize they were in pain but no one was nice... even to the other couples. In life we don't get to chose if we are good looking or smart or even lucky but we sure do chose to be nice . None of them did. No for a minute that was broadcast. Cheri and Tara was it looked down their noses at Amanda and even in fact tried to undermined her with her husband. They  judged HER when they both had obvious failings of their own. I don't get it . i am at a loss as to how any marriage can survive without kindness.

 
March 12, 2007, 3:27 pm CDT

Stupid questions for Cheri

Quote From: cherijohn_91

I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE A STATEMENT REGARDING THIS WHOLE SERIES.  THE SIX OF US PUT ALOT OF OUR TIME AND EFFORT INTO THIS SHOW BECAUSE WE WANTED TO MAKE OUR MARRIAGES WORK.  I UNDERSTAND YOU ALL HAVE OPINIONS REGARDING OUR DEMEANOR ON THE SHOW, BUT I WOULD LIKE EVERYONE TO KNOW WE PUT OURSELVES INTO DR PHILS HANDS.  WE TAPED FOR MANY DAYS AND ON TOP OF THAT PUT A LOT OF OUR HOME LIVES INTO TAPING AS WELL.  OUR EFFORTS WERE ALL WELL INTENDED.  I WISH YOU ALL COULD HAVE SEEN EVERYTHING WE ENDURED, AND I AGREE THAT ALOT OF THE SILLY THINGS THAT WERE SHOWN INSTEAD OF SHOWING HOW HARD WE WORKED THROUGHOUT THAT WEEK.  WE ALL HAD OUR ARGUMENTS, BUT REALIZE WE WERE PUT INTO A HOUSE BRINGING IN ALOT OF OUR OWN BAGGAGE AND ADD THAT UP WITH TWO OTHER COUPLES BRINGING IN THEIR PROBLEMS AS WELL.  IT WAS IRRATIBLE AT TIMES, BUT THERE WERE ALSO TIMES IN THE HOUSE THAT WE COULD NOT STOP LAUGHING.    TARA, SCOTT, AMANDA, NIC HOLD ON TO THOSES MEMORIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!BY THE WAY SCOTT I FOUND ANOTHER CLOTHES PIN IN MY LUGGAGE. LOL.  THE LAST EPISODE SHOWED ALOT OF MIXED EMOTIONS BETWEEN US ALL, THAT WAS THE REAL PORTAYAL OF OUR WEEK IN THE HOUSE, FIGHTING, LAUGHING, CRYING, HUGGING AND ALOT OFCOMMUNICATING (WITHOUT YELLING), WE ALL WISH YOU COULD HAVE SEEN IT ALL, BUT WE WOULD BE GOING INTO THE SUMMER MONTHS AND I KNOW IF A QUARTER OF WHAT WE LIVED IN THAT HOUSE WAS SHOWN, ALOT OF PEOPLE WOULD HAVE DIFFERENT OPINIONS OF US.   THANKS FOR ALL OF YOUR SUPPORT, CHERI

Cheri, thanks for that posting.  I hope you're allowed to comment...

 

Are all of you going to continue supporting each other now that man camp is over?  What's your take on the way Scott is acting towards Tara now?  Tara learned boundaries.  I say any addiction whether its food, alchohol or drugs, gets in the way of issues that need to be taken care of.  The problems are enough to deal with.

 

I have to say the arguing you guys did with each other, lol, its not easy living with people ya don't know.  The spaghetti sauce fight was a bit strange... I like Prego myself... but if Amanda used Ragu, Pearl could've faxed a coupon to Amanda.

 

Soooooooo, Cheri LOL, when the six of you have a reunion, you're gonna do the "remember when..." With Dr. Phil's help, you'll have new memories to share with each other.

 

Pearlhanna

 

 

 
March 12, 2007, 3:29 pm CDT

MANY,MANY BLESSED YEARS TO YOU NIC AND AMANDA

Quote From: gwarrior6

He was the only guy that wrote in to the show.  He really does care about his marriage and about Amanda (not that the other two don't, I think they all made great strides and all humans are works in progress).    I think he's more passive than the other two...it's hard to tell what is going on with him because he's not very vocal.  I think he tries to keep the peace, but other than that he seems like a nice guy.  Actually, I like them both-can relate to Amanda more than the other two.  I hope they're doing well- I wonder if she's almost finished with school. 

  Watching today show, I came out feeling that Amanda and Nik are true winners and have a beautiful heart for one another.  They have the spark in their eyes and their body language showed their commitment to one another.  I was THRILLED to hear amanda quit stripping and has found life to be maybe more challenging financially, but more fullfilling in all of the other area's of her life.  She looks better, sounds better, and I think she feels better about herself since shw quit.  Way to go Amanda. 

  Life and marriage will bring many chanllenges , I have been married 26 years and have 2 grown children now in college and I can still remember rolling money to take to the bank to buy diapers.  Every mountain and every struggle was accomplished through love . 

   I hope you both have many , many blessed years of becoming stronger through the challenges life throws your way to see the rainbow shine after the rain.  Love to the both of you.  You both look and sound great.

  To Nic , there is a man who really loves his wife and respects his marriage.  Don't loose  the flicker in the flame of your love, better times are ahead for both of you.

 
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