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Topic : 03/26 The Dr. Phil House: Teen Intervention Follow-Up

Number of Replies: 90
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Created on : Friday, March 23, 2007, 10:06:27 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Alex was an out-of-control 14-year-old who was stealing, running away, doing drugs and prostituting herself to older men when her family turned her in to Dr. Phil. After a tumultuous stay in The Dr. Phil House, Alex said goodbye to her mother, Kim, her grandmother, Jeanette, and her aunt, Enza, and headed to a therapeutic academy to be in a healthy learning environment. Six weeks have passed since Alex left and her family returned home without her. How has she adjusted to her new structured environment? Have Kim, Jeanette and Enza put aside their judgments and accusations, and come together once and for all? As Kim prepares for her daughter’s return, has she turned around the toxic family environment that contributed to Alex’s unhealthy behavior? Talk about the show here.

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March 29, 2007, 8:56 am CDT

mm...i don't think so

Quote From: gman37

I understand that she is interested in the well being of the child, but to alienate the parent from the child is giving the child a negitive outlook on her mother.   If the daughter were to look at the tape, she would only see how she is on her side but not interested in trying to deal with the relationship that is with her sister and her mother... Phil you might want to give this one a look over.

 

It seems there is something deeper with Ms. E. and her relationship with her sibling than meets the eye.

 

Much love to all G.

  I love that you look for the good in people. You must be a good person. That said, I must disagree. Enza, IMO, cares nothing for Alex. She uses her. Alex's transgressions were the perfect avenue for Enza to point fingers at Kim's parenting (what would she know about it??) and to try and make herself look like a hero. That's about it.
 
March 29, 2007, 9:53 pm CDT

Kim is not ready to be the perfect mother

None of the women in this family are sounding true and honest to me.  Enza makes everything sound as if she is the hero.  To me, she is minipulative, deceitful, self-centered and cruel beyond belief.  Grandma must have some real hang-ups from her youth.  She is cold and critical and it seems she has undermined her daughter's self image and her ability to become a good mother.  The show did not get into her morals or behaviors during her daughter's young years.  I don't think Kim is ready to take on the role of mother to her children.  She has failed in the past and is likely fail in the future. I don't think an on line self help program can make anyone a better mother.   Whatever short comings she may have set the stage to allow her mother and Enza to get involved as they did.  Any strong, smart, sane person would have denied either of them to interfer.  What was Kim doing when her daughter was growing up. 
 
March 30, 2007, 2:34 pm CDT

I respect your right to your opinion.

Quote From: humblehermit

I signed up for the message board after viewing this particular show, I have something to say.

 

Dr. Phil gazed into this girl's eyes with a look of seeming admiration and respect, and told her she wasn't a bad kid and that she was "a precious child"...  I'm sorry but a girl that's going on 15 years old and is willingly prostituting herself, knows exactly what she is doing; She is not a child, she is a young adult or at the very least, an adolescent that needs to start learning what  intellectual and moral accountability are. 

 

That girl needed a firm reality check and a wake-up call but what she got was the equivalent of a kiss on the cheek and a pat on the head.  As much as I can appreciate Dr. Phil's intent to be gentle with younger people, I think he's putting just a tad too much sugar coating on his approach with anyone who isn't of age.

 

I've noticed that older guests on the show receive very little if any compassion from Dr. Phil.  It is a fact that in my opinion, Dr. Phil seems to have virtually zero tolerance for bad behavior in adults, I've seen him be downright disrespectful and just plain nasty toward guests who were on the show expecting help (not a verbal beatdown).  But adolescents usually always always tend to get the sugar-coated, "kiss on the cheek" treatment regardless.  I don't approve.

 

  

But I don't agree with you. I think a 15 year old is not mature enough to make responsible adult decisions. She is coming from a troubled background and is getting the help and guidance she so desperately needs. I think that DrPhil gave her a firm reality check and a wake-up call. He also provided a place for her to go and get help.Out of curiousity what would you suggest should have been done? This is a young girl with the potential to go on and live a fruitful life. Have you watched the previous shows?
 
March 30, 2007, 3:00 pm CDT

03/26 The Dr. Phil House: Teen Intervention Follow-Up

Quote From: housewife52

But I don't agree with you. I think a 15 year old is not mature enough to make responsible adult decisions. She is coming from a troubled background and is getting the help and guidance she so desperately needs. I think that DrPhil gave her a firm reality check and a wake-up call. He also provided a place for her to go and get help.Out of curiousity what would you suggest should have been done? This is a young girl with the potential to go on and live a fruitful life. Have you watched the previous shows?

I stand by what I said and have nothing further to add.

 
March 31, 2007, 5:28 am CDT

And I still disagree with you.

Quote From: humblehermit

I stand by what I said and have nothing further to add.

I accept that we all have the right to our opinions. But your thinking on this subject is archaic. From my mother's and grandmother's time. We have to be pro-kids. Yes at 15 they are kids. What good would it have done to have told Alex that she knew what she was doing and should have known better? We would be going backward instead of forward. And we would be letting those pedophiles who were taking advantage of her, off the hook. No way!
 
March 31, 2007, 3:46 pm CDT

03/26 The Dr. Phil House: Teen Intervention Follow-Up

Quote From: humblehermit

I signed up for the message board after viewing this particular show, I have something to say.

 

Dr. Phil gazed into this girl's eyes with a look of seeming admiration and respect, and told her she wasn't a bad kid and that she was "a precious child"...  I'm sorry but a girl that's going on 15 years old and is willingly prostituting herself, knows exactly what she is doing; She is not a child, she is a young adult or at the very least, an adolescent that needs to start learning what  intellectual and moral accountability are. 

 

That girl needed a firm reality check and a wake-up call but what she got was the equivalent of a kiss on the cheek and a pat on the head.  As much as I can appreciate Dr. Phil's intent to be gentle with younger people, I think he's putting just a tad too much sugar coating on his approach with anyone who isn't of age.

 

I've noticed that older guests on the show receive very little if any compassion from Dr. Phil.  It is a fact that in my opinion, Dr. Phil seems to have virtually zero tolerance for bad behavior in adults, I've seen him be downright disrespectful and just plain nasty toward guests who were on the show expecting help (not a verbal beatdown).  But adolescents usually always always tend to get the sugar-coated, "kiss on the cheek" treatment regardless.  I don't approve.

 

  

Maybe he treats these people differently because their brains are different.  As a professional, and an intellectual Dr. Phil recognizes that the human brain doesn't click from "child" to "adult" at 14 or something.  A teen has a TEEN brains, it's not done growing and they NEED different treatment.


 
April 1, 2007, 8:22 am CDT

03/26 The Dr. Phil House: Teen Intervention Follow-Up

Quote From: redusa40

  I love that you look for the good in people. You must be a good person. That said, I must disagree. Enza, IMO, cares nothing for Alex. She uses her. Alex's transgressions were the perfect avenue for Enza to point fingers at Kim's parenting (what would she know about it??) and to try and make herself look like a hero. That's about it.
I agree with your assessment about her real motives.  She pretty much defines the self-riteous nature of busybodies!
 
April 2, 2007, 8:09 am CDT

Enza Butt Out

Quote From: mbkstep

I agree with your assessment about her real motives.  She pretty much defines the self-riteous nature of busybodies!

I'm glad Alex got the help she needed. She didn't need Dr. Phil telling her how bad she is. She already feels bad about herself. She needed to be told she was precious and that she CAN turn her life around. I worry about the peer pressure when she goes back to school, although I'm sure that as good as Aspen is they've dealt with her about that.

 

It seems as if the adults needed to go to sleep-away camp too. What a crew! I hope that if Jeanette moves out of Kim's house she will have the opportunity become more of a Grandma and find enjoyment in that. I know I couldn't live with my mother either.

 

Kim seems to be just sleep-walking through life. I think she means well, but she doesn't seem to know who she really is. It seems as if she could use some counseling to figure that out.

 

Enza! Enza, Enza, ENZA! Does she not have enough in her life that she has to try to run other people's lives too? I'm sure God thanks her everyday for all the help she gives Him. She probably doesn't think He can run the world without her either. I didn't see anything about HER children. Does she have any? Is she a perfect mother? She seems totally manipulative, at least from the clips we saw, and as if every word and movement she makes is for affect. Everything seems to be about HER, how SHE feels, how SHE wants Kim's household to run, how all the good stuff happened because of HER, and how SHE'S the hero. But she's totally blind as to HER part in the mess. How would she feel if someone came into her house and picked at everything she did, put her down to her family, and caused disruption? If she's the sister-in-law where is her husband? Doesn't he have the cajones to tell her to SHUT-UP? Or does she completely control him?

 

I agree that they all would be better off with Enza out of their lives, but I'm sure that when Alex goes home Enza will be back manipulating things again.

 

I understand that Dr. Phil's focus had to be Alex, but why wasn't a little more time spent on these adults? I would be very interested in hearing why Dr. Phil didn't come down harder on Enza, and help her see what she's doing. I think it was touched on, but it didn't seem as if she got it, and will be the same old destructive source at the next opportunity.

 
April 2, 2007, 8:32 am CDT

Compassion

Quote From: humblehermit

I signed up for the message board after viewing this particular show, I have something to say.

 

Dr. Phil gazed into this girl's eyes with a look of seeming admiration and respect, and told her she wasn't a bad kid and that she was "a precious child"...  I'm sorry but a girl that's going on 15 years old and is willingly prostituting herself, knows exactly what she is doing; She is not a child, she is a young adult or at the very least, an adolescent that needs to start learning what  intellectual and moral accountability are. 

 

That girl needed a firm reality check and a wake-up call but what she got was the equivalent of a kiss on the cheek and a pat on the head.  As much as I can appreciate Dr. Phil's intent to be gentle with younger people, I think he's putting just a tad too much sugar coating on his approach with anyone who isn't of age.

 

I've noticed that older guests on the show receive very little if any compassion from Dr. Phil.  It is a fact that in my opinion, Dr. Phil seems to have virtually zero tolerance for bad behavior in adults, I've seen him be downright disrespectful and just plain nasty toward guests who were on the show expecting help (not a verbal beatdown).  But adolescents usually always always tend to get the sugar-coated, "kiss on the cheek" treatment regardless.  I don't approve.

 

  

I'm sure Alex was already telling herself how bad she was. You don't go letting strange men wallow all over you if you have even a shred of self-respect. If a kiss on the cheek is being pulled out of your home and everything familiar and put into a school where everything you do is monitored and regulated, and you have little access to friends and family, then I guess that was a kiss on the cheek. How scary for any child! If forcing her to face that she's opening herself up to physical danger and AIDS is a kiss on the cheek, then I guess that was a kiss on the cheek.

 

The Aspen program is effective because it is compassionate but TOUGH! It's NOT a vacation. The old way was to punish these kids and tell them everything they're doing wrong. it was found that that didn't work because it only made them feel worse about themselves. Programs like Aspen work.

 

And actually, I think Dr. Phil had more tolerance for Kim, Jeanette and especially Enza than I would have!

 
April 2, 2007, 11:55 am CDT

03/26 The Dr. Phil House: Teen Intervention Follow-Up

Quote From: happycamper1

I'm glad Alex got the help she needed. She didn't need Dr. Phil telling her how bad she is. She already feels bad about herself. She needed to be told she was precious and that she CAN turn her life around. I worry about the peer pressure when she goes back to school, although I'm sure that as good as Aspen is they've dealt with her about that.

 

It seems as if the adults needed to go to sleep-away camp too. What a crew! I hope that if Jeanette moves out of Kim's house she will have the opportunity become more of a Grandma and find enjoyment in that. I know I couldn't live with my mother either.

 

Kim seems to be just sleep-walking through life. I think she means well, but she doesn't seem to know who she really is. It seems as if she could use some counseling to figure that out.

 

Enza! Enza, Enza, ENZA! Does she not have enough in her life that she has to try to run other people's lives too? I'm sure God thanks her everyday for all the help she gives Him. She probably doesn't think He can run the world without her either. I didn't see anything about HER children. Does she have any? Is she a perfect mother? She seems totally manipulative, at least from the clips we saw, and as if every word and movement she makes is for affect. Everything seems to be about HER, how SHE feels, how SHE wants Kim's household to run, how all the good stuff happened because of HER, and how SHE'S the hero. But she's totally blind as to HER part in the mess. How would she feel if someone came into her house and picked at everything she did, put her down to her family, and caused disruption? If she's the sister-in-law where is her husband? Doesn't he have the cajones to tell her to SHUT-UP? Or does she completely control him?

 

I agree that they all would be better off with Enza out of their lives, but I'm sure that when Alex goes home Enza will be back manipulating things again.

 

I understand that Dr. Phil's focus had to be Alex, but why wasn't a little more time spent on these adults? I would be very interested in hearing why Dr. Phil didn't come down harder on Enza, and help her see what she's doing. I think it was touched on, but it didn't seem as if she got it, and will be the same old destructive source at the next opportunity.

I agree.  I have noticed that the biggest complain with older women who live with their daughters is this issue of "no respect."

 

I think it's really that they don't understand teens.

 
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