Topic : 04/04 Did He or Didn't He?

I read some of what these people in this show said. What makes me sick is that the own mother of the child isn't sure if she believes this. You either believe your 5 year old or you dont. Maybe the child was coached into this cause a real mother that had her 5 year old tell her someone touched would believe the child, for there wouldn't be any other reason to not believe it. But I question the young man Steven JR. this kind of crime no one wants to admit they ever did it. They know they have done wrong not like stealing wrong, like sick wrong being ashamed of your self wrong. People just don't freely admit when they have done something like that. He also knows what will happen if he admits this. This is where its gets tricky you just dont know. I usually take the lead from what the mother thinks, if she really believes her child then I do believe the woman is right. But this woman says she could be wrong in believing her daughter. And I don't care what Dr Phil (even though I love his show) says little kids do not pull these thoughts out of thin air. Either they happend or someone told her to say this. It makes me very sad to see this. If that little girl is telling the truth, and really no one believes her what kind of trust is she going to have in people now. And sorry I think she has a bad mother, to stop taking her daughter into counselling cause it took too much of her time. Lady get with it, this is your daughter and your time is her time You don't have your life anymore. ITS YOUR CHILD. I would do anything for my son. There would be nothing that I would put above him. If I had to spend hours at a freakin' counselors office everyday to get him help I would be there with a book waiting around for him. I just don't understand these people that have children and then think that they don't have to do all these important things for there children. Its why we have alot of out of control kids. True its not always the parents fault, but we should think more about our children welfare then our own wants. I see it too much and it makes me sick.

*sorry for the bad spelling and grammer, I'm a little upset

MY DAUGHTER WAS SEXUALLY MOLESTED BY HER BROTHER (MY SON), IT STARTED WHEN SHE WAS 4 AND IT TOOK HER 2 YEARS TO TELL SOMEONE. I DIDN'T SEE ANY SIGNS THAT SOMETHING WASN'T RIGHT. MY SON WAS MORE MOODY AND DIDN'T WANT TO SPEND MUCH TIME AS A FAMILY. I THOUGHT THAT WAS BECAUSE HE WAS A TEENAGER. I WAS WRONG. I NEVER DOUBTED MY DAUGHTER AND MY SON DID CONFIRM SOME OF WHAT MY DAUGHTER TOLD DCFS. I HAVE AMAZING LITTLE GIRL, SHE WAS BRAVE AND TOLD SOMEONE. MY FAMILY HASN'T BEEN SUPPORTIVE. I HAVE LOST ALL MY FAMILY, (PARENTS, SISTER, ETC) BECAUSE I SUPPORTED MY DAUGHTER AND HAVE FOLLOWED THE ADVICE OF HER THERAPHIST. BUT I DIDN'T BRUSH IT UNDER THE RUG. I DIDN'T FORGET IT HAPPEN, I WILL NEVER FORGET. MY SON WAS NOT ABUSE AS A CHILD, HE IS ANGRY, SELF CENTER KID, THAT DIDN'T LIKE THAT HE WAS'T THE ONLY CHILD ANY MORE. IT HAS BLOWS MY MIND THAT MY FAMILY IS ONLY CONCERNED ABOUT MY SON AND HAS SHOWN NO CONCERN FOR HER, AND THE REASON I'M TOLD IS BECAUSE SHE IS YOUNG. I DON'T CARE HOW OLD THE CHILD IS, IT IS NEVER OK TO ABUSE A CHILD.

I will watch with open eyes and see what is said and not said..

As a SURVIOR of INCEST  our perceptions are more deeper than someone who has not been thru this....

I will come back and give a 100 percent fair statement!

I agree with you completely!!!   Things seem rather fishy about the mother though.  And really about this whole story.  But the child is the one anyone should be concerned about.  Not Steven, or the marriage or family.  If this really happened to her she needs all the love and support she can get not family bickering and pitty parties.  And even if this didn't happen to her, she is now involved in something that she might start to believe happened and still need counseling for that too. 

This family really need to change their focus either way!!!  Steven Jr needs to quit having a pitty party and move on with life!

You have a unique slant on this story.  I do think you're dealing with two separate things though.  First is whether or not the man did touch the child improperly.  I saw no evidence that he had and a surprising amount that he had not.  Yet, he will live the rest of his life with this stigma.  The mother should be prosecuted.

Second is the mother and the little girl.  I see well what you mean.  It is almost as if the child is secondary to the mother.  How could she stop the counseling? 

I do agree with Dr. Phil regarding the kinds of things a child that age is capable of saying.  The concept had probably been introduced to her by the mother as she warned the child of adults doing things they shouldn't.  As an example, let me tell you this.

My sister was such a model parent that she and her husband were featured in an article about being parents of the year.  One son, then age three, was walking with my brother in law in a supermarket soon afterward.  Out of the blue (and when a crowd as around, of course) my nephew said very loudly"...I'll be good!  Please don't beat me again!"  Of course my brother in law had never even spanked him.  That didn't keep him from coming up with the phrase though.

You sound as if you would or are a great mother.  How on to your principles and don't be surprised by what kids will say. 

Your personal story is a sad and tragic one that I have no trouble believing.  It's no wonder you used half your post to relate it.  I simply ask you this.  Do you think a person accused of abusing a child is automatically guilty?  I honestly saw no shred of evidence to back this up.  Regardless of which "side" you believe, we do have things like courts, laws, judges and juries for a reason.  In this case, there was not shred one that would have put this case before a court. 

Please don't let your victimization lead you to victimizing others by stripping them of a fair trial.  What your parents did was wrong beyond words.  Their judgment will come.

Not to mention it mocks real sex abuse victims. AND it makes REAL abuse that much harder to detect, and to deal with. Kids who are REALLY being abused will then be treated like liars.

ITA