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Topic : 04/12 Twin Tug of War

Number of Replies: 849
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Created on : Friday, April 06, 2007, 11:39:40 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Allison Quets made headlines around the world when she allegedly kidnapped her 17-month-old twins across the border into Canada this past Christmas. She had given them up for adoption, but did she do so under duress? She now says she suffered from a pregnancy disease called hyperemesis that left her malnourished and sleep deprived to the point of complete exhaustion. See an exclusive interview with Allison from behind bars where she awaits trial on two counts of international parental kidnapping, with a possible sentence of three years behind bars. Then, look inside the life of a woman who is only three-and-a-half months pregnant and so sick with hyperemesis she spends most of her day on the bathroom floor. Plus, find out what all women need to know about hyperemesis: How you get it, how to know you have it, and whether it could kill you or your unborn child. Join the discussion.

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April 8, 2007, 10:41 am CDT

Set Allison Free

I'm very happy to see that Dr. Phil is doing a show on Allison. I do hope it's favourable to her cause of getting her kids back with her where they belong. I had the pleasure of meeting Allison when she was arrested here in Ottawa and later let out on bail. She is a loving mother and just a really nice person who's been the victim of terrible events beginning with this debilitating illness. She does not deserve to be in jail. Any mother knows what lengths she would go to in order to save her children and Allison just did what most of us would do in the same circumstances. That a mother can be charged with kidnapping and kept in jail without bail simply for wanting desperately to keep her kids is a travesty of justice. I hope Dr. Phil will use his vast influence to help correct what was done to Allison. Nothing short of being set free and reunited with her children will do.
 
April 8, 2007, 2:54 pm CDT

Looking forward to this show

My name is Jennifer and I am 25yrs old.  I have one daughter, who is 4yrs old, and I suffered from severe when pregnant with her.  I was lucky enough to have a great and caring team of Drs.  The HG started at exactly 6wks, and really continued throughout the entire 9 months. (I was able to control it with medication, but if I missed just one dose, I was again hugging the toilet!!)  At first the Drs were really stumped at first as to what was going on, but they didnt let that stop them.  They first ruled out a muiltiple pregnancy- which it wasn't, and from there it was just trial and error with different medications.  They tried the usual Reglan and Phenergan and both made me vomit within 5 minutes of taking it.    I was in and out of the ER many times for dehydration and was finally admitted to the hospital at 12 weeks because I could not keep even a sip of water down- in fact, I had stopped eating and drinking and was STILL contnuing to vomit 4-6 times a day, somtimes more!  When they admitted me to the hospital, I had already lost a total of 25lbs!  I was eventually given and PICC line (which the Dr putting it in made me feel so confident in him when he said "Oh, I have never given a pregnant woman a PICC line!!!  and the nurses on the Labor and Delivery floor would come in and tell me "Oh, I haven't seen a PICC line since nursing school 10yrs ago!!- gee thanks!0  Anyhow, after two weeks in the hosptial, a PICC line and being hooked to a TPN for 12 hours  anight, I was able to go home.  I then had home health coming in for a total of 6 weeks- to help with the PICC line and TPN.  I was finally able to go off the TPN and PICC line at about 20/21 weeks and from there on out- I only made it through with my miracle drug- ZOFRAN!!!  Zofran was still a rather new drug at the time, and I will never forget the first time I had to get it filled in the pharmacy.  I dropped off my script and we decided to wait for it.  A little while later, the pharmacist calls me over and says "Are you sure you are supposed to be taking this when you are pregnant?  This is usually only prescribed for cancer patients!!"  I smiled, and said YES- now fill it PLEASE!!!  Little did he ror I know how much a of a lifeline it would become.

 

At the time no one around me understood what was going on.  Both my sisters in law thought I was just overexaggeraing- telling me "If you cant handle a little bit of morning sickness, how do you expect to be a mother?!"  I tried to tell them it was NOT just ms, but it was HG instead- but they just didn't get it. 

 

Like another poster said, there are still certain smells that cause me to want to vomit.  Since being pregnant 5 yrs ago, I have not eaten applesauce, pears, beef stew or drank lemonade!  It just all brings back horrible horrible memories! :(

 

I am looking forward to this show, and hopefully it will help raise the awareness of HG!!

 

 

 
April 8, 2007, 3:02 pm CDT

Sharing the pain of HG post-partem effects

I too have survived HG twice. I love my children with all of my being, but can relate to having lapsed judgement from time to time due to the relentlessness of my illness. No one can understand a woman's heartache, physical and mental anguish, and actual torment that HG can cause, unless you have endured it.

 

Yes, Allison made a very bad decision when she violated her visitation guidelines... BUT she should have never lost her children and should have never been forced into giving them up for adoption. She needed love, support, and help in all manners during the pregnancy and afterwards. She should not be deemed a criminal, but should be granted the help that she needs to recover from her illness (physically and mentally).

 

I really feel for her children. I pray that they will know their mother throughout their childhood and that she will have the opportunity to share life with them. I pray that they will know their mother's intent and heart in this matter and others.

 

I am so thankful that Dr. Phil is addressing HG. Too many of us have suffered without the support that we need. So many in our society simply don't understand the impact this disease has on our lives. Thank you Dr. Phil.

 

And to those who have also survived HG... I will be watching the show with all of you. I suspect I will be crying the whole time. As this day approaches, I have been reliving much of the pain my family and I have endured through our pregnancies and life with HG. I'm prepared and ready to see the show, and will continue to pray for all involved with this show and for those who have or are currently suffering from HG. Blessings to all of you. You are angels.

 
April 8, 2007, 9:11 pm CDT

04/11 Twin Tug of War

Eighteen years ago when I was pregnant with my daughter, I think I was throwing up from the moment of CONCEPTION, my Doctor said it would pass, yeah right, I spent most of that pregnancy in the Hospital, and was almost airlifted to another province because the province I lived in couldn't deal with me ( pre-term labor, dehydration, low blood pressure etc, etc. )  Well we got to 38 weeks, I was flat on my back fro 26 weeks on, and still everyone told me, this will pass.

Smells made me sick, the look of food made me sick, I was so weak I couldn't move half the time.

I had a son at 16, wonderful pregnancy, to be honest I wasn't sick at all, uncommon for someone so young, but it was easy, my second son two years after my daughter (their B-days are only a day apart ) was another easy pregnancy, no problems.

The only diagnosis I had was morning sickness, hell I didn't think it was supposed to last all day, or occur evertime I ate or smelled something strange, I think by the end of that pregnancy I would've agreed to anything in that state, recovery was a nightmare because we need food and water to survive, and if you're not getting enough while you're pregnant your recovery won't be easy either, so then the post partum depression, compounded with nursing problems, and bleeding, we both survived, I can understand how she could be coerced into giving up her babies.

Personally I think NOTHING should be signed or agreed to until time has passed after recovery from the birth, especially if the Mother has been sick during the pregnancy, she needs time to get her own head straight and her body recovered enough to make a concious decision.

 
April 9, 2007, 5:38 am CDT

Angelina was worth every painful second of HG

Doctor Phil,

Thank you for making a show about us girls! My story is still very fresh for me and my family. Angelina was born March 3rd 2007.

I have been with child four times before my little girl was born. I got very sick three times and had been told to stop with the baby by doctors. I followed their orders.
With my 4th I did not get sick at all but lost it to MC at 9 weeks. So when my loving man and I wanted to have a baby I told him about my past and said now if I do try you must understand that unlike his xwife I would get real bad morring sickness. Since I had in the past. I did not know about HG I just knew how sick I have been. No clue how long it would last or if I would even 100% get sick this time. He said he could deal with some morring sickness and we tried to get preggo.

Durring this time we moved from Pennsylvania to Alabama for his job. About a week into moving I started to feel bad in the morrings. The 3rd day of feeling bad came the first puke. I was like ohh man I am preggo I have to be. So I got a test it said I was not. "Humm too soon??" I thought "Yes" about 4 days latter I took a second test and was positive.
I called him in and said look what you did to me LOL. We both had a good giggle about it. The first two weeks I puked maybe three or so times a day. I did not mind it. I would cook for my two stepsons and run to the bathroom and puke. Thinking I can handle this. At this time I could handle keeping down water and crackers. Played the game of trying toast in the morrings and 7up. Still sick but happy about my baby.
Now I am three weeks preggo and Steve's work needs to send him to a training school in TX for two weeks. Normal thing with his job to have to go to schools off and on. I packed his bag and sent him off with a kiss. Now the real HG hell kicks in for me. Now water 7up and toast is not working. Heck if I put water on my toung I would puke. By day two of him being in school I was stuck in bed. I would drag myself to the kitchen with the trash bucket draging behind me. I would set on a bar stool and puke into the trash as I cooked for my 5 and 8 year olds. I would leave them in the playroom as I cooked so they did not see me doing this. I would plate up the food put it on the table and call them to eat as I crawed back into bed. This was July so no school so it was just them and me all day. I have to amit they ate a lot of soup and lunchmeat them two weeks. Steve would call at night after school and I would put my best face on and tell him oh I feel a bit bad but am ok. Did not want to worry him. I had not ate since the day before he left and did not eat them whole two weeks. The day before he came home he calls me and I sound like a druggie can not understand me and I can not keep on topic. He tells me something is way wrong with me. I cry and amit to some of issues the puking and not eating.
He calls a friend who comes and picks me up to take me to the ER and watch my boys as I see the doctor. I lost 35 pounds in two weeks. Mark said to me when he picked me up I looked real real sick. You could see the bones in my neck. I was not a skinny girl before HG so for him to see that on me ment some real bad juju was going on inside of me.
I go in looking like death and they tell me I need to make myself eat and drink for the baby. Guilt triping me into eating. Like I wanted to not eat and drink for two weeks for shits and giggles. Ugh my first of many doctors/nurses giving me guilt for being sick. They give me 4 bags of IV's and a scrip for Phenergen.
Phenergen gave me the runs and did not help me other then making me ill from both ends. Ugh.

Less then two weeks latter I was still not keeping down water or food and went back to the ER yet again. More IV's more Phenergen. Did not keep me just toped me off and sent me on my way.
Week latter I start bleeding very bad and we rush to the ER thinking I am loosing the baby. First they thought I was then they thought I was not. So this smaller hub hospital did not know what to do with me so they transport me to the bigger hospital in the next town over. This is when I get to meet my OBGYN doctor for the first time. I had an appt to see him at my 10 week mark but ended up in the OB ward days before that appt. He tells the nurse I have hyperemesis gravidarum and puts me on IV zofran. I was bleeding from puking so hard. They put the doplar on me and I hear Angelina's heartbeat for the first time. I layed there with tears in my eyes it was all so real to me after that. Not just thinking about myself and how sick I am but that there is a real baby in there cooking for me. I was kept overnight and sent home with my lifesaver a scrip for zofran OTC 8mg every 6 hours. With in a day I was eating small meals and able to drink room temp water. You would have thought that soup and water was steak and fine wine the way I enjoyed that first meal. The rest of my PG I would still only be able to eat small meals but it was better then no food at all.


Feeling better I set down and look on the net for hyperemesis gravidarum to see what he was talking about. That is when I found this fourm. I start reading the front end of this page and started to feel better about this not being something only I was going thru. I would read a bit and tell Steve what I had read. I think it also helped him cope with me. I know it was hard on him watching me be so sick. I would feel better about three weeks in a row and would get ill again. You could almost time when I would have to go back into the ER. I got the flu two times since my body was so broke down. I was sick or on meds till 35 weeks.
Then came the preterm labor and 1/2 bedrest from 35 to 38 weeks. My doctor let me have her at 38 weeks when I lost 6 pounds. We have a perfect baby girl who came out 6 lb 14oz and is 19 inch long. With me only gaining 19 pounds all durring my 3rd tri.
Steve was so good to me all durring HG even at times when it was putting a lot of stress on him. I could not ask for him to have been any better to me.
HG took almost 9mo of my life from me and my family but my baby girl is worth it. Putting out my story in type is making me feel much better as I set here working out the last 9mo in my head. Thanks for reading this and going thru it with me once again.


I have to thank all the girls on here for listening to me wine and cry durring my bad times. I hope now HG free I can help support others who are still in what we call HG hell.


Samantha Kay Espen-Peters
 
April 9, 2007, 6:10 am CDT

I read your profile.God bless you.

Quote From: jendavidson

Hi

 

My name is Jenny, and I was honored to be present for the taping of this show. I am an active member and moderator of a forum for women suffering from and supporting others with Hyperemesis. You can find us at http://forums.helpher.org/index.php .

 

My heart aches for Alison and for all women who have endured HG, it is a horrendous disease that completely takes over your life. I have been pregnant 7 times, I have four living sons, and four babies in Heaven. You can read more about that in my profile.

 

I am anxious to see how this segment is received.

I had never heard of Hyperemesis. I looked it up just to see if I could find some information about it. It said that it is rare. More African-Americans have it than Caucasions. Is that pretty much true? There was a lot of information about treatments. I didn't have it with my 2 pregnancies. I'm just interested in knowing about it. It has got to be a devastating illness. I wonder if the mother of the twins was treated unfairly? This illness certainly need to be discussed.
 
April 9, 2007, 7:56 am CDT

Thank you for helping Allison....

I have already posted my story, so now want to go on to post my support for Allison. I had an open blog set up to discuss the Journey of Hope for HG run that contained a link to sign Allisons petition. It started to become a bit of a posting ground for the Allison Quets story and I did have correspondence with Allison's attorney. I removed the comments about the case as I wanted the site to be about the walk and HG. But I ABSOLUTELY SUPPORT ALLISON and my heart shatters to see the pain in her eyes here. Please write to her everyone. She needs to feel support from the outside world I'm sure. I am taking the day off to watch Dr. Phil on Wednesday and I know I will be an absolute mess. I am so so sorry Allison that you had to suffer with HG as I have, and THEN have to deal with this. There are no words.

We will run for you. I will fill my brain with your image in my mind if I get to a point where I think I can't make it, and know without a doubt that what I have and am experiencing is a pale pale pale comparison to your pain.

 
April 9, 2007, 11:24 am CDT

04/11 Twin Tug of War

I wanted to take a moment and tell my story with hyperemesis. I have five children and had hyperemesis with every one. Most pregnancies I had hyperemesis the whole nine months. I am not an advocate for abortion, and was horrified that I even considered it, with each pregnancy. It scared me to death! I thought I was going to die and the only way I could stay alive would be to abort my baby. It was not until my fifth pregnancy that I understood that these feelings were a part of the horrible disease I had. It was not me!  I was lucky to be able to walk from my bed to the bathroom. I was the main breadwinner in the family, and we often found ourselves in serious money problems due to the fact I could not work. When I did go to work, I was always counseled for not being fast enough, not being there, and not doing a good job. I was told that others were pregnant and working and doing fine, so why couldn't I? I had a few nurses tell me that I had to realize when I was pregnant, I had to accept that there would be days I did not feel well. I had friends talk about how terrible they felt in their pregnancies, but they would never take medication because it was too dangerous for the baby. With tears in my eyes, I knew that I had to have the medication because I would die without it. I was unable to drink or eat anything. Oftentimes my husband would beg me to just eat something. I couldn't. 

 

I still have many food aversions, and not just one or two, but several! I still cannot drink water, it makes me throw up. I cannot watch someone throw up or I revert back to those horrible days when I was pregnant. When my kids get sick, my husband has to take care of them if they vomit. I am a nurse and cannot handle it when patients vomit. I try, but it is hard. I have learned, though, to not judge what my patients are going through. I am a better nurse because of what I went through. I would not wish it on anyone, but it has helped me to be a stronger person. I try with all my might to get the word out to nursing students (whom I teach) about hyperemesis and how to treat those with it. I am a part of the mother's forum for HER for that is where I have my greatest friends! They helped me with this last pregnancy. And so now it is my turn to help others.

 

Thank you so much for doing this show. The word needs to get out! Thanks again!

 
April 9, 2007, 12:36 pm CDT

Thank you Dr. Phil, I too am a survivor

I would like to start off by saying thank you for doing a special on this disease. It is so important for people to realize what this disease is, and to know that if someone is experiencing symptoms of HG, talk to your doctor and make sure he/she listens.

 

Then I would like to tell all of those wondering about HG that it is the hardest thing I can imagine someone going through. Those in my family who have suffered from cancers and other horrible illnesses have told me that at least they had a reprieve here and there, though those with HG have none.  It is a horrible disease, and there are times that you don't know if it will be worth it. It affects you physically, emotionally, and financially.

 

I have had two HG pregnancies, with the first being what is called MILD - though to anyone with a normal pregnancy even that is horrible.  The next pregnancy, I had Severe HG, which I don't think there is any way to fully describe.  The support system I had was better than I could have asked for and was probably the most important thing for dealing with HG. There is no way for me to even imagine what I would have done without these wonderful people.  I know that I could not have fought so hard and survived without them.  I too was unable to care for my child while pregnant.  Half of the time I was on so many medications and so sick I didn't even realize I was slowly dying, though everyone around me did.  All my preconceived notions of motherhood went down the drain. Around the 7th month I'd started to lose myself to the disease. I was in the hospital for another stay and begging my doctor daily to figure something out, induce me, anything. I cried daily, but at the same time wanted to stay strong for everyone around me so I tried to hide how hard it was. I begged my doctor to induce me daily, even calling her at home. Of course there was no doctor who could do such a thing at that point in the pregnancy, so I started receiving steroid shots and having amino's until we would know that the baby's lungs were developed. I would count down until it was time for another, and then feel crushed when it wasn't time yet. My family was getting more scared by the day that I was just going to give out and they would lose us both. Luckily, even though we had a few VERY close calls, both me and my baby were able to survive. 

 

Financially, many insurances don't cover medications since they are not deemed medically safe for pregnancy.  The costs run well over $500 a day in many cases.  Many people can't afford the medications to treat them, so what are they to do?

 

Thank you Dr. Phil.  Due to you running this special, I have shared my story, and through friends and family forwarding it on I have been able to help women who have just been diagnosed with this disease.  It has helped me to heal, and to come to terms with my grief of not being able to have more children, and my guilt of not being there for my daughter while I went through the last pregnancy.

 

 
April 9, 2007, 4:43 pm CDT

My heart and love for those suffering mothers

I had the most horrible and traumatizing time of my life when I got hiperemesis. People need to understand this condition and the debilitating effects that cause. Womens with hiperemesis need support and help from their loved ones. Im happy because Dr. Phil it's a great professional, and I know he will deal with this topic with the respect that deserves. Thanks for show this reality to America!
 
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