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Topic : 08/20 The Dr. Phil House: Saving Grace, Part 2

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Created on : Friday, April 13, 2007, 03:09:57 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 04/16/07) Dr. Phil continues his work with a family torn apart by a 6-year-old girl’s secret: she was molested by her grandfather, and her grandmother failed to report it. Cat and Todd have cut off all contact with Todd’s parents, Steve and Anne, and haven’t seen them since they learned the horrifying truth from their daughter, Grace, over two years ago. Steve has served time for the assault and is now a registered sex offender with a protective order keeping him away from Grace until she’s 18. After secretly watching Dr. Phil’s interview with Steve and Anne, and learning the details of what really took place, will Todd and Cat ever feel comfortable with letting Grace’s grandmother back in her life? Dr. Phil sits down with both couples as they confront each other for the first time face to face. Then, Dr. Phil addresses Cat and Todd’s marriage, which has started to crumble under the stress. How can they get back on track for the sake of their daughter? Next, Grace wants to ask Dr. Phil some questions. See what this brave little girl wants other kids to know. Plus, Dr. Phil has an update on this family one month later. How are they now? Talk about the show here.

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August 21, 2007, 12:34 pm CDT

Knowing how Gracie felt at a time of need....

I can feel how Gracie must have felt when she opened up to her grandmother and her grandmother just dismissed it. Time goes by and you look at grandma and she looks at you (with eyes that say "it's our little secret so just let it go") and you want to say "How come you didnt do anything?" and you know nothing is being done about it. You wonder why they just let it go. You wonder if you reveal anything else to anybody if it is just a waste of time because you feel you will get the same result.  Nothing!!  It takes alot of courage for a child to tell a person (harder to tell a family member) that a family member has sexually abused you. I was sexually abused by my oldest brother for about 7 years. I know I had to be younger than 3 when it first started, but when I could think for myself, I was able to tell my mother. My mother knew what was going on for years.  My mother said I was lying and that I should shut up. She dismissed the sexual abuse.  She knew it was going on but she just turned the other way. Year after year I was abused. Finally I was taken out by Family Services.  I was a Crown Ward for a Provincial Family Agency and I finally built up the courage to tell my social worker and she put it in her report that I was "making up tall stories again" (is how I think I read it in my personal file at the Family Agency just a few years ago. I felt I needed to go and review my child case files). The agency kept putting me back into the family household.  I dont blame the agency but I do blame the social worker for not taking me seriously.  Anytime children disclose information like that, it should be taken seriously and something should be done immediately.  Thinking back all those years, I just wonder how many other children received the exact same attention (or lack of it). Sometimes I feel like writing the agency and informing them of what had happened in my case, however I feel that the letter I send would be just dismissed and I would just end up feeling like I was ignored again.  Well, life goes on. I am still considering on advising the Family Agency as it just might make the difference in even one child's life. Gracie has wonderful supportive parents. Her mother is the stronger parent in this case.  She is much more supportive and very protective (much like I was when I was growing up...protective of my one and only daughter).  I think Gracie's Dad has a disoriented outlook on the whole situation. I dont understand why he could not feel his own daughter's pain?? Yet he wept for his father the monster??  He doesn't seem to be very connected when it comes to providing emotional support for his child or his wife....???  Gracie is a strong girl and she is a survivor!!!!
 
August 21, 2007, 12:41 pm CDT

08/20 The Dr. Phil House: Saving Grace, Part 2

Quote From: cookiecat68

When the parents of Grace and even Dr. Phil were telling this Grandfather and Grandmother off for the molestation of his Granddaughter I can think of a point of view from the victim that was not mentioned. If the Grandfather were allowed back into Graces life, just think how Grace would feel if at every holiday dinner, family reunion and Halloween celebration, she had to sit across the table from her molester and share a meal? This should be a happy and fun time for a child, not a time filled with stress, fear and bad memories. Also, after Grace is a grown woman with a husband of her own, ask her husband just how much he would enjoy sitting across the table eating dinner with the man who raped his wife? Merry Christmas my be-hind! Please Dr. Phil do not allow this man back into this child's life. Maybe one day the Grandmother could visit Grace at the home of her son only. Has Graces father ever thought about how different his life would have been had he been a girl? I do not believe that all of a sudden just out of the blue this man suddenly started having inappropriate feels for little girls, I suspect he has always had this tendency. Graces Mother deserves a gold medal for protecting her helpless young child. God bless the child and God bless the very strong Mama!

This story has provoked many feelings, including anger.  The timing of this show coinsides with my own issues of sexual abuse.  I sat across from my abusers (father,grandfather, brother in law..) year after year.  When I married I expected my husband to do the same,  after all don't all families pretend life is ok? Many times I tried to get it out in the open, no one wanted to hear.  Now I'm told just to get over it.  I tried for years to act as if nothing happened.  Meanwhile, I chose other destructive paths to deal with my pain.  I wanted to be loved and accepted by my family that I tried so hard to fit in.  Today I see my growth, as I no longer want or need their acceptance or approval, at least I want to heal. 

 

 Another family issue brought up some painful history and at this my husband  put his foot down and said NO MORE and stood up for me -- what a concept, and I got mad at him for blaming my family. Long story short, it took me a long time but I have separated from most of my family and  now have hope of healing.  It has been and continues to be such a process that I'm ashamed that I still carry this crap around.  My marriage suffers because I don't know how to be intimate without sex. My husband is grateful now that Im aware and am trying.

 

 I am so sad for Grace -- but it also helped me to see that I was once that little girl and as I don't blame her -- why should I blame myself? 

 

It took courage for the Mother and Grace to air this to the public -- I pray that brings healing and can reach others who have similar issues.  When bad stuff happens sometimes all we can do after processing is share with others and hope someone can be helped by our experiences.

 
August 21, 2007, 1:12 pm CDT

Physco Grandparents

This whole situation is sad.  I feel sorry for everyone involved.  I feel bad for Steve, his wife, parents and of course Grace.  There are many reasons I feel sad about the whole situation.   First of all, poor sick Steve.  I think this was his way of getting back at Grace's parents.  For some reason, I feel that he wanted to hurt Grace's parents and have a child that is totally "in awe with him."  The reason for this is basically taking advantage of a young child who has not experienced what is right and wrong in life sexually.  Second of all I feel that Steve's wife, poor women was scared and didn't know what to do.  I think she was afraid of loosing her husband if she said anything and was probably blinded by the saying "stand by your man."

Thirdly, the parents of Grace have a road ahead of them faced with challenges.  I think this is the "test of being a good parent."  Now faced with a bad situation, making it better.  It can be forever in her mind but something that can also be something to refer to and become a stronger, wiser, happy and have a successful childhood.  This of course, is partly the parents challenge.

 

The most important thing I saved for last.  I really think that sex offenders of any type shouldn't go to jail(waste of taxpayers money) or go for therapy.  I think society is better off without and since they really shouldn't be let back in society there is only one such place for them.  Have a designated airplane pick em up, take them to an island(not a paradise one) and have them fend for themself until they die.  Since this is not legal then I think the court should not allow Grace to see Steve until 30 and only talk to him via phone at  age 18.  The only reason I think that any type of communication should go on is so there won't be any further trauma when the grandparents die.  At least when the grandparents die Grace and her family knowed they tried. 

 
August 21, 2007, 1:49 pm CDT

08/20 The Dr. Phil House: Saving Grace, Part 2

I watched with horror, last nights showing of  "Saving Grace." Those grandparents are beyond belief; yet not because my family was much like them. Several times over summer vacations, my great-grandfather molested me and also every one of his female progeny. 

 

He was always treated as the respected patriarch and his behavior was brushed off ("Papa just can't keep his hands off anyone.") When he was visiting our family the winter of 1963, I came home from school and was alone with him. He began to fondle me, I ran away, locked myself in the bathroom and prayed.

 

When I heard my mother's car in the driveway, I ran out as he grabbed and tried to detain me. When I told my mother what happened, she said "You know, he did that to me, but I never dreamed he would bother you." Then he had dinner with us that evening.

 

Grace's father's family is in deep trouble and live in denial that I think will never heal. Not many seemed to understand Todd's response to this whole horrid thing, but I do. What I cannot understand, is the grandmother who sat and held her husbands hand, the same one that penetrated his baby granddaughters vagina as he ejaculated.

 

There are no good answers here, but with Dr. Phil's intervention there will be a conclusion of some kind.

 

It is my opinion that some things so egregious they cannot be undone and forever preclude the right of one person to have any contact with another. Those grandparents should be forever banned from Grace's life. 

 

I am taking the liberty of including a poem I wrote and dedicated to my great-grandfather, H.P. Covey:

 

    PERDITION'S INTEGRITY

 

  Deceit was in your plan, old man,

  deceit was in your plan.

 

  a patriarch who did remand

  his progeny to stolen land

  to suffer evil's greedy hand

 

  We suffered evil's hand, old man,

  we suffered evil's hand.

 

  six generations now have spanned

  the continent from strand to strand

  we tell the truth that he had banned

 

  The truth you tried to ban, old man

  the truth you tried to ban.

 

  but blood he spilled on silver sand

  has covered all he thought was grand

  and points him to forever's damned

 

  Go join forevers' damned, old man

  go join forevers' damned.

 

           

Thanks. I feel better now.

 

              

 

  

 
August 21, 2007, 2:56 pm CDT

08/20 The Dr. Phil House: Saving Grace, Part 2

  In watching your show on "Saving Grace", I was a little annoyed if not for a better word how the grandparents acted.  It really seems to me like the grandfather , the molester, still has not really completely understand what a horrible and sick thing he did.  Seems to me like he really needs alot of mental help and counceling.  Sad to say but I think that bond with the grandchildren has been forever broken and I don't feel he should have the grandchildren around him until they are 18 and can decide that for themselves.  This is horrible.  Grandparents are suppose to be such a blessing to their grandkids.  It's sad that they will not be able to have the extention of the family on that side to grow up with and share with. 

  I wonder if the kids are close enough where they can spend time with the mothers parents so they can still get that granparent kind of love and support.

  The grandmother seems to  be unable to understand as well, it looks like she is trying to but I think she is still in some kind of shock and unbelief and doesnt know just what to say or do.  I feel so sad for her. 

  As far as the relationship with the parents, I didnt quite understand about what they said about living in an unloving marriage for years.  How very sad.  It seems to me that the husband "Todd" really loves his family and does love his wife.  He seems to be a very nice man.  I feel so bad for him, having to face that facat his dad has done this and then to think his marriage is not of love.  My hearat goes out to them both.  I hope they do try to see if the marriage can work and love can be found.

  For Grace...............oh may the lord keep her and bless her and give her His peace.  May she grow up to be a very happy, fullfilled, and wonderous child full of life and love and may she have unconditional love from her mom and dad . 

God keep all in this situation.

 
August 21, 2007, 4:07 pm CDT

Typical behavior of a pedophile

Grandpa's attitude is typical of a pedophile and so is his wife's. It's disturbing, sad and infuriating. I listened to his claim that the devil made him do it, it was his way of not taking responsibility for his actions. HE WANTED TO DO IT...HE DID IT....IT'S PURELY HIS FAULT...not the devil's. He's evil and sick and doesn't deserve to have little Grace in his life. What he does deserve is to be branded as a pervert and a pedophile everywhere he goes so people will be able to protect their children against this predator. 8 months in jail was not enough, he clearly hasn't learned his lesson because he has yet to take responsibility. Grandma doesn't deserve a relationship with Grace either. After this child told her what happened to her at the hands of her grandfather she should have called Grace's parents first and the police second. Grace should have been her main concern and not protecting her husband and doing damage control. I can't help but believe she was willing to sacrifice Grace so her image and reputation would not be ruined. She even wanted the children to visit again and said she was going to protect Grace from her husband. How do you think Grace would have felt just being in the same house with the man who had done this to her? How do you think Grace's life would have turned out had she kept this a secret all her life? It would also have been impossible for grandma to have protected Grace all the time and Grandpa admitted he would have abused her again, so Grandma is as much as a problem as grandpa in that she is an enabler. I just wish there could have been criminal charges against her too.

As for Grace's parents, I think they are doing a wonderful job with Grace and I think in the long run Grace will have the best possible outcome to all of this. I was encouraged to hear they are getting help to work out their marriage issues, it would be tragic if this ordeal cost them their marriage too. From what I saw, Grace is a wonderful child with the heart of a survivor. One day I hope she can write a book to help other little children who have gone threw the same thing she has.

Thanks Dr. Phil for tackling this issue, it's not talked about enough.

 

 
August 21, 2007, 4:28 pm CDT

Don't wait to close the barn after the horse . . .

Quote From: philfan004

    I believe resolution is possible. Let me tell you why. And I also believe resolution is very, very important for all concerned, including little Gracie. But first, the possibility.

 

    And, even before we start, I would be clear that safeguards, including supervision at any time Grandpa is near his granddaughter, is appropriate. Nor have I heard Grandpa ever suggest that he would resent such restrictions. I believe he understands.

 

    But, as to the possibility of resolution: Not only do we need to listen to what Grandpa says, but have we noticed what he HASNT said? One statement I havent heard, and I think it is significant, is, I deserve or By now Ive earned or After all, I am her grandpa--nothing he says smacks of entitlement. He consistently asks for mercy, but never indicates that he has any other grounds for reconciliation. He has never said that his prison term is in any way payment or entitles him to anything. I see that as a good sign. Hes thinking clearly if he recognizes that he has no claim to rights. Indeed, he can only ask for mercy. And nothing more.

 

    But not only is resolution possible, I believe, but it is also very important. And on this account Id like to speak from experience. But first, let me say that I use the word resolution. Many who have posted here seem to feel reformation is not possible. And Im not here to argue that Grandpa would never repeat--if his whole world suddenly caved in: his house burned down, someone stole all their savings, his entire family was in a bad accident and all in intensive care, ALL in one week.

 

    But I would like to say that, FOR GRACIES SAKE as well as everyone else, an amicable resolution IS IN HER BEST INTEREST. And I say this for the following reason: My wife, too, was molested by her own father. I dont probe, but Im gonna guess it was over a period of perhaps some years. The scars are deep. The gentleman did experience a religious conversion and some dramatic changes before his passing at the age of 42 but, regrettably, he was never able to face my wife and bring closure to this awful chapter in her life.

 

    And so, now, not only does she bear the scars, but I, too, suffer because of his misdeeds. My dear wife is a very frigid woman--were down to 3- or 4-times-a-year of lovemaking due to the damage he inflicted. I know in my heart that he died ashamed through-and-through of what hed done. How nice if only hed have had the courage (that Grandpa has shown) to have faced his victim, named the hideous crime, and said, I am so deeply sorry. It was all my fault; never yours.

 

    Gracie has the opportunity that my wife was never given. I hope she will be encouraged to seize the opportunity for reconciliation--now that Grandpas actions have been clearly demonstrated to be A CRIME worthy of prison-time, and he has shown that he truly values her to the point that he will be a  F.O.O.L. on national television because he truly values her. NO JOKER is going to go to those lengths so he can have another fling with a six-year-old. NONE. (Remember, he can never go in a grocery store, a barber shop, to Wal-Mart without knowing that any number of people there recognize his face. He does wear "the scarlet A" !)

 

    Despite all my love to her, I sense that my wife still wrestles with an old issue after all these years: Do I dare trust a man again? I wish better things for Gracie. And her husband.

 

 

    However the situation turns out in these families, I think we would do well to learn the important lesson of preparing our children before an incident like this has opportunity to take place. We talk to our children about never getting into a vehicle with a stranger--and without doubt that bit of advice prepared many youngsters and saved many a heartache.

 

   From this story might we do well to also  include  a  talk  preparing  youngsters  what  to  do  if   anyone  takes  it  upon  themselves  to  touch/expose  the  child.  The talk need not linger on the subject of friends, even relatives, molesting them. (Certainly DON'T plant specific ideas, like "Now if your Daddy ever . . ." or "If your brother ever . . . ." But a talk that  EMPOWERS  the child to know exactly what to do, where to go, how to respond could have empowered little Gracie--and all the other children--to have a plan already in place and not have to make those decisions completely unprepared.

 

    And to be prepared won't do her any harm later, when she starts dating, either.

 
August 21, 2007, 5:52 pm CDT

08/20 The Dr. Phil House: Saving Grace, Part 2

Quote From: philfan004

    I believe resolution is possible. Let me tell you why. And I also believe resolution is very, very important for all concerned, including little Gracie. But first, the possibility.

 

    And, even before we start, I would be clear that safeguards, including supervision at any time Grandpa is near his granddaughter, is appropriate. Nor have I heard Grandpa ever suggest that he would resent such restrictions. I believe he understands.

 

    But, as to the possibility of resolution: Not only do we need to listen to what Grandpa says, but have we noticed what he HASNT said? One statement I havent heard, and I think it is significant, is, I deserve or By now Ive earned or After all, I am her grandpa--nothing he says smacks of entitlement. He consistently asks for mercy, but never indicates that he has any other grounds for reconciliation. He has never said that his prison term is in any way payment or entitles him to anything. I see that as a good sign. Hes thinking clearly if he recognizes that he has no claim to rights. Indeed, he can only ask for mercy. And nothing more.

 

    But not only is resolution possible, I believe, but it is also very important. And on this account Id like to speak from experience. But first, let me say that I use the word resolution. Many who have posted here seem to feel reformation is not possible. And Im not here to argue that Grandpa would never repeat--if his whole world suddenly caved in: his house burned down, someone stole all their savings, his entire family was in a bad accident and all in intensive care, ALL in one week.

 

    But I would like to say that, FOR GRACIES SAKE as well as everyone else, an amicable resolution IS IN HER BEST INTEREST. And I say this for the following reason: My wife, too, was molested by her own father. I dont probe, but Im gonna guess it was over a period of perhaps some years. The scars are deep. The gentleman did experience a religious conversion and some dramatic changes before his passing at the age of 42 but, regrettably, he was never able to face my wife and bring closure to this awful chapter in her life.

 

    And so, now, not only does she bear the scars, but I, too, suffer because of his misdeeds. My dear wife is a very frigid woman--were down to 3- or 4-times-a-year of lovemaking due to the damage he inflicted. I know in my heart that he died ashamed through-and-through of what hed done. How nice if only hed have had the courage (that Grandpa has shown) to have faced his victim, named the hideous crime, and said, I am so deeply sorry. It was all my fault; never yours.

 

    Gracie has the opportunity that my wife was never given. I hope she will be encouraged to seize the opportunity for reconciliation--now that Grandpas actions have been clearly demonstrated to be A CRIME worthy of prison-time, and he has shown that he truly values her to the point that he will be a  F.O.O.L. on national television because he truly values her. NO JOKER is going to go to those lengths so he can have another fling with a six-year-old. NONE. (Remember, he can never go in a grocery store, a barber shop, to Wal-Mart without knowing that any number of people there recognize his face. He does wear "the scarlet A" !)

 

    Despite all my love to her, I sense that my wife still wrestles with an old issue after all these years: Do I dare trust a man again? I wish better things for Gracie. And her husband.

 

 

*sits scratching her head*.  Can you explain who's side you are on here becuase my curfuzzled head seems to think you are on grandpas side here and are defending him to th epoint that Gracies safety has kinda gone to the way side.  As Dr Phil said on the show  *that's the verdict* when the parents said no. not at this time.  I think reconcilliation is for Grace to decide when she's a little older and able to understand the full impact of why she was kept from seeing him..  A molester, imho is not intitled to face their victim, it is not a right nor is it a given. 

 

My rapist died an early death and I feared that he would find me because of threats he made to do me or my fmaily harm.  He was not related to me in any way but I lost my best friend on account of him. 

 

The irony to my story is that he litterally tried to tell the truth in court but.. those who were supposed to be on my side DROPPED the charges.. go figure.   I have never felt any revenge or any mallace towards the man but I never felt he needed to face me for any reason.  If he was to face me it would be on MY terms, not my parents or anybody else's choosing.

 

Let me ask you this.  Did you wife want to face her father?  Has she indicated she wanted to make amends?  the *gentleman* as you call him maybe have found God but that gives him no right to be apart of your wifes life unless SHE indicates it is something SHE wants or needs.  How would you feel it if was your father that molested you?  would you want to allow him to face you?

 
August 21, 2007, 6:42 pm CDT

Thank you ..

Quote From: kathleen27

What a sad series of tragic events...and brought on by the ugly root of pedophilia...it continues to grow branches, like a bramble bush.  It is most dangerous when it is unknown, or spoken in half truths.  Sadly, your late husband was medicating his pain with the drug that killed him.  Your son is 14, and he really should be gradually told of all the events that led to his father's death.  He really should have some therapy...and if you fear his grandmother may approach him, then he must be kept away.  Young teens are so into sexual experimentation, so vunerable, that you really can't take a chance.  It would be better to error on the side of caution, then to let history repeat itself.

OH GOD, NOT MY FAMILY?  I've said that...who thought that my daughter would become romantically involved with a pedophile...one who raped her younger brother and sister.  I couldn't tell, as most of them look like you and me.  How could she have believed him, then gone on to have two children with him, I don't know.  At the time my children came forward, they had gotten married, and since it was reported, 7 years ago, she has had no contact with us...like we did something wrong.  I often wonder if in siding with the offender, one seeks to protect HIM, or is it themself?  Like, If he did this, I brought him home, so if it were not for me, this couldn't have happened.  It isn't true, but emotions are funny...they don't aways make sense.  It also makes you feel as if you SHOULD have known this...when really, you couldn't.  So it's safer to feel that you are a better judge of character.  I am shocked that the number of incidents is so high, yet in a way, it brings a better understanding that anyone can have this...it does not descriminate.

I don't know your mother, but if she is willing, let her read the posts on Saving Grace, both part 1 and 2.  Her therapy may have been the result of a lousy professional, but I would encourage her to try again.  Hopefully, if she agrees to read these posts, she will not feel the isolation that so many victims do.  I can tell her that I was embarassed that such things happened in my own home...I felt as if I were a low life and if I shared this with too many people, they'd think less of me as a mother...I felt that I had failed.  In my own therapy, I came to put the blame where it belonged...at his doorstep.  Maybe in reading so many  other accounts, it will help her to come around.  I hope so.  My children, and I believe it will be the same for Grace, were young enough to get the full  benefit of therapy.  As you get older, it gets harder, because you have already formed opinions and put up walls,  they are hard to take down.  I hope that your Mom can begin to heal.

You speak volumes when you say how this must be brought into the open...and that we must strive for prevention.  So very sad that lives are lost as a result.  Please take care of yourself, too.  Good luck to you.

..so much for your reply.  I had looked for my post but couldn't see it, and thought it had been censored out.

 

I still don't know what to do about Grandma.  I could stop her from being alone with him, and she would want to know why, and we could talk.  It would be extremely stressful for me - she is a very strong, overbearing personality and I would need back-up.  Or I could just talk with her about my concerns.  It's just so ugly - I would have to talk about why I was concerned, and bring up the whole thing with Daddy dearest.  I'm not sure it would be worth all the pain.  But of course I do need help in knowing where to go from here.  Seeing this show has brought this to the forefront of my mind, which is a good thing, but I really am at a loss just now.

 

I'm going to visit with my Mom next week.  I will talk to her and ask her what went so wrong with mhs that she has refused their help ever since.

 

I'm sorry about your story.  The only reasoning that makes sense to me as to why people protect the abuser, is that it is just so difficult and painful to face the truth.  It takes bravery and courage to speak the truth sometimes, and not all people are strong like that.  The truth lurks hidden in our unconscious and sometimes it comes out, where we can deal with it, and sometimes it doesn't.

 

By the way, for at least the last several months I keep having a dream where my brother is molesting me and I'm trying to get away from him.  I don't remember anything like that ever happening, but then I don't remember a lot of my childhood because of traumatic events that took place when I was 14.  (completely unrelated to abuse)  I have tried to remember my childhood to see if there is any truth in these dreams...... perhaps they mean something else.  My brother did bully me, and now he's in the process of bullying his wife and children.  Just wondering, that's all.

 
August 21, 2007, 7:32 pm CDT

Saving Grace

What is wrong with people now a days!!!!   

 

First, why is grandpa OUT and secondly why is grandma STILL with the pervert?   And I think the most disturbing thing about this other than the obvious of what poor Grace is going through is this...........Why is her mother still with her father?  Why did Grace's father show more compasion, empathy and concern for his own father (THE ABUSER) than towards his own flesh and blood, his daughter ( THE VICTIM). 

 

I think the thought alone should have relinquished all rights to the grandchild let alone the actual act of all this.  (Sorry but I don't think anyone bought that  "The devil told him to do it).

 

I have to admit that I did not catch the second half of this story but these where my first impressions of the first show and I had to voice my opinion on this one!  I hope someone came to their senses and woke up and actually did right by this brave little girl.  It seems she would be better off not having this couple as her grandparents any longer - worse things may happen.

 

Grace should be extremely proud of herself - hold her head up high and know that she has helped many, many people by her words and actions.  She is to be comended!!

 

 

 
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