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Topic : 08/10 Wrongful Punishment

Number of Replies: 390
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Created on : Friday, April 13, 2007, 03:12:42 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 04/18/07) Fistfights in the living room, black eyes, stitches, a father punching a 17-year-old, a mother wrestling a 15-year-old to the floor … What do you do when you have no control over your teenager? Parents face off against teens in what Dr. Phil calls “one of the most disgusting displays of bad behavior on both sides that I have seen in years.” Brenda and Jim are constantly at war with Brenda’s three sons, Koltin, 17; and twins Austin and Dustin, 15. They say the teens have punched holes in the walls, physically attacked their stepfather and left home for days at a time! Brenda and Jim disagree on how to discipline their out-of-control teens and are even headed toward divorce because of it. How can they save the boys and their marriage? Then, meet a judge who believes creative punishments have the most impact. Judge Cicconetti doles out punishments that cause embarrassment and teach a lesson, such as making a teenager who stole a pornographic video sit blindfolded outside the store with a sign that reads “See no evil.” Opponents say creative punishments are abusive and cause more harm than good. What does Dr. Phil think? Join the discussion.

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April 16, 2007, 11:08 pm CDT

Punishment

Quote From: ceildh1

Re reading, yes I have to wonder myself how it got to that point, I mean I have a fifteen year old son, and a husband and they don't get physical when they argue. if it gets too heated, that's when I step in, and send them back to their corners ( its actually funny to see I'm 5'4 and 110lbs, Hubby is 6'4 and 250 son 5'11 and 140, and they scurry to their respective corners before I even get there hehe ), I don't do the whole Alpha Male thing very well.

But I do think a parent does have the right to protect themselves if there is a physical confrontation,even if it just means restraining the kid.  In Canada a parent has no recourse, your child harms you oh, well but heaven forbid you defend yourself then YOU go to jail for assault and domestic violence while the kid is given a "Poor thing " speech and a pat on the head.

Like I said, the boy calls the father outside, the onus is on the adult to walk away, but I do belive if the kid attacks, all bets are off , they do it because they CAN.

I agree a parent has a right to protect themselves but that is not the same at throwing fist back at your child. I think all beats are off when your child is finally a adult before then no you are the parent and you shouldn't ever beat your child up even if he throws this first punch.
 
April 18, 2007, 5:17 am CDT

God bless you, Dr. Phil!

Dysfunctional familes are abusive and breed dysfunctional adults. Society does not benefit from this.

 

I was raised in a dysfunctional family and it took years to recover. I have made a choice not to pass that dysfunction on to my two beautiful, innocent children. I used to destroy relationships (prior to my marriage of 18 years) and now I have peace and harmony in my busy life. It's a GREAT WAY TO LIFE!!!

 

There is no greater abuse to children than to destroy their inner spirit. They will fail in their marriages (if they are even willing to committ) and they will be lousy to have in the workplace. Many will turn to drugs and alcohol and carry with them anger problems. They will be a drain on society....IF THEY DO NOT GET HELP SOON.

 

God bless Dr. Phil for taking on this family. Each and every child is worth the effort.

 
April 18, 2007, 5:20 am CDT

Creative Punishment may be what's needed

Our current juvenile justice system is BROKEN. We slap them on the hand over and over again and then WONDER WHY they continue to break the law.

 

Since families are not instilling good values in their children, these children need a special kind of punishment to fit their crime.

 

Thank you, Judge, for coming up with punishments that will make these kids stop and think about what they have done (and what they want to do with their lives). This "creative" justice is worth a try!!! Nobody should condemn it until all the stats are in!!!

 

 

 
April 18, 2007, 6:16 am CDT

I Agree with Creative Punishment.

There was a story in the news.  There was a teenage 13 year old girl that didn't want to school, and the Mother had gotten tired of her of skipping school hanging out with her friends and getting into trouble.  Talking about Creative Punishment, the Mother actually made her daughter stand out on the sidewalk with a sign, "Will work for food."  The teenager certainly had a wake-up call that day.  She learned a very hard lesson, after being humilated and she changed her behavior and went back to school and not giving her Mother a hard time.  I have to say I commend this Mother for giving her daughter a taste of "reality" what her future was going to be. 

 

This judge that came up with Creative Punishments for these people, I agree with him.  Keep up with the Creative Punishments and give these people a wake up call. You commit the crime, you'll pay with your time with a hefty fine, "BEING HUMILATED."  

 
April 18, 2007, 6:39 am CDT

The Dog said it all!

Did you hear the Dog?  I so wish I could understand for sure what that Dog was trying to

communicate?  The Dog has seen  and heard it all, the Dog has had enough!

If the dog was the one fighting, making too much noise like in barking biting?

Would they discpline the dog or get rid of it?

The dog probably was saying: you are all out of line!

You all need to look in the mirror.

You adults cannot be further away from discipline yourselves and do not control impulses.

you children should not do what you do not like done unto you.

Poor little youngest brother?  He should take all of you to court!

They need a dog house: a place to chill out, reflect and stare at what hole they dug themselves!

The dog seemed a bit brighter than most of the household?

~~ Me: I think the parents having a PPO on thier children is so rediculous!

 
April 18, 2007, 7:09 am CDT

NEED A JUDGE HERE IN S.C.

I THINK THE JUDGE ON THE SHOW IS WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS MORE OF. MY COUSIN IS13YRS OLD. HE GOT IN TROUBLE AT SCHOOL. HE KEPT GETTING IN TROUBLE . AND I MEAN STUFF LIKE WRITTING ON THE DESK AT SCHOOL, FIGHTING WITH BOYS THAT MADE FUN OF HIM. NOT REALLY HARD CORE STUFF. NOW HE'S SITTING IN JAIL. HAS BEEN FOR 7 MONTHS NOW. HE HAS MENTAL PROBLEMS, CAUSED BY HIS MOTHER AND STEP FATHER, AND YEARS OF ABUSE. NO ONE HAS LISTEND TO HIS SIDE AND SENCE HE'S BEEN IN JAIL HIS LETTERS TO ME ARE GETTING WORST. HE WANTS TO TRY HARD DRUGS, HE WANTS TO KILL HIS SELF. LOTS MORE BUT MAIN THING IS HE DIDNT KNOW OF THIS HARD DRUG AND THINGS HE KNOWS NOW BEFORE HE WENT TO JAIL. JAIL HAS TURNED HIM INTO A REPEAT AFENDER NOW. HE'LL BE RIGHT BACK IN SOON AS HE GETS OUT. I SURE WISH WE HAD A GOOD JUDGE AROUND HERE. ABBEVILLE COUNT S.C. HAS ONLY JUDGES THAT PUT THEM ALL AWAY AND NEVER HELP THE TEENS.
 
April 18, 2007, 7:17 am CDT

04/18 Wrongful Punishment

Dr Phil one thing came to my mind watching this family with 3 teen age sons, doc you are a amazing man, but Ron white said it best[ you cant fix stupid ] and thats what it looks like your trying to do with these parents!!
 
April 18, 2007, 7:29 am CDT

The Judge's sentensing?

If so many more legal responsible authorities would take such heart into doing

what works best, our youth might be so much better foo in the long run.

Help an angry young boy before he becomes an angry adult man that inflicts harm on society!

that means go in the homes and help them there, in schools and on the streets.

*that was what Robert Brown in Michigan wanted done long ago, he was removed from his postition in the Department of Corrections?  It would have saved us all a fortune in costs of housing them prisoners now?

As for the mental health professional: there was a big problem in the youths life before they commited the act against society?  Life has rules!  humiliation is something that life's rules gives to make many adults avoid doing things that cause it?  it is a life rule!

Did you know a woman had her face scared for life because of a rock thrown from an over pass?  So what is the message of humilitation compared to the potential of that?  Far less?

I do think it is awesome you are so concerned and active in your job which obviously you take to heart as well.  that alone needs applauded with so many public officials not having enough

heart in what they do in thier jobs for youths best interest.  Even with what I do disagree with you on, I hope for more people like you in our system for children.  It is a rareity.

the humiliation as you see it is one of lifes rules: consequences for your actions!

If you commit a crime against society that is the first humiliation lesson that has obviously failed for that youth?  It is absolutely needed to put a strong impact on that rule!  It will be a gift in time.

The Judge is doing far more than 99% of the judicial system is doing to better the behavior for youth problems.  Jail is not the place for a young person not applying life rules, somewhere they did not learn it properly or had the impact of it in teh right quanities?  Wearing a sign is nothing compared to jail which stays a big factor of humiliation and regret for much more impact over their life.  Yea humiliation is a problem in many aspects, it is also a deterent for many actions, words and examples that are of negative origins?  humiliation as a consequence when the young person hits the Court system is not one of those kinds of problems.  maybe if there was far more people like you in the mental health fields teh Judges coudl use your system?

Unfortunately that is not the case.  opposite is prescriptions, counseling with alot of blaming and far too few hold the youth responsible for their actions.   They go out an reoffend with the excuses given in therapy?  All situations need the particular offense or problem addressed?

All the issues for all has to be included.  If you have some in treatment because they was humiliated for commiting a crime, if that is the problem from what they did wrong? they failed to learn they was a victimizer not the victim?  Too many offenders feel like that?

 
April 18, 2007, 8:08 am CDT

Wrongful Pinishment

 

 

    Any of you teachers out there please band with me requesting Dr. Phil to address the issue of classroom discipline , especially when dealing with kids coming from these very dysfunctional homes.

 

Thanks

 
April 18, 2007, 8:14 am CDT

This day and time

In this day and time it is hard raising children and I watched the show today and I will have to totally disagree with dr. phil on some of the things that was said.People act in the way that they were brought up. How can one teach there child to act different then the way that they were brought up. I think that Dr. phil gave the children credit for how they were acting and I don't agree with that. I'm a young mom of 3 children and my children don't dare disrespect me because I've taught them how to respect me but I'm also teaching and raising them how I was raised. The mom said that her parents basically let her raise herself so her trying to be a friend is the reason her kids don't really give her respect. I do think the parents could have handle the situation different but I don't fault them 100% percent because If my 9 year old comes in my house 6 hours after his curfew I'm tell you like this not only would he have not eating anything he would have been scared to walk in my door.  Those 3 boys were totally out of line. If every time I tell my children to do something and they turn around and curse they would not be able to talk because I would not allow that.  I think that both the children and parent should be blamed and not just the parents because everybody in america do not raised there kids the same. I do believe in creative punishment but it doesn't take much to get your point across to children but when try to start and raise children when there 9 and 10 rather then discipline them when there 3 and 4 you got a serious problem.  I think the parents and kids need serious counseling before it's to late.
 
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