Topic : 04/26 Obsessive Love

I can say after watching the show that Jeffery does definetly have control issues steming to the levels of abuse towards emotional, physical, and mental. He definetly needs to find a place where he can get help. However...........I do believe that his wife is definetly not the only victim here. I am currently going through a relationship where I have to deal with the whole "my space" deal and her going out with friends whom I didnt even know she had. We have been dating for 1 1/2 years and I have had to face things like her going out of town and saying she is with one person when really she is with another, and doesnt answer the phone when she is out of town. I have had to deal with going to bring her flowers early in the morning to her house so she has a nice suprise when she heads out for school and finding the ex fiances car parked in her driveway.............etc......I guess what I am saying is that I asked all the right questions to her, but what I had to do to find out the truths was to "spy" and follow my gut insticts......I believe Jefferys wife has indeed earned a certain amount of distrust and she has not been honest with him. A person knows when they are being lied to and I can say it does drive a person to a certain bit of anxiety and desire to know the truth. He needs HELP, and she needs to come forward and simply BE HONEST. about her endevours and rondevous.

I can't believe I just watched my life tonight. The only thing different is that my EX-husband and I didn't have a basement so I never got locked into one.

He was so unbelievably obsessed with me that I wound up having a nervous breakdown. I found out and learned later that the reason HE was accusing ME of having affairs was because he was the one having them.  Look at how he was raised. THAT tells you a lot!

 

I'd be sleeping and he'd drag me down the stairs waking up to that was so controlling and threatening and one time my nostril got caught on something and ripped. I had to have stiches.

OHHHHHHHHH Then there's the presents, combined with cut downs later.

There is no way I can get into even the slightest details of stories because it would be a 3 hour discussion.   The constant brainwashing took it's toll and I had that nervous breakdown.  I knew I was being recorded everywhere I went and thought I had to take it.  Believed I couldn't leave him. Believed I was worthless. Believed that if I was more affectionate he would stop.  Believed I was the bad guy and believed that I could change him!

That freaked me out on the show tonight when Crazy Man said that if she was more affectionate he wouldn't have to do this.  I heard that constantly.

I can't believe how much this has made me remember what I went through when so many years have passed and those horrible memories were somewhere stored in the "clean out later" section of my mind.

He will NEVER stop. It will get worse and worse until you DO lose your mind, like mine.  I couldn't even remember how to cry.  I felt nothing.  Then finally one day I "had enough", I was "sick and tired of being sick and tired".

To this day he has no idea where I live. He knows what town, but I'm not afraid of him anymore. I've taken my power back.

No one can make anyone leave that doesn't want to leave, that isn't ready to leave. God knows so many people tried to tell me to leave. We can only give our own experience, strength and hope, with the intention that we may have helped someone, somehow.

Thanks, Renee'

 

He will survive!

its the first time that i can actually say that someone has it worse than i do. my relationship is no where near as terrible as that poor scared mother. i felt so sick at just the sight of that sick & twisted pervert. he should be more than ashamed of himself. he doesnt have ocd he isnt obbessed for love, its pure jealousy and the sick high he gets from being in charge. that woman needs to stand up for herself and get him away from those kids and herself. before he decides that he needs to be like that with the children especially if they have girls. get out of there, get some help if you need it, but get out of there its over and you know its over...

Obsessie Love? I do not think so. First of all Jeffery needs to be evaluated big time. Jennifer needs to pack up the childerens and her things and leave.
Jeffery has more than obsessive love for Jennifer. That does not begin to cover it. Jennifer does not have Jeffery wrapped around her finger.
He is very insacure about himself and it has nothing to do or all to do with Jennifer. Jeffery is wants control, and Jennifer does not like that and I do not blame her.

I saw the show and I was completely DISCUSSED with Jeffrey!! Even though his wife Jennifer had an affair it does not give Jeffrey the right to abuse his wife.  While I was watching the show I could see that Jeffrey is DEFINITELY CRAZY and capable of killing her.  Jennifer needs to take her children and leave while she still has a chance because Jeffrey is a TICKING TIME BOME waiting to go off !!  As I watched the show, I got the feeling that Jeffrey is definitely a PHYCHOPATH and if his wife doesn't get out of the marriage, he is going to kill her and maybe the kids also. I feel that Jennifer needs to take the following steps:

  1. File for a divorce.

  2. Get the children and leave him and have the police at her place when she leaves.

  3. Go to a shelter for her safety, or some where that Jeffrey can't find her.

I can DEFINITELY see that this crazy man does not really want Dr. Phil's help and you can see it in his face. I hope that Dr. Phil can see that also because Jeffrey is LYING to him.

  Jennifer had better get out of the marriage before it is too late.  Jeffrey is NOT A  HUSBAND, AND HE IS A POOR EXCUSE FOR A MAN, which he is NOT!!!

 

sbanks521

You are one of many posters who are siding completely with this dangerous lunatic of a man, and who have never posted on Dr. Phil's web site before.  This makes me a bit suspicious.

She bears the burden as well.  She needs to cheat and probably did prior to their marriage.  She also likes his obsessiveness.  Either that or they are both acting these roles and we are all eating it up.

The show today was just beyond belief I'm sure there are alot of women across america who lives daily in fear. It is not right. He won't change unless the heart is changed. Dr. Phil ask questions and he avoids the questions. Only God can change this man. I feel so bad for the children the will be hurt the most in the future.

Tim

DR. PHIL, 

 She really needs to wake up and realize that one day he will take it too far and kill her. when he looses his control, I believe he will kill her before he lets anyone else have her. I would not live in that kind of enviroment one more day. Anyone can tell he is not the least bit sorry for what he has done and he will not stop, and if she thinks for one second he will she is just as crazy as him.