Topic : 07/06 “Call it Off!”

And you don't feel guilty that you'd robbed your husband of his youth?  I think to say "the couple on the show today should not get married because the man who is 19 seems to be very immature" is ridiculas.  He's "immature" compaired to what a 30 yr. old?  I imagine he would seem immature.  My kids *all seem immature* & that's not because they're really immature it's because they haven't had the same life experience I have & so when I hear of decisions they're making I'm thinking "what?!"  Thinking back to *when I was their age* I realize that the mistakes they're making I'd made too & while we want them to learn from our mistakes * experiences* some thing we have to learn ourselves!  We can't be thinking & acting like a someone 13 yrs. our senior because we haven't had those same experiences YET.  If I'm with someone of my *own age* & I'm 21 yrs. old then he or she is on the same *maturity level* as me & what to someone in her 40's may look "immature" to us may look fine just because we're on the same level.  I don't think that there can't be any age difference & frankly hubby is 6 yrs. older than I but I think when it is 10 or more years we're coming from completely different times & don't even have the same memories in the way of times.  If I say "when we were kids" I mean when *hubby & I* were kids. 

So I think my question to you was what were you doing in your 20's & do you not feel guilty that your husband missed out on those things?   

I WAS VERY YOUNG WHEN I STARTED HAVING CHILDREN, & THOUGHT THAT MARRIAGE WAS THE NEXT MOST NATURAL THING TO DO IN  LIFE, HOWEVER, WAS TOO YOUNG TO GET MARRIED, & SINCE MY PARENTS DIDN'T APPROVE OF THE MARRIAGE, HAD TO WAIT 4 YRS UNTIL I TURNED 18...WELL, BY THIS TIME, I HAD BEEN WITH THIS PERSON ON/OFF FOR 4 YRS, & ON OUR 2ND CHILD.  I HAD PLENTY OF TIME TO THINK ABOUT MARRIAGE, & KNEW THAT IT WOULD HAVE NEVER WORKED, DECIDED TO PUT OFF GETTING MARRIED, THEN YET A THIRD CHILD BEFORE I WAS EVEN 21...THOUGH HE WAS 3 YRS OLDER THEN ME, I WAS FAR MORE MATURE, DECIDED IT WAS TIME TO TAKE OUR KIDS, & MOVE ON WITH OUR LIVES...3 YRS LATER, AT THE AGE OF 24, MET MY HUSBAND, WHOM IS 9 YRS OLDER THEN I. WE MARRIED A YR & A HALF LATER, & TO BE HONEST WITH YOU, I THINK THAT WAS STILL TOO YOUNG FOR MARRIAGE, KIDS CAME NATURAL FOR ME, COMING FROM A BIG FAMILY, BUT MARRIAGE WAS ANOTHER EXPERIENCE ALL IN IT'S OWN, IT WASN'T UNTIL I WAS 30 YRS OLD THAT I FINALLY EXCEPTED MY MARRIAGE, & DECIDED IT WAS WORTH THE FIGHT...BECAUSE IT IS A STRUGGLE!

My brother at the age of 19 Married a 30 yr old women with 2 girls.

They had 2 boys and were married for 30 yrs,  when he died of a heart attack.

It was a very happy marriage.

I also wish that the audience didn't laugh at the 19 year old young man. He is obviously confused and in some emotional pain regarding his family.

Did they address the reason why Jessica is living with his parents?

I sure hope that Dr. Phil follows up with this couple. It sounds like they are both resistant to counseling because they do not want to be talked out of marriage. The young man's last minute change of mind (regarding counseling) said a lot to me- it seemed as though he was hoping Jessica would say 'yes' to the counceling, but she didn't, she said "I'm getting married in one week.." Hopefully it will be to someone else.