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Topic : 08/09 Overweight and Forgotten

Number of Replies: 454
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Created on : Friday, April 27, 2007, 02:02:37 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 05/04/07) Dr. Phil speaks with women who say they feel forgotten by their loved ones because of their excessive weight. Lorna weighs 650-plus pounds and feels abandoned by her family. Lorna’s sister, Glenice, says Lorna got herself into this situation; now she has to take responsibility and get herself out. Lorna’s boyfriend, Blair, takes care of her, but Glenice says he’s not the Mr. Nice Guy he appears to be. She says he's really an abuser. Lorna says Blair is exhausted and stressed from the hard job of caring for her, and her family needs to help rather than drive him away. Is Lorna ready to stop accepting the abuse and start accepting help? Then, Sunni weighs almost 300 pounds and wants to pursue her dream of being a plus-size model. Her boyfriend, Christian, however, says she’s too fat for the runway, and she should leave that dream to the skinny girls. Sunni says she is big and fabulous, and Christian makes her feel like she should crawl under a rock. Will Sunni be forced to pick between her relationship and her dream? Share your thoughts here.

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May 1, 2007, 1:53 pm CDT

05/04 Overweight and Forgotten

Quote From: marylahree

     Not every obese person can get off their chair and get motivated.  Your answer is out of ignorance, obviously.  For example:   Are you aware that there are diseases that are treated by oral steroids, and that the steroids themselves can increase the appetite and therefore, the weight.  So, here's a seriously ill person who has that to compound their health problems. 

 

      So if a person has reached obesity to the point of being unable to care for themself, we simply refuse to make them meals - is that it?  How foolish a thought!  Better that we get all the more involved and realize that, for whatever reason, that person is not in control.  We help!  We offer loving support, perhaps to fix healthier meals.  But we do not abandon.  As you pointed out, "changing your lifestyle isn't easy".  It does take hard work, and sometimes help and loving people who care enough to help motivate.

The poster obviously wasn't talking about people whose obesity is caused by medication they can't live without. Or, medical conditions beyond their control. But, about people who, by their own eating habits, have become obese. And, haven't reached the point where they can't exercize. Dr Phil once had a guest who blamed her 400 lb weight gain on a spider bite. And, he didn't buy that excuse for a minute. Every 3500 excess calories adds a pound. A daily six pack of Coke or Pepsi can add 155 in a year's time. And, the poster wasn't advocating starvation. Just cutting off the junk food supply.
 
May 1, 2007, 2:14 pm CDT

well said

Quote From: marylahree

     Not every obese person can get off their chair and get motivated.  Your answer is out of ignorance, obviously.  For example:   Are you aware that there are diseases that are treated by oral steroids, and that the steroids themselves can increase the appetite and therefore, the weight.  So, here's a seriously ill person who has that to compound their health problems. 

 

      So if a person has reached obesity to the point of being unable to care for themself, we simply refuse to make them meals - is that it?  How foolish a thought!  Better that we get all the more involved and realize that, for whatever reason, that person is not in control.  We help!  We offer loving support, perhaps to fix healthier meals.  But we do not abandon.  As you pointed out, "changing your lifestyle isn't easy".  It does take hard work, and sometimes help and loving people who care enough to help motivate.

that poster is obviously a perfect person and can not be bothered by those of us with problems. I would rather be overweight than not have a heart or any compassion for another human being.
 
May 1, 2007, 6:29 pm CDT

Of course Lorna feels that way

Lorna feels forgotten because she has been forgotten - plain and simple - if a person is different in any way their feelings don't count - we are nothing
 
May 1, 2007, 11:03 pm CDT

05/04 Overweight and Forgotten

Quote From: ramair

The poster obviously wasn't talking about people whose obesity is caused by medication they can't live without. Or, medical conditions beyond their control. But, about people who, by their own eating habits, have become obese. And, haven't reached the point where they can't exercize. Dr Phil once had a guest who blamed her 400 lb weight gain on a spider bite. And, he didn't buy that excuse for a minute. Every 3500 excess calories adds a pound. A daily six pack of Coke or Pepsi can add 155 in a year's time. And, the poster wasn't advocating starvation. Just cutting off the junk food supply.

I think for some there are perhaps underlying issues that need to be resolved first before they will be able to lose weight. If the reasons for the overweight are not addressed then even if weight loss is achieved it sometimes doens't last. I know with a few friends who are very over weight that the root of teh problem is sexual abuse. Subconsciously they seem to think if they are hideous in how they look then it becomes  a shield or coping mechanism for them. Some have medical reasons for the weight not due just to meds, lack of exercise, or being lazy. Sometimes it can be do to a body that doesn't matabulise food as quickly as other people and it takes or so it seems very little to gain weight versus some with a higher rate that don't always gain nearly as fast.

 

Deb

 
May 2, 2007, 8:02 am CDT

05/04 Overweight and Forgotten

Quote From: soulcatchr

IF your that overweight why in the world can you not do something about your weight? Dr's can refer you for surgery. There are diet programs which I just did myself to help you eat healthy. I find this like alcholism........just find help and make the choice to quit putting it in your mouth. When it comes down to it, your all by yourself. You should not have to depend on anyone to take care of you. For crying out loud........do something to change the situation that you are in. Opinions?

 

 

 

I feel Lorna needs to know she is loved and somewhere deep down in side something changed her view of her self .Or some one planted the seeds to help her feel the way she does

If you are pushed down enough you don't want to get up no matter how hard they try because ,people who make comments are ready waiting for you to make mistakes and get there funnies for the day so they can fill their own inadequacies.

 

Lorna you are a beautiful women who does not deserve to be treated this way please get a check up to make sure your health is not at risk because you want to be able to have a healthy happy life

You only have one life Lorna and only you can live it I am sure if you had the choice you would like to be able to do things for your self  take walks in the park  or to the shops just take one step at a time just baby steps is all you need

Just remember were there is God there is all you need just call on him and really mean it and he will answer your prayers May the love of GOD and the fellowship of Angels be with you in all you do for your future 

best wishes from Australia     lazandra

 
May 2, 2007, 9:15 am CDT

just a thought

Quote From: advocate12

I agree that more health insurance companies need to pay for surgeries like gastric bypass, if a person is morbidly obese.  I also think that we have to start spending more money on our childrens school lunches to provide better/healthier options for them.  I know that my 2nd grader is allowed to skip lunch and pick up snacks  like chips.  This is ridiculous and needs to stop.  Get rid of pizza day at the schools  and start having grilled chicken wrap day!  I think that our government has an obligation at this point to do something since our kids and our society (the United States) are the fattest out there!
Alot of these obese people need family members to cook meals for them. Why not cook healthy meals for them. Did anyone ever see I eat 33,000 calories a day on tlc? Anyway I always see family members ordering fast food or cooking very fatty foods. If they want to help add some healthy things besides all the fat. It could only help right?
 
May 2, 2007, 9:19 am CDT

hey

Quote From: thesecretone2

My wife did an amazing thing. About 2 years ago she lost over 2 hundred pounds in 18 months by changing things in her life. Now she has a whole new set of friends and I feel left out of her plans, parties, events. People think she's amazing and desire to hang out with her. I feel like I'm an embarrasment to her because I'm not included. So, one must be well adjusted to the new woman she has become after losing the weight.
Sorry about you wife. I guess she's just adjusting to her new life of feeling free. Give her time it's like she just started living. If you want to look me up I'd like to meet you. Who knows?
 
May 2, 2007, 3:43 pm CDT

I'm so sure

Quote From: lilcarter

I hate it when people ASSUME that it is soooo easy to lose weight!! I am a single mom of 3 children whom I love more than life. The only problem is when you are on assistance as I am, the cost of the healthy food is way beyond my means. I would love nothing more than to be able to buy the fruits and vegetables that would be better for my kids and me,but with my very limited income this is impossible. Almost 13 years ago I went for stomach stapling and this worked for awhile;but, as with everything else,it only works as good as what goes in your stomach. I have gained back 80 of the 100lbs I lost because I can only afford to buy what is cheapest and going to fill that emptiness in our bellies.I want them to have milk so we buy that at $7 for a 4 litre jug...which only lasts a couple days in my house...so to buy the milk they need,other things have to suffer. I eat whatever happens to be left over or whatever will fill the hole.I don't profess to know what goes on in others lives,but in mine I know that money is the biggest issue for not getting healthy foods. I just wish people wouldn't be so critical without knowing the whole story.
I am so sure like it costs so much to buy some bananas or some healthy cereal instead of sugar ceral etc. How about lettuce boy that's an expensive. Last time I checked twinkies cost more than bananas  and lettuce. As Dr. Phil would say get real!
 
May 2, 2007, 10:38 pm CDT

Don't listen to that sorry excuse for a boyfriend

Don't listen to that sorry excuse for a boyfriend.  If he really cared about you he would be supporting your dream, not making you feel like you can't do it.  I'm a firm believer that if you want it real bad and have the drive to be whatever you want, a model, doctor, or rocket scientist, you can succeed.  You go Sunni, and be a plus size model!

 
May 3, 2007, 1:45 am CDT

05/04 Overweight and Forgotten

Quote From: sabrinaspell12

I am so sure like it costs so much to buy some bananas or some healthy cereal instead of sugar ceral etc. How about lettuce boy that's an expensive. Last time I checked twinkies cost more than bananas  and lettuce. As Dr. Phil would say get real!
Are there organizations in your area where you can get food such as churches, food pantries, soup kitchens etc?  Maybe you could get fresh fruits and veggies and other healthy foods from them.  How about shopping at fruit/veggie stands or farmers markets?  Can you talk to someone who can give advice on how to stretch your food dollar?  Make sure you at least have a fruit or veggie once a day.  Every little bit helps.  Take care.  Joan
 
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