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Topic : 08/07 Torn Between Two Husbands

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Created on : Friday, May 04, 2007, 12:03:45 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 05/08/07) Is it possible to be in love with two men at the same time? Orlena is desperate for help. She says she still has feelings for her ex-husband, Chad, and she adores her current husband, Brent. Chad is a soldier and when duty called, he fought in Iraq. He returned home a changed man and their love shattered forever. What changed Chad, and what caused Orlena to leave him? Devastated and heartbroken, Orlena moved on and into the arms of Brent. Two months after marrying Brent, Chad called and begged Orlena to come back. Find out Brent's strong message for Chad. Since Chad made initial contact with Orlena, they have talked numerous times, and he even spent three days visiting her. What has she been saying to Chad, and are the chats appropriate for a married woman to have? And, will Orlena honor her commitment to Brent or return to the man who broke her heart? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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May 8, 2007, 6:54 am CDT

05/08 Torn Between Two Husbands

I am not speaking from experience because the closest person to me that has gone to Irag is my nephew thru marriage and he is still there.  But why didnt she stay with her 1st husband and try to help him work thru what he had been thru. If she loved him that much it seems like thats what she should have done.  I understand he wasnt the same man when he came back but if you love someone as much as she says she did it seems like thats what she should have done.."IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH".  I also think that if she stays with her 2nd husband she with just start to hate him. For some reason I have no sympathy for this woman the way she is coming off on the show
 
May 8, 2007, 7:09 am CDT

NOTHING CONFUSING ABOUT THE AFTER TAPING!

While Orlena sat with her arms crossed, Brent had his hand on her leg... reaching out to her.  She was cut off and emotional only for her first husband, who might not like to look like the BAD GUY, but a bad guy to me is going after a married woman which she is... NOT TO HIM!  These two deserve each other, but Brent doesn't deserve what he's getting.  I would give anything for my daughters to have such a caring guy as Brent appeared on the Dr. Phil show today!  Our eldest daugher just had the terrible experience of being told her boyfriend was in San Francisco on work assignment when he was actually vacationing at a casino in Panama City ~ the definite end to that one!  Seems like it's an easy solution if there isn't trust in the relationship.  There isn't one!  Brent, you can do so much better; good luck to YOU.  
 
May 8, 2007, 7:11 am CDT

I know what shes going through

I went through this same situation about 6 months ago.  i was engaged, not married...to my first true love.  Well, once we moved in together, we lived together for a year.  Things were good, but then started to turn bad.  I tried to tell him time after time that things weren't going right.  He never listened, he didn't appreciate me, he wouldn't help me around the house, he wouldn't get a second job to help support us while i was in school.  So i left, just like that....I contemplated it for months, but finally one day had enough.  So I guess i could say i left too quick, just like the woman on the show today.  Then i became involved with someone else rather quickly.  We have been together about 5 months now.  He's everything i ever wanted in someone.  But when my ex calls and tells me how much he loves me and misses me, it gives me that mixed feeling of emotion as well.  It is a very hard siuation to be in! But it is correct that you can't have your cake and eat it too.  Ive had to tell my ex to leave me alone and give me my space in order to sort my feelings with my current boyfriend.  Everything Dr. Phil told her was compltely correct! She has got to just take space from the ex in order to sort out her feelings, and not make the same mistake again!
 
May 8, 2007, 7:12 am CDT

Poor Brent

 Brent should just pack up and cut his losses.  Orlena is just playing with his emotions.  I think he deserves sooooooooooo much better.  The signs are there that Chad is the first choice.  Going out to dinner and drinks (without him), talking on the phone, and saying that she can't see a future without Chad in it because he is her best friend. 

 

Not once did she have contact with her husband.  I think she already knows who she wants but doesn't want to hurt Brent.  She wants Chad.

 

Let her go.  A wise woman once said the best revenge is moving on and being happy.  Move on, Brent.

 
May 8, 2007, 7:17 am CDT

Are ya kidding me

WOW!!! Brent is sooooooooo not deserving of that kind of treatment from his so-called wife.

She needs to pack up and leave so he can move on to a better life ....

I blame her more than Chad actually....

Hey Brent... I have a best friend who would treat you like you should be treated!! LOL

 
May 8, 2007, 7:18 am CDT

Maybe I'm Confused...

Wasn't the show about the three people who appeared as guests, not the war?

 

WRT the shows actual topic, I think it would be best for Brent to accept she doesn't truly love him as a wife should. It seems to me he may be best served to let her go.

 
May 8, 2007, 7:20 am CDT

It is a touch choice to make!

    I myself was involved in an emotional affair with a man I thought would be better for me than my current husband! I know how tough it is to get out of such a situation! I nearly ripped my marriage apart (and my kids were getting out of hand!) due to this affair!

    In my heart and mind, I think it'd be best for Orlena to stay with Brent and get counseling together as a couple and seperately. Yes, Chad made his choice to go and fight for our country (God bless you Chad! I look up to you with great honor man!) but, at the same time, as many of us know, it can be tough on both the husband and the wife when one is away for so long!

    I'm not saying that her and Chad were right in splitting in the first place, but yet, I understand how easy it is for a woman to "fall in love" with a man whom she feels is "giving her everything she wants and needs". Brent and Orlena need time to "fall in love" for real and grow together. As for Chad, there are women out here whom are looking for just a man as you. Again, I give Chad the praise and honor that he deserves, for going over and fighting for our country! Welcome home Chad and best wishes to Orlena and Brent and Chad in all your choices and decicions. I will be praying for you all for the next 90 days! (or more!)

Yours truely...     

 
May 8, 2007, 7:20 am CDT

05/08 Torn Between Two Husbands

Quote From: pinkypolly

Easier said than done. If she's still in love with her first husband it will be difficult to just forget him. She made a committment to the first husband too and circumstances caused her to change course. Maybe she made a snap decision in divorcing him and we all know that snap decisions have a way of unfastening.

Be sympathetic to the situation. I feel her pain.

Be sympathetic to the situation. I feel her pain.

 

Why? Because she was weak & acted impulsively several times? Her pain is her own creation.

 
May 8, 2007, 7:21 am CDT

Not confused

As Dr. Phil said, Brent cannot wait around for Orleana to figure out who she wants. I believe her relationship with Chad is VERY inappropriate and Chad also needs to evaluate his relationship with Orleana as she may do the same to him as she is doing to Brent now.

 

I just want to say to Brent that I am one of the 10 million watching today and am single, as are several of my friends!

 
May 8, 2007, 7:22 am CDT

Lead-Up Was Misleading

The lead-up/ ads for this episode were misleading. I was under the impression that she thought her first husband had died in Iraq.

 

Glad he's alive but I was confused, lol.

 
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