Topic : 07/31 Strung Out!

i too, live with chronic pain and have had more prescriptions for every kind of narcotic there is and I am disabled with a legimate diagnosis for my meds, however, people need to reallize there are 2 sides to this story. there are doctors out there who make their living by preying on peoples addiction/addictive behavior and will write these people prescriptions every month for what ever they ask for as long as they come every 30 days  and are willing to pay cash or have insurance that will pay them for their time. Many of these doctors see 40-60 patients daily and even have  Physican Assistants who see as many patients as they do. Its a called a cattle practice, see as many in a day as you can, make as much money as you can and some even will set up "pain management clinics" to try yo justify what they are doing. My doctor had so many patients that on numerous times I would be given prescriptions written for someone else, often with the same first name and but  for totatly different meds.  then they started mailing them to me bi-monthly but billing my insurance company as if i was there. the staff in this office changed rapidly! I no longer take narcotic drugs to control my chronic pain, and I no longer feel like a cow being herded through someones pockets book. perhaps some one should look into this side of this type of addiction. people cant become addicted to prescribtion drugs without the piece of its written on. think about it? where did it really start at, with the patient or the doctor? We deserve respect for our condition, not to always to labeled as drug seekers from the other medical community. Chronic pain is real, it often takes over lives. It is not a sign of weakness or bad character for some of us it is a fact of life, for the rest of our lives. Don't act like you don't notice the struggle. People need to acknowledge a persons suffering and we need to be clear that there is a difference be addicttion and dependence and act accordingly to help our loved ones or ourselves.

I watched this special with the hopes that I would see something that maybe was new to me regarding the addiction of Meth.  I then came to the message board hoping to see something that would give me inspiration and hopes that there is recovery from Meth.  Iread your message and wanted you to know that I am very proud of your success.  Your message is what i was looking for as it shows that there is life after physical recovery and that it is never to late.

In 1999 I married my high school sweetheart after being in a relationship with him for 7 years.  When we were married he had been clean from Meth for 2 years as suggested through his recovery program that he wait at least this long to make any commitments.  Every day was a struggle for him and I could see at times his need for something more however it appeared as if he was content.  Unfortunately 3 years ago while I was pregnant with our second child he ran into his old play-mates and his sobriety and strong will failed him.  He began using again and slowly our lives fell apart.  I made a decision after several months of begging and pleading for him to get help that it was time that my children and I leave him to self destuct.  He had become paranoid, verbally and physically abusive and at times would be gone without concern for himself or his children.  He also had started a relationship outside our marriage as well with someone that needless to say was half his age.  Love was not the issue as when you love someone it just does not go away even in the midst of horrible turmoil.  I had gone through this with him before with his addiction and I could see that he was suffering terribly.  This time however I had children and they were the priority...not him.

As of today we are divorced, I have full-sole custody of our children and he has occasional visitation.  He has lost everything that was important to him, his home, his children, steady source of income, friends, security, respect of himself and most important his serenity and belief in his higher power. Most recently he was incarcerated due to monitoring of his probation being violated because of Meth being in his system.  He is not responsible for anything that he does and blames everyone else for his failures.  He has made undescribeable choices that are hard to explain

I do not love him anymore but wish for his well being for the sake of our children.  I pray for him to find sobriety and serenity.  I remind myself everyday of the 3 C's as I have always been a great enabler however I work everyday to try and change that!

I have found someone wonderful in my life that is a great sounding board, loves me and my children dearly and it is more then I could of ever hoped for.  I believe now that good things can come to those who wait.  My dad (who has been sober for 8 years) told me last year while we were sitting on his porch that one of my greatest accomplishments in life was breaking the cycle of addition.  While this came at a cost and something that I never thought would happen to me I hope that he is right. 

Thank you for sharing, it really made me see that there is life after losing everything and this is something that I hope for my childrens father everyday. 

I just wanted to say good for you!!  My last straw with my meth-addicted ex-husband wasn't cheating but a fight over a cell phone that my mom gave me to use that he refused to let me take anywhere.  It snapped while we were yelling about a stupid cell phone, him calling me every foul name in the book and threatening me, that I didn't want to do this anymore....I didn't want that for my kids anymore.....I didn't want him to eventually go to far in a beating and end up killing me, so when he told me that if I took that cell phone back to my mom that I might as well stay there, I said ok, grabbed the cell phone and left.  It was the most freeing, wonderful feeling to be away from him and all that came along with his addiction to meth.  I am now remarried to a wonderful man that feels the same as I do about drugs.  I do not regret anything that I have gone through with my ex, like you said I am soooo much stronger because of the things that I had to live through.  My kids have a real father figure in there life now with my new husband and I am the happiest that I have ever been!!

And I would like to say thanks to Dr. Phil for doing this type of show.  I don't think that most people know the type of problem that Meth has become across the country.  I don't think that some people understand the effect a person's addiction has on their families!  Thank you Dr. Phil!!!!

I haven't been to the Dr. Phil Forums in quite some time, but for some reason ended up here tonight and, of course, your post was the first I read in reference to this show.  My heart goes out to you, as well as your entire family enduring such difficult and potentially life-taking situations.  Please know that "tough love" is certainly NOT the answer, yet the answer is certainly not compromising your life, marraige and well being to simply help your son while he's on such a destructive path.  Although, we spend the formative years of our children's lives providing as you have been for your son, that level of parenting should not be your focus at this stage of the game - especially while you are fighting cancer.  As I'm sure you know, it should be the other way around.

Yet, I completely understand your reasoning and certainly could not say that I wouldn't do the same myself.  So, please know that I am not passing judgment at all.  In fact, I admire your efforts to continually reach out to help him . . . to save his life. 

Although my appearance on a Dr. Phil Show on this very topic was extremely brief, I was extraordinarily blessed to receive guidance on my treatment and recovery from Dr. Phil.  I only mention this in the hopes of adding credibility to what I am about to share.  I don't want you to think that I'm just a "passerby" that is completely unfamiliar with the overwhelming desperation that you and, most assuredly, your son are experiencing. 

Its been about 2 years since my treatment at Florida Detox which is where I had the opportunity to begin my journey into recovery.  While watching a previous Dr. Phil Show where he referred his guest to Florida Detox, I learned for the first time that a person seeking treatment for this condition was not destined to suffer acute withdrawal syndrome, nor did they have to be seperated from their family for any extended period of time.  In fact, I learned that it was possible to undergo a painless detox and, within the same week, have the pre-existing conditions that create the urge to self-medicate, treated effectively.  Their treatment, including 3 months of follow up care, has an extraordinarily low relapse rate compared twith the national average for all other forms of treatment.  Statistically, over 90% of those completing traditional forms of treatment relapse.  Yet, only 28% of Florida Detox patients ever relapse. The dramatic differences between other conventional treatments and tthe unique approach Florida Detox offers are certainly not limited to the representative statistics.  The dramatic differences in their knowledge base, approach, process and purpose are certainly as dramatic ally different as are their statistics. 

Once you come face to face with the standard and horrible choices a person has at this juncture, you begin to understand why only 10% of the millions of people struggling with this disease, ever do pursue treatment!  Only 10%!  Sad, isn't it? 

Yet,  there is hope for you and your son.  Obviously, the barrier to treatment that your son is facing rght now is desire.  As I personally discovered, much of the resistance to getting treatment stems from the ridiculously low success rates, despite the incredible suffering one must endure to just get clean.  As a result, many people struggling with addiction don't see the point in even trying.  Yet, when the process is painless, extremely successful and, unlike many treatment centers, involves an amazing staff that treats each patient with tremendous respect and sincere compassion - treatment becomes something worth fighting for . . . . as opposed to something to fight against. 

So, please provide your son the opportunity to consider his treatment options that can, if pursued, provide him a painless, cravingless and enjoyable transition into the journey of recovery.  Check out www.FloridaDetox.com, if you get a chance.

All my best and God Bless,

Cara