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Topic : 05/11 Obsessive Love: On the Run

Number of Replies: 2447
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Created on : Friday, May 04, 2007, 12:13:43 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
The incredible drama continues involving Jeffrey, an obsessive husband who won’t let go of his wife, Jennifer. After the last show, Jeffrey is on his way back to the treatment facility, when his anger gets the best of him, and he jumps out of the car and goes on the run. He finally calls his therapist from a taxi cab, but soon after is on the loose again. After four hours and a frenzy of phone calls with Dr. Phil show producers, see what Jeffrey demands. With the stress and pressure getting the best of her, Jennifer sits down with Dr. Phil to discuss their next step. In a hurried panic, Jennifer heads home and is shocked by what she finds when she walks in the front door. She takes her kids and flees to her mother’s house. Even though she’s in a safe place, why does she say she still lives in fear? Then, Jennifer’s attorney files papers and meets Jeffrey in front of a judge. Will Jeffrey be able to comply with the judge's orders? And, Jeffrey resumes talk with the Dr. Phil staff. What is he asking for? Jeffrey’s behavior continues to shock and mystify Jennifer and leaves her with only one choice. Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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May 10, 2007, 3:25 pm PDT

this man is crazy

I had a boyfriend that did some of these things that his guy is doing.  I was with him for five years and finally got away.  It now scares me to think that it could have escalated this far and worse.  I hope for her sake that she gets out and gets help.  It does not matter that she had any affairs to, so call, cause this, it does not justify any treatment that she is receiving from this man in this manner.  He would have found another excuse to control and abuse her without the affairs, take my word for it. 
 
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May 10, 2007, 3:29 pm PDT

Jeffery & Jennifer

I cannot believe that anyone believes this guy wants help....he only wants the notarity of this whole thing...he is sick, sick, sick.....this guy will never get well....Maybe I missed something, but what kind of childhood did he have......it seems whenever there's a problem with someone people tend to question the past and the childhood they had....Not that I think Jeffery had a bad one but I don't remember this ever being addressed.....as for his wife and kids, this guy is dangerious!!!! if he doesn't harm his family I'll be quite surprised.  I hope the security that Dr. Phil has secured works because this guy is smart....he's so sick that he'll find a way to hurt his family....he's smart, slick and one bad and dangerious person.....I feel so sorry for his family......I don't feel sorry for him for he's accomplishing exactly what he set out to do and that is to appear on t.v. and "ask fo help"...what a joke!  I can't believe that Dr. Phil and his staff have bought into his act. 

 

Again, I hope his family is safe ....and that no harm will come to them.....

 

 

 
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May 10, 2007, 3:52 pm PDT

Like the alcoholic

Quote From: firebrand326

I was thinking the very same thing - why did she accept calls - and why were camera crews there filming these calls?  That seems abusive to me...

Its like the alcoholic....if the alcoholic is in treatment, they don't slip him a drink on the side?????  If this is a well-known treatment facility like Dr. Phil says, why did they allow him to have ANY contact with her???  they should have been monitoring that???   She is his drug of choice...

 
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May 10, 2007, 4:18 pm PDT

Simply stated!

Quote From: jody1234

I APPLAUD JENNIFER FOR GOING FORWARD TO MOVE ON WITH HER LIFE AND TAKING THE STEPS  NECESSARY TO PROTECT HER AND HER CHILDREN TO GET A DIVORCE!!!!!   IT DOES TAKE ALOT OF COURAGE TO DO THAT.....IT TAKES AWHILE FOR US TO BE FREE FROM THAT SICKNESS ( AS I STAYED IN AN EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE MARRIAGE ALSO - BEEN FREE FROM IT FOR 16 YRS!!!!!!)   WITH ALOT OF GREAT SUPPORT, COUNSELING, ALANON AND SUPPORTIVE FRIENDS, I AM FREE TODAY AND IT FEELS GREAT!!!!!    

 

JENNIFER, KEEP PUTTING ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER.....SURROUND YOURSELF WITH A GREAT SUPPORT SYSTEM AND YOU WILL BE FREE ALSO!!!!   DO NOT GIVE HIM "ANY" POWER OVER YOU....GOD IS IN CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE, NOT JEFFREY!!!!

 

JODY - FT WORTH TEXAS 

Jody I commend you for putting it plain and simple. I wish more women could pull themselves up by their boot straps and follow your lead!

 
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May 10, 2007, 4:22 pm PDT

No kidding

Quote From: ronin2

Really! He doesn't need to be in a theraputic facility, he needs to be in a full fledged asylum. The man is just plain unstable.

Put him in a straight-jacket and lock him in a padded room! He's out of control!

 

I am reminded of a show I saw in the aftermath of the VT massacre about kids who turn to eratically violent behavior and the things they have in common. One symptom was they all cut themselves off from the world mentally and emotionally and create their own worlds inside their head.

That sort of isolationist mentality can apply to a lot of people who exhibit criminal behavior and I certainly think this is applicable with Jeremy. He has sunk into his own little world of anxiety and control. In his world everything is under his power and everything is out to get him and his. He has sat there, fermenting in this personal universe for so long that if anything disrupts it, if he is out of that comfort zone for even a moment, as we have seen, he looses it.

Dr. Phil has been trying to reach him, everyone has, but it seems like he is just to far off, he has been possessed by this anxiety for too long, for just words to have any effect.

 

I pity him.

I really do.

 

He is not in control of himself. He is incapable, in the state he's in now, of acheiving personal happieness because he is in such a dark place.

 

Maybe he is beyond help, I don't know, I certainly hope not.

 

But one thing is for sure, and has been made very clear in the four episodes this couple has been on here, there is nothing Jennifer can do to help him. She will not be doing anyone any favors by staying with him.

Did you notice on today's show that the prominent theme with Jeffrey is total denial of his actions?  I've never seen anyone dance around the issues and never once hold himself totally accountable for his actions!  I truly believe he thinks she's to blame for why he treats her the way he does - and what a two-faced man he is.  Calling her mother and her friends and accusing her of having an affair.  She'd better chuck this loser and run cross country if she has to.  Maybe Dr. Phil needs to sequester her and the children in the Dr. Phil House to get her through this divorce and keep her safe.  Wonder if he'd pony up on that idea?  :)
 
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May 10, 2007, 4:31 pm PDT

This guy is pyscho!!!

 This guy needs more than 30 days at rehab. He needs months of therapy; maybe years. Where do men like this learn this behaviour? Are they shown this growing up or is it a mental thing?
I'm glad that Jennifer is getting out. I'm only sorry it took her this long to do it and hopefully the damage to the children can be reversed. I hope they are also in counceling with the mother.
Lisa from Oregon
 
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May 10, 2007, 4:40 pm PDT

Insane Jealousy

This man is suffering from a severe jealousy illness and I believe that he cannot control his thoughts. However,  he will have to be taught  how to control his actions and his words. For every action there is a reaction and some people have to learn to react in a positive way. This may take a very, very long time.  He is now AWARE and seeking help, that is the first step, but he cannot get better alone. We need to bring awarness to the world about this least understood human problem.  It is very real and affects more families then we think. Most people are to embarassed to admit it.   Instead of saying this man is crazy and she needs to leave him, why aren't we saying how can we help him ? Criticism is the worst thing to do.  He is a human being and he is suffering  inside just as she is .  Don't get me wrong, I feel terrible about what she and the children are going through, and I believe that they are in danger, and the only answer may be to live part from each other. Awareness, Awareness, Awareness, of your feelings and actions, along with intervention,is the best resolution I feel.
 
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May 10, 2007, 4:59 pm PDT

He needs to stay put!!

 

I agree with the other ladies... he was basically contradicting himself by saying the doctor told him one thing. And then come back and say that his wife said another thing. It's just best for her to live her life without being afraid in her own house. And it's also good that she is really seeking help her in getting personal secruity in protecting her well-being. I mean basically he needs to stay put where he's at, so he can fully heal. Because his actions are not normal, and it needs to be adressed in the right way.

 

 
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May 10, 2007, 4:59 pm PDT

My Question

My Question is why do people abuse especially men??  It doesn't make sense!  My Dad emotionally abused my Mom for years and he isn't a very good father to us either and I am just wondering why, what give a person the right to abuse??   I don't think that Jeff like's Jennifer because of the way he treats her!  Jeff never going to change but I can't judge though.   I just hope and pray that Jennifer and her kids will be safe!!  Good luck Jennifer!!!
 
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May 10, 2007, 5:05 pm PDT

Together, can we commit him?

It is my understanding if he is mentally unstable, he can be placed under a protective custody for 48 hours, or an emergency detention if he is unstable and commits and crime, or is harmful to himself or others.  And this to me, would qualify for an emergency detention.  During that 48 hours he is held and mentally evaluated, then goes before a judge with a recommendation regarding a care program, or release. 

 

Given alone the 4-hrs. of tapes, Dr. Phil's evaluation, and the evaluation of the Psychiatrist, I feel he would be required by law to remain in inpatient treatment against his will.  It is also my understanding it requires 3 people to commit someone for long-term psychiatric committment.  There were over 10 million people who witnessed his behavior, not to mention his own family who has lived with this all these years.

 

And if he were committted, Jennifer and the children's lives would not have to be upset.  No one would have to worry who his next victim would be.  Regardless he has psychiatric problems, his behavior and actions are criminal, unstable, and unpredictable. 

 

 ALL of us are to be watching for people who appear to be a threat to society.  Since 911.  Even more recently, Virginia Tech.  Together, we could put this man away for a long time, keep ourselves safer, allow Jennifer and their children to heal, and start in the process towards sending messages to those just like him that every human being has the right to freedom, and to feel safe in this world.  It's not up to Jeffrey. 

 
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