Topic : 05/11 Obsessive Love: On the Run

My posts keep disappering and not showing on the board, grrrrr...

Okay, Jeffrey is a nut case, I think that is the case.  He needs help.

But since I have a family member that is mentally ill and he has been in several treatment facilities, I have NEVER seen one that allowed patients to have a telephone in their rooms.

Or to be allowed to use the phone the way that has been described that Jeffrey used the telephone.  I just don't understand. 

Someone posted a few minutes ago asking HOW does an abused woman act?  well IMO most of them AVOID men like the plaque, at least for a while.  They usually have problems TRUSTING their OWN judgement and want to concentrate on getting themselves better and focusing on their children.

AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT THINKS SOMETHING IS TOTALLY "OFF" WITH THIS ENTIRE SERIES!!!

I don't understand why there is so much blame on the victim.  None of you understand what Jennifer has gone through, nor the children.  How can you say her actions are childish?  Have you ever lived in a situation of domestic violence?  Domestic violence is not always physical.  It is emotional, financial, and psychological.  Women who have suffered long term abuse (not only physical) suffer from PTSD.  This man is older than her.  She got married too soon.  So many variables are put into this equation.  But the point is, he controlled her, he controlled her supportive relationships with friends and family and co workers.  He controlled her financially, emotionally, psychologically.  Until the day some of you have lived through a relationship like this, like I have, you have no right to judge her.  No RIGHT TO JUDGE HER!  That is the problem with society.  Blame the victim.  She didn't act right, she didn't talk right, she didn't dress right, etc etc etc.  It is time that society protects women in this situation, it is time that society reaches out to women, it is TIME!  Don't blame her.  She wanted out a long time ago but was too afraid to do so.  Some women stay until their partners kill them or until there is nothing left of them emotionally or psychologically.  Jennifer you and your children are in my prayers and I hope that your husband/exhusband pays for a long time to come. 

God bless,

roses

I am wondering how Jeffery was supposed to get through rehab about is obsessive behavior while he knows Jennifer is home screwing around with other men? There has been such little focus upon her behavior. The recent show where she was "invited to an event" in her words while at her Mother's and all of the pictures were taken of her embracing the local "dudes" which ended up on the net is a tell tale sign she ain't grieving much over her husbands pain.

The imbalance between tearing Jeffery a new ass and everybody wanting him in jail for the rest of his freaking life, taking his wife and kids away, soaking him for every nickel he has compared to the constant feeling sorry for Jennifer, reaching out, offering understanding for her breaking her marriage vows, the Dr Phil staff all running around trying to help her stay in control of Jefferys run to the airport was and is absolute evil.

This is the very first time I have ever felt Dr Phil is wrong about how he handled his guests.

I have watched the show for years and always felt he was on solid ground,but not now.

Jeffery was cast in a light from the very first airing as a psycho for his behavior. He freely admitted to putting cameras everywhere to watch her every move and has totally become obsessed with his need to monitor and control her ability to cheat on him.

If he had the cash to hire professional private detectives to watch her every move and just went to work everyday our perception of him (for the masses) might indeed be different.

HE HAS THE RIGHT TO BE INFORMED!

When Dr Phil yelled the question to him "What gives you the right....." and "What is it in your head that makes you think for a minute it's okay to do this to your wife"  I wish he would have yelled back "The same thing that gives her the right to break her wedding vows"  This woman is lying to Jeffery and is CHEATING!  Jeffery has the right to be INFORMED!

The show Cheaters have revealed tons about human behavior in these situations. People cheat and lie in relationships to really good honest hard working people all of the time. Even when confronted directly they still try to lie about what is even happening right in front of them.

This woman is cheating on her husband, she is lying to him on a regular basis. I watched her lie so well on the phone to him trying to trap him when he was making his run that it made me sick how well she could ACT like she cared about him.

I hope you are all happy that Jeffery is finally in jail. I am not. I think its the same thing as some poor dude who gets shot by a police officer because he did not respond properly to the officer's orders.  When all the man needed is some "head space" to really THINK about his situation.

I ask again, would Jeffery have bailed out of treatment if Jennifer was ALSO in a treatment facility getting some help? Where he knew she was fixing her problem with the need for OTHER MEN?

If Jeffery could have known that she was SAFE and NOT ABLE TO CHEAT on him while he was in treatment, I could almost guarantee he would have tried harder to get past his internal problems. This is a man who wants help.  Locking him down while his wife is home free to do whatever and whomever she wants and lie about it aferwards to him isnot giving him the head space he needed to do it.

Jeffery needs help, he has gotten himself caught up in the web of "watching" her to a very unhealthy point. As I said earlier HE HAS THE RIGHT TO BE INFORMED of the truth of what she is doing.

Jennifer also needs help, she is lying and cheating on her husband, breaking her wedding vows, and has a need for other mens attention. Even if Jeffery is out of the picture she will mess up her kids with this unhealthy mindset . Many of you who excuse everything she has done to this man seem to overlook this. You would rather think Jeffery is going to kill Jennifer and steal the kids away, which would never have happened. Proof is when she got home and he was there what did he do?  take the kids? hurt her?   nope.......just tried to give her a hug, to which everybody responded with making him out to be so crazy that the end result is what you all wanted for him, jail.

Definca

Honestly, at times I wonder what direction we are all headed.  It is very frustrating to read the post , it really sets us all  back.

I hold back my feelings here the best I can. I wonder why we all cry at the incident at Virginia tech, yet here, some cannot make even a mild connection.  They want to blame the victim because she is not perfect.  Every single one of those victims at Virginia tech were imperfect and we all call it a trajedy.  That is not being over dramatic, that is fact and it applies with this family.

It seems people cannot understand until there is a sea of bodies and then it is too late.  Why cry later when we can do something now!

For some of the people who write in and think this is all Jennifer's fault, I fear for their significant other.   It indicates to me that they believe if their partner made a mistake then that would give them a free pass to do whatever.  Abuse comes in many forms.

I hope your life is better now. 

Sincerely....mike

I hope now that Jeffrey has violated the restraining order numerous times, he gets charged with each time. That should keep him away from Jenn long enough for her to get her feet back on the ground.

This guy was nuts from the first episode! Closing his eyes when he answered, crying, blaming his wife for his behaviour, then to the last episode where he demands what he wants and when he doesn't get it he runs......how typical of a possessive/abuser.

I hope Jenn is granted full custody and a permanent restraining order, sells her house and moves to another state with better stalking laws and some great therapy for her to recover with.

Jenn and the children will all need some therapy for a few months at least. Then they can be strong enough to move on.

Jeffrey you don't get it. And you probably never will unless you quit blaming everyone else for your problems.

You did this. All by yourself.

No help was needed by the counsellors or the Dr. Phil show. The more help they gave you the deeper hole you dug for yourself.

You tried to manipulate everyone and everything......only problem was you were dealing with people who know the game and how you play it......so you lost.......everything including now your freedom.

Get your butt back to Creative Care and stay until you get it.......even if it takes 6 months!

You have permanently lost Jenn but at least there maybe a chance with another woman ..... someday.