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Topic : 08/14 Meddling Moms

Number of Replies: 500
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Created on : Friday, May 11, 2007, 02:30:22 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 05/17/07) They track your every move and monitor your conversations. This sounds like the latest GPS locator, but they’re actually meddling moms! Audrey says her mother, Mary, is rude, manipulative and trying to destroy her marriage. She says Mary calls her up to 10 times a day, telling her how to raise her kids and how to handle her husband, Matt. Matt says his mother-in-law constantly criticizes him, calling him names like “fat” and “lazy,” and saying he’s not a good provider. Audrey says the situation is so bad, she’s thinking of moving away just to find some serenity. Mary wants to butt out of Audrey’s business but says her daughter keeps putting her in the middle. Will mother and daughter ever see eye to eye? Then, Debbie says she wants her 24-year-old daughter, Amy, to get a job and get out of her house. She says Amy is a lazy slob who sleeps all day while other people care for her four children. Debbie and her husband, Dave, say they’ve spent over $70,000 on Amy in the last two years and it’s time for her to support her own family. Amy says her mom is overbearing and always on her case – telling her when to go to bed and how to raise her children. Can Dave and Debbie restore peace in their marriage and home without damaging their relationship with Amy? Tell us what you think.

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May 14, 2007, 11:29 pm CDT

This is for Amy

You complain because your mom tells you what time to go to bed and how to raise your kids.  Well, here's a news flash for you... YOU LIVE IN YOUR MOTHERS HOME!!!!!  Your mom has every right to tell you what to do. You sponge off of your parents so the least you could do is follow some simple rules that your parents have for THEIR home.  The key word is THEIR home. Not your home. If you want to sleep all day and be a leach on society then move out and get your own place...DUH!!!!!  But the fact is, if you live in someone elses home you follow their rules!

 

I think your mom should take away your kids and kick you out on the street! 

 

And let me ask you this...Why did you have kids anyway????  I always thought people like you should have to apply for a license before being allowed to reproduce!!!  That's all this country needs is one more lazy, wellfare mom to teach her kids how to be leaches on this countries system. GOOD JOB MOM!!!! 

 

You are a true waste of space and air!

 
May 15, 2007, 6:20 pm CDT

YOU SAID IT!!

Quote From: ohdang13

You complain because your mom tells you what time to go to bed and how to raise your kids.  Well, here's a news flash for you... YOU LIVE IN YOUR MOTHERS HOME!!!!!  Your mom has every right to tell you what to do. You sponge off of your parents so the least you could do is follow some simple rules that your parents have for THEIR home.  The key word is THEIR home. Not your home. If you want to sleep all day and be a leach on society then move out and get your own place...DUH!!!!!  But the fact is, if you live in someone elses home you follow their rules!

 

I think your mom should take away your kids and kick you out on the street! 

 

And let me ask you this...Why did you have kids anyway????  I always thought people like you should have to apply for a license before being allowed to reproduce!!!  That's all this country needs is one more lazy, wellfare mom to teach her kids how to be leaches on this countries system. GOOD JOB MOM!!!! 

 

You are a true waste of space and air!

I whole-heartedly agree!!
 
May 15, 2007, 10:57 pm CDT

Thank you for your agreement

Quote From: mustbecrazy

I whole-heartedly agree!!

People like Amy just make me soooo mad. I just want to grab that girl/woman and give her a good shake and tell her to grow up. The day she found out she was having a child was the day she should have said, "Ok, play time is over. It's time to move out of Mommy's house and be a grown up."  And the fact that Amy kept having children is just beyond me.  Birth control is free if she had gone to the Health Dept. . But I guess that would have clashed with her need to sleep all day.  If this woman has no goals in life and job to report to, I say she join the Military and contribute to our countries safety and well-being.  No to mention, it will teach her some self-respect and disipline. 

 

 

 
May 16, 2007, 1:27 am CDT

People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones

Being a mother is a tiring and demanding job that never ends. And before everyone puts down Amy we need to remember that she has four kids, and they are all under the age of 4.  Her youngest is only three months old.  I know that when my baby was that young she had to be fed every  two to three hours and that involves being up many times throughout the night.  Have any of you ever heard of the expression "sleep when the baby sleeps" ?  Well  doing this would be impossible if you have three other babies running around.  No wonder shes tired.  She is only 24 and is now a single mother left with 4 kids and all of the worries and stress that come along with being that.    I Think that she has just lost control of her life, and i think she needs more than just monetary support from her family  She needs someone to tell her that she can do better and deserves better.  She does know that she need a job but like many she is stuck in a bad situation.  How do you pay for child care for your four kids while working a job that will barely cover that expense? It is a tough situation.  While it may look like an easy solution from the outside try to put yourself in her shoes.  This is her life and it has to be hard for her to do it alone.  Maybe her deadbeat husband should pay some child support.  Good luck Amy, You can do more than you give yourself credit for, and you are stronger than you think. 

 
May 16, 2007, 8:18 am CDT

Mothers

Move as far away as possible when you get married is my motto.

Do not live next store, and in the next town to your mother in law or your own mother.

I know people who live right next store to there parents, and they are married.

 It causes nothing but trouble.  They are always, into there business. 

 

And if it is the wifes, mother, or husbands mother, they should stand their ground and tell her in no uncertain terms to get LOST, if she does not, and keeps it up, well, there is always jail.

They need to stand up to her, she will get the message. If she gets hurt, emotional so what. she will get over it.

 
May 17, 2007, 12:06 am CDT

Amy

I am furious after watching The meddling moms episode.  I think Amy was made out to be lazy. She might not be but from watching the show thats what I would take from it. I am a 24 yr old married mom of 2. I dont have anyone helping me. I live in Germany away from all of my family and my husband has been in Iraq for the past 9 months. He missed almost my entire pregnancy and the birth of my second son. I did have help from Dec until March because I went home. Now I am back in Germany and doing it alone again. I dont get the option to sleep in til 4 and if Im sick, too bad I still have to get up and take care of them. I dont get a day off. Not only that I do all of the cooking, cleaning, drs appts and on top of it all I will soon be the Family Rediness Group Leader. If I can do it alone with absolutly no help she can do it with help.
 
May 17, 2007, 1:33 am CDT

05/17 Meddling Moms

Quote From: sfuger

My mother is definately a meddling mom.  She tries to give me advice on how to raise my kids all the time, wheather I ask or not.  She tells me how my husband should treat me.  My mother's relationships are far from healthy and she is an alcoholic with various mental diagnosis. She doesn't have the credibility to offer me any advice.  My husband would rather she drop off the face of the Earth.  I agree only to a point.  She is my mother and my children's grandmother.  So, the way we have controlled the situation is we did move out of the state.  It has done us wonders, even though she visits like twice a year.  She also only has one of our phone numbers.  We have given strict intructions to everyone not to hand out our numbers.  If I don't want to talk to her I let voice mail pick up.  That way what ever she has to say isn't as stressful, I don't retaliate.

I'm hearing you there, we live 15 hours drive away from my mother and that was the best move we ever made. 

 
May 17, 2007, 1:40 am CDT

05/17 Meddling Moms

Amy is so young and now the kids are here she seems to be trying to reclaim her youth.  Amy seems to be blaming her mother for the control that her boyfriend had over her. 

 

You can't turn back time now Amy and your little ones need their Mummy to be reliable and responsible.  They don't need to be around their Dad if he hurt you, so don't go back to him again since that seems to be a pattern you've had of leaving your mothers house for him.  Dr Phil will help you and you should grap that help and aim high for yourself and your children. 

 

There's always hope while your alive Amy and you can have a great life, you just have to believe in yourself and stop giving up.  Your Mum loves you or she wouldn't have had you and your babies living with her, you are a very lucky girl to have a good mum (so many in our world don't).

 
May 17, 2007, 2:13 am CDT

Amy you are a disgrace!!!

I have never seen a more childish person in my life!! You need to get off your lazy butt and get out of your mom's house!   And to throw a temper tantrem and tell the audience to "Shut the F**k up," and then storm of the stage like a 2 year old just proves my point.  The county needs to take your kids away and the D.A. needs to press charges against you for child neglect!  The only reason those kids are even close to being safe is because your Mom and Step-Dad are looking after their needs! 

 

And Dr. Phil asked one of the best questions I've ever heard on his show.  If you have no job and no home then why did you have 4 kids?   And your answer was," because I love my kids." Give me a break, if you loved your kids then you would get up when they get up and FEED your kids in the morning!  Not stay out til the early morning hours then sleep til 4 in afternoon.  And for you to say that you don't sleep all day is bull!  We all watched how long you sleep and who is doing your job. 

 

You remind me of a spoiled toddler who wants a cookie and your mom told you No.  And Dr. Phil hit the nail on the head with you. You are a lazy manipulator and you should be ashamed of yourself!  To even sit on that stage and try to tell your mother to get out of your buisness is just stupid.  You should thank God your mom is in your buisness! If it wasen't for her I fear one or all of your kids could easily be dead by now.  

 

Do you know how easy it would be for one of your kids to set the kitchen on fire while your lazy butt is sleeping in the living room?!  Or, heaven forbid, one of them get into a bottle of cleaner and ingest it while your sleeping! 

 

You said, " I can very easily watch my kids while I am laying on the couch."  Are you just that stupid?????  I have 3 kids ....all of them 11 months apart...and I can tell you for a FACT that you CAN NOT lay on the couch and watch your toddlers! Kids that age must have CONSTANT supervision.  It only takes a moment for one of your kids to eat or drink something that could kill them. And you would not be the wiser because your laying on the couch asleep! 

 

Your are the perfect example of a neglectful mother.  The state needs to find someone to adopt those beautifull babies and give them a chance in this life. 

 

Do you even realize all the important things you are missing out on with your kids?  While you are sleeping the day away, your kids are growing up and you are not even witnessing it.  Let you tell you something, they are only babies once and those moments are precious!  But by the time you figure this out, they will have grown and you've missed it all. 

 

To even call you a mother is a lie. A mother provides for her children, mentally, emotionally and physically. You do none of the above. Your just the womb that carried them and gave them life.  It is your mother who is acting in your role right now.  Grow up little girl and do right by your children!

 
May 17, 2007, 5:33 am CDT

Meddling Moms

Thank God I never had to deal with a meddling Mom or Mother-in-law.  Altho with my personality, I  wouldn't let it happen.  I believe parents who meddle in their children's lives, some think they "have to" still be a parent at the same level throughout their stages of life.  As a child, there's a guidance we offer, to them, to protect them. As an adult,  we need to step back and see how well we did our job.  One never stops being a parent but let the children flourish from the lessons we teach them as children.  If they do well, then we did OUR job well, if they don't its "their choosing" and they have to sleep in the beds they make but maybe somewhere along the line a lesson wasn't understood or made clear to them? Remember, their maturity rate isn't comparable to ours until they reach that stage and we will always be a bit wiser because we lived through the stages their just going through.  Till the end of our lives, we NEVER stop learning.

 

I never dictated what my children should do, as adults, but offered advice and my life's experiences that might help them when they reach a difficult decision that can only be their own.  I was never a friend to my children because they have many friends.  I was blessed with the gift of being a parent and that has more power and influence to a child to respect my position with them that I wouldn't relinquish to anyone.  I was given the greatest job in the world and I feel very strongly that it is my duty to do it to the best of my abilities.

 

Why meddle?  Its a waste of energy and time.  If the children want advice, give it to them.  Let THEM come to you, they'll know when they need it.  If they don't, let them figure out "how to" so they can grow on their own.  There's always a right way and a wrong way of doing things.  Everyone has faults, no ones perfect on this earth and why should we judge someones lifestyle because we didn't walk in their shoes to understand why they are the way they are?  I think more so, when we meet someone who came from a different background than ours they have much to teach us, as we do them, wether good or bad.  Boths sides still LEARN something.

 

Meddlers need to back off and take a look at themselves and their lives.  Is there something their lives lacked or are lacking?  Probably.

 
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