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Topic : Self Image

Number of Replies: 1173
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Created on : Thursday, July 07, 2005, 08:53:12 am
Author : dataimport
Do you have a positive or negative self image? Share your struggles and tips with us.

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June 14, 2008, 7:25 am CDT

Improving self image and personal hygiene

Hello there. Name's Denise and I'm looking to improve my self image. My personal hygiene is to say the least, less than stellar, and I want to improve on that the most. How can I do that?

Denise
 
June 19, 2008, 11:12 pm CDT

Self Image

I definitely have a negative self image, unfortunately lol. IDK i just never saw myself as pretty or cute, i was nvr complemented by people my age, just grownups and it always feel like their forcing it lol. Like i had alot of weight, i was a size 18. And then i stopped eating blah blah at beginning of this yr, dropped to a size like 7 or 8, not lying, but i think it was more because i exercised alot, cause i would cheat and eat lol. But umm, then i had went from dress size 14 - 16, to right now i'm 7 or 9. But my parents are stll telling me to lose some weight lol, and it doesnt exactly make me feel great. All the girls i see in school and admire are like size 2's and they have great ways of showin it lol. And i wanna be a size 2 but not getting there lol, and im back to eating cause mainly i like food lol. So yeah, guess im working on that one.
 
June 22, 2008, 1:33 am CDT

Self image and diseases

I recently found this book on www.healingpsyche.com, could be interesting

"Healing Psyche is a treasure trove of rigorous research on the mind-body connection for cancer – all presented in practical ways that both doctors and their patients can access and implement easily. Quite frankly, this book could save your life.”

Christiane Northrup, MD, author of Mother-Daughter Wisdom (Bantam, 2005), The Wisdom of Menopause (Bantam, revised 2006), and Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom (Bantam, revised 2006) 
 
July 2, 2008, 12:41 pm CDT

help

Quote From: ladylorlor

  

   You are causing the scars by picking at your face;  Sometimes adjusting your diet can help.  But I have one suggestion for when it is already there and you want to get rid of it.  And my husband is appauled by pimples, he gave me the suggestion and I didn't believe it would work, until I did it myself.   

    All you have to do is get a Really Hot Clean washcloth and hold it on the pimple until the cloth is cool.  If it is not gone do it again, and up to 4 times I have had to do it with those stubborn ones. 

  

     Now for those stubborn blackheads, you probably won't think of this either but it does work, and it is Lava soap. 

     Use the Lava soap first and then rinse it off with the hottest water you can take, then wipe your face with a Dove cloth, you can even buy them in the Dollar General Stores, They are not to expensive and they are way worth it.  Then rinse your face with COLD water.  That closes the pores.  Your face will now have a shiny, healthy glow, NOT oily shiny Healthy shiny. 

       Apples I am told helps to keep the pimples away and I have been told that unhealthy carbs don't help either, But this I do not know for sure. 

    I have read that chocolate does not cause pimples.  But for me I know that I really increase my sugars and carbs when my period is coming and I believe that might not be so good for the skin. 

  

            Either way you find works for you PLEASE be nice to your face, Picking it is like Beating yourself.  You will scar.  And you have noone or anything else to blame but yourself.  And I have a friend who had many scars on her face because when she gets nervous she picks herself, and She has a hard time not doing it because she doesn't even realize she is doing it until someone points it out to her.  And that is not common because who likes to tell someone to stop picking themselves.  It is just not something we do unless we are personally involved with said persons, Right. 

                   My daughter who is now 17 agrees with these methods and she is doing very well.   And believe me she didn't believe the Hot towel theory until I begged her to stop picking herself and at least try it.  "What could it hurt" I told her,  and I am very happy she listened because she has a beautiful face.  Not that I would think it ok for someone who isnot considered attractive should keep their pimples either of course. 

                Well I hope I can be of some kind of help.  Have a Wonderful Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

                  

In reading your reply I noticed that you have a friend who gets nervous and picks herself.  I also have a friend who is constantly doing this to herself and we don't know how to make her stop.  She will do it whereever and whenever then she feels bad wearing a short sleeve shirt or going out because of the damage she has caused to her face, arms or legs...any idea on where we can turn I really feel for her.
 
July 3, 2008, 12:10 pm CDT

Self Image

Quote From: bstellanow

I am a 51 year old African American woman. I have been happily married for 21 years and I have 2 sons - Brandon (murdered at age 17 would be 34 this year) and Kevin just turned 18 years old.

The most I have ever weighed in my life was when I was pregnant with my children:  147 pounds with Brandon and 149 with Kevin. You many wonder why I can remember my weight with two children 15 years apart. Well, this stands out so much for me because it is not such a great thing to be be thin. At least I don't think so. I weigh 112 pounds and I am 5'6" tall. The most I have weighed without being pregnant is 128 pounds. I get really sad when I see my friends and family disliking their size - I wish I could gain some weight. I know this is not going to be a popular message, but, I am so tired of being skinny I could just spit! There, I said it, I know in this society no one will get it but  it is just as hard for me to gain weight as it is for a person who wants to lose weight. And after hearing, "you are so small..., you are so skinny...., are you eatin?...... a million different times - you will not think being thin is so in!

Understood, my mom also suffers from being too thin.  She herself would give anything to be a much larger woman.  When my mom was pregnant with me she was told she looked like a string bean, meaning her pregnant belly only looked like a tiny bean pod.  My mom also can tell you her exact weight when she had both me and my brother she was so happy with all the swelling and extra weight.  My mom has been teased since she was young and she hates it.  It does go to show that we some how are never truly satisfied, people look at her and wish they were her size and she looks at others and wishes the same.  We all should be happy to be healthy.  Don't stress yourself about your weight, enjoy life.
 
July 4, 2008, 1:21 pm CDT

Self-image ~ Help

I truely believe that my self-image is so bad that it's hard to think that I could like or see myself as a pretty woman.  How do you get your negative self-image to be positive?  I have no sense of self and I hate my bady and all my parts and I wished that I could have some compassion for myself but I don't.  I want to see myself differently but I've been unsuccessful at achieving that.  There's abuse in my back ground and I've tried several ways to escape from the memories.  Can anyone understand?  
 
July 18, 2008, 8:29 pm CDT

I feel your pain

Quote From: rawhope

I truely believe that my self-image is so bad that it's hard to think that I could like or see myself as a pretty woman.  How do you get your negative self-image to be positive?  I have no sense of self and I hate my bady and all my parts and I wished that I could have some compassion for myself but I don't.  I want to see myself differently but I've been unsuccessful at achieving that.  There's abuse in my back ground and I've tried several ways to escape from the memories.  Can anyone understand?  

 I know exactly what you are talking about. I can't find anything attractive about me any more and it makes me want to stay inside and be alone. I feel like no one would be interested in me so why subject myself to rejection and disappointment.

 I am 47 years old and I feel like my life has been lived as far as love goes. I truly think my only pourpose left is working to pay my bills before I die. I hope I'm wrong but I've been divorced for 8 years and not 1 person has asked me out. I guess love isn't really necessary but it sure would make life more exciting I think.

 
July 27, 2008, 12:40 pm CDT

Life's learning lessons fo excercising

Hi - just want to share some thoughts with you all - Recently my life has had a dramatic change - both from a personal standpoint and also from a health standpoint. I won't get into the personal matters ( although this did have some influences on the changes I made for myself). I want to start with my story of going to my doctor for my annual physical and finding out that not only I'm overweight (almost 60lbs)- but also borderline diabetic. This raised the red flag in me and made me decide that is was time to take care of me. I started with the basics - looking to buid my endurance or as I like to call it "My wind" -This brings up Lesson 1 - Build up your inner strength by keeping your mind always postive. I find the mind to be very powerful when it comes to overcoming obstacles both physically and emotianally. I personnally had lost allot of my self esteem from a bad marriage (part of my personal changes). I think we all go through this at some point or another - theres nothing wrong with that (were human and we always will question ourselves) . What I feel is important is that we look at ourselves and realize that there IS SOMETHING GOOD  in us and were not perfect. So the first thing I learned to do is take away the negative  - If someone is putting you down, or saying something that you don't like -Walk away - It's there loss to not to have you around ( I know -easier said than done) - But trust me - its get better with time - and  as you continue to support yourself - Your inner strenght will grow and you will start to see yourself smiling again and your body getting in better shape. Lesson 2 in this learning process is Don't let you body take over your mind when it come to working out .The hardest thing for me was to try not to stop. What I mean by that is your body will try to stop you from excercising because it hurts so much - I'm not advocating to go out gun ho and kill yourself the first time - Take your time - Feel where your limit is ( if you get light headed and feel like crap like I did - then you've gone too far) - Back off a notch. Try to build it up slowly. I think the problem with todays society is we want instant results. Let me tell you nothing is instant when it come to your body. It a finely tuned mechanism that needs time to adjust. If you give it time - IT WILL Co-operate and you will feel the difference and reap the benefits. I hope so far this makes sense - My final learning lesson and I thing the most important one is lesson 3 - Dieting. I know this can be an ugly word for some - But really it's not . To me dieting is eating right and nothing else - You get fat by eating fat - so slow down on the fats. I don't mean taking evrything out - But remeber -like I said earlier - Your body is a finely tuned mechanism and like a car - If you give it the wrong oil or gas it won't run right. So do yourself a favour - If you serious enough and want it bad enough - Take care of you body and give it the right thing. Another important point about this is stay away from eating late - Doesn't help. At last but not least - with all these other things I said - I learned that drinking allot of water helps to keep me strong and keep me from getting hungry when I have those nasty desires. Well there you have it in a nutshell - my life's learned lessons. Trust me these are not word on paper - But my own personal struggles with getting back in shape. So far - I've lost 30 lbs- lost 2 belt sizes and feel the best I been in a long time. Thank you for your time. I hope this help you as much as it has helped me. Always remember to stay strong and positive - Your worth something and you deserve to have the best  -Take care for now
 
July 28, 2008, 6:08 pm CDT

Self Image

Quote From: jpasqual

Hi - just want to share some thoughts with you all - Recently my life has had a dramatic change - both from a personal standpoint and also from a health standpoint. I won't get into the personal matters ( although this did have some influences on the changes I made for myself). I want to start with my story of going to my doctor for my annual physical and finding out that not only I'm overweight (almost 60lbs)- but also borderline diabetic. This raised the red flag in me and made me decide that is was time to take care of me. I started with the basics - looking to buid my endurance or as I like to call it "My wind" -This brings up Lesson 1 - Build up your inner strength by keeping your mind always postive. I find the mind to be very powerful when it comes to overcoming obstacles both physically and emotianally. I personnally had lost allot of my self esteem from a bad marriage (part of my personal changes). I think we all go through this at some point or another - theres nothing wrong with that (were human and we always will question ourselves) . What I feel is important is that we look at ourselves and realize that there IS SOMETHING GOOD  in us and were not perfect. So the first thing I learned to do is take away the negative  - If someone is putting you down, or saying something that you don't like -Walk away - It's there loss to not to have you around ( I know -easier said than done) - But trust me - its get better with time - and  as you continue to support yourself - Your inner strenght will grow and you will start to see yourself smiling again and your body getting in better shape. Lesson 2 in this learning process is Don't let you body take over your mind when it come to working out .The hardest thing for me was to try not to stop. What I mean by that is your body will try to stop you from excercising because it hurts so much - I'm not advocating to go out gun ho and kill yourself the first time - Take your time - Feel where your limit is ( if you get light headed and feel like crap like I did - then you've gone too far) - Back off a notch. Try to build it up slowly. I think the problem with todays society is we want instant results. Let me tell you nothing is instant when it come to your body. It a finely tuned mechanism that needs time to adjust. If you give it time - IT WILL Co-operate and you will feel the difference and reap the benefits. I hope so far this makes sense - My final learning lesson and I thing the most important one is lesson 3 - Dieting. I know this can be an ugly word for some - But really it's not . To me dieting is eating right and nothing else - You get fat by eating fat - so slow down on the fats. I don't mean taking evrything out - But remeber -like I said earlier - Your body is a finely tuned mechanism and like a car - If you give it the wrong oil or gas it won't run right. So do yourself a favour - If you serious enough and want it bad enough - Take care of you body and give it the right thing. Another important point about this is stay away from eating late - Doesn't help. At last but not least - with all these other things I said - I learned that drinking allot of water helps to keep me strong and keep me from getting hungry when I have those nasty desires. Well there you have it in a nutshell - my life's learned lessons. Trust me these are not word on paper - But my own personal struggles with getting back in shape. So far - I've lost 30 lbs- lost 2 belt sizes and feel the best I been in a long time. Thank you for your time. I hope this help you as much as it has helped me. Always remember to stay strong and positive - Your worth something and you deserve to have the best  -Take care for now
One other thing I like to say and is sooo important and I have to re-iterate it is postive attitude - I say this because I want to  mention two important people in my life that inspired me - one - My sister- who died of cancer many years ago and never knew the word "QUIT" - I loved her very much . Another one who just recently past away was Randy Pausch - Truly an inspiration to all - My condolences to his family for there loss - Here's the link to his speech - http://www.archive.org/details/LastLecturebyRandyPausch . Hopefully you will get a chance to watch - Thats all for now
 
August 7, 2008, 2:28 am CDT

We all suffer and with delusions.

Quote From: kbyrd44

 I know exactly what you are talking about. I can't find anything attractive about me any more and it makes me want to stay inside and be alone. I feel like no one would be interested in me so why subject myself to rejection and disappointment.

 I am 47 years old and I feel like my life has been lived as far as love goes. I truly think my only pourpose left is working to pay my bills before I die. I hope I'm wrong but I've been divorced for 8 years and not 1 person has asked me out. I guess love isn't really necessary but it sure would make life more exciting I think.

One of the biggest buddhist beliefs is that we all suffer. When we start believing that we are alone in our suffering, it turns us into victims instead of being spiritual beings having a human experience. We tend to see things through the eyes of the human instead of the spiritual beings that we truly are.

 

I am 47 as well and have gone through many ups and downs in life, like most or all of us and one of the best ways I can describe myself would be that when I realized that all beings suffer, maybe not right now, maybe not tomorrow, but suffer at some point, we will see that it is part of our human/spirit experience.

 

When you only see negative, its because that is your choice of seeing it that way. Every bad experience can be turned into a good one; and every good one can be turned into a bad one. Right? YOu are holding onto the bad but not wanting to see that in your suffering, there is a lesson for you.

 

Love is nececessary.

 

Don't try to talk yourself out of one of most beautiful things that others have to offer. Also, nature, music, poetry, dance, cooking, art, children, elderly, these are all good sources of love. Its true its not necessary to expect to get love from one source (as in a boyfriend) but to get it from all the other sources that are out there. Who is to say that if you find something that makes you feel good, you won't then be open to receive more? The universe does not give us anything until we are really ready. Love will come to you when you are open to it. Only dysfunction and pain will come if you try to see it in places that it is not.

 

You are not the only person that has bills. If you have bills, that probably means you lived a lifestyle that has been out of your range. So you enjoyed it for a while, which was fun, but now you don't. See how something good can turn to something bad on the flip of a switch? Look at childbirth. The pain. Need I say more? :)

 

Don't look for love. Don't look for pain. Be happy you are alive and given another day to make your human experience one that will nourish all beings; stop thinking about how miserable you are, start thinking about how you can make someone's day by giving a bigger tip, or smiling at a person that looks really grumpy (I tend to enjoy that one) and smile yourself more!!!!! Do you know that if you smile, the rest of your body benefits? Try it. Let me know how it goes and remember, we all suffer, you are not alone.

 
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