Topic : Self Image

hope to see you around today...........  hope your doing well.............  about all i can say right now is i am so glad it is friday.................  i wish there was really something to do in this tiny little place.........  hmmmmmmmmmm ....................  maybe i will find something to do..........  i need to because well yeah.......  all i ever do is stay in this room of mine unless i am going to classes..............  does someone ever say something to you and it runs through your mind and you wish you could see what they see..........  hmmmmmmmm yeah anywa enough of that................  i got up this morning and decided since i showered so much later yesterday that i would just wait untiil later to shower today incase i get freezing and it will warm me up.............  yesterday i sure did and was glad i hadn't taken a shower yet........ not that you care about that but sometimes what would i do with out hot water in a shower...........  i always remember how i was in india and onlyl had cold water and how somehow it was fine for me then............  oh but if i got under cold water like that to take a shower now i don't think it would be good.............  i am rambling about shwoers and being warm that is silly..................  i should just stop writing...........  hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm .................... 

I hope that you will feel better.  When I was 23, I lived your life except for the eating thing.  Well, I had a different issue called no money for food.  I think that if I did not have kids I would probably have a problem with food.  People say things to me that just go over and over through my brain, and I can't understand why they say nice things to me.  I wish that I could see myself through their eyes.  I understand about the shower thing.  It is not that cold and I wear heavy sweaters all of the time!  Were your friends talking about your ED or something else.  I really enjoyed your paper and I would highly recommend because of the contents of your paper, that you be screened for bipolar.  Especially if you want all of your days to be Tigger days!  LOL!  That was my goal, but it is not possible.  I think my ex was just diagnosed with it, too.  He is in the hospital still.  Poor Brian.

I don't have money either don't you worry but the food price is calculated in with the school price.......  it is required to eat in the caffiteria...... ummmmmm i must have been talking about my ed i don't remember for sure i will have to look back and see......  not many people at all know unless they have figured it out on their own.  thanks i really enjoyed writing my paper.  I just finished writing a restraunt review and am about to revise a paper i turned iin and forgot to save the changes so i only got an 83 on it eeeeekkkkk!!  Thank goodness i can do it again.  sometimes the way i can't collect thoughts i wonder how i even get that on a paper.  i wold have made an amazing grade if i would have saved my changes on my paper........ poo!!!  well i have a chance to pull the grade up........ can't wait to get the grade back for the paper i jjust wrote..........  hmmmmmm once again i am back to how much can i get done LOL but i am not all hyper and bouncy right now though..........  so ti is kind of strange that i want to get all of this work done that isn't even due yet.........  heheh i am not going to have any work to do next week because it is going to be done this week LOL!!  ...............................................................                 sigh............

yes it was someone saying something to me about my ed..............  sigh..........

I hope that you trust me about this.  The day is coming where you will just be too weak to fight an unnecessary fight and too strong to just give up.  You will look in the mirror in anger frustration and say to yourself, "I cannot live one more day like this.  Not one more day."  You will go to the hospital, because you are tired of hurting all of the time, and you know that you are capable of so much more than you are able to do at this time.  The change is scary, I will not lie.  But the result is something that you can't even imagine.  I never, in my wildest dreams, imagined that I would be capable of the things that I am doing today.  It wasn't easy, but I do not regret my choice to live. 

Smile! 

~Sunshine~ 

i will not really be on today i am going out and i am scared and anxious.  i don't know if i can handle being around so many people.  there are a lot of the girls going out and my room mate asked me to go.  all i ever do when i look in the mirror and see myself is say I hate you.  i want to be able to laugh and joke and be the me i can not find.  i think we are about to go soon.  i'll be on later sometime but it will be a good bit later

it doesn't look like i will go after all.

never mind i am going

     let me just say that i don't know if this is where i should have asked this or not but it looks good to me.  anyways, i am 15 and i have an acne problem.  its not terrible but enough for me to worry about.  thank God i am a girl so i can some what cover it with makeup but what i want to do is get rid of it forever. i know i will have breakouts and stuff but i don't want zits all the time.  i use proactive but i have used it for a few years and it doesn't work that well any more.  does anyone have any suggestions?

i wish i could say i knew what lyou can do but i really don't but i did wnat you to know you weren't being ignored..........  i have had acne problems also and sometimes it just doesn't want to cooperate with us LOL!!!