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Topic : Addiction Support

Number of Replies: 1935
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Created on : Thursday, July 07, 2005, 08:56:39 am
Author : dataimport

Are you or someone else you love addicted to something unhealthy? Whether it's food, alcohol, drugs, painkillers, sex, pornography, or something else, find support here.

 

If you believe you need immediate assistance, please call your local emergency number or crisis hotline listed in your local phone book's government pages. You can also find more help on our General and Mental Health Resources page.


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September 8, 2005, 6:28 pm CDT

Addiction Support

Quote From: the_indian

Maybe it's just me, or maybe I'm missing something, but some of what you're saying doesn't add up.   

  

For one thing, you say you've been on waiting lists for "sober houses".  If you're still using every day, this is nonsensical, since sober houses always require a period of sobriety.  And I'd guess that's especially true if the home allows kids.  You wouldn't even pass the UA they give you at the door!   

  

Then you say you have to be in an inpatient program or you'll go to jail.  Again, why the search for sober houses if you need to be in an inpatient program?  And are you sure that's your only option?   

Since inpatient programs are costly and many can't afford them, I find it a bit surprising that this would be your only choice other than jail. 

  

I mention the above because I truthfully can't tell whether you're genuinely confused or you're misrepresenting the situation on purpose. 

  

Also, are you sure you're really ready to do what it takes to get and stay sober?  I know you want to stop using as a way to avoid jail, but that's not the same thing at all.   And it's not even about the recognition of the damage you're doing to yourself and your children.    

  

It's never hopeless, and there are things that you can do and lots of people who care, but if you're truly reaching out for help, take a few minutes and please clarify the situation.  What exactly do you need to do (legally) and what is the timeframe?  Have you attended any AA or NA meetings?  The people in these meetings have "been there and done that" -- they might know resources you're not aware of.  Is there anyone who can help care for your kids for an extended period of time??   

  

 OK, I WILL START OVER FROM THE BEGINING. iT'S NOT SOBER HOUSES THAT I AM LOOKING FOR, I HAVE LOOKED INTO THEM. I AM TRYING TO GET INTO A 4 MONTH INPATIENT 4 MONTH OUT PATIENT PROGRAM CALOLED NEW DIRECTIONS FOR FAMILIES. iT IS FOR MOTHERS AND THEIR CHILDREN. IT IS A PROGRAM THAT NOT ONLY HELPS WITH DRUG TREATMENT BUT ALSO PARENTING, JOB TRAINING GED AND YOU ARE EMPLOYED AFTER THE FIRST TWO MONTHS.     I HAVE ALREADY BEEN CLEAN FOR THREE WEEKS NOW, BUT I KNOW THAT I NEED TO BE IN AN INPATIENT PROGRAM ASAP.
  
     I AM NOT JUST DOING THIS SO I DONT GO TO JAIL, I HAVE BEEN TRYING SINCE BEFORE I KNEW IT WAS GOING TO BE A PART OF MY PROBATION. THE REASON I SAY IT IS THIS OR PRISON IS BECAUSE I KNOW THAT IF I DONT GET INTO A PROGRAM I WONT BE ABLE TO MAKE IT THROUGH PROBATION. THIS IS MY LAST CHANCE ON PROBATION, IF I AM REVOKED AGAIN THE ONLY ALTERNATIVE IS A PRISON SENTENCE OF UP TO 12 YEARS.   I HAVE GONE TO APPLIED FOR COLORADO WORKS BECAUSE I WAS TOLD THAT THEY ASSIST WITH PAYMENT. I WAS ALSO TOLD THAT CHILD PROTECTION/SOCIAL SERVICES WOULD HELP, BUT WHEN I CONTACTED THEM THEY TOLD ME THAT I NEEDED TO HAVE AN OPEN CASE OR BE FIGHTING FOR CUSTODY OF MY CHILDREN IN ORDER FOR THEM TO HELP WITH THE PAYMENT. I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY THERE ISNT MORE RESOURCES TO HELP PEOPLE THAT WANT TO GET HELP. THEY OUT WAY TOO MUCH MONEY INTO THE PRISON SYSTEM WHEN THEY COULD PUT A LITTLE SOMETHING TOWARD REHABILITATION CENTERS.   THERE REALLY ISNT A TIMEFRAME, I SAW MY PROBATION OFFICER YESTERDAY AND SHE TOLD ME THAT SHE DOESNT CARE WHAT I HAVE TO DO BUT I NEED TO BE IN THIS PROGRAM BY SEPT. 19. OR SHE WILL CONCIDER REVOKING ME.       SHE HAS MADE IT CLEAR THAT IT HAS TO BE THIS CERTAIN PROGRAM AND HAS TO BE INPATIENT.
 
      I WOULD BE WILLING TO GO INTO  A PROGRAM THAT DOESNT TAKE THE KIDS, THE ONLY PROBLEM WITH THAT IS I DONT HAVE ANYONE THAT WILL TAKE MY SON. MY PARENTS WILL ONLY TAKE MY DAUGHTER. THEY HAVE TOLD MEE IF IT COMES DOWN TO THAT THEY ARE PREPARRED TO PUT HIM IN A FOSTER HOME. HIS DAD IS IN COMMUNITY CORRECTION RIGHT NOW FOR METH TOO. WE ARE STILL TOGHETHER AND HE HAS BEEN CLEAN 8 MONTHS NOW AND IS THE ONLY ONE SUPPORTING ME (EMOTIONALY).  IT IS NOT AN OPTION FOR HIM TO TAKE OUR SON UNTIL HE IS NON RESIDENTIAL WHICH COULD BE 6 MORE MONTHS.   I AM NOT WILLING TO PUT MY SON IN A FOSTER HOME!!! I AM TOTALLY READY TO GET SOBER I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE READY. I HAVE NEVER ASKED FOR HELP OR EVEN WANTED THE HELP. 
    I
 
September 9, 2005, 7:27 am CDT

Ok

Quote From: lynzrae

 OK, I WILL START OVER FROM THE BEGINING. iT'S NOT SOBER HOUSES THAT I AM LOOKING FOR, I HAVE LOOKED INTO THEM. I AM TRYING TO GET INTO A 4 MONTH INPATIENT 4 MONTH OUT PATIENT PROGRAM CALOLED NEW DIRECTIONS FOR FAMILIES. iT IS FOR MOTHERS AND THEIR CHILDREN. IT IS A PROGRAM THAT NOT ONLY HELPS WITH DRUG TREATMENT BUT ALSO PARENTING, JOB TRAINING GED AND YOU ARE EMPLOYED AFTER THE FIRST TWO MONTHS.     I HAVE ALREADY BEEN CLEAN FOR THREE WEEKS NOW, BUT I KNOW THAT I NEED TO BE IN AN INPATIENT PROGRAM ASAP.
  
     I AM NOT JUST DOING THIS SO I DONT GO TO JAIL, I HAVE BEEN TRYING SINCE BEFORE I KNEW IT WAS GOING TO BE A PART OF MY PROBATION. THE REASON I SAY IT IS THIS OR PRISON IS BECAUSE I KNOW THAT IF I DONT GET INTO A PROGRAM I WONT BE ABLE TO MAKE IT THROUGH PROBATION. THIS IS MY LAST CHANCE ON PROBATION, IF I AM REVOKED AGAIN THE ONLY ALTERNATIVE IS A PRISON SENTENCE OF UP TO 12 YEARS.   I HAVE GONE TO APPLIED FOR COLORADO WORKS BECAUSE I WAS TOLD THAT THEY ASSIST WITH PAYMENT. I WAS ALSO TOLD THAT CHILD PROTECTION/SOCIAL SERVICES WOULD HELP, BUT WHEN I CONTACTED THEM THEY TOLD ME THAT I NEEDED TO HAVE AN OPEN CASE OR BE FIGHTING FOR CUSTODY OF MY CHILDREN IN ORDER FOR THEM TO HELP WITH THE PAYMENT. I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY THERE ISNT MORE RESOURCES TO HELP PEOPLE THAT WANT TO GET HELP. THEY OUT WAY TOO MUCH MONEY INTO THE PRISON SYSTEM WHEN THEY COULD PUT A LITTLE SOMETHING TOWARD REHABILITATION CENTERS.   THERE REALLY ISNT A TIMEFRAME, I SAW MY PROBATION OFFICER YESTERDAY AND SHE TOLD ME THAT SHE DOESNT CARE WHAT I HAVE TO DO BUT I NEED TO BE IN THIS PROGRAM BY SEPT. 19. OR SHE WILL CONCIDER REVOKING ME.       SHE HAS MADE IT CLEAR THAT IT HAS TO BE THIS CERTAIN PROGRAM AND HAS TO BE INPATIENT.
 
      I WOULD BE WILLING TO GO INTO  A PROGRAM THAT DOESNT TAKE THE KIDS, THE ONLY PROBLEM WITH THAT IS I DONT HAVE ANYONE THAT WILL TAKE MY SON. MY PARENTS WILL ONLY TAKE MY DAUGHTER. THEY HAVE TOLD MEE IF IT COMES DOWN TO THAT THEY ARE PREPARRED TO PUT HIM IN A FOSTER HOME. HIS DAD IS IN COMMUNITY CORRECTION RIGHT NOW FOR METH TOO. WE ARE STILL TOGHETHER AND HE HAS BEEN CLEAN 8 MONTHS NOW AND IS THE ONLY ONE SUPPORTING ME (EMOTIONALY).  IT IS NOT AN OPTION FOR HIM TO TAKE OUR SON UNTIL HE IS NON RESIDENTIAL WHICH COULD BE 6 MORE MONTHS.   I AM NOT WILLING TO PUT MY SON IN A FOSTER HOME!!! I AM TOTALLY READY TO GET SOBER I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE READY. I HAVE NEVER ASKED FOR HELP OR EVEN WANTED THE HELP. 
    I

Where do you live - I work in a mental health facility. We don't do in-patient here but we do do detox. I know that we always have a few County beds here but the waiting list is long. We have a number of people on probation but as long as they can show evidence that they are on the waiting list and attending AA/NA daily with random drug testing the probation department is generally pretty lenient. They actually don't want people to go to jail. So I ask are you actually on the waiting list for this rehab? If you are appeal to them about your situation. Sometimes they can write a letter to your PO to let them know that you are next on the list.   

   

Why is it that your mother will only take your daughter? Is your son a behavior problem? How old are your kids? I can understand your not wanting him to end up in foster care, but I don't understand how a grandparent can take in one child and turn her back on the other.  

   

If you are attending AA/NA and have a sponsor that person may be able to make an appeal on your behalf.  

   

I know I'm pushing the 12 step programs pretty hard - but as soon as I turned my "Will and my life over to the care of God as I understood him" the obsession to use just left me. When I accepted responsibility for my part in my difficulties my difficulties started to melt away. You can do this and remember that probation is not your recovery it's just one of the difficulties you have to face while getting sober. Nothing that happens outside your head has any bearing on your sobriety. You have the strength to get and stay sober.  I had a son late in life at age 40 and it was mainly for him that I got sober. I now get to be the kind of mother I only dreamed of having myself and that is worth all the hoop jumping.  

   

Peace and God Bless   

   

Mischif  

 
September 9, 2005, 11:40 am CDT

need help

Quote From: ladylorlor

  Please don't use money as a means to not get help.  You're husband needs to watch your kids now before he has to raise them because you are dead.  12-20 pills a day is a lethal dose.  Narcotics Anonymous  is a free organization where you can get help.  And I don't know about your state's facilities and medical help, but if I were you I would go into debt to help before my children don't have a mother to take care of them.  I might seem harsh but I just think you really need to get real Right now.  That is a lot of pills and you might feel fine but I will tell you what your Liver is being destroyed by the day and your Heart is too.  And every time you get in that car with your children you risk having, getting dizzy, losing conscientiousness,  a heart attack,  etc.,  and killing yourself, those children and maybe someone else's family, and My grandchild and Son and and his wife live in AZ AND  Frankly: I am taking it very personal that you are putting my family at risk.   

    Please talk to your Husband, go to a meeting, go to a hospital, go to a church do anything to Just please GET HELP!!!!!  

ok i understand where you are coming from but we need money to care and feed for are children....i relize i take alot of them a day for the one the doc does give them to me i dont go buy them from other people i do have friends who give me some...im in pain i was trying to figure out ifi have a problem or not my doc gives me soma and vicdion every 10-15days plus im also taking xanax now as of last week im in alot of pain i have alot of back problems and dont know what to do....id like to get off them but i cant goto a rehab for 30 days or anything i could go for the weekend to get detox off of them ...i dont get high on them when im driving so im sorry to hear you think im putting ur family at risk i dont beleive i am i dont know where im going witht his sorry but all i need is some help does anyone live in az here that know of any meetings for pain killer meetings thanks  

 
September 9, 2005, 12:15 pm CDT

Addiction Support

Quote From: mischif12

Where do you live - I work in a mental health facility. We don't do in-patient here but we do do detox. I know that we always have a few County beds here but the waiting list is long. We have a number of people on probation but as long as they can show evidence that they are on the waiting list and attending AA/NA daily with random drug testing the probation department is generally pretty lenient. They actually don't want people to go to jail. So I ask are you actually on the waiting list for this rehab? If you are appeal to them about your situation. Sometimes they can write a letter to your PO to let them know that you are next on the list.   

   

Why is it that your mother will only take your daughter? Is your son a behavior problem? How old are your kids? I can understand your not wanting him to end up in foster care, but I don't understand how a grandparent can take in one child and turn her back on the other.  

   

If you are attending AA/NA and have a sponsor that person may be able to make an appeal on your behalf.  

   

I know I'm pushing the 12 step programs pretty hard - but as soon as I turned my "Will and my life over to the care of God as I understood him" the obsession to use just left me. When I accepted responsibility for my part in my difficulties my difficulties started to melt away. You can do this and remember that probation is not your recovery it's just one of the difficulties you have to face while getting sober. Nothing that happens outside your head has any bearing on your sobriety. You have the strength to get and stay sober.  I had a son late in life at age 40 and it was mainly for him that I got sober. I now get to be the kind of mother I only dreamed of having myself and that is worth all the hoop jumping.  

   

Peace and God Bless   

   

Mischif  

 I LIVE IN COLORADO. I AM ONTHE WAITING LIST FOR ARA PAHOE HOUSE FOR THE NEW DIRECTIONS FOR FAMILIES PROGRAM.THEY ACTUALLY HAVE 2 BEDS OPEN RIGHT NOW, THEY ARE JUST WAITING FOR THE FUNDING TO GO THROUGH (THROUGH THE COUNTY) BUT THE COUNTY I LIVE IN WONT FUND THEIR PROGRAM. THEY HAVE ACTUALLY GONE OUT OF THEIR WAY TO INTRODUCE THEIR PROGRAM TO THEM BUT THEY GOT SHUT DOWN.  I SPEAK WITH THE THE MAIN PEROSN IN CHARGE OF THE PROGRAM FREQUENTLY. MY PROBATION OFFICER ALSO SPOKE WITH HER THE OTHER DAY. I WAS SENTENCED TO 2 YEARS PROBATION BACK IN 2000, AND JUST RE-SENTENCED TO ANOTHER 2 YEARS PROBATION AUG.22.  MY PO ISNT GOING TO CUT ME ANY SLACK AT ALL, WHICH IS MY OWN FAULT BECAUSE FOR THE LAST 4 YEARS I HAVENT SHOWN HER THAT I WAS TRYING IN ANY WAY. IM SURE THEY DONT JUST WANT TO SEND PEOPLE TO JAIL BUT THE ONLY THING THEY REALLY WORRY ABOUT IS MONEY. I TRIED EXPLAINING TO MY PO BEFORE I WAS REVOKED  FOR THE SECOND TIME THAT I NEED TO GO INTO AN INPATIENT PROGRAM SHE DIDNT THINK THAT I NEEDED TO AND SAID I JUST NEEDED TO GET A JOB.

I CANT TELL YOU WHY MY PARENTS ARENT WILLING TO TAKE MY SON AS WELL! HE IS A WONDERFUL LITTLE BOY, VERY OBEDIENT. HE TURNS 2 ON THE 10TH. MY DAUGHTER TURNS 4 ON THE 19TH.  WE LIVE WITH MY PARENTS AND THEY HARDLY EVEN PAY HIM ANY ATTENTION. ITS VERY HURTFUL TO WATCH THEM TURN THEIR BACK ON HIM WHEN HE IS TRYING TO GIVE THEM A HUG. MY DAD CALLS HIM A LITTLE CONVICT. HE'S A VERY SWEET BABY I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY THEY TREAT HIM DIFFERENTLY!!

I HAVE FOUND GOD JUST REASENTLY, I HAVE BEEN GOING TO CHURCH AGAIN EVERY SUNDAY. I WAS BROUGHT UP IN CHRISTIAN SCHOOL UNTIL THE 7TH GRADE. BUT I NEVER KNEW GOD UNTIL ABOUT A MONTH AGO. IT IS HELPING ME STAY CLEAN BUT I AM COURT ORDERED TO DO AS MY PO REQUIERS AND THAT IS IN PATIENT REHAB. SHE ALSO WANTS ME IN THIS SPECIFIC PROGRAM SHE DOESNT UNDERSTAND THAT I CANT AFFORD IT. SHE DOESNT CARE HOW I GET IN SHE JUST WANTS ME TO BE IN OR KNOW THE DATE BY OUR NEXT APPOINTMENT WHICH IS SEPT 19TH.
 
September 12, 2005, 9:16 am CDT

lynzrae

I hope you see this.  I didn't want to "reply with quote" because you can't cut and paste and this board is getting cluttered with long repeated quotes.   This new format is horrid!!!  

   

Anyway, just a couple of things.   

   

First, going to church doesn't hurt, of course, but for someone who is "gutting out" those early days of abstinence, your time is better spent at an NA or AA meeting.  Like I said, the people there -- especially with NA - are familiar with legal problems.   You keep sidestepping this issue and I'm not sure why, but it's a mistake.  Even if you don't want to hear what they have to say about sobriety, go to hear what they have to say about your specific situation.  They may know of options you're unaware of.  

   

Secondly, you need to be a better mom to your son starting today. I'm not usually the sentimental type, but your comments about your 2 year old being called a convict broke my heart.  Wake up, please!  You have a toddler with both parents absent in one form or another, and grandparents who are emotionally distant.  How long do you think it will take before this poor child is permanently damaged?  Answer:  It's already happened.   You need to think about this, even more than you think about yourself.   Does his father have relatives?   

   

This child is a tragedy in the making and YOU are his mother.    

   

   

 
September 12, 2005, 9:46 am CDT

Hello

Quote From: alexie98

ok i understand where you are coming from but we need money to care and feed for are children....i relize i take alot of them a day for the one the doc does give them to me i dont go buy them from other people i do have friends who give me some...im in pain i was trying to figure out ifi have a problem or not my doc gives me soma and vicdion every 10-15days plus im also taking xanax now as of last week im in alot of pain i have alot of back problems and dont know what to do....id like to get off them but i cant goto a rehab for 30 days or anything i could go for the weekend to get detox off of them ...i dont get high on them when im driving so im sorry to hear you think im putting ur family at risk i dont beleive i am i dont know where im going witht his sorry but all i need is some help does anyone live in az here that know of any meetings for pain killer meetings thanks  

I went through rehab in 1990, and your situation is incredibly similar to that of my best friend.  She took the exact drugs you're taking and she, too, was a SAHM -- she had 2 toddlers.  

   

The truth is, you are putting yourself and your family at risk.  I'm not sure why you're taking Xanax (which I personally feel is one of the most dangerous drugs out there), but you are now taking drugs from 2 separate classes:  narcotics and sedative/hypnotics.   When people do this, the interaction between the 2 classes can cause accidental overdose, even when you haven't "upped" the level of either one.   And this can then cause everything from cardiac irregularities to death, even if you've developed a high tolerance for each drug.  

   

The good news is that there's a lot of help out there for you.  The bad news is, I'm not sure you're quite scared enough or sick enough to do what needs to be done.  I say this because, when you talk about a "weekend detox", it sounds like you don't want getting sober to interfere with your weekly plans!  I've been there, believe me, but I also know it doesn't quite work that way.  

   

Getting specific, you need medical supervision detoxing.  I've been through 2 detoxes and experienced very little discomfort, but I was in an inpatient program where they have the experience to recognize withdrawal symptoms and calibrate the meds to counteract them.    

   

That's not the only way to get medical help but please remember -- detoxing alone doesn't solve your problem.    

  

That leads me to the next thing -- you need to get honest about this with your husband.  But, in doing so, you need to find a way to admit -- to him and to yourself -- that your back pain might have introduced you to these drugs, but you take them now because you're an addict and you want to get high.    

   

As for meetings, NA (or AA, if NA isn't available) has helped the most people I know.  It's scary, I know, and part of that scariness is that you're taking your problem to a higher level by actually discussing it with strangers.  But these "strangers" are there to help, and can probably direct you to low-cost or free local resources that you're not aware of.   

  

   

 
September 12, 2005, 11:17 am CDT

need help

Quote From: the_indian

I went through rehab in 1990, and your situation is incredibly similar to that of my best friend.  She took the exact drugs you're taking and she, too, was a SAHM -- she had 2 toddlers.  

   

The truth is, you are putting yourself and your family at risk.  I'm not sure why you're taking Xanax (which I personally feel is one of the most dangerous drugs out there), but you are now taking drugs from 2 separate classes:  narcotics and sedative/hypnotics.   When people do this, the interaction between the 2 classes can cause accidental overdose, even when you haven't "upped" the level of either one.   And this can then cause everything from cardiac irregularities to death, even if you've developed a high tolerance for each drug.  

   

The good news is that there's a lot of help out there for you.  The bad news is, I'm not sure you're quite scared enough or sick enough to do what needs to be done.  I say this because, when you talk about a "weekend detox", it sounds like you don't want getting sober to interfere with your weekly plans!  I've been there, believe me, but I also know it doesn't quite work that way.  

   

Getting specific, you need medical supervision detoxing.  I've been through 2 detoxes and experienced very little discomfort, but I was in an inpatient program where they have the experience to recognize withdrawal symptoms and calibrate the meds to counteract them.    

   

That's not the only way to get medical help but please remember -- detoxing alone doesn't solve your problem.    

  

That leads me to the next thing -- you need to get honest about this with your husband.  But, in doing so, you need to find a way to admit -- to him and to yourself -- that your back pain might have introduced you to these drugs, but you take them now because you're an addict and you want to get high.    

   

As for meetings, NA (or AA, if NA isn't available) has helped the most people I know.  It's scary, I know, and part of that scariness is that you're taking your problem to a higher level by actually discussing it with strangers.  But these "strangers" are there to help, and can probably direct you to low-cost or free local resources that you're not aware of.   

  

   

believe me i know i have a problem and i believe my husband thinks i do as well but he has only made comments like you take too many pills....the thing with detox i wanted to find a please where i could detox over the weekend then go to groups or whatever i needed to do during the week while my older one is at school and then ill figure out what to do with my toddler...but i cant be gone during the week in a hospital i have no one to help with the kids and my husband has to work so we can pay bills and live in are house....i have found a pill 12step group at a church I'm going to go and try it out.....my husband told me to just stop taking all the pills and go cold turkey he said i may feel sick but nothing would happen to me i don't know about that one.....I'm just lost and scared and don't know what else do to then what he said and attend that meeting thanks for  the feedback  

 
September 13, 2005, 6:31 am CDT

To Alexie98

Hope I got that right. As a real genuine recovering addict and alcoholic I can tell you your husband is right about one thing. Opiate detox won't kill you but if you do it at home you won't be able to get out of bed for day's so you wouldn't really be able to care for your children while this is happening. Most opiate detox takes 5-7 days just to get the drugs out of your system and that's just the start. As someone who has "been there done that" I can tell you that you are "high"  when you take as many pills as you do. You may not think so but the problem is your body doesn't know what sober feels like. Believe me it won't matter to the police or the court system what you think if you get in an accident and kill someone. I have a friend who got into an accident with her kids in the car and one of her children was killed! The other was badly injured. Also the people in the other car were hurt. She served two years in jail and is on 5 years probation. She will forever have to deal with the fact that her addiction caused the death of her baby.    

   

Please don't use the excuse of having to care for your children to stay out of detox or recovery. My son was 2.5 when I did recovery and my husband worked full time while I was hospitalized. My son is now 3.5 and he has a real mother who is physically and emotionally available for him all the time.  

     

I too suffer from chronic pain in my back legs and feet. It's so bad sometimes that when I get out of bed in the am I can't walk and have to hold onto the walls just to get to the bathroom. In sobriety I found the strength to accept that pain is a sign of life and once I turned my will, my life and my pain over to the care of God as I understood him most of my pain went away. Yes getting out of bed sucks but after about an hour or so during which I stretch and walk and take a hot shower I am mostly able to function. Pain medication doesn't take your pain away it just alters your perception of it. In fact when you take pain medication it actually makes your pain worse in the long run.    

  Is there anyone you trust who could help with the kids - like your mother perhaps! I know telling them would be hard but it will be worth it in the end. I remember that when I was getting ready to tell my folks about my addiction I was soooo afraid of what they would think of me. Turns out they were very accepting! I detoxed at home with the help of friends - a Dr and nurse - and I very nearly died not from the pill detox but from the alcohol detox. I ended up in the ER of the hospital where I was a nurse so of course everybody knew after that. I even got fired from my job. Once my "covers" were pulled and I didn't have the worry about others finding out I could just settle in and concentrate on recovery. I learned to accept that what had happened was God's will and while it seemed like the end of the world at the time it was just the beginning of a whole new one. You know I even have told my nieces and nephews who are all in their teens. I did this in the spirit of being an a source of information to them if they should ever find themselves in trouble.    

     

Please consider that most addicts who want to direct they're recovery and do it their way don't succeed the first time and often have to relapse several times before they decide to do what is known to work! I am in your corner and I will be praying for you.    

     

Peace and God Bless    

     

Mischif    

Happy, grateful, and free of all mind altering substances since September 28, 2004.    

 
September 13, 2005, 10:09 am CDT

Addiction Support

Quote From: alexie98

believe me i know i have a problem and i believe my husband thinks i do as well but he has only made comments like you take too many pills....the thing with detox i wanted to find a please where i could detox over the weekend then go to groups or whatever i needed to do during the week while my older one is at school and then ill figure out what to do with my toddler...but i cant be gone during the week in a hospital i have no one to help with the kids and my husband has to work so we can pay bills and live in are house....i have found a pill 12step group at a church I'm going to go and try it out.....my husband told me to just stop taking all the pills and go cold turkey he said i may feel sick but nothing would happen to me i don't know about that one.....I'm just lost and scared and don't know what else do to then what he said and attend that meeting thanks for  the feedback  

Oh, believe me, I understand the juggling act you're going through.  And it's great that you've found a 12 step meeting (although it will be even "greater" once you've actually attended.  I know the mind games of this disease, and locating the meeting isn't quite good enough :) 

  

Here's the thing.  Your hubby sounds like a good guy, but he isn't a physician or even an addiction expert.  When he tells you go to cold turkey - well, you'll probably live through it, but there's a couple of problems with that approach.  One, if you have any pills hidden anywhere in your house (and I'd imagine you do) you will almost certainly give up and take them to get rid of the discomfort you will feel.  I won't even begin to try to explain how withdrawal feels!  And the only think to take that extreme discomfort away are those pills.   

  

Secondly, like I said before, it doesn't solve anything.  You might become "drug free", but that isn't the same as becoming sober.  

  

Also, in terms of recognizing the seriousness of this -- stop and think how you'd react if you found out you had cancer.  Would you tell your oncologist that you could only do chemo on weekends?  Would you be taking advice from your hubby?   

  

Right now, you're being swayed by a false sense of security that you have "control" over your life and your pills.  And this security is reinforced, because nothing has happened YET.  The problem is, it will.  I'm not trying to be an alarmist -- I've just heard and talked to literally hundreds of addicts and alchoholics and the story is the same (although the details are obviously different).    

  

Personally, I was lucky.  A very scary (but relatively minor) medical crisis arose that got me to the ER.  That's all it took.   

  

But because of the drugs you're taking, and especially the addition of Xanax, your crisis may not be that minor.   That's why we're trying so hard to get you to see the seriousness of the situation! 

 
September 13, 2005, 10:13 am CDT

Mischief!

First, I know we're not supposed to do this, but congrats on your upcoming one year anniversary.  That is so awesome!! 

  

On this board format -- why does this thing keep saying I'm angry.  LOL!  I'm not.  But the emote says blank and then it pops up angry.  It's quite rude...haha! 

  

Also, how did you get rid of that weird white box around your name?  Mine looks so strange. 

 
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