Topic : Addiction Support

First of all, since it's you asking for the help and not your son, I suspect he's not ready to quit using drugs.  It's easy to say you want to stop - these are just words.  And all of us who are addicts/alcoholics have used them ourselves, usually to get someone else to stop harrassing us!

Please read through some of the recent posts, especially what coffee has had to say.  You'll find them instructive, because you are in the same situation, only it sounds like you're enabling him much worse if he's still living with you at 27 and not contributing financially.

Also, on the drivers license, I'm not sure what you're saying.  If you're saying his options are limited because he doesn't have ID, he can get a state ID.  If  you're saying it means he can't get to a place of employment, please give  him a bus schedule!!

Even though you don't intend it this way, your current arrangement is merely giving him permission to continue using drugs, while talking about how he doesn't want to.  

In reading your post a couple of things came to mind. (cheapest ones someone found a while ago wanted at least $50.00) Was the suggestion for methadone given to your sister by her doctor? What steps has your sister taken for herself to find out. There are other ways of finding info besides the internet.

If this was awhile ago, why is the idea so important now? What happened to then?

I say this because I'm beginning to understand more and more about the "helpers" in the lives of the addicted. We see the destruction so clear and our love for our family and fear for their lives pushes us to act for them.

I'm beginning to learn the best way we can help them is to help ourselves in understanding the role we play and what "WE" need to do to help in the best ways possible. I'm not saying we need to fork out large sums of money on therapies or rehab that probably won't work if they're not at the stage to "really" act for themselves to stop what they are doing.

As helpers sometimes the best help we can give is not help. Supporting them in "their" efforts is a gift of love. Suggestions of "them" making phone calls to get information and suggestions of feedback for their "plan" to help themselves seem to be more in the area of where we should be.

Sounds like your sister is in desperate need of medical attention! Perhaps suggesting "she" call her doctor's office and have a heart to heart with him is a good place to start. There's nothing wrong with you going with her.

As many of the posts suggest by those who have been there before us, you may want to find an al-anon meeting in your area for yourself.

I really do feel your pain. There is nothing worse than watching someone you love destroy themselves.

There is hope and help out there! May you find the strength you need!

Coffee :)

Denver, CO   

Name: Addiction Research and Treatment Services
Site: 1827 Gaylord Street
Denver, CO 80206 Sponsor: Thomas J. Crowley, M.D.
Dept. of Psychiatry U of CO Med. Ctr.
4200 E. Ninth Avenue
Denver, CO 80262 Phone: (303) 388-5894  

Comprehensive Addiction Treatment Services
Site: 2222 East 18th Avenue
Denver, CO 80206 Sponsor: Pamela J. Manuele
5355 S. Salida Court
Aurora, CO 80015-2537 Phone: (303) 394-2714   

Name: Substance Treatment Services
Site: 320 W. 8th Avenue
Denver, CO 80204 Sponsor: Stephen Dilts, M.D.
777 Bannock
Denver, CO 80204 Phone: (303) 893-7830   

Name: Vine Street Center
Site: 1714 Vine Street
Denver, CO 80262 Sponsor: Thomas Crowley M.D.
1714 Vine Street
Denver, CO 80262   

Name: Western Clinical Health Services of Colorado
Site: 1038 Bannock Street
Denver, CO 80204 Sponsor: Galen E. Rogers
3444 Camino Del Rio, N., Ste 200
San Diego, CO 92108 Phone: (303) 629-5239   

Hope this info helps both you and your sister!  Good luck!  

I've tried a couple of times to respond to you, they don't seem to post and disappear into cyberspace, I hope they appear?  

coffee  :)  

Sorry I read and answer one post at a time, I just saw you added to your post.  

Your not going to like my suggestion but here goes:  

The next time she comes home and passess out, her father should simply call an ambulance and report  a drug overdose. She would certainly get medical attention???????   She won't like it, but then again, she "CLAIMS" she would do an inpatient program????????      

As for worrying about the police?????   I would rather worry about them than the undertaker????  Sooner or later the police may be involved. What if she gets caught trying to buy or sell drugs?????  

Sorry, sometimes I get on my soap box!!  

Hang in there!  

Coffee :)  

Hi Indian, 

Thank you for your advice. I haven't allowed my son to live with me for about 5 years now.  He currently lives with his dad (a nice man, but of no help) and I see him often.  We live in a small rural town with no bus services and the better paying jobs are in neighboring towns. Not being able to pass a drug test to get a decent job is more the problem. So, I guess he will keep going around in this circle and I have to stop making things worse by nagging.  I have bought him books - Dr. Phil's "Life Strategies" , Dr. Wayne Dyer's "Manifest Your Destiny"  to name a few.  I have given him Reiki treatments ( I am a Reiki master), but If he is not quite ready to be healed, there is nothing I can do.