Topic : Bipolar Disorder

I had to put my son in the hospital {mental} sometimes it seems like a waste of time I wish there could be another way to help him he has so much to give and teach people around him...... he is always cheated out of life for being bipolar I would give my life if he could have a normal childhood for 1 day {no med.s, therapy, D.R, lab's } ~thanks for listening~

I'm sorry that you have been feeling low...sorry that I haven't checked the board sooner...

 

I was doing fine until today...our oldest son, who is in culinary school, has run up our cell phone bill...used up all of our roll-over minutes, and went 1270 minutes over, at 45 cents per minute!!  (Over $550)...I talked with the cell phone company, and they reduced it to $125...but still...5600 minutes in one month!!  That's over three hours per day!!

 

And, our son has announced to me that he is gay...what do I do with this??  He will be back in town in another month...I suggested that we schedule an appointment with a counselor to discuss it...all confidential, even from us...just to sort it out...he insists, but I wonder if he has been influenced by the young man he has been spending 3 hours a day on the phone with...he is so easily influenced...yes, I'm in total denial...not that I would love him any less...but I want him to be sure of who he is...he is only 19...

 

Plus, this person is somebody that he met via a chat website, online...and he has broken all of the internet safety rules by giving out personal info and his phone number!!  I am going to the cell phone web site and blocking those phone numbers from his phone...because I don't want him running up any more minutes on our plan...and I'm sure the parents of this young man, who still lives at home, will be equally angry about their cell phone bill!!  The kid claimed to have the same cell phone company as ours, but the website says otherwise...so the calls were NOT free!!  His parents are kicking him out because he is gay...our son hasn't told my husband yet, and he ask that I not tell him...I'll respect his request, but I'm not sure how my husband is going to take the news that our son is gay...like I said, he is easily influenced, and I don't want him getting into something he will later regret.

 

I know that sexual indescretion is a symptom of bipolar disorder (he says that he is not sexually active), but I wonder if the decision about being gay can also be a bipolar trait? 

 

Plus, he is in culinary school, which is costing him $40,000...he needs to be focusing his attention on his school...we have co-signed the loan, so we have a stake in his success as a chef...he is supposed to be setting up his school externship to get three months experience as a student chef in a restaurant...so far, he hasn't found one...because he isn't taking the action necessary to find one.  I emailed him info on several local restaurants, and he has yet to contact them...he will be living at home while he does his externship, because he has no money to get an apartment...he will be paying $500 per month rent, which will go into his savings account, so he can get an apartment of his own in the future.

 

Although, I think that he really needs to think about his other issues before making any decisions...besides, he has never even met this person...how does he know that he is who he says he is...he could be a predator!!

 

So that is my distressing day for you...anybody feel free to chime in...I'd love to hear your thoughts...

 

Becky

Wow, You are going through a lot right now.  It took great courage for your son to share with you that he's gay.  I can imagine how shocking that was for you.  As you know, what your son needs is your unconditional love and support.  BUT He still has to have responsibility in his life.  The steps you are taking sound wise.  Blocking the cell number is a good step.  I hope he finds an externship and can get his life back on track.

 

I haven't read any studies that suggest that being gay can be a result of bipolar disorder.  I think most would say that being gay is something you are born with.

 

I don't know what to say, but I wanted you to know that I cared.   Please take care of yourself during this stressful time!

 

 So sorry to hear that you are struggling so.  Why are you in so much pain?  What is going on in your life?  Post and let us know how you are doing.

So sorry to hear that your son needed to go to the hospital.  You sound like a very caring parent.

Childhood bipolar seems to be quite different than adult bipolar.  The children seem to be under such distress.  My heart goes out to you and your family.  One thing that stands out in your post is the fact that your aunt must get the treatment for her cancer.  This is one time when she needs to put her needs above Ty's.

 

I also wanted you to know that there is a website:  bpkids.org that specilizes in childhood bipolar.  They have a chat site.  Your aunt may find it helpful to talk with other moms in her situation.

I am going through a very hard time right now going from way up to wayyyyyyy down rapidly.  I'm having a hard time maintaining any sort of being level.  Not sure what's wrong or what caused it.  My guess is all the stress of losing our house and moving to here and now the total responsibility of babysitting my granddaughter is getting the best of me.  It's a long story but I just wanted to touch base to let you all know I am okay and not in the hospital.......................yet. 

 

Thanks so much for your concern.

 

Becky....hang in there.  You are such a good person.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.  Keep us all posted as to how you are doing.  You are going through a lot more than most people can stand.  Again...please keep us posted. 

 

Susan

i use tp be here all the time. Well more then I have been in a while. My husband had the net and phone disconnected. I was a moderator on a mental health site and got great not just support but the feeling of giving back to the world. I put a lot of time and effort into what I did and it showed. OUr marriage had been over with even before I took the role up. He constantly is lying to me and I feel guilty for not believing anything he says. He is addicted to porn and will spend as much on it as he can get away with. Our comp was full of it. He has it hidden all over the house. He ignores me when I am depressed. I tried to set up a crisis plan with him just in case hoping never to need it. The moment came when it went very badly and he just smiled and nodded his head. Everyone who knows him thinks he is Mr. Perfection as far as being a hubby is going. They don't see anything at all. He has never physically hit me but he has raped me before. I had a safety plan in place along with the means to get away for good. The other end fell through for many reasons. He screams at me for not being able to take the meds I need cause we can't afford them and don't qualify for help either. Right now I am at my best friend's house for a few days. And yet the weird thing is that I want to go to home now. I feel so lost and confused about so many things. I know I should't feel like I do and I don't get why I do either. I lost a friend who was dear to me cause I asked a question trying to understand something. THey blew up and said I was crirtizing. I wasn't and hadn't meant it that way. They say when you need help to reach out. I did and got ignored on that very thing. I am tired so tired of this stuff. I hope I find a way to bring about peace in my own life. There's got to be a way i just there is. Geesh! Sorry to be the downer on this.

Deb

Deb...I'm so glad to see you here!!  In your situation, it is perfectly normal to feel confused...you've got a lot going on in your life.  It sounds like getting out of the house was the right thing for you...lying is such a hard thing to deal with...you really don't know what you can believe, so you have to assume that everything is a lie...sad but true...

 

Is there a counselor who will see you for free?  It sounds like you could use some help.  The YWCA might be a good place for you to try...they deal with situations like yours on a daily basis...rape IS physical abuse...and yelling at you IS verbal abuse...In situations like yours, many women go back home because it is what is familiar to them...think long and hard before you return to that situation. 

 

There are so many people in need of meds who fall through the cracks...not qualifying for assistance...so sad...I hope you can find a way to get on meds...are there some generics that you might be able to afford?  Lamictal has gone generic (Lamotragine), so I'm sure that its price has gone down significantly.  Wellbutrin has also gone generic (Buproprion), so I'm sure it is more affordable too.  Lithium has been generic for a long time...one of the older meds, but effective for many people...

 

Another source of help on the meds...helping you find a program that you qualify for...might be your local NAMI office...look online under www.nami.org  and find a chapter near your home...they might be able to help...

 

Hang in there...things will get better...

 

Becky

 

 

THE EXPERIENCE TO FEEL THE SAME WAY AS MANY CAN EXPRESS IN RELATION TO THE ILLNESS OF THE MENTAL DISORDER OF BI-POLAR HOWEVER ENCOMPASSED IN A SPIRITUAL REALM WITH GIFTS UNKNOWN TO COMMON MEN THAT SHOULD NEVER BE EXPLAINED OF DISCUSSED WITH THOSE NOT EXPOSED!!!!   I FULLY CAN UNDERSTAND THE ROLLER COASTER RIDE EMOTIONALLY AND THE TWISTS AND TURNS THE PERSONALITIES TAKE YOU THROUGH HOWEVER THE CURSE OF HAVING OTHERS READ YOUR MIND IS NO LAUGHING MATTER ( BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ASK FOR) TRUST ME!!!! STAY STRONG  LOOK AHEAD AND LOOK FOR STUMBLING BLOCKS IN ORDER NOT TO FALL AND AVOID THE HOSPITAL......REMEMBER YOU CONTROL YOU.  YOUR OTHER PERSONALITIES DO NOT THRIVE IN INSTITIONS THEY ARE MANAGED THERE AND MEDICATED. THEREFORE SOMETHING ELSE CONTROLS YOU.  FIND HEALTHY COPING METHODS LEARN ABOUT YOURSELF AND ABSOLUTELY DO NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO BUY INTO SELF DECEPTION.  FOLLOW THE DOCTORS ORDERS AND TREATMENT BUT DO NOT GIVE UP YOUR FREEDOM.  SELF EMPOWERMENT IS A MUST.. DO NOT WORRY ABOUT WHAT QUOTE UNQUOTE NORMAL PEOPLE BELIEVE (MOST OF THEM DON'T SEE BLACK AND WHITE FOR THEM MOST THINGS ARE GREY UNTIL CRUNCH TIME)  HOWEVER IN MY EXPERIENCE I TEND TO EXHIBIT REALITIY 99.999999% OF TIME LIKE IT OR LEAVE IT AND MOST PEOPLE HAVE LEFT.  OH WELL THE TRUTH DOES HURT AT TIMES I RATHER KEEP IT REAL.