Topic : Bipolar Disorder

My grandfather lost his eye sight when he was around 55 and it was detached retina. he withered away to nothing. I had wish i had been closer and see if he could of gotten a seeing eye dog so he could go on his walks ect. He loved to walk to the donut shop every morning.  

Is the glaucoma cureable? or are you going to lose your eye sight? When my meds go crazy on me and everything goes blurry and i cant even drive and it last for weeks it scares the living out of me. i cant imagine what you are going thru. its nice you try to keep a positive attitude even though its hard right now for you.  

Blaze  

My daughter is 15. 

How old is your daughter now?  

She was able to grow out of this? 

I'm so sorry to hear about the place she stayed. We were very surprised we both liked Waco Youth Center so much. The staff really seemed to care and that is what my daughter liked the best, she didn't feel like a number but a individual. We never like the hospital stays, however. They are no help at all. She did learn new tricks there. 

Reading your info. does sound a lot like mine in a lot of ways. I'm not so worried what my daughter tells other, because the school counselors and most of the teachers are aware of the situation and they know me. What does bother me is what my sister tells my daughter. 

I have never been close to my family. It's a very small family, only 1 brother, 1 sister, a mom, dad, 2 aunts, and my 2 living grandparents - thats it. I would give anything if we were close. I am very close to my grandparants and that is all - but they are in their 90's. My sister and I raise our children very different. She would never let her children stay with anyone or even be held by anyone because she felt threatened when they like someone else. makes no logical since - just the way it is. I wanted my daughter to be independant, outgoing and loving to others - and she was. Anyway, she wants all kids to "love her the best" - to her it validates her paranting skills when they choose her. She forgets also the times I have let my daughter go down for a long visit over summer and how exhausted it was having her live with them.  

I know my daughter says bad things, but I would think my sister knows me and the problems well enough to not add fuel to the fire by telling my daughter that I am wrong?? That I must of done something for her not to want to live here with me. I can not and will not put myself and my daughter in a situation where I have to defend myself continuously against false statements, or against the fact that I actually say NO and follow through, even if my daughter is not "happy" about it. 

My daughter has settled back into routine and doing OK. Until I say "feed the birds" anyway. We made an agreement that she would do her chores by 7 pm and for me not to remind her. I don't remind her until hafter 8 and then she goes into a small tantrum, but right now it's liveable. She WILL have chores and the birds will be fed - even if it means outburst by her. 

Anyway - THANK YOU again for listening - it really does help just to vent sometimes.  It would be nice to have family there, but that just not the case.  

That happened to me today...I got distracted by a picture on a wall and started talking about the picture...then I completely forgot what we were talking about...needless to say it was with my vocational rehabilitation counselor...not a good thing.  At least she is a really good person and is doing all she can to help me be part of the working force.   

If I was to read your post and it was not signed...I would say I wrote it...I hope you can laugh with me on that note. 

DOES ANYONE KNOW IF THIS IS BECAUSE OF THE MEDICATIONS?   

Hi There, 

I agree there is a lot of familiarity in what we both say.  My daughter is 27...no she has not grown out of it...and she will not take medications.  With age and maturity she has maintained better control over herself...but she still loses it.  She likes the highs...that's when she feels like she can do anything.  I think she was 15 1/2  when she went into foster care...but my mind deceives me...I think maybe she was 16 1/2.  Now...that is bugging me...I've always said 15 1/2...cheeesh...that's bugging me.   

Being in the Air Force...I was worried...they don't take things like that lightly.  Being in the Air Force we moved a lot...so, I did not always know who was who...new faces...new people a lot of the time.  This was after I retired from the Air Force...it didn't surprise me...but, it did confirm a feeling I had had for a long time...that my daughter made me out to be a monster.  At least then I knew what was going on.   

I had an aunt who often said "who do you love best"...a competition thing.  I think it might be validation for her own being...she may feel so poorly about herself...that this might be validating her as a person.  Being older now and knowing the truth of my entire family...each one of my aunts and uncles were cruel...beyond cruel...they were vicious.  They were nice to their nieces & nephews but not their own children...so, who's their favorite...can you visualize how that would be a validation.  You know...no discipline is abuse as well...a social worker told me that once.  I had a hard time finding the middle ground.   

Well, I thought my sisters would have known me better as well...but, obviously they did not.  We have even discussed this.  My older sister believes she was the best mom ever...she was abusive...her daughters have talked to me about this.  My other sister was a screamer and could get a bit rough.  Me...I wasn't perfect either...I spanked...on the butt...with a belt.  Because I too had mood swings...my daughters screaming became intolerable...I screamed at them then...how dumb is that?  Everytime I disciplined my daughters...I felt the worst guilt/grief ever.  I actually had a counselor for two years who I would talk to...2X a week...reassuring me that my discipline measures were not abusive and of course learning new techniques.  My brothers...same thing.  We were abused quite severely by our mom...my older sister was to much like my mom and my brother...it was better for his daughter that he got a divorce and let his ex raise her.  My other sister and I...changed enough so history won't repeat itself.  But, it was a daily effort.  I know I did alright because my daughters always say you're the greatest mom in the world...my older daughter calls me 5 to 7 times a week...just to say hi.  My youngest daughter got the benefit of a better mom...because after the oldest one was born...I took parenting classes.  I had a hard time coping....I'm having one of those days...getting off topic.     

This is a quote from both of my daughters:  You were a pushover...we knew how to work you and get what we wanted. 

One of the things I did with my daughters (it worked between ages 7 - 13) was a contract.  They had their chores, with homework at the top of the list.  At the time things were supposed to be done we would check there "report card" and put stars on the completed items.  At the end of the week they were able to buy things with these points...some of the prizes were...spending night at friends or friend spending night at our house.  A special dessert.  A special day at the water park (it was a real upset if one didn't get to go).  And other little things.  Maybe something in lines with this could be developed.  Chore...consequence and she would have to come up with a reasonable consequence...again a contract.  You have to choose your battles...and they can't be overwhelming...this was a challenge in our household.   

Yes...it is nice to have family around...only as long as they are not interfering and causing more damage. 

My mind is flip/flopping today...I hope I made sense.       

But I don't have this problem, and I take three medications. So, maybe it's your meds, or your minds. lol. 

j 

Do you have any ideas as to what causes this...other than early onset of alzheimer's?  lol 

I have a lot of physical pain, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue as well as the other issues...Aggie do you have any of that?  I read that fibromyalgia patients have difficulty with memory.  I was tested for ADD...haha...they said "She has ADD...as long as no other medical condition is causing the memory loss."  I'm only concerned if it interferes with my studies at the university. 

First and foremost....BLAZE....good luck and I will be praying for good things for you tomorrow...I'm hoping all goes well.  As soon as you're able please let us know how you are doing. 

Yesterday was an icky day...today is better.  I met with my vocational rehab counselor...I will be having a functionality test done and all of my limitations will be documented.  Then we will go from there and find a career.  What I was going into...we found out quickly that I cannot do it...the physical part of it was more demanding than anyone knew.  So, that's phase 1...then they are going to get me enrolled in the necessary prerequisite math course that must be done...before I go on.   

Have a great day everyone 

Rhonda  

hello everyone,  

thanks for the prayers I believe they help. i couldnt sleep so i got up and  those minutes are ticking away. one more hour before i go to the  hospital.  

my husband and i meant some katrina survivers. they cant get food stamps since they are not idaho residence. there son he is 12 is in the hospital due to a appendic attack. they cant get his fever down. and yet even through all of this they are able to laugh..  

Makes my problem so small in comparison to theres. my prayers go out to them. But thank yoiu all for your moral support. Ill let you know what happents.  

blaze  

I hope it goes well today and that it isn't hard on you. Let us know as soon as you can how it went. We'll be waiting to hear. 

I have been sitting here reading some of these messages and I am so scared for my children. Sometimes I can be on this computer for all day trying to understand this illness and I just get more and more confused. I am learning eveyone is so different and this illness is complex to say the least. I feel like I am going crazy my self. I lost a daughter to suicide 3-16-2004.  She struggled every day from this illness and she would go on and off of meds since she was 13 yrs old. She finally gave up when she was 23 yrs old. She was so tired and worn out. I understand how treatment sometimes doesn't help. I have a fiftheen yr old son who is currently in residential now for the second time. He went when he was 9 yrs old and they had him on so many different meds that he was almost  a walking dead person. They misdiagnosed him so many times. This time he in the beginning of  Dec, 2005 he poured gas on himself and was going to set himself on fire. He is very angry and mean and has been all his life. They now say his primary problem is Major Depressive Disorder, Recurrent, Unspecified,  Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder NOS, this is a secondary problem, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, secondary also, and Bipolar 1 secondary too. ALL THIS SCARES ME! I really don't want to bury another child. Sometime when I see my son I am scared of what I say and do. It seems like he thinks eveything is my fault. My son who is 23 yrs old right now is currently in jail. He medicates himself with street drugs. 2 weeks ago he called me and told me he was wanting to cut himself (he does this quite often) I talked him thru it this time. He is also very sucidal and won't go get help. I dont' like feeling better when I know one of my children are in jail or treatment because I know they are safe. Its a hard way to live. I also have a 18 yr old who is a senior in high school. He excels in baseball. He has been diagnosed with mild bipolar in Dec. 2004. He wanted to commit suicide and be with his sister. They put him on Lexapro and Depakote. He got off these meds 6 months ago and was doing fine until the problems with his brothers started again. He asked me if I could try to get him back on meds again. I am calling the doctor as soon as the open. He does alot better when he is playing baseball off season is hard on him. He is looking into a college that plays all year round. As you can tell it seems like bipolar hits people is so many different ways and there is so much to understand. I feel like I am trying 24 hrs a day trying to keep my children ALIVE! If somebody can help with some information It would be very much appretiated.