I tried to reply to you once before, but I guess it didn't work. I can only imagine the hell that you and your family have been through. It must have been hell during the time that your son was gone and you didn't know how he was doing. I am happy that the people at the party were understanding and able to remain calm, because as you said, that would have escalated the situation much quicker. It is unfortunate that your husband jumped in the pool with your son, and lucky that neither was hurt at that point. Although I do see his point where he was angry. Destruction of property, especially something you worked hard for doesn't just hurt financially. I can't imagine the terror you went through, not to mention the hurt you must have felt when you son held you with the knife. It is lucky you were able to escape from you. And the horror you must have felt seeing your son injured when they were finally able to take control of him. I don't think they did him any good by putting him in jail though. I do agree that he needs to be accountable for his actions. Obviously, he was not in his right mind when he did what he did. I am happy to hear that you remained by his side. I guess the reason I feel this way is I'm an R.N. at the jail here. I see so many of the inmates with mental illnesses, mental delays, illiteracy, horrific events in their lives. Some of them just don't belong there. This isn't to say that I condone any of their behavior or say they are not accountable. Only that I feel they need more than to be just locked up. The idea of jail is supposed to be rehabilitation, and for some being locked up and punished just isn't going to do it. The origin of the problem causing their behavior needs to be fixed for any changes to occur. I think the best thing you did is get him out of there and into a mental facility where he could get the help he so obviously needs. He may be there a long time as it may take a long time to get him stabilized/treated etc. He may not be happy about it now, but someday when he is healthier and maybe even able to have a productive life because of it, he will look back and thank you for it. The best gift you can give him at this time is your love and support. When he is released it is very important that he continue taking his meds as prescribed and going to any other therapy, councelling, psychiatrist treatment that he needs. If he is not compliant, and incidents occur, you may very well have to call the police/get medical help. Although it is hard, in the long run, it is really for his own good, and you must keep safety for all in mind as well. Sorry to hear that your husband is not so supportive and is in a way making this even harder on you. I'm assuming this is not his biological child? Although I do understand where he is coming from. People with a mental illness can be very difficult to deal with and you guys have been through some serious traumatic events. It is hard for many people to understand about mental illnesses. Also, I want you to remember to take care of yourself. This is extremely important. You must take care of yourself and keep yourself healthy if you are going to help anybody else. You must make time for yourself. Even if it's only a 15 minute bubble bath. If you want to talk one on one, I am always willing. My e-mail/MSN is kalie1000@hotmail.com.
Kalie
