Topic : Bipolar Disorder

My husband was diagnosed with bipolar disorder a year ago. Before I realized it, he had put us $95,000 into debt.  Now that he has been diagnosed and I have read up on bipolar all of the signs were there, but I didn't know  what to look for then . He was staying up late at night (part of being Manic) and shopping on the Internet.  He opened credit cards that I was unaware of, and was very good at hiding things from me. 

We don't want to file bankruptcy and at the same time don't have financial support from our families.   

If anyone else has run into the same problem....PLEASE HELP!   I am open for any suggestions 

That so many people with bipolar disorder do. As soon as you feel better, you stop your meds. Why do you think you were feeling better? You want to be normal, but I have a news flash for you. You are not normal, you have bipolar disorder. The only way you will ever function is to take your meds, daily, every day, for the rest of your life. Period. Until you are willing to accept this immutable fact, you will continue to have problems. You cannot go off and and on meds, you cannot go off your meds when you feel better. Your meds are what make you feel better, and without them you will not do well. Period.  

Sorry to sound so rough, but reality is not always a nice thing. And that is reality. Meds or being controlled by your disorder. Your choice. And you are the one who gets to make it. No one else. 

You know exactly what I am going to say--you just want someone to say it to you. Get up off your butt and find something to do. Keep going to your doctor and keep hunting for the right combo of drugs. 24 years ago I was right where you are, but I wouldn't let a disease beat me. I kept fighting for five years to find the right drug. I had to check myself into a hospital to get it, (back then there weren't many drugs and the doctors kept telling me that lithium was working, I just wasn't cooperating) but I found it. And I started over. I got work and I got it in a new field. I became what I had always wanted to be--a writer. I made more money than I ever had before. 

You are letting a cruddy disease beat you into submission. You don't need brains scans; you just need meds. There is the correct med out there for you, and as I told someone else out there, when you find it it will be like a key fitting a lock. It will make you feel so much better. But lying in bed will get you no where. Fight for yourself and fight for your life.  

I am a 34 year old woman recently diagnosed with Bipolar I w/agoraphobia and severe anxiety.  Before that diagnosis it was just Bipolar I and before that it was severe clinical depression with psychotic tendencies (toward myself).  I have been mentally ill for as long as I can remember and knew something was wrong with me as a teen.  I was severely depressed, I lied, took drugs, left the house in the middle of the night to walk around, stole my parents car...and so much more. 

I started seeing a psychologist when I was sixteen after a failed suicide attempt.  I saw this particular psychologist for about five years before he finally figured out that I could probably use some medication.  My psychologist referred me to a medical doctor that was in his building who diagnosed me with the depression and put me on Prozac along with Klonopin for anxiety.  I felt great for once in my life.  I took the medication and then would stop taking it because I felt good and thought that I didn't need it anymore or because I just flat out forgot to because I felt good.  It took me awhile to realize that just because I felt good didn't mean that I didn't need the meds.  During this time of taking prozac I was put on various other medications because I would stop one and my doctor would put me on another one in case the one I had been taking had stopped working.  During the course of approximately six or seven years I had been on Prozac, Paxil, Efexor, Trazadone, Zoloft, Klonopin, Xanax and some others that I have forgotten.  I was taking these meds and then I would go into a manic state because I had no mood stabalizer to bring me back down like Depakote or Lithium. 

I moved to Dallas, TX and had a nervous breakdown and was hospitalized after going on a drug binge for two weeks.  During that hospital stay I was diagnosed with Bipolar I and was prescribed Depakote and Prozac along with Klonopin.  I was devastated to learn that I had this disease and fought taking the medication for awhile until I realized that it is no different than say having to take medication for another illness like diabetes.  So, after realizing that I wanted to feel better and just looking at the situation as if I were taking my daily vitamins I started to get better.  Then I lost my insurance and had no way to pay for a doctor or medicine.  I crashed hard and became extremely agoraphobic.  I hated it.  I found a place here in Texas called MHMR (Mental Health/Mental Retardation) that helps on a sliding scale for people who don't make a lot of money or whatever the situation may be.  I am now diagnosed as Bipolar I w/agoraphobia and severe anxiety.  I take Depakote and Prozac for now and feel pretty good.  I have no side effects from either drug and like that a lot.  I do notice that I am less creative when I am on medication but that is about it. 

I feel for anyone who suffers from mental health issues and know how you feel.  It does feel helpless when nothing seems to help.  But, if you can find that right combination of medication along with therapy if you need it or family support then the world can seem like a new place and a pretty wonderful one at that. 

I think that family and friend support is the number one key to getting better and staying better.  If your family is not supportive then turn to friends.  

In the end I know I have this disease...I look at it just like that...I have this disease...it doesn't have me. 

I have been on the boards before in other areas but just found this one because of the show last night.  I have read all the posts and I feel like I have finally found people who really understand.  As I stated in another post my boyfriend of 12 years is really supportive of me since I have started receiving treatment and I really appreciate his patience and everything with me but it's really not the same as he truly doesn't understand what I go through on a daily basis.   I am so tired of constantly trying to be a different person, trying to portray a persona of being okay.  My mind doesn't stop, it continues like a merry-go-round.  Sometimes I just wish I could fall asleep and never wake up, just make it all go away.  My mind is my worst enemy. 

These boards however, kind of put me at ease as I know I am not alone.  There are people out there who are going through the same things, feel the same things, think the same way.  It also makes me sad though to know someone else is living this hell.  I've read the posts of some who are doing very well on their meds but they still have days that are not good.  I guess I am expecting too much from the medication.  My thoughts were that the meds would make everything go away, make everything better but I guess that's just not the case.   

I don't know, anyway, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who shares on this board.  I may just become a regular.......  

I actually live in Lewisville right now but have lived all over the DFW metroplex...I love it here...I am originally from El Paso, TX.  My father retired there from the army when I was about eight years old. 

Do you ever come and visit Dallas? 

Now you're letting the stigma that gives us so many problems get to you. It's an illness like diabetes or arthritis is an illness. You get diabetes, you take meds. You don't wonder how you got it or why God gave it to you. It's just a fact. Bipolar disease is a genetic illness that you get because someone in your family tree had it. It's just a fact. Everyone in this world has something they have to deal with. We get bipolar disorder. We just have to do the best we can.