Topic : Bipolar Disorder

Schumy, there is hope for you.  Please do not give up...you have put up a courageous fight against the depression and the other things you have to deal with.  Your pdoc knows what is best for you.  Do keep up with the therapy.

I had to get beyond my past...as I've posted before, I was molested as a child, and physically and verbally abused.  The anger and depression associated with this followed me for a lot of years.  With counseling and the right meds, I have learned to get past it and live my life.  You can do it...it will take time.  You will have to endure more feelings dredged up from your past, but you WILL come out on the other side feeling better.  I have much fewer nightmares than I used to, and usually the nightmares can be tied to current events, and mania.

Please keep going, and hang in there...you can do it....take care...Becky

I now know what they mean when they say they feel alone. Who are they? They are your friends family, and everyone else. Since I was diagnosed with bipolar my life and way of thinking has changed dramatically. I'm a 32 year old man, I created my buisness 14 years ago striaght out of high school and employ over 50 people. Now I lost the drive to succeed, I lost the value of money. I now go to work because I must provide for my wife, 4 children and the 50 families that depend on me.

Every minute of every day is a strugle for me,it takes everything I've got to maintian what the doctors call balance. Its has been 5 months since I stopped the medication. On the outside I can maintain the balance I need to exist in todays society, but on the inside I'm like my W.W.2 veteren father only I'm a prisoner of the silent wars in my own mind. Maybe the meds can help some people but the funny thing is no one and I mean no one knows for sure what the meds accually do to you. I was on some pretty heavy medications.   because I have every aspect of Bipolar up down sideways if you suffer from this you know what I mean.

I'm a dreamer, they say an out of the box thinker. My problem is one day I went so far out of the box I almost didn't come back in. I met some very interesting and helpful people  in my journeys of bipolar now that I've come to terms with my illness as I'm sure many have.  Now its up to us to help others by helping ourselves and fighting Bipolar with Bipolar. 

I'm trying my best not to ramble because my mind race's faster then a horse track. I found that thier are alot of people like me. Some more and some less confused.  I'm already in the process of opening a non-profit organization (clinic) in my area to help bring people together and fight this crippling disorder. If you or someone you love is trying to battle this remember your not alone. and your not CRAZY. You simply need the right information on how to cope and what does the meds accually do for you. Rremeber some meds can help and some can drive you father into yourself or even worse Suicede. The name for this new company is nor searched yet but if the name is allowed it will be Cape Breton Bipolar Society (crazy thoughts .com)

Information will vary because we are all like fingerprints we are all different. I believe as someone seeking for answers we need a safe place to obtain and share this infromation.

In closing I now know why my father went to war in W.W.2.  And why at the age of 59 he gave me life. Dad I can't remember you because I was 4 when you died. But I'm darn proud of you.  I just hope that this pen is mightier then the sword and helps other P.O.W.S. trapped in thier own minds. Dad you can't see me now but I hope this new path I'm taking will make you proud. your son Jim.

thank u all for ur advice. yes faith i do see a therapist  and a psychatrist  i have been for three years now and i dont think that my mom doesnt get it  i just think she isnt sure weather or not  to believe me .  of the past few years  i have lied to get out of the hospitals by saying that i faked it all. which of course was wat my parents wanted to believe and i knew it  so i took advantage of it. im very tired today  it has been one of those days with my family.  since i got up i automatically felt like  i could do nothing right for them ...... that usually take half a day  atleast  and then my dad came home and was on me about every little thing and we fought . sometimes i feel like it doesnt matter wat i do or say ill always be wrong and will never be good enough

                                                                                                                           amanda

So sorry you had a bad day.  Try to remember that your day/thoughts are clouded by a depressive brain.  Sometimes I have to remind myself that the "depression" is talking and skewing my view.  But that's not to say your feeling aren't real....they are...you are hurting...  (((Amanda)))))).

I'm glad to hear that you do see a therapist and a psychatrist.  It's important that you tell them ALL your feelings.  Don't hold anything back.  They need to know the whole you to help guide your progress.  As far as your mom is concerned, it sounds like it will take time for you to gain her trust back.  Don't let that stop you from telling her all the time how you are feeling.  And you don't really need me to tell you to STOP HURTING YOURSELF.  Take ONLY the meds that are prescribed and at the dosage prescribed. 

I wish I had the words to make it all better Amanda, but I don't.  All I know is that things can and will get better as long as you continue to take the steps.  Keep posting.  We love you.

I confronted my aunt last night about why she had told me i am a silly girl and explained that i am ill and didnt really know what i was doing and lost the plot . She told me that i am silly and that anyone would call me silly and selfish. I told her that this was a put down and that all i wanted was some support and she screamed at me about how i should be gratefull to her for organising the funeral, she said im very selfish and is completely ignorant about my mental state. She also said that she had called all of the nurses and social care workers and told them the truth about me. I asked her what was theis truth and she said that no one believes anything i say. The family have taken my daughter away from me as they dont want her to be around me and i have no control over anything. The nurses called today to give me meds and told me to ignore her hurtfull comments but im already grieving the loss of my mom who i loved dearly. No one get where im coming from at all apart from the shrink and med team.

really going through a rough spot in your life.  You must try to emotionally detach from those who don't support you.  They truly do not know about being bipolar.  I go through the same thing sometimes.  I just don't respond to their ignorance.  Instead you need to listen to the nurse and social worker.  You didn't say whether you are seeing a psychiatrist and therapist or not.  They will help you a lot. 

Stay away from the sleeping pills or anything like that.  They are pretty dangerous while you are in the state of mind you are right now.  You can accidentally overdose, which you know by now.  A psychiatrist can prescribe meds that will help you safely.  Do find a support group.  It's good you are writing on this board.  That might help too.  Keep in contact.  We here support you.

Susan

last night i had so much trouble sleeping  which i do anyway  but typically  it takes me along time to feel tired and then another hour or two to fall asleep so im usually up to 2 or 3 in the morniing  but last night was different   i fell asleep about nine  but   when i  woke up at one  to use the rest room , i noticed that my hands felt like they were on fire. this didnt concern me to much because they often feel like this. they feel that way even now but wat did concern me was that my feet , lower legs, stomach , lower arms , and face felt the same way, i get hot sometimes but this was from the in side   it was literally coming from me . the rest of my body was ice cold as if the bold had rushed to those particular places. when i went back to bed i couldnt get comefortable  i was hot  inside and out  i felt like any minute id through up or pass out  i was sweating  from places i usually dont sweat from.i tired taking the covers off and changing my clothes but nothing helped finally at three thirty i gave up and came out to the living room and watched tv.  i later told my mom about it and took sleeping pills so i could get some rest . i woke up anxious and stressed and hot im not sure wat this is  but id  sure like to find out !