Topic : Childhood Sexual Abuse Support

Quote From: mbaisden

 I want to start by saying that our children should be the most precious things in the world...As a victim of childhood sexual abuse, I understand what "Grace" will go through in life. I was molested at the young age of 5 through about 9 years of age.  It happened most every night or every other night...As a child, when this happens to you, it completely strips your innocence...and it is something that you live with on a daily basis.  My abuser was sentenced in 1994 to 10 years in prison, of which he served about 4 years, was parolled and violated by molesting another child, and was sentenced in 2001 to 15 years. After being sentenced to a total of 25 years in prison, he is now walking the streets again..This is my biggest problem with the system, the punishment for hurting a child is not severe enough, to make people stop and think about hurting a child. They can take away a child's innocence, and then be able to walk around free..It doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me.

Quote From: fefe22

          You know i blame my mother to this day about my rape mainly because he was her "party" buddy and she brought him into her house knowing she had three girls with no father basically having to take care of themselves because she was too drunk or high to do it.  I always protected my little sister who was 4 years younger than me but when I was 14 I ran away to my father's parents, ( who I was very close to ) , and my little sister couldn't come with me.  But I promised her that I would come back for her and I really tried by going to CPS and telling them the living conditions and everything that had happened to us, but no luck.  I never fulfilled by promise to my little sister who I spent my life up until then protecting and to this day I feel so guilty because after I left she got molested by my mom's boyfriend. I have always taken care of myself and been independent, but I'm still broken inside.  My family never sought professional help for me and I still have never received any.  It's been a long road and angry, destuctive road and still has no end.  Forgiveness is the hardest thing in the world, and I still hold on to the pain and hurt and haven't figured it out yet.  I'm 26 almost 27, haven't had kids because I'm so scared that they would go through what i've gone through.  I have been engaged for 3 years and not close to a wedding date at all, never been married before, and have always just tried to take care of myself without anyone's help and I think people out there need to realize that they need to be helpful to their friends and family because victims really need it.  Im so sorry your mother was like that but I really dont have faith in mothers personally, and teachers, other parents, family members need to quit ignoring the signs of abuse and being scared or selfish and do something about it.  This world is getting out of control already and everyone needs to pull together and make a difference even if its in one child's life.

                        I have never thought that I have to have a man to be happy, personally I am more of a loner i guess that way its my fault if i let myself get hurt, but every body is different and my way is probably not the best way but it works for me i guess.  You just take care of yourself .

Quote From: tammydavis

In crossville,Tennessee judges,cops,department of children services let child molesters go unpunished and take the word of the abuser and don't take into consideration child involved they send them back into the abuse.Everyone that should be protecting the child let her down.And took the rights of the parent that stood behind her just because he did not have substantial evidence,basically didn't see it happen even though child repeatability spoke of the abuse. 

Quote From: renee50

I just want to say thanks for the encouragement.It meant alot.Dont ever be afraid to talk about the Bible and god.I believe in God also and attend church every Sunday.I wish what you were saying I could believe it with not only my head but believe it in my heart and too be able to believe God really does love me.I would give anything if I could have that faith and really fill safe and secure and experience what it fills like to know Im loved.All my growing up my Mom would always indicate that God couldnt love me either because I was such a bad girl.So Ive always looked at God as someone over me with a whip waiting for me to mess up.I know its up to me to reprogram my mind and to read these scriptures and except them.One day in therapy I was ask to close my eyes and think of a safe place, were i would like to be at and he went on for awhile asking me to think of different things about that place.I racked my mind and finally told him I cant find a safe place.When i saw i had a reply to my letter i was almost shaking.I know it sounds silly but I feared it was someone to tell me how foolish i was so Im glad I was wrong.I wish i could flip a switch and everything be o.k.I fill Ive been in a mind prison all my life and I wish i could excape it.I will read these scriptures again that you gave me and try to believe its for me too.

Quote From: loveme1981

 Hi I am new here

Iam 25 years old and now I am going thought the sexually,mentally ,phsically abused by  My father, uncle, mother, babysitter, and two guys that I just now.  I don't know what I am doing? Why I am putting myself  thought this all it hurts to be going thought Ididn't want  to be doing any of this Help

Quote From: maryann62

Today's show is very upsetting to me.  I am a 62 year old woman who was sexually abused by my grandfather when I was a small child.  The abuse began when I was very young, probably at about age 5 or so.  This abuse continuted until I was almost 13.  Luckily, we lived in different states, and only saw our grandparents during the summers.  I never told anyone.  As a matter of fact, there are only two people today who know about this.  I have struggled with this my whole life.  The older I get, the more I realize how much these  events shaped my life, from my self concept to my interactions with others.  This is something that an apology cannot cure.  This is something that is never forgotten.  This is something that determines the course of one's life.

 

One of the things that preys on my mind is the knowlege that I was not the only one.  There were many grandchildren in the family.  I feel certain that others were also abused.  I feel tremendous guilt about that .  The only thing that is of any comfort to me is the fact that at age 12 I found the courage to put a stop to these incidents.

 

I see no real remorse in the man on today's show.  Who is to say this poor child was his first or only victim?

Quote From: jenn1862

 When I reported my sexual abuse to my mother 14 years ago at age 9 , she denied me  and smoothed it over with "You  wouldnt want your daddy to go to prison would you?" and drove me by a prison.  And to add to that my mother's friend wrote me a letter said to me "Settle down, you just need to learn that your daddy shows his affection in different ways"  Than she wondered why I grew up with mental problems and emotional issues, on top of the fact that me and my sibling were already being emotionally and physically abused.  Than denied me when I was molested as a teenage by a fellow classmate.  When I see shows like today, it brings back such rage,even though I decided to 'forgive' 6 years ago.  I thought i had dealt with it , but after feeling so much rage during the show today, I dunno.  And so mine and my parents relationship is a big facade for other relatives, to them it was a "I didnt see anything happen did you?" and we moved on.  And other relatives wonder why i dont want to attend their up and coming anniversary party or any other function for that matter.  can anyone relate or give me support on how to move on for good? Sometimes  I wish I could forget.

Quote From: odarby

Don't go in angry, or with any expectations. 

Loss of control is of no help to you, and depending on how deep of denial your abuser is in.  You may not get through.

 

Unfortunately, the only way I've been able to confront my abusers was through the police.  But because of how old my case was not much was really done.  Although, I'm hoping it was enough to keep my younger cousins safe.  But because nothing was done, my grandpa went into denial big time, and on a couple of occasions I got a huge taste of how deep it went. 

 

I'm working on a letter as I refuse to talk to my grandpa in person.  I plan on telling him that I remember what he did, how long I've remembered and how much he has hurt me.  I don't think I will ever be able to fully forgive him.  Especially, since he has denied what happened and lied to my family about what occured.  I have long since learned that I can't forget about what happened, and probably will continue to remember long after he is gone.  I hope he is proud of himself.  As he no longer has me as a granddaughter.

 

Quote From: stillconfused

When I was 5, I was raped by a family friend, and a kid in the neighborhood around age 6 or 7. Then when I was 11 or 12, my older brother(13) would have me and my little brother (10) have sex. My mother, aunt (who was an alcoholic, and who was closer to this person), and my grandmother found out when at the age of 16 I told my brother and begged him to keep it a secret.  He got real angry and confronted my mother.  No one ever said anything to that man, and they kept letting him come around. How could my brother be so mad after what he did?  Still at 16, one of my sister's boyfriend's tried to molest me - my mom, younger brother and I were at her place sleeping in the room with her kids. When he came home he came in the room where we were, closed the door and cut on the light.  When I felt something touch my skin (he had unbuttoned three buttons on my night shirt) I jumped up and as I turned around he was pretending to get out of her daughter's bed.  I was so scared!! He looked at me, cut off the light, unlocked the door and went into the bathroom.  I jumped out of the bunk bed, ran into the livingroom and told my mom we had to go home now!  He came out of the bathroom and went into my sister's room and closed the door.  We left and when we got home I told my mom.  When we came back to tell my sister he had left.  My sister told me I must have been dreaming.  It didn't stop there.  My cousin's husband also tried to molest me when I was 16, but I confronted him and told him if he ever touched me again I would tell my mom!  I can still see these things happening to me today as clearly as if I'm looking in a mirror and it was yesterday.  I have moved on in life but rape and molestation affect you for the rest of your life.  I have been to psychologists and psychiatrists and have never told any one of them these things.  I feel ashamed and feel that I did something to make these individuals do those things to me.  Especially when I was 5; he told me to get the vaseline and I did! These things affected my relationships and even today I hve very few friends.  My motto - TRUST NO ONE!!

Quote From: samtaylor80

Hi I am very new to both posting messages and talking about my problems so please bear with me. I was sexually abused by 6 very close relatives and family friends from the ages of 7-16,  beaten by both my step parents and severely neglected by  almost every one I looked up to & disowned  by both my own parents. I had forgotten most of this until 1 year ago when  my mother had a major guilt rush and decided to start asking the questions she shouldve asked 10 years ago. I am now having flashbacks, depression & smoking marijuana just to get by. For so many years that part of my life was padlocked & bolted behind an unmovable door and now it consumes my every thought. There is no escape. No body I know including my soon to be husband knows what happened to the extent it did. I fear if I start talking no one will believe me or think I am exaggerating. I also fear all the lives that will be affected by me opening my mouth.

I feel like I am drowning. PLEASE SOMEBODY HELP ME!!