Topic : Fears, Phobias and Anxiety Disorders

 OCD is totally misunderstood. The symptoms of the illness manifest themselves differently for different individuals at different times. The obsession with the red backpack,the weather,driving,fire,and the subsequent compulsive behaviors (checking on the backpack,glued to the TV,checking electrical cords) is the same as a person who has a germ obsession and compulsively washes their hands.

I would absolutely ask your therapist about CBT. Actually, you most likely have already practiced it yourself without realizing it. The fact that you are able to drive now means that you successfully changed your own thought patterns and behaviors regarding driving.

CBT does not completely get rid of irrational thoughts, but it does help you recognize the thoughts as irrational and change them before they spiral.  A good medication will control the physical symptoms (panic attacks,a feeling of being "out of body",etc.) and in many cases will eliminate certain obsessive thoughts. Sometimes meds make you feel really weird for the first few days, so be prepared and try to get through the first week. 

An illness is never easy on a spouse, whether it's Cancer,Alzheimer's, or OCD. The best thing you could ever do for him is to focus on your treatment and learn how to live with your illness. He may do well with a bit of therapy too while you are going through this. Perhaps you could take him to a therapy session so he can learn more about your illness and how he can help. Most therapists would be fine with this if you ask them.

Big Hug!! :)

 It's really strange with the driving. From the time I was 16 I refused to drive (unless it was on a dirt road, out in the middle of nowhere)  I'm 25 now, and honestly, I really don't know how I convinced myself to begin driving.  I just knew my husband didn't/couldn't go to the grocery store with me.  We quite literally had nothing left in the house to eat, and well... I wasn't going to let my daughter starve.  Hehe...I'm so proud of that fact--but I also won't go off of the set route I have--heh... My therapist and doctor are along the route, so I'm good with driving there! 

Well, even now I know my thoughts are irrational, the what ifs are likely not going to happen-- (99.8% sure I am NOT going to burst into flames  XD ) but I just don't know how to get rid of them...But it sounds like that's what CBT is for.  Well--thank you so much for the information, and the boost of confidence-- I certainly need it.  The last few days have been really hard on me, and it helps to have someone who understands what I am going through to speak with about these things.

MAD AT ANXIETY

Why do you do this?

Why are you always here?

I fight you everyday!

Aren't you as tired as me?

Wont you just go away and let me be free?

Why wont you stop?

You have taken everything from me!

You have me completely you will not share.

You just wouldn't stop until I had nobody there.

Its just me and you now

You got what you wanted.

You make me feel weak.

Useless and unwanted.

You took away my dreams.

Smashed my hopes.

To everyone else I am now just a joke.

Don't you see what you've done

or don't you even care?

I beg and plead yet your still there!!

You won its just me and you day after day

I'm sure it makes you proud to see what you've done.

The saddest thing is that I'm not the only one.

Just one last question what have I ever done?

I didnt pick you, you picked me

Now as nice as I can I am asking you to leave!!

I wanted to thank you sooooo much for your post. I really needed to hear something that day and you did a great job of calming me down.  I went to a very nice doctor today and hope that these new meds will work.  I just wanted to day thanks alot for your great response.

 

 

 I know what it's like and I know how hard it can be when others just don't understand. I have GAD, Social Anxiety and PTSD. Despite this, I have acted on stage,on film and I briefly  did stand-up. I had no problem doing these things despite my anxiety because everything was scripted and performing for an audience is much different than being "myself" in a group of people.  I would cry while driving because I was so afraid of crashing and I would immediately get drunk at social events in order to mingle. I've also had periods of agoraphobia that kept me trapped in my house for days and whenever a teacher/boss would watch me work or perform a task I'd have a panic attack. I've also survived periods of suicidal depression, which is what brought me to first seek help at 26.

Unfortunately for me, my ex-husband was not supportive, as he had the attitude that psychology was a farce and that my seeing a therapist would be embarrassing for him. He argued that anyone who could stand in front of a crowd and tell jokes must be well enough. I went anyways, and I changed therapists 3 times before I found one that really helped me.

I have been taking Zoloft and doing CBT for approx. 10 years now, and my only regret is not doing it sooner. When I think of how I used to feel before treatment I almost want to cry for myself. It is as if the person I was is somebody else and the person I am now is who I was meant to be. For me, it took 6 months to fully understand and cope with my disorder. I should point out that while I and many others need to be on medication basically for life, many others only need meds temporarily.

I just wanted to tell you a bit about my story so that you know that you are not alone. I've personally known at least 20 people who have a mental illness, from OCD to GAD to Schizophrenia to Bipolar Disorder,etc. Some I will always know because they are in my family. Of these people, the ones who sought and accepted treatment became better while the ones who never seek treatment or discontinue treatment against their therapist's advice stay the same or get worse.

The fact that you are seeking help means that you've taken the most difficult step already. All you have to do now is stick to it no matter what else is happening or happens in your life.  If you can't take care of you, you can't  take care of  anybody else. When Mommy or Wife cannot function, it affects Daughter and Husband. I say this because I suspect, like me, that you have a tendency to worry about others before yourself. This is called selflessness or altruism, and it is a beautiful trait to have (if I do say so myself).

However, sometimes you really need to put yourself in the #1 spot because it will benefit all concerned more in the long run. A Mommy and Wife needs to be healthy, mentally and physically, to be able to give the best care and be the best Mommy and Wife she can. Your therapy cannot be put on the back burner, and maybe Husband/friends/family can lend a hand if you need it.  Don't be afraid to be demanding about getting better and taking "you" time. It is necessary. 

Hugs!!! :)

You're welcome, anytime!  :) I hope the new meds work for you as well, and I'm happy you have found a good doctor. Happiness and hugs to you! :D

Oh goodness, I can't imagine having these issues and actually getting on stage and performing, so kudos to you!  Of course, you make absolutely perfect sense though saying how it is easier to perform and be someone else rather than be yourself in front of people.  Back in high school, I was highly involved in theatre, and yet...funny thing... when I took speech/debate I broke down into tears every time I had to stand up and speak in front of the class.  I don't really have issues like that anymore though--thank goodness.  Oh... forgive me for saying this, but your ex husband sounds like a close minded bugger.  I have ALWAYS had issues with people who were against others seeking help whether it be the poor getting help from the state (as long as they don't abuse the system) to other things.  I really am lucky to have a husband and most of my family (even if they are incredibly far away) by my side so to speak. 

Hearing your story--it helps.  It really is theraputic (spelling?) to discuss experiences with other people--every time I find someone who is experiencing something similar to me, it's like a weight off of my chest.  It makes me feel like I CAN beat this.  You've been so wonderful sharing and talking with me this way.  *glomp* 

It's funny--until all this started for me, I never really KNEW anyone who was suffering from any mental illness.But now... now they're crawling out of the woodwork.  I was incredibly saddened when I called my maternal grandmother and was speaking with her (I am very, very close with her) and she began to tell me how down she tends to get.  She's quite lonely, and in reality can relate to that aspect of my anxiety.  I wanted to give her a big hug and let her know I loved her!  I found out my brother in law's long time girlfriend suffers from anxiety/depression and severe OCD.  She's a counter, and is hopelessy wrapped in the rituals of showering many, many times a day.  I always thought she was just vain... (truth be told... boy am I ashamed of getting irritated with her when she lived with us last summer and showered 4-6 times a day for a good hour or more each time...)  And lastly, I talked with my paternal grandmother, (not as close with her due to issues with my dad...but we try) and she admitted she's been on antidepressants for the past 20 years or so... basically since her husband died. 

Even though none of these people (including you!) have issues identical to mine, it is amazing to know that I am not alone.  It's so strange to think when one suffers from such an illness, that they do really feel so terribly alone....when in truth, I think it is more common than people want to admit. 

Going after help was such a frightening thing for me.  I was convinced that when I saw my Dr...he was going to wrap me in straight jacket and lock me away.  Boy was I wrong!  Then when I had the terrible thoughts of hurting my daughter, I was scared to death the on call dr would call the police and they would arrive in the middle of the night and take my daughter away from me.  Again... I was wrong!  So the stereotypes and stigmas are even ingrained in me--but I won't lie, getting and seeking help was one of the best decisions I have made.  I am thoroughly looking forward to my therapist and doctor's visit next Tuesday. 

You're so right--and I've kind of noticed this over the last few weeks--my daughters been acting out a lot lately, and my husband and I both think it's because of all the issues I am having.  I have a hard time focusing and playing with her and I think she knows it.  Kids are so much keener than we give them credit for sometimes. 

I worked on some online CBT courses today--very curious, though I can't say doing it myself like that is working, but I also worked on some relaxation techniques.  Deep breathing and this technique of tensing groups of muscles one at a time and then relaxing them.  (I forget what it was called)  Then... hehe... there was the relaxation hypnosis.  I have to say, out of the three or four things I tried today, THIS was the most successful...why?  It felt so good to relax to the point of almost wanting to curl up and sleep.  XD  That is... until Arilynn (my girl) came in and wanted me to play Wii with her!! 

The last two days haven't been terribly bad, but I wanted to ask something and this is a bit off the wall, and I don't even know if you will understand what I am talking about-- but is it normal for anxiety and panic symptoms to get worse around the time you are expecting your period?  Without getting TOO personal-- this weekend was hellish for me and when I first began having the terrible panic and fear was about the time I was expecting my last period as well.   hehe.. I know... OFF the wall!!! 

It's not off the wall at all. The hormone changes a woman experiences during menstruation has a huge impact on her emotional state, and the cramping and bloating doesn't help either! I'm happy you're trying CBT techniques, and the meditation/guided relaxation helped me immeasurably as well. I actually cured a skin rash I had for 5 years (from wearing latex gloves when I worked as a Dental Assistant) soley through meditation. Before then I tried prescription creams, wearing vinyl gloves,wearing unpowdered gloves,etc. yet my chapped to the point of bleeding hands remained the same. After I got rid of the rash through meditation it never returned, despite wearing normal latex gloves.

The brain is a complicated organ, and having a "glitch" in how information is processed is not uncommon. I think of obsessive thoughts like a scratch on a record that makes it skip over one part repeatedly. Treatment is like lifting the needle and playing a different song. The record may always have a tendency to skip when it gets to the scratch, but knowing where it is going to skip ahead of time lets you prepare for it.

You obviously love your daughters very much, and while they may be aware that Mommy needs a little help right now, they are also aware of your love.  Part of the reason you're doing this is for them, and as long as they are secure in being loved, they will be fine.

I feel so happy for you getting treatment and even happier when I think about how much better you will feel as it continues. You sound like a really nice person and you deserve tranquil happiness. :)

Great big hug!!!! :D

I am suffering from aniety attacks and depression. It is ruining my life. I have not driven on the highway for probably two years now and it is getting to the point where I panic having to drive two blocks to the store.I am taking Effexor Xr and Ativan, yet I can still feel the anxiety.Is there anyone out there who has any advice on how to stop this horrible condition.Please I need some relief.

How long have you been on Effexor?  Usually antidepressants can cause anxiety.  If I were you I would talk to my doctor and see if there is any med that can counteract or take the place of Effexor.  I am on Klonopin and Hydroxyzine for my anxiety.  My doc won't even put me on an antidepressant because she knows that it will heighten the affects of my anxiety.  Just a suggestion.

 

IVY27