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January 6, 2008, 3:29 pm PST
Emetophobia
Quote From: ajhoney6I have been struggling the past year with emetophobia. It has been the worst year of my life. In the past year i graduated high school, all my friends moved away to colleges, broke up with my boyfriend of about three years, and tried starting college, on top of all of that i feel sick to my stomach every day because of my fear of throwing up. I have tried everything i can to feel better. I have been seeing a councelor, tried two different medications, cognitive behavior therapy, and nothing seems to cure me. Sure the medications help at times, but i cannot live the life i want to. I am constantly thinking and worrying about throwing up that i make myself feel naucious, i think anyone would feel that way if they were constantly focusing on it, but i cant make myself stop. I will leave class, work, i wont go out with my friends, and when i sit at home i will just count the hours untill i can go to sleep and put myself out of my missory. I can't concentrate on anything else, like school work. I failed 3 of my classes first semester, and passed one with a C because i had that class everyday and was able to make it enough to pass. I just don't know what to do anymore. I haven't actually thrown up since i was in 1st grade. I don't know what its like except for that i hated it, its extreamly unpleasent, and it has turned into a full blown fear for me. I have lost about 15 pounds all together because when i feel sick, which is just about all the time, i wont eat. I am losing hope and am just looking for someone to talk to who could relate, give me advice, or anything. I feel so alone and don't know anyone else who has had something like this. It makes me feel like i am weird and different. I used to be so happy, loved life so much, and i want my life back so bad. So this is just my cry for help! Thanks for taking the time for reading about my life and if anyone could help or relate it would be very much appreciated! Thanks, Ali
Hi Ali,
I have suffered from Emetophobia pretty much all my life, you're not alone. I actually went through years without even thinking about getting sick, but I developed an ulcer and it is not uncommon for me to eat certain foods without feeling sick to my stomach. I don't vomit, but I can get very queezy. For ex. new years eve I over drank with my friends, then I had super spicy mex food. The next day I was feeling so sick I thought I was sure to vomit. However, because I supressed it, I ended up wasting 4 days of my vacation in bed feeling sick. I think I should have just thrown up, because I probably would have felt much better afterwards, and I wouldn't have wasted four days. My phobia hasn't shown itself in years. My condition sort of kick started my fear again. However, when I'm feeling well, I don't even think about it unless someone is sick around me. One thing that helped me cope a little better was reminding myself that throwing up is one of the most natural thing the body does, just as natural as sneezing. I haven't gotten sick in years, but for some reason I think what leads up to vomiting is the real culprit in this disorder, it's not really the act itself. I wish I could have been brave this last time when I felt like getting sick, just to see if what leads up to it is worse than actually vomitting. The only advice I can give you is to try to change your thoughts about how you view vomitting. Changing my view helped me not think of it for years, It helped me to put it in perspective. The mind is extremely strong and I honestly believe that we can train our minds not to focus on what could happen. Lets face it, a gazillon things can happen to us in public, our chances of getting into a car accident are far greater than getting sick. Try to focus on the here and now. The mind can get paralyzed by these phobias if we allow them to. For years I took control of my thoughts, and did not bother my life with this phobia, it wasn't until I developed an ulcer that I started thinking about it again, but I'm determined to gain full control of my thoughts, and not live my life by my fears. Whenever I have a passing thought I automatically replace it with something pleasant. As much as I can surpress vomitting, I believe I can supress my thoughts of it. I hope you feel better, and hope that sharing my story helps you. Good luck.
Chanel
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