Topic : How Childhood Abuse Still Affects Me

Has your daughter been dx with post traumatic stress disorder? I do not know Canada laws but here we have the IDEA act where special services can be provided through the school system. My daughter can go to her counselor if having a panic attack, she can use the bathroom without having to ask. She is able to get a seat int he back of the classroom, for some reason people sitting behind her is a problem for her. The paranoid thinking and whatnot. you should look into what special education services you have in your area. If you haven't already done so. It did help my daughter get back into school this last school year. They only put her in half days but that is better than none.

I have to go my shows are about to come on :))

Tam

My sister bought my parents house.  When we were little kids my father lined us all up and it was near sunset.  He said "watch" as a pall mall cigarette was out his mouth.  I was the youngest of the four kids. He threw in our family pet cat and closed it in with cement....I saw this...I was 5 or 6 I saw this...

 

Let me bring you to today...

 

My sister is away up in Maine.  She is getting a "new" deck added on. So the old deck was taken off and nobody is there.  In the backyard where my father closed it in a lone set of steps go to the back door.  Just the decks outline is there.  Today July 31, 05 with my sister and her husband's permission even though she said "Why Dad's dead anyway"  I went and I prayed and I started knocking down the part that he sealed up.  There was alot of junk in there.  Bricks, and to me it looked like actually bone with cement on it and so I called my husband who was across town and he came and looked and he said "What is this what you called me for? Look at this this is old brick this is old cement...."

I told him he just doesn't get me or my pain or the why I needed to do that...

 

I don't know about any of you but have you ever been in a relationship where you had to on a daily basis keep bringing your brain energy down keep bringing it down?

 

I dont know if you know what I mean......But anyway...Have a good rest of your weekend....xoxo

Were you a child that was abused?  If it's too personal Im sorry.... Im just wondering....

HI LABELFREE,I WAS ABUSED SOME .MY DAD DIED WHEN I WAS 5 AND MY MOM WAS PREGNANT AT THE TIME WITH MY BROTHER AND HE DIED A COUPLE OF MONTHS LATER .WE HAD A ROUGH GO OF IT FOR A LOT OF YEARS.MY MOM TURNED TO DRINKING AND HAD THE WORST TASTE IN MEN THAT ANYONE CAN HAVE.THESE MEN OF COURSE JUST USED HER AND TOSSED HER ASIDE AND SHE DRANK MORE.BUT MOSTLY AT NIGHT .DEFINITELY NOT AN EXCUSE FOR HER THATS FOR SURE.SHE MET UP WITH SOME ONE THAT WAS THE BIGGEST LOSER OF ALL .MY MOM WOULD GO TO WORK AND HE WOULD GET DRUNK ,ME BEING THE OLDER OF US GIRLS (I HAVE 2SISTERS &1 BROTHER ,BROTHER IS 5 YEARS OLDER THAN ME  1 BROTHER DEATH LIKE I MENTIONED AND 1 SIS TOO DIED AT THE AGE OF 2)ANYHOW LIKE I SAID ME BEING THE OLDER OF THE REST I HAD THE CLEANING AND COOKING TO TEND TOO .IWAS NINE I BELIEVE AT THE TIME.MY OLDER BROTHER HAD LEFT HOME TO GO TO WORK ,NOT MUCH OLDER HIMSELF 14 YRS OLD.WELL ANYHOW THIS CREEP OF A BOYFRIEND OF MY MOM'S WAS A DRUNKEN BUM .HE WOULD TRY TO TOUCH ME BUT I WOULD ALWAYS SLAP HIM PUNCH HIM OR ANYTHING TO DRAW ATTN TO HIM .

 

MY MOM WAS TOLD WHAT WAS GOING ON AND SHE DID BELIEVE ME TOO AND OUT HE WENT.BUT SHE WAS ALWAYS DRAWN TO THESE LOSERS .THEY WOULD GET DRUNK COME HOME BEAT MY MOM AND KICK US OUT OF THE HOUSE THAT WE ALWAYS SEEM TO BE SUCKERED IN TO MOVING IN WITH THEM (BOYFRIENDS)ANYHOW SO SHE WENT ON LIKE THIS FOR AWHILE TILL WE MET THE CREEPS OF ALL CREEPS.HE WAS SO GOOD WHEN HE WANTES SOMETHING AND I MEAN STEALING, FORGING BAD CHECKS AND WHAT NOT.HE WOULD COME HOME DRUNK TOO LIKE THE REST KICK US OUT WE MOST OF THE TIME DIDN'T HAVE A PLACE TO GO TO.SO THAT WENT ON TOO ALOT WANDERING AROUND TRYING TO FIND A PLACE TO SLEEP BECAUSE OF THIS ASSHOLE HOME SMASHING THE FURNITURE AND WHAT NOT.HE USED TO TRY TO GET ME TO TOUCH HIM AND AGAIN I MADE MORE NOISE AND I REALLY HATED HIM .I WOULD FIGHT WITH HIM SLAP HIM PUNCH ,KICK DO WHATEVER I COULD DO.MY MOM FOR SOME REASON BELIEVED HIM THIS TIME ,HE KEPT SAYING HE WAS TRYING TO DISAPLINE ME SO SHE BELIEVED BECAUSE IF SHE DIDN'T HE WOULD JUST LEAVE AND GET DRUNK AND AGAIN WE WOULD BE GONE.ANYHOW THAT WENT ON FOR ABOUT TEN YEARS I THINK ,WITH THE PARTIES I SAW MORE FIGHTS IN OUR HOME FROM THESE PARTIES AND IT WAS NOT THE SOCIAL PARTY OF THE YEAR.I SAW MORE BLOOD ON THE WALLS AND FIGHT THERE WAY TO OUR ROOM WHERE US KIDS WOULD BE HUDDLED IN A CORNER TOO SEE ALL THAT BLOOD WAS TERRIFYING.

 

 THE MEN WERE OF COURSE THE ONES THAT FOUGHT.MY MOM WAS SO TAKING IN BY THIS CREEP THAT SHE JUST DRANK TO STOP THE HURT BUT THANK GOD SHE DIDN'T WHEN HE DID.THE LAST DRAW WAS WHEN ONE YEAR AT CHRISTMAS HE CAME HOME WITH GIFTS FOR US ALL TO FIND OUT THAT HE WAS NOT WORKING LIKE HE SAID ,HE STOLE ALL THE GIFTS OR WROTE BAD CHECKS TOO .SO ON CHRISTMAS EVE WHILE WE OPENED THE GIFTS A KNOCK ON THE DOOR ,THE POLICE ARRESTED HIM FOR STOLEN PROPERTY AND TOOK EVERYTHING.BOY THAT WAS A ROUGH CHRISTMAS.ANYHOW TO SHORTEN MY STORY MY MOM LEFT HIM .HOORAY!!!!! WE MOVED BACK HERE WHERE I AM FROM &WAS BORN .SHE HAS SINCE MET A WONDERFUL MAN AND IS MARRIED  KNOW SHE HASN'T TOUCHED LIQUOR FOT ABOUT 15 YRS NOW AND I DON'T THINK SHE MISSES IT EITHER.I MYSELF HAVE A WONDERFUL HUSBAND AND TWO BEAUTIFUL GIRLS 15 SHE IS THE ONE I WRITE ABOUT ,I THINK I TALKED ABOUT HER STORY OVER ON THE DEPRESSION BOARD AND I HAVE A BEAUTIFUL 23 YR OLD AS WELL .SO YES I DO KNOW ABUSE AS WELL BOTH EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL .I DON'T MIND SHARING MY STORY NOW .I HOPE SOMEONE CAN READ THIS AND THINK GOSH MAYBE MY LIFE ISN'T SO BAD OR MAYBE THEY CAN GET HELP OF SOME KIND.TAKE CARE LABELFREE AND GOD BLESS .COME BACK OVER IF YOU READ THIS TO THE OTHER BOARD AGAIN.LOTS OF LUV .CATHY

I wish you all and me peace and healing. May our days bring peaceful healing, our nights bring sweet dreams and each morning bring an abundance of blessings of the best kind henceforth and forevermore. Amen and Amen