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Topic : Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

Number of Replies: 228
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Created on : Thursday, July 07, 2005, 09:00:55 am
Author : dataimport
Patients suffering from OCD have a challenge in overcoming their illness. Share your story and get support from those who understand.

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December 27, 2005, 11:55 pm CST

Avoidance is OCD Related

Quote From: rhondapat

I guess I don't understand what the problem is.  I have been unable to work for 4 years now due to various handicaps.  To keep myself from going "stir crazy" I do a lot of things around the house...how does that make a person "OCD". 

When people hear the word Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, they think about hand washing, checking, the show MONK, etc. But these rituals or examples do not describe OCD. OCD is the occurence of obsessions followed by anxiety and then followed by rituals or behaviors in order to reduce the anxiety. People with OCD want to avoid anxiety at all costs and therefore perform rituals to alleviate the anxiety but still avoid what they fear, increasing the anxiety next time. The never ending search for a perfect non-anxiety related life experience goes on to create an even worse anxiety related experience through avoidance of living. 

  

With a person constantly re-arranging her furniture and not willing to go outside. The ritual she is performing is the re-arranging of furniture in order to avoid (avoidance is OCD related) dealing with her life or facing her fears. The problem with a lot of individuals who have OCD is the insight into when it is occuring. The rule I useis  when I am: avoiding anything,  doubting, have uncertainty, or am looking for the perfect answer which is also associeted with anxiety followed by a need for me to ruminate about it in my head unitil I have the perfect answer or am waiting for when it feels right, this is OCD. 

  

All the best, 

  

James 

 
December 28, 2005, 12:17 am CST

Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder

Quote From: bhall1975

My boyfriend (who is the father of my 2 year old) is OCD.  He does not have "normal" OCD.  Ya know where you wash your hands every 5 mins.  His is: everything has to be his way.  Like the way you ask and answer questions.  If it's not the way he would do it, it's not right, it's stupid and causes a 15 min arguement.  He tells me to do something one way and when I do over and over again, one day that way is wrong and he starts arguing with me.  I know that this is a disorder and he can't help it, but he won't get on medication because he says that I am the cause of everything.  And 3 years of it is making me feel pretty bad about myself and question everything and everybody in my past.  Is there anyone who can give advice on how to live with him and maybe get him to get back on meds??????

Your boyfriend sounds like he has Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder, and not OCD. They are the same in some ways but are different in one major area. People with Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder think there way to do things is the right way and don't understand why everyone else can not do the same (righteous indignation:, I am always right, you are wrong). They also don't see anything wrong with the way they think or see the world. 

  

People with OCD on the other hand hate the rituals they perform and get angry because their anxiety propels them to perform the rituals. They do not think others should  perform the rituals they perform because they know them to be useless. 

  

That said, therapy (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) or couples therapy would be the best option possibly associated with medication but I would say therapy is a must. If he refuses to go, remind him that two people are in a relationship and one (yourself) isn't  happy with the way things are. It's not his or your fault things have developed to where they are now but you would like to be happy with him and you think a 3rd person who is outside your relationship can help you two better understand each other and learn to communicate better. 

  

For a better undertanding of Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder is suggest: http://www.ocdonline.com/articlephillipson6.php 

  

Good Luck, 

  

James 

 
December 28, 2005, 1:29 am CST

How To Handle OCD

Quote From: alyssa_

Im 15, and since i was little i wouyld always have to have my socks perfect, i would take 15 minutes because they would drive me crazy! also if i would touch my hand on somthing then i would have to do it exactly the same to the other one. Or my arms or anything. But i dont do tht anymore. Now everytime i watch tv or loistn to music the volume number HAS to be even. If it isnt  cant watch it. In class we watch movies and i will go up to the tv to put it on a even number. Also this ones a litte wierd and hard to explain but ill try... ok ill give an example, the tv i will read something or somene says something and ill say the words in my head to each corner of the tv untill it ends up on the last side, or ill do it wth the sideawlk or anything. I dont knoe how to stop, and it drivess me crazxy! how can i stop i try but its so hard tht it just bugs me... doesa anyone else have any of the feelings i do?

When it comes to OCD and how to manage it, in my experience there are three different steps: 

  

First, recognizing (insight or awareness) that what you are doing or thinking is OCD related. If you are: avoiding something, performing an action (ritual), searching for perfection, having unwanted thoughts come into your head and you are trying to push them away (ruminate), afraid of uncertainty, have to check things because you are having doubts, have to clean things, order things, say certain words, have fears of being a bad person and these situations are associated with anxiety, then these thoughts are OCD related. 

  

Second, is to seperate yourself from the OCD. Think of your OCD thinking as a seperate entity living in your brain that is not part of you normal fuctioning brain. Think of your OCD as an unwanted friend who is trying to seduce you into trouble who does not have your best interests at heart. In fact, OCD wants you to suffer. For it to exist, you must be anxious and continue to perform those rituals. 

  

Third, when faced with the anxiety associated with OCD (also sometimes called a spike), first label it as such, "It's OCD not my healthy brain". Second, do not perform the rituals or ruminate about the OCD thought. You will feel anxious, infact you will feel very anxious for a short period, but it will subside within twenty minutes to an hour, on average. It's important not to fight or stop the OCD thoughts, just realize OCD is there as a seperate part of your brain and ignore it. Trying to challenge OCD or logically challenge it will not make it go away, it will probably only get worse.  

  

They key is to let the OCD thoughts exist, and go about your normal activities. Remembering that OCD is a seperate part of you brain and not your normal fuctioning part of your brain. This is not easy but it does work. 

  

I would also suggest seeing a cognitive behavioral therapist who has experience with dealing with OCD. I also suggest the following web sites: 

  

OCD ON LINE: http://www.ocdonline.com/defineocd.php 

OCFOUNDATION: http://www.viryours.com/showcase/ocd/index.html 

OCD SUPPORT GROUPS (North America): http://www.viryours.com/showcase/ocd/ocf1170d.htm 

  

Good Luck, 

  

James 

  

  

  

 
December 28, 2005, 1:47 am CST

Cognitive Behavioural Therapist

Quote From: aharris28

My girlfriend of a year has OCD and it has become increasingly more evident.  She was hurt at work in May and has not been the same since, there where several issues around being hurt.  First her employer protested that she was hurt and the workers comp here in washington took until November to accept her claim so that she could recieve treatment.  She has become a hermit and rarely leaves the house, so therefore agoriphobia has set in.  Since she rarely leaves the house her OCD has taken over.  Her OCD comes in the form of rearranging the house and cleaning.  If I start a project and leave something out to finish later she automaticly will come behind me and put everything away.  The kitchen is one of her worst issues there can't be a dish in the sink when she walks in, she will automaticly stop whatever she was doing and put them in the dishwasher.  I have been working 2 or 3 jobs to make ends meet, and when I am gone all day long I always have to wonder what will be changed, our living room has been rearranged probably 20 times in the last 8 months, our bedroom has been rearranged at least 30 times.  Meds for her are not the answer, she has taken several different ones over the years and is uninterested in going through the rigors of trying several different meds.  What can I do to help her??????

Your girlfriend needs the help of a qualified cognitive behavioural therapist who specializes in OCD. These therapists usually have experience with anxiety disorders as well since OCD is an anxiety disorder. I would try either looking for a counsellor through the phone book, the web, or through universities. I would also try the following web sites: 

  

Support Groups (North America): http://www.viryours.com/showcase/ocd/ocf1170d.htm 

OCFOUNDATION.ORG : http://www.viryours.com/showcase/ocd/index.html 

  

All the Best 

  

James 

  

  

Below is another response I wrote to someone else:  

  

  

When people hear the word Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, they think about hand washing, checking, the show MONK, etc. But these rituals or examples do not describe OCD. OCD is the occurence of obsessions followed by anxiety and then followed by rituals or behaviors in order to reduce the anxiety. People with OCD want to avoid anxiety at all costs and therefore perform rituals to alleviate the anxiety but still avoid what they fear, increasing the anxiety next time. The never ending search for a perfect non-anxiety related life experience goes on to create an even worse anxiety related experience through avoidance of living.  

   

With a person constantly re-arranging her furniture and not willing to go outside. The ritual she is performing is the re-arranging of furniture in order to avoid (avoidance is OCD related) dealing with her life or facing her fears. The problem with a lot of individuals who have OCD is the insight into when it is occuring. The rule I useis  when I am: avoiding anything,  doubting, have uncertainty, or am looking for the perfect answer which is also associeted with anxiety followed by a need for me to ruminate about it in my head unitil I have the perfect answer or am waiting for when it feels right, this is OCD.  

 
December 28, 2005, 7:38 pm CST

My View of OCD

My OCD started about 14 years ago, when was 24 years old and in university. I didn't know it was OCD at the time. I was just searching for myself, trying to find out who I was, what I was meant to do with my life etc. After three years of reading and re-reading 30 or so books many times over concering the subjects of choosing a career and figuring out ones purpose in life, did I begin to think oddly.  

  

I am not regilous, but given the time frame, the new age movement, and that some of the books I read had a new age slant to them, I would question whether I was choosen for some higher purpose and believed that I would get signs from god about what that purpose was. When I saw a priest, nun, church, or a street with a religous name, I believed that god was telling me to become a priest and give my life to god. The problem was, as I know now, that I didn't want to do that. While I liked helping people I didn't want to become a priest or work in religion as I am have always been an agnostic (a fence sitter as I call it). However, at the time I was obsessing about this issue, I was a mess. I would avoid churches, crosses, religous people in dress, streets with religous names or with St. or Saint in front of them because I would obsess that I was getting a message from god. Sounds easy but I live in a french city and churchs and religous street names are everywhere. 

  

My obsession about finding the right job continued as I read and re-read many times the same books on the subject constantly hoping the next time I read the book, I would get the perfect answer (OCD).  

  

Other obsessions that drove me to seek help were my obsessions with hurting people. When I was with a pretty woman I would have thoughts about hurting her, stabbing her. When I held a knife, a pencil, or anything sharp I had thoughts and urges to stab people with the object. Given these unsettling thoughts of violence I wondered whether I was an evil person, so then I had obsessions with the number 6 as in 666, you know the number of the beast etc. I would add, divide, multiply, etc all numbers I saw anywhere (TV sports jerseys, civic address numbers, invoice numbers, licence plate numbers) if the number could be calculated to be a 6 (12/2=6 2x3=6 24 2+4+6, etc) I believed I was given a sign that I was an evil person. 

  

After seeing five therapists, I found one who knew what I had and withthe help of cognitive behavioral therapy, and lots of work, I was able to apply the techniques to rid myself of the bad obsessions. Now I am dealing with the neutral obsessions that are pervasive but I am working on them to get my life back. I have been avoiding working on them for many years because change is scary and takes work. 

  

What I have noticed after talking to people with OCD and reading on the subject a bit is I think the way to handle OCD is two-fold. 

  

First: You have to deal with the OCD through therapy and applying the theraputic techniques, in order to get the OCD symptoms under control & manageable. 

  

Second : I think the core issue is what needs to be worked on: Low self-esteem, low-self worth, need to be perfect, not feeling lovable until..., & not feeling good enough. I believe the condition of OCD is our brains way telling us we are thinking about ourselves unhealthly, like someone with an eating disorder, we manifest these unhealthy thinking patterns via the disorder OCD. " I am not good enough, I am not as good as or I am not as successful as my friends at....(comparing), I am inadequate". These thoughts, in my opinion are the basis for our obsessive condition. 

  

Any Thoughts?  

  

   

 
December 30, 2005, 9:44 pm CST

Finally Finding Your True Love.... And Not Even Knowing There Name

Hi all. This is my first post. I am just posting about my issue. Brace yourself this all may sound a little wierd and corny but it is very serios to me and the most important issue in my life right now. Ok. My issue is a love at first sight issue. I saw this girl in this movie, "Napoleon Dynamite"...sounds lame already... keep reading. I fell in love with her just at the sigh of her. Out of no where. Random movie, random time, random everything. Dont get me wrong, I'm not saying I love a movie star or a major actress. She had about two 5 second parts, both none speaking roles. Also most my friends think I am crazy for feeling this way for her for so long now. "1 plus year" They say that she isnt even that good looking to them. But I tell them "I am not in love with her becuase the way that she looks, its just somthing about her that makes her so perfect" The movie was filmed intirly in Preston Idaho. I know she lives in Preston becuase all the student extras are real students. I live in Oregon. So.. that is one state away. So i should just be able to ride a bus right. Nope. I have litterly no many and havent been able to find a job for almost a year. I have almost packed up and started walking many times now. My friends ans family say for me not to go becuase they affraid i get killed or get picked up buy some crazyperson. And then they give me the "well what happens if you get there and she thinks your insane, or she hate you, or you cant find her" Well, even if it didnt work out it would be worth all the effort to just see her in person even for a moment. This has been a mental burden for so long. I wish i could find a way to find out who she is or how to get in contact with her. Ive tried looking in the credits but their names are under school kids, and guess what, this movie has the longest extras cast out of any movie ever made from what I hear. So I took all the girls names who had the same last name as another girl. You may ask why I did this. Becuase she had a sister, and i know this becuase they look similar. So I am stuck with a list of names, no money, no support, and the constant frightfull thought that bye the time I get there it will be to late. So if anyone has any ideas just send them to me. Or make a post. Thank you all and thanks Dr. Phil
 
December 31, 2005, 6:01 pm CST

ty

Quote From: unclemtl

Your boyfriend sounds like he has Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder, and not OCD. They are the same in some ways but are different in one major area. People with Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder think there way to do things is the right way and don't understand why everyone else can not do the same (righteous indignation:, I am always right, you are wrong). They also don't see anything wrong with the way they think or see the world. 

  

People with OCD on the other hand hate the rituals they perform and get angry because their anxiety propels them to perform the rituals. They do not think others should  perform the rituals they perform because they know them to be useless. 

  

That said, therapy (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) or couples therapy would be the best option possibly associated with medication but I would say therapy is a must. If he refuses to go, remind him that two people are in a relationship and one (yourself) isn't  happy with the way things are. It's not his or your fault things have developed to where they are now but you would like to be happy with him and you think a 3rd person who is outside your relationship can help you two better understand each other and learn to communicate better. 

  

For a better undertanding of Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder is suggest: http://www.ocdonline.com/articlephillipson6.php 

  

Good Luck, 

  

James 

Thank you james.
 
December 31, 2005, 6:05 pm CST

stand by your man

Quote From: bjd713

hi. I really have only read alot about OCD. I am sorry that you are put through so much with your husband. I mean like all the blaming he does. Please go to counseling and stick by your husband.   

  

I have depression and anxiety and I would have appreciated my spouse sticking by me and helping out. i miss my spouse so much. we are seperated now and probably going for a divorce.  

  

anyway good luck 

Yes.  I will not go anywhere.  I love him deeply.  We have so much in common.  Thank you.  And I hope that you get yourself better. 
 
January 4, 2006, 4:42 am CST

OCD and Tourette type behaviour

Quote From: bonnieflec

I've been taking my 12 yr. old daughter to therapy every week for over a year doing cbt 

therapy. Her therapist thinks my daughter needs meds and it has been one step forward three 

steps back. The house is getting more contaminated and the less places she can walk thru, touch 

and be free to just be. My heart aches for her and it is also hard for the family to cope. I believe 

in meds but am nervous. My now 24 yr. old was treated for depression when she was 14 and after 

taking prozac became manic and was diagnosed w/ bipolar. I have been looking for a psychiatrist 

and it seems like all the good ones don't take insurance and I'm worried that my husband will flip 

out if I pay a doctor not on our plan. The therapist I take her to isn't on our plan, but I really like 

her and I am seeing her as well w/ other of my issues past & present. Does anyone have any 

good feedback about ocd and meds for children? 

Thank you and God Bless 

  

Hello, I am 40 years old and am just discovering why I behave the way I do.  

Your comments re. your daughter's behaviour suggest that you may wish to resarch Tourette syndrome which sometimes overlaps with OCD. Don't Panic! Great people such as Samuel Johnson and the soccer player Tim Howard had/have this condition, as do many other successful and happy people. Therapists sometimes fail to recognise this connection, even experienced ones.  

The screaming fits that you describe in a later response to this quote made me think of this. 

Some people seem to feel that eliminating symptoms or behaviour is the answer, through therapy or medication. Personally I think that those around your daughter have to be educated as to her anxieties, although her own rituals should not be allowed to restrict her (or your) life. Stick to reducing the really intense rituals and tolerate the rest. General tolerance and education about these conditions would make life more bearable for us and lower our anxiety levels. I share your doubts about medication. 

It occurred to me that all the attention that this condition must be focusing on your daughter might be raising anxieties in your family generally and her failure to improve may be a reaction to that. 

I hope things ease up soon for the sake of everyone in your household. 

  

  

 
January 5, 2006, 7:03 pm CST

husband with ocd

My husband  has ocd, anxiety, and depression.  It's hard on us because I don't have it. But  we work together.   The thing is we are having trouble with a neighbor that is not helping his sitution at all. This neighbor stole from us, we filed charges, now this 45 year old man is harassing our family and no one is doing anything about it.  He has called child protective services, adult protective Services, health department,  the sheriff, on us. Plus many more the list just goes on.  He has cameras facing my house we watches every move we make. He gongs on a barrel everytime we go outside. He tried to run over my husband, his brother tried to run over me and my kids. He put mirrors on his fence facing my house the grass under the mirror caught on fire, the fireman said the fire was not from the mirrors.  I always call the fire marshall before I burn, we are under a burn ban now I knew this the fire marshall came all the way to my house to tell me not to burn.  My husband as I said has anxiety/depression  but this man is driving my whole family in sane. And I'm at wits end. I can't afford to move. I found this web site and I'm hoping to release some of this and get some comments from you good people. Thank you for reading my message. God Bless you. 

Jakkay 

 
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