Topic : 07/10 Slacker Wives and Moocher Moms

I can kinda relate to the quote above.  I was not brought up as a slacker or lazy however since being married to a husband who misses the dirty clothes hamper everytime and 2 kids following behind daddy, I find myself overwelmed cleaning up after EVERYBODY including the dog and cat.  I love for things to be clean but find it hard to keep it that way when I am the onlyone cleaning.  I sound like a broken record pick up your clothes, make your bed, put your dishes in the sink  blah blah blah. After coming home from work after being out of the house for 12 hours a day all I want to do is feed the kids and put the kids to bed so I can relax.  My husband works second shift so during the day instead of cleaning he's watching T.V. or "resting" until he goes to work.  I myself feel like all I do in my free time ( whenever that is) is sit down and unwind.  I was a stay at home mom for about a year 3 years ago and I loved it I didn't stay in the bed for 18 hours a day but I enjoy doing things at my own pace.

I wonder if Judge Judy should have a go at her?  LOL.  She'll chew her up and make her pay her kids and grandson back.  So, excuse me Dr. Phil while I picture you and the Judge having a field day with Rita.

Pearlhanna

Keya,

It sounds like you've given up on yourself because your husband cheated on you, or you're trying to make him pay for his adultery, however, you're really hurting yourself and your children.  Your children are going to pattern their lives after you, especially if you have girls.  I know it sounds easy to say forgive him, however, it must be said "FORGIVE HIM" and Move Forward.  Misery loves company and yes, his life might be miserable because of your slacking, however, just think how much happier your children would be if they saw the two of you working together to make life happy for yourselves and them.  There is life after adultery and you have to get yours back.  Don't give it to the other women they're not with him, you are.  Bad things happen to all people everywhere and at some point you have to decide whether or not it's going to stop you or make you a better person.  The choice is yours regardless of what Dr. Phil says or anybody else, Take your life back and move forward.

I get it that everyone hates slackers and takers, and I think most people have been victimized by them.  I think Rita has much deeper problems than needing to go to work.  Stealing money is deplorable, but she has no money of her own.  She has no money because she does not work, but she knows she can get jobs; KEEPING THE JOB IS THE PROBLEM. 

I have the same problem with jobs (not stealing), and I am going through my savings and credit cards like crazy because I cannot face another job.  I was fired from the last job 10 months ago, and I can't face going to work anymore.  I have PTSD, and get so upset at work that people would rather I leave, and I agree with them! 

My jobs are lucrative, and I want to work.  I have been fired many, many times, and it is humiliating.  I get a job, go to work for three months or a year, get fired, go into another depression, live off credit cards, get another job, pay huge credit card bills, get stressed, get fired, and it goes on and on, for years.

I have read every self help book I can find, had years of therapy, take medication, turned myself inside out trying to get along, make friends, be nice, work harder than anyone else, ALL for the sole goal of keeping my job.  Overtime, no problem; weekends and holidays, no problem, love to work weekends and off during the week. Extra work, I will do it.  Keep a job, can't do it.

It's not always as simple as calling someone lazy.  Dr. Phil should look at this one a little more.

Hey,

I agree about there not being  a good excuse for someone being a lazy taker. I totally agree. It sounds like you must do EVERYTHING around your house. Are you comfortable with that? That is how things seem to be around our house, but I am honestly not happy about it being that way anymore. So, I am motivated to figure out a way to make some changes so that I am not doing EVERYTHING and my husband steps up and does his share. We are about to adopt another child, so my load will get bigger, so I really need him to step up. Any advice?

Thanks,

Lisa

      Just been watching your program on our tv today & i thought thats the same problem that we have. Our daughter is 41 & her & her youngest boy { 6 } is still liveing with us, & we are both in our 70t's. We brought up her oldest boy who is now 22 & partly her middle boy who is 10 but is liveing with his father in England. She is very unhappy & we have said if you are so unhappy why don't you leave, then she say's she will but dosént. Should we give her an ultimatum.

                   Ted & Ena.