Topic : Living with Chronic Pain

all right.  come out, please.  i am embarassed by all my babbling on here.  and sammy's face predominent --

 

i a, especially concerned about my cuz and the methadone situation (i think we need to be careful not to throw that around as "meth"!)!  and brenda... and dear tanya... and morgan -- please post, just check in... and pickles -- this must be a terrible time, not something you exactly need right now, how is she doing, the niece also, and you above all.

 

dianah -- thanks for the advice on the wristdrop and worthless hand.  it has me feeling pretty blue.  sometimes the splint helps but still, i am now SuperKlutz:  last night i wanted to cook up some chai -- very relaxing for me and the hankster late at night.  these are just some of the flub-ups:  couldn't get spice bottles down without knocking over their brethren... dropped the bottle containing my precious vanilla beans, glass everywhere... dropped the milk, a major spill... when ladling out the finished product (it *was* good!), burned (scalded milk, etc.) the four fingers on my left hand.  they're fine now but turned completely blue last night -- (tanya will understand -- a "normal" person would go red...!).

 

but it was worth doing!  two doctors have said the palsy may go away on its own but neither could look me in the face... web info says that also -- and gives a window of 6 wks to 3 months.  i wish i could cross my fingers -- ararar!  love to you -- and everyone, prof

Lol yeah. She had to sign her confidentiality rights away or whatever because there was such a huge fuss...even though she actually never did say that. lol. I saw that article a while back.

Thank you all, my friends, for your honesty. I really appreciate it.

Well, we had several long talks this weekend. And I finally convinced Keeper that 14 years together (nearly 10 of them married) is too long to just throw away. So he has agreed to stay and for us to work on our marriage.

So, he's still here, and I have some hope. This morning, since our last talk lasted until nearly midnight so he ended up getting less than 4 hours of sleep, he called off work. And instead of my going back to the recliner in the front room, I grabbed my sleeping bag and took it to the bedroom, pushed it into something resembling a pillow for my head, and curled up with him. We slept pretzle-fied until 10:00 AM and it felt so good. I hadn't realized how much I missed that, needed that. I can see where he was missing it, too. Tonight I'm going to sleep in the bed.

Not to totally blame myself, but until we talked I didn't realize how complacent I'd become, and neglectful as a result - of myself, the house, and him. So we both have a lot of work ahead of us, especially me.

Brenda, I'm still keeping my appointment at the Independent Living Center. Perhaps they can help us find a place to live, maybe help with the housework, and definitely get me back into Voc. Rehab. (I didn't know until I talked to the people at the Living Center that a Voc. Rehab case can be reopened at any time.) I'm taking the lessons learned from the past few weeks and continuing forward, moving to where I can be independent. That's an important thing here.

Anyhow, pain meds are kicking in so I'll stop this before I stop making sense. At least today I have a little bit of hope in my heart.

Hugs & Blessings,

Morgan

Morgan

 

I truly hope things work out the way you hope - you deserve to be happy.  Happiness is a CHOICE and its one that is made everyday and it has to come from within.  I have all

the faith in the world in you.  Listen to the ILC and VR people - they know their stuff.

You might ask them about a Habitat For Humanity House.  You and Keep will have

to contribute "Sweat Equity" whether it is actual manual labor or making cofee for the

workers.  It would give you a real HOME - that is up to code !

I am sending you a big hug.  Remember to take time for yourself to stay grounded

centered and focused.

 

Lots of Hugs

Brenda

I have a nasty head cold - arrgghhh (achoo !)  Even one of the cats is sneezing.

Expecting company this coming wknd (my son & daughter-in-law) so I am trying

to do major cleaning.  I never use the guest rooms so they ar eeasy to maintain.

But we all know the battle of the fur and dander. 

I would fix a hot toddy (lemon juice, honey, water & bourbon) but I don't like to mis

alcohol with my meds.  Once a nurse always a nurse I guess.  So I will continue

to cough and sneeze and keep my Lysol/Clorox Wipes handy. 

 

Brenda

Get well soon Brenda!!!! and the sneezing kitty too!

 

You don't want to be sick when the company comes. That's never fun!

 

Becca

XOXO

 HI KAREN, BOY WHEN I READ YOUR STORY I THOUGHT I WAS READING MY OWN .I'M 40 YRS OLD AND TOO SUFFER FROM THE PAIN.I JUST GOT MY DICISION FROM SOCIAL SECURITY.THIS IS THE MEDICAL EVIDENCE OK I'M GOING TO START WITH THAT THEN I'LL TELL YOU YES OR NO.THE MEDICAL EVIDENCE FINDINGS THAT THE CLAIMANT ( ME) HAS SEVERE...IMPAIRMENTS DUE TO MULTI-LEVEL DEGENERTIVE CERVICAL DISC DISEASE, STATUS C-5 -C6 DISKECTOMY AND FUSION 2002, C-4 THROUGH C-6 DISKECTOMY AND FUSION 2004, AND THE RESIDUALS OF MORE RECENT C-3 TO T-1 FUSION (2 RODS,6PLATES,12SCREWS) DEGENERATIVE LUMBAR DISC DISEASE AND SMALL DISC PROTRUSION AT L-5-S-1 SIGNIFICANTLEY AFFECTS HER ABILITY TO DO HEAVY LIFTING, CARRYING, CRAWLING, STOOPING, BENDING, AND REACHING.AND GUESS WHAT???? SOCIAL SECURITY SAYS NO,YOU DON'T QUALIFY FOR DISABILITY UNDER THEIR STUPID CRAPPY LAWS.CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS? WELL I TOO WAS DENIED 3 TIMES THEN I WENT TO SS RIGHTS CENTER AND WE GOT A HEARING IN NOV.NOW IT'S ALMOST FEB AND I JUST GOT THE NO ANSWER.THE LAST DAY I WORKED WAS 2-18-05 I WORKED IN A GROCERY STORE AS CASHIER,CUSTOMER SERVICE DESK, SUPERVISOR AND CART PUSHER ETC...I USED TO DO IT ALL,NOW I'VE GOTTEN TO THE POINT WELL NOT ONLY HAVE I GAIN WEIGHT BUT DUE TO THE PAIN WHO CAN EXCERCISE AND NOT MUCH WITH ALL THE RESTRICTIONS.I WAS TRYING TO GET A GASTRIC BYPASS BUT MY INSURANCE WON'T COVER IT,SO I'M SCREWED.ONE THING I CAN SAY ABOUT THE 1ST SURGERY THAT IT TOOK AWAY THE INCONTINENCE I HAD TO WHERE I HAVE ACCIDENTS MAYBE 2-3 TIMES A MONTH INSTEAD OF EVERYDAY LIKE BEFORE.MY ARMS ARE CRAP SINCE SURGERY. IT TOOK 3-4 MONTHS BEFORE I COULD USE MY RIGHT ARM.I COULD ONLY MOVE MY WRIST UP AND DOWN.MY LEGS I GET NIGHT TREMORS AND I USE A CANE IF I GO ANYWHERE BECAUSE I STILL FALL BUT NO AS MUCH AS I USED TO.I HAVE TO SEE A SHRINK FOR DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY, PAIN MGMNT FOR LIDOCAINE SHOTS AND TAKE VICODIN FOR PAIN, XANEX FOR ANXIETY AND CELEXA FOR DEPRESSION.LIFE GOES ON BUT DAMMNIT!!!
SO I TRULY UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL AND I WISH YOU LUCK WITH DISABILITY,MY ATTNY WANTS TO APPEAL IT SO I HAVE 60 DAYS NOW I HAVE TO GET TO A NEUOROLOGIST SEE HOW IT GOES.THANX FOR BEING HERE TO TALK TO.I'VE EVEN POSTED POETRY ON MY FEELINGS IF YOU GET THE CHANCE TO READ THEM GOD BLESS~~~~~ESTHER:)

I am here and I am sorry, I have been trying to post for two weeks and get so messed up that I erase every one or I end up misplacing it.

Yes I do have a little box for my meds, It is 4 times a day box because I take meds 4 times a day. Right now it is a life saver because I can't remember my name let alone when to take which pill.

Ever since he increased my meds I can't think or write or any thing.

I get something half done get tired then forget what I was doing.

 

I was taking 40 mg of methadone (you are right about saying "meth" it doesn't sound right) every 6 hours plus in between every 6 hour I was taking Dilaudid 8 mg every 6  hours. Which ended up pain meds every 3 hours a day.  Plus all my other meds on top of that, Cymbalta 90 mgs, Glipizided LX ER 5mg 1pill  2X's a day, accolate 20 mg 2x times a day, like right now I am fighting to finish this, AND ITS HARD.  I can't concentrate.

I am also taking Klonipin 10 mgs 4X's, Soma 350 mgs 3x's,  and Halcion .25 mg 2 at nite,

Plus I have a nebulizer that I use 4 x's per day and I take Imatrex 100 mg PRN for my migraines.

So you see I NEED a box.

 

Right now I need to lay down because I am so tired and sore.

You wanted to know what I am taking  and how and I am having a rare lucid moment  So with all that I need a box to set up meds each day or I would be sunk.

I am fading fast right now...thanks you cuz for being concerned about me, it's rare that people care about what I am doing or even where I am.  Thanks to everyone here too, Diana w/H, Becca, Becky, Tanya, Brenda, Morgan, sweet Pickles any many I forgot.

 

Cuz,  I am really trying to figure out what to do with or about my meds.  I don't want to lose all my pain meds so if I tell the pain dude he might take everything away and I am just starting to get to the point where I am not screaming when I get up or lay down, and while I can drop off to sleep at the drop of a hat any time any place (including driving I found out last nite)  I can't stay asleep in bed at nite.  So I get 2 hrs a day of sleep.

But I don't scream hurting for once.

I would rather be a zombie which I think I am right now.  But I am not in pain.

So what to do is on the agenda.  Any ideas??

 

love ya

PK

Hey, Brenda...I hope you get over your cold quickly, and kitty too. 

 

I have been fighting an extra bad bout of irritable bowel syndrome.  I don't dare go anywhere until afternoon, when it settles down. Even a short trip to my son's bus stop in the morning is agonizing, and high risk for an accident...fiber schmiber!!  Metamucil can only do so much.  Peptobismol works the best.  Many other diarrhea preparations contain lactose...a stupid thing to put in diarrhea medicine, as that is one of the things you are supposed to avoid when having an attack, plus I am lactose intolerant!!  The diarrhea end of the IBS is more of a problem for me than constipation.  I've had to abandon my cart in the middle of the grocery store to make a mad dash for the restroom!!  (and then hope that nobody else is in there)...have been known to use the mens room in an emergency, when the ladies room is occupied!!  Some stores need to get more than one toilet!! 

 

I got off track with the exercise over the weekend...With hubby and kids home all day, it's hard to find the time or the room for exercise...plus, I don't like an audience when I am exercising.  When the IBS lets up, I'll get back to the stair stepper today.

 

Saturday, I will be going to the Solo & Ensemble festival with my older 2 boys, for their trumpet solos.  Our older son only started 3 weeks ago working on his solo...good luck to him!! He says he plays better under pressure...we'll see about that!!  Our middle son is a little more dedicated...I hope he can stay calm for his performance. They will be performing for my youngest son's class tomorrow afternoon, and will have a recital Thursday night, to get them used to playing in front of an audience...sort of a dress rehersal.  The youngest one is breaking from "family tradition".  He is learning the clarinet...just learning in a slow, casual manner, as he won't be in band for a couple of years...he wants to play the saxaphone, but his hands are too small right now...the clarinet is a good way to start.

 

Brenda, I hope the lemon and honey tea does some good...without the bourbon, is it just called a "hot Tod"?

 

I hope all have a good day...prof, looking forward to your posts today...hope you are feeling OK. 

 

Hugs and Prayers...Becky

welcome --

 

... although i am sorry for all the suffering and disappointment that brought you here!

 

(housekeeping notes:  typing in all caps = shouting when online and the post you have responded to was written in 2005, so you may not get a response from karen... but then again, maybe you will!)

 

i was turned down for ssdi because i lacked sufficient work credits (i lacked ONE lousy unit) because most of my teaching jobs put my money in special accounts for which i was never vested -- i was getting my own education and had to move around the country -- and world!

my best friend has offered to hire me to work here at home for her and so get that one credit... and i don't know why i haven't taken her up on it.

 

believe me, i know how lucky i am to have work-related longterm disability... when i started my last job, the benefit options were very good and i went for all that i thought i might ever need.  the LTD cost just a few bucks per paycheck.  the insurance company (UNUMPROVIDENT) requires that you apply for SSDI because then they can offset their portion. 

 

my doctor has told me that i am 100% permanently disabled and not to worry about the insurance -- but that is all well and good for him to say!  he is a great doctor but there is always the chance that UNUMP will go out of business or something -- and what would happen then?

 

i wish you the appeal -- it doesn't sound even remotely fair that you've been turned down!  i hope your lawyer kicks butt...

 

keep posting,

prof