Quote From: hopeless1today i'm going through a so many different emotions and i'm not sure i'll get a reply now but tonight is my last night with my husband. tomorrow he has to turn himself into authorities for committing a crime. he was out on his own recognizance but was on probation and had rules to follow. well...he choose not to follow them completely. he has been smoking pot. he has been doing this to "self-medicate" himself. he is bi-polar and has been put on various medications that he has had allergic reactions to u name it. then he's been having troubles sleeping and he's been going through different sleep meds to help that. anyway...he hasn't been working a steady job so now that he has to surrender he's done nothing to set me and my daughter up. on top of that i've had to spend money this week to fix my vehicle so nothing major goes wrong with it and he got his last unemployment check today...only for 1 wk instead of the usual 2. tonight he says he needs to take out $120 for a money order to put into his commissary when he gets to prison. i'm angry, sad, mad, frustrated, scared, alone. i have a few friends that know about this but i can't fall on them completely. that isn't fair to them. but my closest friend of so many years i thought would be understanding and supportive...and i can't say she isnt' but...i owe her money and she wants to know when i'll get her paid. she knows that i'm going to be down to one income and he's done nothing to help us when this day came. i haven't forgotten that i owe her money and my intentions r to pay her back but right now i'm worried about heat for the house, food for my daughter...i'm going to have my car repo'd and file backruptcy. but back to my feelings tonight. this is our last night together and i'm angry with him. i'm mad that he didn't get jobs and put money away for us. that he didn't do things around the house to help me with the cold weather or stuff that needs tended to. he's asked me if i'll b there when he gets out. right now i'm pissed that he asked that question. how could he? right now i want to ball him out instead of snuggle with him. as u can see i could go on, and on. i just need someone to talk to, listen, and give me advice. i need to seek counseling. i know that but unfortunately there is nothing free around here for that unless i have no income and i don't have the $70 to pay for a one time visit. i need a friend...these next few days r going to be unbelieveable emotionally for me.
Wow; I thought I had problems but when I read this I cry along with you.
Well; How long are you married and did you know all of t his before marriage and during mariage?
If you did then you will have to take accountability for what happens. I am sorry but have to
deal with your emotions and all of the pain whether its in church or free counseling. They do
have support groups for this. You may want to check into a 12-step program or coda. Codependent
anonymous because you might be an enabler. I say this because I am an enabler also only
I enabled an abusive man and let him get away with it.
You must have known this was coming and knew that a drug addict or bi-polar person wouldnt
help you financially or emotionally so now you have to worry about you and your daughter.
Can you stay with a family member or have one stay with you?
Why did you have to wait around for him to put money away for you. Why didnt you put money away for yourself knowing this was coming. I am not judging just trying to understand.
Are you going to wait for him or do you want a better life for you and your daughter for you know he
will do this again right? Get Help anyway you can. Church, CODA, Womens agencies, social services
whatever and fix YOU so that you dont keep repeating this pattern.