Let me by first telling you that I am married and have 2 children. My husband and I have been married for 7 years. I have been through a lot in my life being a child of alcoholic parents, My mother also died when my daughter was just 3 months old from being an alcoholic. I have a mentally challenge sister whom between me and my husband help my father with her.
My question is how to deal with a mother in law. I have always tried to get along with her, but sometimes it is very difficult. She has always been one that would rather buy my children anything and everything that they want to get them to love her. I don't always agree with that, but I accept that is how she is. My problem with her has always been that she will call my son, and tell him she is going to come and get him and they are going to go do something, and then doesn't show up. And let me add, that she doesn't have alot to do with my daughter. This is not a one time thing, this has happend since my mother passed away 5 years ago. I have always expressed to her that just not to call and tell him she is going to get him, just to show up. Or if she does tell him, to atleast be there as she promised.
Well a couple of months ago, she told my son he could come up and play with her and they would swim, well she was not able to do it again, because she was going out to eat with her step-grandchild. My son cried forever it seemed like. So I have been a little upset. About a week or two later I found out that she told her sister, That I am a pretend mother, I just act like I care about my children. That I am not a good mother to her grandchildren, or her son. She told her that she has never liked me or will she ever like me, and that she would like to try and take my children away from me.
I do not have to say that this made me very angry, however I did not say anything to her. Now a couple of weeks later, it was my husbands sisters wedding shower, and my mother-in-law hit me twice in the face while my children were both holding my hands as we were leaving. I have not spoken to her since.
my husband has still talked with her, and my daugter. However my son will not have anything to do with her. Even though I have tried to explain that its ok, and sometimes grownups do childish things, that she is still his grandmother.
My mother-in-law, will not let this rest, she is still telling people that I'm not a good wife, and that my husband is unhappy in our marrige. I have asked my husband this and he says this is untrue. That he is very happy to be with me.
It is very hard to have this going on in my family, is there any advise on how to deal with my mother-in-law. I feel I can't trust her, or that I should ever go around her again. However, I love my husband and I do not want him to feel that he is in the middle between us. Because after losing my mother, I would never want to be in the way of my husband and his mother. Because to me that is a bond that should not be broken.
Thanks for any advise you can give. thanks
