Topic : 03/06 Etiquette Dilemmas

This is  a helpful link someone gave earlier.  If you read the other pages on the site, they are also helpful.  The site specifically addresses this problem in children as well as adults.  Funny thing is that this site says the problem will most often be associated most with a certain person like your son has issues with his dad in this case.

http://www.hyperacusis-info.org/wst_page10.html

Look at the top of this page, under the topic  description,  click the 
link  that says "Find out what happened on the show."  On the right
side of that page is a  grey area that  says "Related Resources" and
down toward the bottom of the page is a section that says "Related
Links". 

     I have a similar pet peeve with cell phones.  My husband and I were surprised by a visit from his father and his new wife.  Unfortunately it was our 15th anniversary and we had made dinner plans for the evening.  After much effort, and at the last minute, we were able to change the restaurant to suite her "special diet needs", and went out for a celebratory dinner with them.  She talked over the waiter the whole time he tried to tell us the specials of the day, and then made him repeat them when he tried to leave.  She made several phone calls during the meal, and spoke so loudly other diners began shooting us dirty looks.  (This was a four star french restaurant, which she insisted on).  She tried to order every appetizer on the menu "just to try it", and when the dessert menu came, she tried to do the same.  My father in law spent the whole evening trying to rein her in, while my husband and I were feeling more and more annoyed that she was dominating and ruining our special evening.  Then, with after dinner drinks she tried to order a bottle of Dom!  And the real corker, when the check came, we paid for the entire meal!

My mother has a horrible habit of going around talking on her phone while doing everything.  She'll shop, check out, order lunch, etc.  You never know really who she is talking to!  And I have a friend who is a check out girl at a local specialty grocery store.  She says people blatantly ignore her all the time while talking on the phone.  She and I both think it is really rude.  If I receive an important call while checking out somewhere, I answer the call, but quickly say I am at the check out and will call them back in five minutes.  I also appologize to the clerk and let them know it was an important call I was waiting on. 

What a great point you bring up.  What is SW side of the story.  Like Dr. Phil said, " even with the thinest pancake there's 2 sides."  I love that saying. :-)  I wonder if we will get to hear from the FA or some of the passengers.  My guess though is we probably won't because the don't feel the need to indulge in 15 minutes of fame! 

Might relieve sinus/ear pressure as a preventative, especially if the kid had had a cold, or was battling allergies. A decongestant like Sudafed would accomlish similar effects if the sinus issue were not due to allergies.

 

Drowsiness can be also a side effect of most of the OTC antihistamines, except Claritin.  Unfortunately, they can also do the opposite, act as a stimulant. So much for that flight attendant's "baby Benadryl" medical advice.

i just dont understand why the young woman on todays show STILL feels she needs to bring a lawsuit upon the airline for kicking her poorly dressed behind off of the airplane. my husband is a pilot. this issue has come up in our household. he feels she was dressed just fine. i, on the other hand, disagree wth the way she dressed. she could have better taste in her attire. when i travel i dress comfortably. i dont want to worry about pulling my skirt down or catching someone looking down my blouse. she keeps reinstating she just wants an apologie from the ceo of the airline and when she received it the snot came out of her shell. at first i thought she was fine with the apologie and free tickets. then her lawyer spoke and her attitude totally changed. she went back on her word. this is why there are so many attorneys out there making bg bucks as well as ripping of US citizens who pay big tax dollars. its ashameful. by looking at her and her family i dont think they are in need of the money they are probably trying to seek. hope this one gets shut down.

Dr Phil,

I'm astonished this is a very slippery slope, I wouldn't fly that airline for nothing!!! They should be ashamed and good for Kyla for making a fuss. Public humiliation is never going to be the answer. If they were so concerned about  her attire,how is it that she was able to board the plane before the issue of her attire was questioned?

How about this, was it age discrimination because she is young. If she were 35 and dressed similarly or more provactively would she have been treated the same way? I bet not! Was someone on a power trip or intimidated because she is young and attractive and confident.

I used to watch that television show about southwest and the more I watched the more insane their whole corporate concept / policies seemed to me.

I'm always going to be on the side individuality. If the "sight" of Kyla's outfit was offensive, what will be found to be offensive next ? obesity ?people have to see fat people too, or certain colors? Burkas? Afros? Southwest just lost my business til the end of time!!!  

Dr Phil, you were way off base with your solution for the woman who was being driven crazy by her etiquette challenged family.  First of all, it is RUDE to pop gum.  I realize millions of people are doing it, but it is quite rude - especially if it is bothering someone.  Secondly, this lady does not have a stress related problem, but a case of hyperacusis.  Most health professionals don't know about this syndrome, which was diagnosed in 1995.  One of the forms of hyperacusis is called Super Sound Sensitivity Syndrome or "4 S."  Hyperacusis is a problem with the inner ear in which a person hears sounds differently than the average bear.  I have it and I can hear the smallest sounds, while those around me cannot.  I can hear the lightest sound, like the tiny sounds going on in the inside of the ceiling fan, although my husband can't hear it at all.  Since he can't hear it, he can't understand why it bothers me, but it keeps me awake at night.  When I discovered this syndrom online, I realized I have always had this and the truth is that I have a light case.  Other people who have this syndrome are nearly driven crazy by every day sounds.  I have figured out a way to manage my syndrome.  I buy soft yellow foam earplugs and I use them to filter out these annoying sounds.  For example, I can't stand going to the movies and trying to focus on the movie while people are talking, chewing gum, crunching ice and popcorn, so I put earplugs in while I am watching the movie.  I can still hear everything that is said, but without all the little sounds that are in the theatre.  When my husband is eating I put an earplug in my left ear if he is sitting to my left and that dulls down the sound of his eating so that it doesn't bother me.  I keep earplugs in my car, my purse, beside the bed and wherever I might need them.  If something is bothering me, I don't yell at anyone or get upset, I just go into the bathroom, pop in a couple of earplugs, and then go out and enjoy my family.  I don't beat up on  myself because I know that I have hyperacusis and that I am doing what I need to do to keep myself comfortable.  This is absolutely NOT a psychological condition.  It is a physical condition of the inner ear.  It may be worse when someone is stress, but destressing someone is not going to make the condition disappear.  I'm not going to get on you too much about the fact that you didn't do your homework well enough on this before your show, Dr Phi, but it would be nice if you contacted that poor woman and let her know that this is not the result of a stress problem.  And, again, it is RUDE and disrespectful for anyone to pop gum at their mother or anyone else just to be annoying.  Gum popping is rude, so kids should only be doing it when they are around someone who isn't annoyed by it - like another 12 year old.  http://hyperacusis.net/ 

     Recently while in Europe I had several strangers on the street refer to me as a whore.  Since I was not dressed provocatively, wore little make-up etc., I stopped the third group and asked them why they would call a stranger a whore.  (I even had an old woman call me a whore!)  The young men said they heard me speak, knew I was American, and everyone in Europe knows American women are whores.  How's that for a nice reputation? 

I think of the movie Far and Away, when Nicole Kidman's character is on the boat, and she crosses her legs and lets her ankles show, causing a stir among the men on the ship?  Seems far and away doesn't it?