Topic : 03/26 "Change My Face, Change My Race"

My father is 50% Italian, so I guess that makes me 25% Italian.  I have struggled with having a big nose myself.  Mostly I got picked on about my nose in school.  I have always hated the way my nose has looked.  I know what Brad is going through because I go through it myself.  I have a sister who has the perfect little nose, not to mention she is really pretty.  I am attractive myself, except for my big nose.  I am a very strong, intelligent person who is not influenced by any others but myself.  I also have a deviated septum and have had problems breathing through my right side of my nose.  I have also checked into having a nose job along with possibly fixing my septum and breathing problems, but even if I didn't  have the breathing problems I would still consider the nose job.  I feel that it is Brad's nose and nobody else's and if he wants to change his appearance to make himself look and feel better about himself that is his business and not his mother's or realative's business.  My mother isn't all for me changing my nose, but mostly she is concerned with my nose collapsing and not the fact that  I would change my ethic backgound.  My ethic backgound and where I come from doesn't change just because I change my appearance and neither will Brad's ethic background change.  His mom and relative's need to get over theirself and respect the fact that he wants to make himself  look better.  You go "Brad"!  Karen from Michigan

When you change your face you erase a part of who you are and who you are identified with.

I think most women choose men who have facial features that they hope will show up in the faces of their future children, and if you change that, it's like lying. More importantyly in Brad's case say he has a son or daughter some day that ends up with his "original nose" what will he/she say or think about theirself. I can only imagine they would feel alone and possibley rejected by their dad who had surgery to remove his "imperfections". I think before Brad goes under the knife he should accept himself and go outside of his "circle" to see how people would respond to him. I certainly didn't find his nose too large.

Uhh, no one is blaming caucasians or saying that they can't be proud of who they are - in fact, it's the very opposite - that too many minorities have inferiority complexes b/c the media doesn't show attractive members of minority groups.

Otoh, the media is to blame for spreading idealized versions of "beauty" - which is why many impressionable young people deal with eating disorders, opt for breast implants, etc.

And it's not just women either - with the spread of shirtless young males w/ 6-packs in Calvin Klein, Gucci, A&F ads - the no.1 reason why young males take steroids is not to gain strength/faster recovery time for sports - but to get that cut, 6-pack physique.

I understand people wanting to change the extreme noses, eyes, etc...but wait...no I don't...or do I? I've never been one of the popular "pretty" girls but over the years I have struggled to be happy with myself...

I love the differences in people's looks.  It's so boring seeing the picture perfect models and with the ethnicity looks people are so beautiful.  I guess I always look into the eyes of the person I meet...either they eminate beauty or not...and it all comes from the inside for me.  It's sad to me that it's hard for people to embrace their differences.  I've always tried to make my 5 kids feel good about their looks no matter what. I think they are beautiful and it seems they are very self confident and their energy just flows from their beings.  We don't have small noses or are bright blonds (sometimes they are) and are not the sculpted bodies ..although I think they are perfect..and they seem to be happy.  I've taught them to eat right..even tho we eat wrong alot:)..and I always tried to instill self worth into them...I told them if you are not beautiful on the inside it doesn't matter how you look on the outside...people will feel your beauty.

I've tried to make sure they are content with who they are.....I think if we were all content with who we are and not worry about what other people think about our looks (and by the way most of those people who judge should look into the mirror themselves and see their shallowness and sadness) ...anyway if we would embrace our differences in looks the world would be an interesting place instead of cookie cutter emptiness... I do not criticize those who want a nose job, etc.. No matter what they do if they are beautiful on the inside their looks really won't change anyway......

 He should not be in a marriage and raising children, subjecting those children to such unbelievable beliefs...  A marriage is a partnership, a two way street... He has to compromise and realize that he isn't God, because he really seems to think he is a god... Get off your high horse and realize you're human like everyone else and you need to realize your actions and beliefs are affecting everyone around you!!!!  If James really loved his wife and appreciated her, he'd compromise in parenting, and in the marriage itself.