Topic : 03/26 "Change My Face, Change My Race"

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Created on : Friday, September 14, 2007, 03:47:34 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 09/20/07) Most everyone has thought about removing imperfections -- a nip here, a tuck there. But some people want plastic surgery to erase their ethnic identity! First up is James. He says he doesn’t want to change anything about himself because Asians are intellectually superior, and women should obey men. His wife, Roseanna, says he’s a controlling racist who demeans women, and she says she needs help before he corrupts their 11-year-old son. James says he’s ready to serve Roseanna her walking papers if she doesn’t become more obedient. Is James a controlling bigot or simply misunderstood? Then, Dr. Phil explores the pros and cons of eyelid surgery -- one of the most common cosmetic procedures for Asian women … and one of the most controversial! He talks to a woman who had a fold added to her upper eyelid, a plastic surgeon who performs these procedures and two guests who believe the surgery erases Asian heritage. Plus, Brad says he hates his nose, and he wants plastic surgery to look less Italian. His mother, Debbie, says she loves the way he looks -- big schnoz and all! Brad’s surgery is only a month away. Can Debbie convince him he's perfect just the way he is before he goes under the knife? Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.


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March 26, 2008, 7:39 pm PDT

Huh??

Quote From: alla2005

Go for it.  My parents never had my teeth straightened when I was a child.  When I was 21, I had it done.  My parents told me that God would punish me for doing it.  They don't live inside your body and dont understand what it means to you.  If you feel better about yourself, go for it.  God will love you whether you do the surgery so not!

"God will punish you if you have your teeth straightened??" That is such a messed up thing to say to a child! Shame on your parents for using God in that way.......that's the kind of thing that turns people against religion.

 

I am a Christian, and am always dismayed when people use God or the Bible to hammer someone into doing what they want you to do, rather than what is Biblical.

 
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March 26, 2008, 8:05 pm PDT

Sexy Nose

This is for Brad.

Brad,

I LOVE YOUR NOSE!  I think that your nose and facial features are sexy. To be honest with you, I didn't even notice your nose until you mentioned it.  I was however, fascinated by the way you talk.  It reminded me of a very close friend of mine.  Good luck with your surgery, if you think that that is the best thing to do. 

 

Caterina_Baby

 
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March 26, 2008, 8:57 pm PDT

Italian Pride

This is to NO offense to anyone Itallian.

I dont think that Brads family was concerned with his nose at all. I think they were simply consumed in this Italian pride and overshadowed the fact that Brad feels like he has a large nose and overshadows his self esteem.

In my humble opinion, I think that regardless of his heritage, and regardless of who he looks like, ultimately his feelings are what should be considered. He is bothered about his nose enough that he wants it changed. He feels like others judge him on it. The thing I think people have to realize is that hes not questioning the rightness or wrongness of the people who are judging him or see his nose first (not saying all do, the last poster said they thought it was sexy). I think that he is trying to change something that he hasn't ever liked about himself and is going to benefit him. I don't think his family is thinking about this and don't think they care that it will benefit him because they are so clouded by their Italian pride. I also don't think that he is trying to abandon his heritage either, We all know that Itallians are characterized by more things than just their nose.


 
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March 26, 2008, 9:56 pm PDT

Book Smart James

Quote From: cndrlla

I have to wonder why this man, who thinks races other than Asian are inferior, has chosen to marry an African-American and then a Mexican-Irish, rather than an Asian woman....and then spend so much time putting these women down?

 

He's book-smart and street-stupid!

  

I didn't notice a single intelligent response from the poor guy, and Phil actually took it pretty easy on him by giving James plenty of ops to explain himself.  James may be good at memorizing quotes, but at actually applying knowledge?  Really again, I do feel sorry for ignorant people like this guy.  They just get so LUCKY sometimes--happening upon this beautiful woman with character in the midst her self-esteem drought.

 

On the smart Asian subject, I used to also believe "they" were smarter. Really, I just thought it was natural.  But my college advisor is Japanese and she pretty much set me straight on my stereotype.  Asians try very, very hard.  Their parents set high expectations for them, and the kids do not want to bring shame to their families in the form of academic failure.  Lots of pressure!!!!  They study day and night. So not smarter, just trained not to be lax. 

 

At least Smart Asian James is smart enough to realize he's not smart enough to trap a smarter Asian.

 

Plain white cracker girl Missouri 

 
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March 26, 2008, 9:57 pm PDT

change my face

How can I reach Dr. Peter Newen?
 
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March 26, 2008, 10:14 pm PDT

Culture

Quote From: rianashley

I believe when the person is getting plastic surgery solely to change the ethnicity of the way they look in order to appear more like another culture says to that culture that they think something is wrong with the way that culture looks. So I can see why another culture would be disturbed by this. Personally, I feel sorry for the person who gets plastic surgery solely for this purpose because they don't love and accept themselves as beautiful. Well personally, I don't care if a person's face is symmetrical or asymmetrical as I'm not that shallow to perceive beauty in a typical fashion. I find people who have something different about their physical features more interesting to look at, as well as more interesting to photograph, sketch and paint , than people who are considered beautiful by typical standards of beauty.

Another "culture" being disturbed?  That speaks for a VERY large group.  A few people from a culture may be bothered due to their own personal insecurities...but the changes of an individual's appearance only affects the individual.  I don't get "offended" when white people tan, tan, tan, or when they speak with a black ghetto accent...I'm Italian and if my nose was too big, I'd surgerize it down--nothing to do with my ethnicity and everything to do with my nose being TOO BIG for my face, and not wanting my nose to precede ME, and letting the God-gifted surgeons ensure my feelings to never be hurt again about my nose. 

 

Yes, people who look different are interesting to look at, but that is from an external perspective.  How does the different-looking person feel about it?  And symmetry has nothing to do with shallow--a balanced view is initially attractive.  And unfortunately, looks are the first thing we notice.  Without eyes, this wouldn't be a discussion. 

 
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March 26, 2008, 11:47 pm PDT

03/26 "Change My Face, Change My Race"

Quote From: caterina_baby

This is for Brad.

Brad,

I LOVE YOUR NOSE!  I think that your nose and facial features are sexy. To be honest with you, I didn't even notice your nose until you mentioned it.  I was however, fascinated by the way you talk.  It reminded me of a very close friend of mine.  Good luck with your surgery, if you think that that is the best thing to do. 

 

Caterina_Baby

I'm with you Caterina, it gives him character, and trust me, later on he will regret doing it, as that type of thing you can never reverse, ask Michael Jackson! 
 
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March 27, 2008, 4:15 am PDT

03/26 "Change My Face, Change My Race"

Quote From: _marie_

This show is not about race or racial issues.

 

This show is about INDIVIDUALS who are dissatisfied with themselves and the various way they act it out.

 

Marie

that is true in many ways but when a man such as james goes on national tv with a story such as his and his wife sits there and tells the world he calls people of a differnt race names in front of small children, well i do think james qualifies as a rasist. just beacouse he was married to a african american woman in the past and had 3 children by her does not nor will never make it alright to use that N word when he sees a person of not the same color as himself, this country has to wake up and put a stop to all the name calling, small children are the suffers of such stupid acts, a man would simply pop his chops for name calling, but seems james isnt only acting like a rasist he seems to act as only a coward would act. i sure hope dr phil was able to inlighten james a bit, if dr phil fails i very sure god will not.
 
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March 27, 2008, 4:52 am PDT

dr phil what is the world headin for? it upset me to sit and listen to james and all his bull, this is why, people who act like he acts are the reason this happens

By KAREN HAWKINS, Associated Press Writer
51 minutes ago
 


CHICAGO - The morning trip to school for dozens of teenagers here had all the normal signs: bleary eyes, oversized jackets zipped up against the chill, the seemingly endless wait for the bus. But there was tension underlying the routine: The trip was under the watchful eyes of parents, an alderman, a principal and police.

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The escort to and from Crane Tech High School this week, dubbed 'Operation Safe Passage' is just one of the ways Chicago is dealing with a wave of violence that has stunned the city.

Since September, 20 Chicago Public Schools students have been killed, 18 by gunfire. Last school year, 24 of the more than 30 students killed were shot to death, compared with between 10 and 15 fatal shootings in the years before.

'The loss of life that we've seen among our young people is ... devastating,' said school district spokesman Michael Vaughn. 'This gun nonsense has reached a crisis level.'

The number of violent deaths involving students in the nation's third-largest school district has increased so dramatically in the last two years that police are increasing school patrols and soon will be the first department in the country with live access to thousands of security cameras mounted outside — and inside — schools.

Chicago Public Schools is one of the only urban districts to track how many students are killed by guns — though none of the slayings have occurred on school property.

Nationally, homicide was the second-leading cause of death for young people ages 10 to 24 in 2004, and of those killed, 81 percent were killed with a firearm, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Chicago's overall homicide rate, like that in other major cities, dropped to a record low in 2007. But the murders that do occur are hitting young people hard, frightening students and parents, and prompting everyone from Mayor Richard M. Daley to activists to call for action.

Operation Safe Passage began this week. It provides escorts for students from the ABLA Homes public housing development to Crane Tech High School. Many of the 120 students from the housing project have not been to school since March 7 because they fear retaliation after a reputed gang member from ABLA shot and killed another student who lived on a rival gang's turf.

Three of Michelle Johnson's children attend Crane, and she says the escorts help — somewhat.

'For right now, I feel it's kinda safe,' said Johnson, who added that she is willing to take her children to school every day until the situation improves.

Daley recently announced a new resource for police — access to the 4,500 security cameras mounted inside and outside about 200 elementary and high schools.

The real-time video from the cameras once was available only to school officials, but now police and the city's Office of Emergency Management and Communications will be able to see it as well. Daley said indoor cameras will be used only in emergencies.

Daley also has rolled back the curfew times for minors by half an hour, to 10 p.m. on weekdays and 11 p.m. on weekends.

Many observers insist the issue isn't a school problem but a symptom of overall violence in the city. In fact, students in some of the city's most violent neighborhoods say school — with metal detectors, private security guards and uniformed police officers — is the one place they feel safe.

Antigun activists and officials say the violence highlights a dangerous reality: Arguments among young people that used to be resolved with fistfights now end in gunfire.

'They're just shooting out of rage,' said the Rev. Michael Pfleger, an outspoken priest on the city's South Side whose church is putting up a $2,500 reward for information each time a CPS student is killed. The Chicago Board of Education has promised to match with its own $2,500 reward.

Tio Hardiman, executive director of the anti-violence group CeaseFire, said many young people consider a firearm their only protection. The way to reduce violence is to stop petty arguments among young people before they escalate into gunfire, Hardiman said.

'A lot of young guys in the community, first of all, would rather get caught with a gun than without a gun,' Hardiman said. 'There's a need a dire need for more conflict resolution training.'

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On the Net:

Chicago Public Schools: http://www.cps.k12.il.us      //////////////////////////////////////////////// if parents do not teach children to love others and respect them for who and what they are well, james your children may one day grow up to cause another parent to have to live through pain such as this, act as you will infront of your wife she is a adult and if she likes it as she must you two will be happy for many years, but please becareful what you say and how you act infront of your children, after you finish growing up james you will see just how stupid you looked on dr phil, be a man, act like a man  better yet act like a dad!!!!! you are one weather you like it or not, james this could be one of your children in this story one day, i pray to god its not, but maybe this will make you STOP AND THINK b4 you act.

 
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March 27, 2008, 6:47 am PDT

For Brad

I understand about your choice to fix something that bothers you, and you should do it if it makes you happy. It is obvious though, that you posess the qualities no surgery could ever enhance--character, dignity, and brains.

 

Mom should be so proud of you and not worry--the grandkids will have the nose too!

 

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