Topic : Difficulty Forming Friendships

It may depend upon where you are living.  Some areas like the northeast in U.S. can be a little more reserved and take awhile to warm up.  I would just be yourself and maybe join groups which interest you, like chess, book clubs, hiking, whatever your interests are.  You would be more apt to meet people with similiar interests.  I, too, have found it easier in business situations, at least in the past.  I think it is a little like acting, we have a role to play so it is not as threatening to us personally. Now, that I am older, it doesn't seem to be as much of a problem at the superficial level.  Guess you learn to not care what people think...   

As a teenager and young woman,  I always seemed to be attracted to the "shy ones" and I was shy, reserved and insecure so it was a no win situation. But I am sure there are  great friends out there waiting to be introduced who won't be put off by your shyness.  

  Or perhaps, you will meet some people online from your state.  Good luck.  

Yes, I have trouble.  I tend not to be very good about maintaining.  Not an inviting risk for those looking.  Love to hear from others but hate to intrude, bother them.  Makes it a bit one-sided.  On the other hand, I am supportive, a good listener, most of the time and not possessive or demanding. I enjoy my down time and have no trouble entertaining myself. Get embarrassed talking about myself, though 

I find it hard making friends because I have Aspeger's. [I wasn't diagnosed until a few years ago.]  

Many people tend to keep their distance because I have trouble relating to people (socially). I work at remembering to ask people how they are, once they've asked how I am, and making conversations.  

Past friendships were with controlfreaks, dependent people or those who said they were friends but didn't want to be seen with me-let alone spend time doing fun activities.  

Two of my sisters used to tell me that nobody liked me-which didn't do much for my self-esteem. Mum constantly insinuated I wasn't a nice person whilst I was growing up. These days, I don't talk to them as they never seem to say anything nice to me.  

Anyway, I found this quote in John Laws' Book of Irreverent Logic: "It's crazy to think everybody hates you - not everybody knows you." (page 138).  

That is so true. Not everybody knows me-especially most people living outside Australia.  

However, I am getting on well with my youngest sister and my brother. My sister gives regular updates on my nephew, now aged 15 months. He is a gorgeous little boy.  

Dang it! I can't change the type colour to purple! 

Hello.  I would be happy to chat with you online.  I have difficulty making friendships to some extent.  I can make acquaintances but not the deeper kind.  Maybe it is due to trust issues or maybe it is not making the right connection with the right people.  But, I am female; a single parent of a grown son. I don't watch lifetime too much though I used to until my son kept referring to it as the female nightly soap opera drama.  ;->   

   I am one of those women who is really into self improvement and working on being the woman I should have been 30 years ago... Better late than never.  

  P.S. I don't know a mother who wouldn't love a break from the kids no matter how much we love them.  Someone who understands the pressures, the frustrations and the emotions of being a mom.  It is an unbelievably tough job.  Hope to talk to you soon.  

Hi   

Can I relate to your conversation. I too am a sounding board, it seems not by choice. My daughter says I'm too nice to people and they just take advantage of it. I look at it as being courteous and thoughtful.  I am always looking for self help books and articles to improve myself. And I wonder why others can't seem to see their selves.  

I am looking for a person to relate to. Move back to my home town 6 years ago, thought the friend thing would be better in that I know your back ground. NOT. It's just family that I end up communicating with, and that is definitely one sided. I'm 52, married, with two children,  and going though the "hot flash stage".  

Linda  

It's not very easy when you're surrounded by people that are into drugs and bully you. I had a bad experience with my jr high and high school where I grew up. People get stuck in a downward spiral and when you knew only that kind of impression, you have a hard time trusting anyone. I've learned that a smile can open a door, sometimes you get a smile back and maybe a bit of small talk if they're feeling friendly. I've made a lot of friends just by smiling and asking how is everything. People like to talk if they know that someone cares about them. That's a good start. :)  

Kristi