Topic : Difficulty Forming Friendships

Having sex before marriage is wrong.....  Having a child outside of weddlock after having made a wrong, is right...

Forcing a relationship to develope simply because a child was the result of the sex before marriage is wrong...

Two wrongs don't make a right.

His relationship is building with his child, your child.... that's all you two have in common.  Move on with your life and do the right thing in the future.... No sex before marriage and learn how to recognize the best mate for you for life, not just for right now....

How....

Get to know the person, is he a Christian or does he worship the devil or does he go to church at all, who is his family, his friends, his likes, dislikes, how does he treat his mom and sisters, how did he treat his ex girlfirends.... how is his credit, does he have a criminal record, does he have a good job.... etc....  how does his attributes match up to yours.

Don't tell your friends all of your business. They usually will not tell you the best answers.

Sincerely

Beauty is only skin deep.  (that's a song)

In high school, you couldn't tell me that I wasn't cute as a button, fine and foxy... Course that was many years ago... but I was ranked at the top with all the cute and beautiful girls with brains and long black hair....

But.... You know there is always a but....

People still picked on me. They said my butt was so flat that if I sat down, I would slide out a chair....  I learned to laugh at it, cause after all I was flat as a pancake in those days...

Truth be told, I suddenly woke up one day and was standing in the mirror and said, hey, I'm cute... I was in the 7th grade... prior to that I thought I was so ugly that a group of crows was laughing at me while sitting on my grandma's clothes line.... Clearly it was all in my mine.

To this day, you can't tell me that I am not cute.... My husband tells me all the time, and man, just lift a camera and see who smiles first... that's me... runs in my family. We love those Kodak moments.

Someday, that will be you...

Sincerely

I'm not the kind to judge, I know you have a special gift to share. All I can say is my son's girlfriend also has epilepsy. She has encountered many struggles in her life. I love her with all my heart as my own daughter. I feel very lucky to love both of my son's girlfriends for who they are. I would do anything I could to try to help. I am not perfect either, btw (who wants to be perfect anyway?), but one day I voiced out loud that I wished to learn to love myself as I was, this was a while ago. All I can say is some pretty amazing things have happened since that time. And I noticed the amazing things have been happening all along. You've heard it before, but just maybe practice loving and nurturing yourself as you are. I wish you all the best. Cosmic rule #1 is that you are loved as you are. Very truly,

No matter which way I look at human relationships, it all seems kind of tricky to me. Can't force things ya know. Tricky is the best way I can describe relationships, even for people who do love themselves and have everything going for them. Some of my most alone time was spent in a relationship. It seems so simple, be kind, be truthful, be reasonable (not perfect), loyal to some degree, understanding would be nice. I think it has a lot to do with misinterpretations and intentions. No one is imune to misunderstandings. I'd like to tell you there is an easy answer. Maybe there is. In the book the Secret (I enjoyed much of that book), they talk about pretending your desire already exists, visualize it and act like you said, know it is happening. I believe it is the journey, how we treat each other, how we walk day to day. I could not tell you where you find your emphasis anymore than you can tell me where I find my emphasis. Once I wanted to understand the essence of the word Universe. U ni verse. U is a very interesting letter, I thought of flow like the opposite of resistance, one definition for U has to do with "internal energy" -- I think that is totally cool and freaky; "ni" in Lakota has to do with water and the essence of life, and verse is popularly understood as communication or song ,,, put it together and we have "flowing internal energy life song. " I like it, I like it a lot. But words are a little tricky too. All I can suggest is try to have some fun along the way. Lots of times people end up in relationships and are unhappy. It seems all we want is a little understanding and kindness and to be able to share these qualities with people or someone we really care about. Miracles do happen. I agree your circumstance sounds challenging, when I come to obstacles or roadblocks, I usually try to go around them. One thing I am learning too is to try to not get stuck on words, sticky as they may be. Para la vida.

Grandma