Topic : Debt

I am not a 'positive minded person', I am a factual minded person.  I find that positive minded people do not want to look at anything that isn't 'positive', they don't want to deal with the nasty now and now.  I give feedback based on what that person says and how I feel that they are saying it. 

I do however get upset when capable people wallow in self pity tooo long - instead of trying to do something about it.  NOW based on your message this time - and I know that you are intelligent 

but what are you doing for yourself - except complaining - Be good too yourself, it's legal.  I'll bet if you really wanted to pick yourself up and better yourself up - you would - so what are you waiting for??? 

If this is what you call being negative - then fine, but it's what I call having a 'factual mental attitude'. 

with each and every post that you make - I detect more and more intelligence.  I soo agree with you that 'tomorrow will be and if I let the judgment of others.....'  Tooo many people are affected by what others tell them - glad your not one of them.  If venting makes you feel better than vent - but also know that others may see it as complaining.   

Now since both of us know that you are intelligent - why not use the space between the ears a whole lot more??? 

Was that supposed to be a "pep talk" of some kind? I never doubted my intelligence, maybe you did, but I didn't. I don't remember trying to impress you with my intelligence or showing you a lack of it.  Now, don't take that out of context. I'm not claiming all knowledge by any means..but I'm not dumb, nor am I so arrogant that I don't see my own mistakes and "own" each and every one of them. I am living in reality and I know my limitations, my intelligence has nothing whatsoever to do with my disabilities. As for "using the space between my ears"...well it's got me to this old age so I guess it hasn't screwed me up completely. I know it's really easy to give others advice and not be able to fix your own problems. So, if your "creative criticism" with that lovely hint of sarcasm is helping you...blast a way. I don't want you to think that I have completely given up on life when some day's it really seems that way even to myself. I have several ambitious ideas that, unfortunately, take $. I have other priorities to care for first and then I'll get to those ambitions. Having a place of my own and being comfortable with myself without the influence of man in my life is my goal for now. Taking baby steps at my age is frustrating, but even if YOU don't know it, I know that I'm doing my best.  

Odd but I've checked your profile and I have a question. Not that it makes a big difference but are you male or female? 

I say one thing you come back with something else - now you ask if I am giving you a pep talk cheeese.  I just come from a point where you were expected to use your head first and to think, think, think. 

I sorta feel that I'm doing nonething but upsetting you - so I shall cease. 

I posted this question under a different topic, but received no input.  Perhaps I was in the wrong place.  I'm trying again here.

Recently on Dr. Phil there was a show with Star Jones about people that can't quite get it together.  There was a guest named Deann that didn't think she shouldn't start a relationship until she got out of debt.  She was given advice for getting out of debt, but the initial concern was not addressed.  I find myself in this situation and would like to know how others feel about this.  I have had several years filled with big financial hits which were beyond my control.  I was well on my way to being debt free before this.  I now find myself deeply and embarrassingly in debt.  I am dating, but do not let anyone know about the debt that I have.  I am doing my best to pay off my debt, but it will take many years.  I have been single for many years and financially independent.  I am 50 years old and do not want to spend the rest of my life alone because of bad luck that I have endured.  I feel dishonest by not letting my dates know about my financial situation.  I would want to know if they were in this situation.  I do not expect anyone to pay this off for me.  This is my debt and I will handle it.  But does this mean that I shouldn't get involved with someone until my debt is paid off?  The thought of that makes it all worse.

Thank you for "listening".  I really would appreciate your thoughts.....

This message board is for people who want to talk to each other, for help with their problems, or to vent/complain And I believe get some type of relief.   

You sound like you like your situation, want to and don't want to change.   

If your posting was just to vent - then fine, but if your posting was to seek help - then let people help you. 

I failed last night. 

10 days and I just walked out the door and went straight to the first available machine, sat down and lost my head, not to mention all the money again. 

I don't know why, I wish I did.  I got up yesterday morning and the thought of gambling was in my head all day long and it just kept hammering away at me and I finally gave in. 

I was sick about it when I got home, not because of losing money, sure that didn't help, but because I was doing so good. 

When I got home I was so mad at myself, I literally tried to beat myself up.  

So today I start over.  Today I start with Day One.  I will not beat myself up today, what's done is done.  Today I will do something constructive, something positive.   

God help me, I will stop this insanity.