Topic : Living on One Income

I never will get it. Me and money just dont get along. I have struggled all of my life.

I was married at 21 had two children right off. My marriage did not work. I stayed with my alcoholic husband for 10 years. I had choose to stay home and take care of the children while he worked. This left me without a job history when we divorced.

I became a waitress at the age of 31 and with child support I managed to survive. We had a roof over our head, but my kids did not get to have the things other kids did. Even just belonging to after school activities was impossible.

Well I then made a horrible mistake and met a man who had me fooled. We had a child together. His personality changed as soon as our son was born. He became violent and abusive. I left him, thank god, but he would and will still not pay support. He already owes over 15,000 to a child he wont admit is his. The goverment sent me the papers, thats how I know about the child. So why should I even waste my time and all the trouble to get money I wont ever see and be involved in a mess with a man who doesnt even want to see his own child.

My oldest child, 21 is in the Air Force. She is doing wonderful. Making as much money as I am.

She still needs help every now and then. I give it to her even though I cant really afford it. My second oldest is 20 he is having trouble finding himself. He is always in need of money. How do I say NO to my kids. Then I have my 11 year old who I is struggling in school. He needs tutoring. I am sending him to a school for help and I cant afford it. The bill just came, I dont know what to do. I cant take him out he needs the help. I have tried to get help at the school and they wont give it. He "has to be mentally handicaped to get help at school".

I cant get another job, he has no one to stay with him while I work. Plus this means he will never see the only parent or adult he has in his life.

Things have just been a mess when it comes to money. I just feel so horrible all the time. How can a single mother raise children successfully on one income? It is impossilbe!

I felt the same way.  Now my children are in school but my dilemma is finding reasonable childcare for them before or after school.  If half of what I would be making goes to childcare

it would be easier just to stay home.

I have a bachelors degree but what I find frustrating is that I have the education but not a lot of work history in that area.  So everytime I go for interviews I hear well you have the education but not the experience.  Any suggestions?

My wife and I are living off of one income. We just had a child and wanted our little girl to be raised by her mother, not a day care. Life has been frustrating because since we've been married, our financial stability has not improved. If anything it is declining, despite the fact in my 6 year career, my income has doubled.

We started off on the wrong foot with credit cards. I'm sure most can identify with that. I accept the blame but I think the credit card companies share the blame. I think they prey upon college students. I was given two credit cards, one with a $5,000 limit, and one with a $10,000 limit when I was an unemployed graduate student - the lender said "we can put your college loan amount down as income" to get me approved. Aside from that, we have struggled to reduce our debt since then. I have credit card debt and a $68,000 student loan to still payoff.

To add to our financial woes, I own a home near Atlanta, GA which we have not lived in for 4 years. We just can't get it sold. So, as I mentioned before, my income has doubled in the last 6 years, but now we live on my income alone, and I pay for two houses, two cars, and have loans to payoff. I had to get a home equity loan to pay my taxes last year.

I'd like to say I'm handling the stress well but I don't think I am. I find myself resentful and envious of people who may huge money who never went to college or went to a trade school for a couple of years, or got a real estate license. I also am frustrated by housing in Florida where I moved to 4 yrs ago. I moved back to Florida from Atlanta 4 yrs ago, and only 3-4 months after moving and trying to sell my Atlanta home, the real estate in Florida exploded. New homes are more than double  there original price. Property is ridiculous. Lots that were $25,000 4 years ago, are now over $100,000.

Its tough working yourself so hard to live paycheck to paycheck. I feel like I'm not providing for my family. More than anything, I get frustrated at feeling sorry for myself. I look at the hours I put in at work and what is left after bills to show for it, then I see some show like "My Super Sweet 16" and see some little 16 y/o diva pouting for a $85,000 car, on top of her $100,000 birthday party.

When do things get better?

I hope it gets better!!! I am a single mother and living from pay check to paycheck... it's incredibly frustrating.  I just recently left the dead beat dad (even when we were together it was only my income anyways...)  I have a student loan... I make maybe $1200/month, my rent is $700 other accumulated debts (all have gone to collection agencies) at least $2000; tv, electricity, tv, food and phone together at least $400/month and don't forget the dreaded babysitter $600/month.  So I'm not even breaking even!!!!  It's killing me... what I do is one month I have to skimp on rent to buy food... next pay I skimp on babysitter to pay electricity and that is my continuing cycle.   But i've held out hope... and I think I see a light at the end of the tunnel...  So don't give up hope.... things have to get better!!!

your situatino sounds alot like mine.  I think overall... a lot of men just don't want responsibilities.  I just left a man after 5 years and having one daughter with him... he is a drug addict, so money was definitely an issue.  It got so bad that I was starving myself to save the food for our little girl.  Now it's not that bad... but he still hasn't found a job either... he's sought some help for his addiction but that doesn't buy food or pay the babysitter.  Sometimes I feel like all i'm working for our apartment and the babysitter because each pay check is spent mostly on those two.  But... I am going to live with my mother.  I'm biting the bullet and at the age of 26 i am moving back in with mommy dearest!  BUT... the rent is less than half of what i'm paying now, so i'm hoping to clear up my debt and finally be able to buy my little girl a beautiful outfit... or a new toy... or some candy even!!!!

You are obviously thinking of moving.... If that is what you feel you need to do.. .then do it!!! kids are very adaptable, even if they are teens.  A change might be good for all of you.  That is what I did, and I feel relieved.  I don't make a lot of money, but I just keep telling myself "I can do this!"  I will work as hard as possible to provide for my child... and i feel like i've got the world on a string!

Good luck to you! 

KBISES......well I agree with you about Credit Card Companies being predators with college students!! They pay Colleges a lot of money to allow them to "hawk" their product on campus. What a bunch of snakes!! However, you should have been smart enough not to get "sucked in" on their offer.

MY ADVICE.......It seems to me that you really do not have a PLAN....and by that I mean a basic household "Budget" that you and your wife have discussed....agreed on....and put into action. Please do that and develop a plan to pay off those Credit Cards......starting with the one with the lowest balance. Pay the minimum payment on all but that one, then pay as much as your budget allows on the lowest balance card. When you get that Card paid off....go out to dinner with your wife....just give yourself a small reward for your success. Then...back to business....take the money you were paying on that card.....add it to the minimum payment you were paying on the next lowest balance card....and begin to attack that one....and so on and so on. PLEASE.....do not start with the highest interest rate Credit Card.....some will advise you to do that.....believe me....it doesn't work as well as the method I gave you....unless....that is also the Card with the lowest balance. During your attack on Credit Cards.....pay only minimum payments on the student loans.

YOUR HOUSE.....in Atlanta should have sold by now. Something sounds "wrong" to me. Are you upside down in the home?? There is only one thing (basically) that keeps a home from selling and that is PRICE!!! If it is priced right....it WILL sell. Do you have it rented?? Many times a renter will not cooperate with a Realtor in showing the home or they have the home in a total "mess" when it is shown. Something is WRONG....and you need to find out what it is. Two mortgage payments will "bleed" anyone dry.

FLORIDA......prices did skyrocket but in 2005 the bubble busted and prices are now going down. I live in the Tampa area and if you are looking for a good value....look at Condos. They can't give them away in this area!! There are some really upscale Condos going for very reasonable prices. Buyer Beware.....never impulse buy.....check out how much the Association Dues are....the Insurance......and the Property Taxes. Avoid any Community with CDD fees.

Sounds like you are earning a descent wage.....you just need to "buckle down" and pay attention to where your money is going. Yea....you may eat "Mack & Cheese" for a year or so but just imagine how well you could live if you were DEBT FREE........GOOD LUCK!!!