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Topic : Living on One Income

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Created on : Thursday, July 07, 2005, 09:21:37 am
Author : dataimport
Whether you're a stay-at-home mom, single, separated or unemployed, living on one income can be quite a challenge. Share your tips and advice with others trying to make ends meet.

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donna1979
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March 28, 2006, 9:17 pm PST

Living on One Income

Quote From: tracey05

My husband and I were both in the service when we met.  We have managed with one income since the birth of our daughter.  Shortly thereafter, we had a boy.  And one more the following year  - yes, 3 little ones in less than 2.5 yrs. 

His being steadily employed, combined with medical benefits, housing and various monetary entitlements, has given us the ability to maintain adequately, but not without strict adherence to wise budgeting. Contrary to popular belief, Military life isn't as easy as it seems.  I have always been very particular about money management, especially bills.  I was taught one way - on time and in full.    

 

On several occasions, we've had to relocate and (base) housing isn't always readily available.  Waiting lists could be from a year to eighteen months - sometimes longer.  Living on the economy, long separations and various obligations of the servicemember often make for difficult and most challenging obstacles. 

 

My husband and I do better if we maintain separate bank accounts.  We started off with a single joint account and it didn't work out - during his absence, we weren't always able to freely communicate and occasionally his purchases or withdrawals couldn't be accounted for.  He allots adequate funds for me to manage household costs while he is able to sufficiently maintain his personal needs in his own.  He pays overhead (rent) and groceries and I pay the rest: phone, cable, insurance, dental, auto, water, electric.  Miscellaneous stuff - gas for the cars, movies, dog food and lunch money is balanced fairly between us as needed.  Works well.  If affordable, occasionally, husband and I 'reward' ourselves to a dinner date without the kids.  Like a personal payoff for our hard work and countless sacrafices. 

 

Most importantly, we live within our means.  Our 'vacations' are usually PCS moves - lenghty road-trips.  During the past 14 years, we've made temporary residence in Virginia, Colorado, Massachusetts, New York and Texas.  We're not flashy or competetive - our mindset doesn't dictate the "keep up with the Jones'" lifestyle.  Our priority - the children and their needs first.  Braces and glasses aren't "free", just the exam.  Fortunately, I am able to remain at home.  After being a SAHM for so many years it has truly become my comfort zone.  Even though the kids are grown, I can't dismiss the feeling  that they still need  me (yup - typical old-fashioned values)  As a homemaker, and somewhat of a busy-body, there is plenty to do and I utilize my time tending our home.  Strangely, I love to clean.  Always neat, tidy and organized.  It  has a calming effect on me.  Indeed, annoying to some (though I'll never understand how or why...), but essential to my well being.  

 

Albert Einstien said I believe that a simple and unassuming manner of life is best for everyone, best both for the body and the mind    

 

I agree :) 

 


 

 

I had to laugh to myself when I read this.  I understand COMPLETLY!!  We are also military...though not mil-mil.   I totally get the "vacation" being the PCS.  We PCS'D from England last year back stateside, with a 9.5 month old daughter.  Don't you love how people think we get "free stuff"?  I wish!:)   

  

Donna 
 
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cheereyes
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March 29, 2006, 7:20 am PST

not working, going to college

I am adding yet another expense to our one-income family, college.  I will be starting college this fall and I am currently home with our two young children ages three and two.  I don't know how we are going to be able to afford it but without my college degree I'll never be able to add to our family income!  What a catch-22!!!  It isn't paying for school that I am worried about, it is the daycare for my children.  We barely make ends meet as it is and I have been looking for more and more ways to save money.  I am going to get rid of our cable TV, switch to dial-up internet, change our cell phone calling plan and probably get a part time job.  I will also have to put my husband on a budget since he is an impulse buyer but I know that our struggles will pay off in the end.  I suggest using coupons and buying generic whenever you can and really ask yourself if you NEED to buy that item or if you just WANT to buy it.  Wait one week before you buy anything on impulse and after that week is over you will find you probably have changed your mind.  Just be real and really cheap:)
 
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mallow2004
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March 29, 2006, 8:35 am PST

Living on One Income

Well, I'm just writing again.  I thought I had it tough.  I feel bad for all those people out there who are having so much trouble.  I'm not exactly in the black since I am on public assistance but my family definitely helps me a lot.  I guess I should be thankful for what I do have.  I am going back to college and I've learned that when you're on public assistance, the government definitely makes it easier to go.  I couldn't believe how easy it was to get grants and fee waivers.  I know when I was working and going to school and trying to get all those things it was much harder. 
 
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wow_fan
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March 29, 2006, 12:20 pm PST

My advice

My husband and I live on one income.

The best advice I can give is to budget. We use Excel and kept track of our expenses for a month or two, entering everything we spent. From this we could see where extra money we could cut was. We also could set an amount for needful things such as groceries and gas. We set our bills also as an estimate from our past bills, always estimate them a little high, and then fill in the exact amount when the bill arrives. We use online banking and payment alot which helps to keep track. We place scheduled appts like doctor and dentist on the budget each payday. Things like present for birthdays or holiday expenses. It helps a huge amount.

I always make a list for groceries, leaving some meals open to grab what is on sale. While I go through the store I mark off an item and write beside it the cost (rounded up to the nearest dollar to help cover tax). I can usually pull some extra cash from the allotted grocery money by keeping track as I go through the store. Plus, I can tell before checkout if I can pick up something extra, like flowers for example.
 
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blndpony16

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March 29, 2006, 12:35 pm PST

Going at it alone

  

 I have been single now for 5 yrs. Never really had a career where I made good money. 

Have gotten myself out of an abusive relationship. I have had the misfortune of losing two jobs in the past  yr. The new job (FT) is paying less the the last one, and I feel like I am never going to get my head above water. I am lucky enough to have another PT job.  A chance to work in the photography field. So, I do feel very blessed to finally get the chance to do something I love. Have my bills with a Debit Manager, drive a 92 Cadillac, (No car pymnts) and things still seem to come and hit me. Have learned some valuable lessons along the way.   

I take care of myself. Money is very tight now.. Gas prices, and food prices do not help.  

I do not  have cable, telephone,and also live in a small town. I have learned to do with out things that aren't important. There is no frills for me.   

The way I see it .. if you want to make it, no matter how hard things hit you.. you can survive, if you keep believing in yourself.. Ask for help if you need it. Get out there.. get two.. maybe even three jobs if that is what it takes.. smile.. feel blessed and offer your heart to others.  

Be patience.. Read a good Book.. :) 

  
 
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connornkat
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March 29, 2006, 2:52 pm PST

Being a stay at home Mom

Quote From: sbruin98

My problem is that my husband and I are both successful in our fields and I NEVER thought that I would want to be a stay at home mom EVER.  However, after having the second in 2 years, I am really struggling with guilt at not being at home, the stress level of juggling a high-stress job that is commission only with managing the house.  And while my husband is GREAT, we have very little time together because EVERY weekend is spent doing chores that cannot be done during the week nights.   My husband just received a large raise that would more than keep us comfortable on 1 income, but where I was excited because I thought it would make the decision easier for me to stay at home, he sees it as a great opportunity to make more money.  We have no debts other than our house, and we have plenty of savings, so it is not as if we would suffer a lifestyle change going to one income, I am just worried that he won't support the decision and wonder where this new attitude has come from (since he married a work-aholic). 

Any advice on how to word my desire to stay at home without it sounding like I want to take the "easy-way-out" ? (I am thinking from a male perspective there) 

  

Thanks!  (sorry for such a long rant - this is my first post) 

Corrie 

HI! 

  

I have been on both sides of this issue. I was a professional full-time (divorced) mother, who worked outside the home when my first born was 2, he is now 17. He was the first kid in daycare in the morning and the last to leave. GUILT.  rush, rush, rush to and from work, rush,rush,rush to get homework, house work, & laundry done. You feel guilty if you need to take time away from your work to take care of doctors,tutors and sports GUILT (don't have alot of time)...rush.  If your kids could experience a mother who is absent of these external pressures they, (and you) will be happier and less stressed-out! Been there done that. Now I am a mother of two little toddlers, and I have been lucky to have stayed home for them. We have built a bond of love, trust, and have a routine.  I won't say I don't have stress, but most of that is self-impose stress. Your argument for staying home:  "My kids deserve it".  
 
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icecat
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March 29, 2006, 3:36 pm PST

Living on One Income

 

I couldn’t believe my eyes with the show tonight; people who are having an income of 7.000$ a month and they had 200.000$ debts!!! 

I find it sad….I’m a single mam, I’ve worked for 15 years, all the money went to raise my son. 

Now, he’s living with his girlfriend, they are very happy together and the first child is on it’s way (yep, I’ll be a grandmother by the end of the year) 

So, I’ll always had to manage on my own, even now that I’m without a job for several years, it’s not only with you people in the US the unemployment is bad, even here in Europe also. (and it has nothing to do with education, I have several degrees, but my age: the companies has to pay me much more then a younger person) 

Lucky for me there is aid from the government, however it’s just enough to pay bills,  nothing for ‘fun’ 

If I then see how people live and buy lots of things they don’t need but they just want to ‘have’, I’m thinking: what’s wrong with them? 

They should stop and think for a moment what they are doing! Many people struggle every day to survive, to get food on the table for their children, maybe even in their own neighbourhood…they should help each other instead of buying 5 cars (you can only drive one at the time, right??)  

  

I would like to say also that since Dr.Phil’s show has been broadcast here there are many people who watch it; he gives really good advice and in such diplomatic way. 

  

I also believe that everything that happens, happens for a reason (to learn) so there are some issues I have to resolve on my own (like everyone) in order to receive the abundance which there is for every human on this planet. We all learn from the things we have to go through although we see it often only when we look back at it, that they were valuable lessons. 

Dr.Phil found his task, what he came to do here, that’s why he is so very successful in what he does.

 

We all have to find what we are suppose to do in this lifetime, for the good of all people, that's the secret of succes and happiness. 


 
 
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hokiegrl
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March 29, 2006, 4:07 pm PST

Living on One Income

Quote From: sbruin98

My problem is that my husband and I are both successful in our fields and I NEVER thought that I would want to be a stay at home mom EVER.  However, after having the second in 2 years, I am really struggling with guilt at not being at home, the stress level of juggling a high-stress job that is commission only with managing the house.  And while my husband is GREAT, we have very little time together because EVERY weekend is spent doing chores that cannot be done during the week nights.   My husband just received a large raise that would more than keep us comfortable on 1 income, but where I was excited because I thought it would make the decision easier for me to stay at home, he sees it as a great opportunity to make more money.  We have no debts other than our house, and we have plenty of savings, so it is not as if we would suffer a lifestyle change going to one income, I am just worried that he won't support the decision and wonder where this new attitude has come from (since he married a work-aholic). 

Any advice on how to word my desire to stay at home without it sounding like I want to take the "easy-way-out" ? (I am thinking from a male perspective there) 

  

Thanks!  (sorry for such a long rant - this is my first post) 

Corrie 

I for one can tell you that being a stay at home mom is not taking the easy way out, as for how to tell you husband tell him what you told all of us.  That you want to be with the kids and that you want more time for him b/c you feel like you dont get enough time with him as it is...and who knows maybe in a few years when the kids are in school or in preschool a few days a week you will go back to work.  You might be surprised to find that you husband thinks its a great idea....my husband was the one who approached me to stay at home...and I was really trying to find a way for us to do it..so we are now on a tight budget and I manage there is plenty to do without spending money and keeping the kids entertained and happy is my priority these days. And have you thought about part-time if your job allows for it? That could be the compromise that you both are looking for! Good Luck!
 
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connornkat
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March 29, 2006, 5:18 pm PST

oh yes, I forgot to say.....

Quote From: jeepgirl85

Corrie, if you are afraid he'll think it's easy I will gladly send him e-mails describing the life of a stay at home mom with 2 kids in 2 years. When he reads about the baby that threw up EVERY ounce of formula you gave him, and the other one that while you were cleaning up the baby (and yourself and your new shirt )decided it would be a good time to try to put a knife in the electric socket, and when you scream he throws the knife, and proceedes ro run right into the the door frame, bruising his head and biting his lip. So, in the span on 15 minutes you are covered in vomited formula, a soaked through diaper, water from the ice for the older ones head, and blood from his mouth. And this isn't even one of the bad days. It is NOT an easy job. lol. It is the best job ever, but not an easy one. I really hope you can work out staying at home, I don't think I could work unless completely necessary. I'd miss to many firsts. And, feel like I am the one who needs to be around to clean up the blood and kiss the bruises. Good luck to you. P.S. i am serious about the e-mails. :)
I had 2 kids within a 14 month period of time, and I stayed home from day one with them. I have several "Calgon moments", I like to call them. You never get a moment to yourself, unless you can sinchronize nap time. Sometimes I will have a thought for a fleeting second, then totally loose it. I was at the park the other day swinging my almost 3 year old and told a mother next to us that she will be turning 2 in May. I said "oh, she is at the top of the charts for her age"---in response to her eyes bugging out of her head. DUH! It is called Mommy brain-drain and it does happan to the most educated amoung us. Fortunately the other Mom related to me and said she has forgotten her vocabulary and will forget words mid-sentence.  We shared a laugh. It is because "the job" is so demanding that it consumes you, and there is no down-time. That is my excuse anyway. haha Sometimes, if your shower is delayed due to some type of "situation" lol, you can forget it, until hubby or (second shift) :) comes in. So, easy job? NO!!!! It is the most selfless, self-sacraficing job you can do, and grossly underpaid. But the dividends pay off enormously. You become a super negotiator, problem solver, more organized, and fine tune your listening skills. Plus, you can apply diplomacy and tactful principes every day that are great for business communications too! I used to pride myself with my multi-tasking skills at work. Come to find out, it was nothing compared to now. But,I love it.
 
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michaelnroxy
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March 29, 2006, 6:36 pm PST

There is Hope!

Living on one income is like living on your own planet.  

All the bills and expenses are yours and no one else to blame, but yourself in a very judgemental way.  

  

It is not hard, in a perfect world. When you make financial mistakes, tragedy strikes, and all the odds are stacked against you in more ways than one ... then it is a financial disaster.   

  

Living on one income is not fun, take it from me, unless your one income allows you to live comfortably? 

  

Thank God, I have my career and financial future in line ... FINALLY! 

  

  
 
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