Topic : 10/12 Homecoming Shooting

As the principal of a middle school in a suburb of New York City, it was frustrating watching today's show.  In our district we are lucky enough to have many resources to help students in crisis.  We often are able to identify students who are going down a dangerous path, and do our best to connect with each and every student in our school.  The problem is, we rarely get support from the parents of these students.  I personally was called a liar by the parents of two students who sold knives in my school.  In fact, I had to file a police report against one of them who threatened me.  The following year, both boys were involved in a car theft resulting in a car accident. The parents finally came to accept their students were at risk, but a precious year of intervention and help was lost. 

There are so many students in pain in my school.  We make continued attempts to get them help, but often the parents turn things around and blame the school.  When I tried to get one parent to let us do a Child Study Team evaluation of his son, he said the only reason we wanted to do it was so if his son did something bad we couldn't be sued.  He refused to sign off on the evaluation, and his son remains in, I believe, considerable social/emotional pain.  We are doing our best to help him, but certain services are denied to him without the CST evaluation.

Another student came to me and broke down because her mother had a drinking problem and had passed out in front of her and her two sisters several times.  This student had bonded with one of our teachers, who tried to give her emotional support.  The father became enraged when he found out this teacher knew about his wife's issues, and threatened to sue the school if the teacher had any further contact with his daughter.  So, one of the only people who was there for this poor student was denied to her.

Dr. Phil, I don't know the answer.  But I do know that, more and more, schools are held accountable and blamed for problems that are not in our control. The kids need us so desperately, but how much can we take before it becomes too much?  It's time for families to be held more accountable for the mental health of their children.  I don't know how that can be accomplished, but I see that as a necessary step for a true partnership to be formed between the home and school that will result in getting these kids the interventions they need before things go horribly wrong.

I have worked in the public schools for 29 years and have worked with Special Educaiton students throughout me years. Some students identified as Emotionally Disturbed (ED) are considered high risk for future problems and I often hear teachers make comments like "that could be one of the students that comes in and starts shooting up the school". These students are however, given special rights and priviledges when they have discipine problems that could warrant long term suspension.  The ED student is not allowed to be suspended long term if their disability (emotional disturbance) caused them to do what ever they might have done to warrant suspension.   They can remain in school and are not allowed to be considered for suspension whereas the "normal" student is held accountable and can be suspended long term.  This often creates hostility and resentment among teachers, administrators, students and parents.  We can't protect the "normal" student anymore because the Special Education students don't have to accept responsibility for their behavior.

I have lived all over the country and have encountered censorship in each state I have lived in

When I lived in the South if the local network did not care for the subject matter they merely had a blank screen.  This censorship would range from something sexual (t.v. sexual that is) learning about, in context with a story, etc. and of course all the political and some religion issues.

For the past 4 years I have encountered POLITICAL censorship a number of times.  I took to watching BBC News on Public Television about 3 years ago in order to find out what was happening in the WORLD.  How much news of the WORLD does one get on the network news. Practically NADA. Not only do we not know what is going on in the world, we do not get to see a number of things. 

When was the last time a Network covered any kind of demonstration against anything? When was the last time a Network showed anyone picking at the White house?  When was the last time a Network showed film of our brave and dedicated troops fighting and dying to show how IT REALLY IS in Iraq.

We got to watch the Vietnam War with all its gore every night at dinnertime in the 60's and70's. We understtod just what was happening in that horrible bloodbath. Iraq is no different, so why no true coverage?

Aren't we allowed anymore in this country to see the truth. Where is CRONKITE when we need him? They got rid of RATHER and others of the truth genre so who's left? KATIE I don't think so as her first report on her first day was how great the oil companies are to do alll theat offshore drilling. WHat a dissapointment.

The News Reports from Iraq show a correspondent reporting from a night backdrop of Baghdad speaking about what Bush or the latest Generals had to say.

Braver correspondents have been Wounded and Killed in Action  and I respect that.  Don't let their reporting and sacrifice go to waste.

Anyway back to Censorship.  Watch the BBC for one week to find out what the story is.  BEWARE even Public Television is Censored.  If the Brits say something or show something not to cool it is indeed blocked out.  I am not talking about not being a patriot, I am talking about the right to know EVERYTHING

PAY ATTENTION TO WHEN THE SCREEN   GOES BLACK OR FUZZY OR THE SOUND GOES on any channel.  You will soon find that we are all not allowed to see the truth

Ever wonder why the shootings are happening in our schools? What's going on in our schools? It's a complex problem we are struggling with right now over our 10 year old son. The No Child Left Behind Act is being taken out of context. It was intended to insure all kids were working at or above grade level and if they were not, that they would get the supports needed to succeed. But instead, it is being used as a tool to keep shuffling kids on to the next grade even if they haven't mastered the skills of the grade they were last in. Our son is diagnosed Bipolar and  Asperger Syndrome. Because we have been able to improve his behavior, the school says he has no problems. Mainstreaming every child is a monumental mistake, especially with emotionally fragile kids. "Normal" doesn't rub off onto children with mental illness. Being put in a position where they can't keep up year after year creates a deficit in learning and becomes emotionally taxing on the child. We have been at odds with the school for over a year. We have had 5 meetings and been to the school board so far this year. The school wants to deny that our son is struggling even though he spent 11 days in a mental ward last year because of school stress. This year, if something is not done, he is heading in the same direction. They are doing our son a disservice keeping him in mainstream classes. He feels inferior and different. He wants to do well, but he can't. The pressure is mounting and they don't see it. The problem may be in part due to funding. There's not a lot of money for kids like our son. Federal dollars have to be matched dollar for dollar by the local district. So, it's no surprise that they want to keep the dollars in regular education classrooms where it will benifit all the kids. But our son is getting lost in the shuffle. Right now, for the most part, our son is not violent. He has been known to shove a child to get what he wants, so that is a problem we're working on. Our son has a lot of difficulties. He does not fit in. He doesn't reason things out like other children. He lives in a literal world. He can only guage his life by the things he knows. He cannot predict outcomes. His mind is also unstable at times due to depression and mania. He has problems with halucinations and delusion. The school has been made aware of all of this. But they minimize what we tell them or dismiss it entirely. I am concerned for his future because of it.  I'm not saying that our son will be a school shooter, but I am saying that I can see where denying that these kids have problems and using the 'least restrictive environment' rule to keep them in reg. ed. classes is causing them harm. Could it grow into the problems we're seeing? I say yes. Can we do anything to stop it? I'm not sure. It's a sad thing for us all.

My opinion is that somehow these type of people have never felt accepted into society or early groups of peers for whatever the reason-often being behaviours that they should have had help with.Society waits far too long to help these children,usually when it is too late and the pattern is firmly set.Much,much earlier treatment would be a bonus.Noone places any focus on the parenting,all eyes are on the child's behaviours.Often today rules and respect are things of the past.If you have a happy child they are not likely to become social mifits.It angers me to see all that has happened placed on the child,how did he/she get to that stage?

Also,structure is not good in families today,firmness and kindness go a long way.

Hello-

I realize that sometimes bad things happen to good people, but come on!  There have to be some clues here!  Are we really looking at the right suspects?  It seems to me that the kids expressing anger are not the likely candidates for this kind of violence.  I would think that the kids we need to be concerned about are the "invisible" kids.  These kids carry a lot of pain inside them that is not released.  Many times these kids are bullied and made fun of. 

How many times have we listened to post-event interviews when other kids and teachers are really surprised that this particular kid would do such a thing?   I appreciate that Dr. Phil was trying to get out of guests on his show a particular profile that we can keep a watch.   I don't feel he was getting very many straight answers, probably because there are so many opinions.

Gun control is NOT the answer.  Do you really think that kids obtain AK-47's legally?  Of course not!  So tell me how gun control would take care of that!  The only ones it would affect are the people already abiding by the law!  When kids get to the point of this kind of rage and violence, they mean business and they don't except to come out alive!  Groups are not uncommon because they need the validation from each other.

Everyone is entitled to his/her opinion, and many times we have to agree to disagree.  As long as we keep focused on the common goal, i.e. violence control in our schools, good ideas can emerge.  Sometimes we need to put everything in God's Hands, and He will show us the way!

Let me know what you think. 

Dr. Phil - Love your show! 

Denise Dick

Springfield, MO