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Topic : Career Goals

Number of Replies: 360
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Thursday, July 07, 2005, 09:24:24 am
Author : dataimport
Are you stuck in a dead-end job, or do you feel you are on the career path of your dreams? Talk about how to set - and achieve - your goals!

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July 10, 2007, 9:29 am CDT

Should I share lead vocals with a male counterpart?

Hi, I am a singer as a hobby and I am looking to reform a successful group that I had in a major city back in the 90's. I have since relocated back to this major city and even hooked-up with one of my old band mates. The problem is all I do is sing and in my former project (in the 90's), I was the only lead singer.

 

My old bass player had a readily available drummer and guitar player to finish the band out. The problem is the drummer wants to also do some lead vocals. Should I allow this drummer to also sing some lead tunes? I guess I will just sit out whenever he is performing, but a part of me wants to do all of the songs (since I do not play another instrument), but I'm afraid if I go this route, the drummer will not want to play with me at all!

 

Would ya'll rather see a female band sharing the vocals or doing all 40 songs per show by herself, vocally?

 

Also, why can I not share the vocals without it being a problem?? I feel like I have to share the vocals simply because I am a woman. What do ya'll think?  Thank you!!!

 
July 10, 2007, 4:23 pm CDT

Hi

Quote From: lucky35

Hi, I am a singer as a hobby and I am looking to reform a successful group that I had in a major city back in the 90's. I have since relocated back to this major city and even hooked-up with one of my old band mates. The problem is all I do is sing and in my former project (in the 90's), I was the only lead singer.

 

My old bass player had a readily available drummer and guitar player to finish the band out. The problem is the drummer wants to also do some lead vocals. Should I allow this drummer to also sing some lead tunes? I guess I will just sit out whenever he is performing, but a part of me wants to do all of the songs (since I do not play another instrument), but I'm afraid if I go this route, the drummer will not want to play with me at all!

 

Would ya'll rather see a female band sharing the vocals or doing all 40 songs per show by herself, vocally?

 

Also, why can I not share the vocals without it being a problem?? I feel like I have to share the vocals simply because I am a woman. What do ya'll think?  Thank you!!!

I used to be in similar situations many years ago and this is how I handled it.

I say share the vocals and the songs as not to have conflicting egos and all. It also gives the band some variety and no ill feelings between the singers. You are going to maybe have to learn and sing harmony with this drummer.

When the drummer is singing you can like I used to do play some other simple type of

percussion instruments like tamborine, bell etc. I cant think of the name of some of those

small cheese grater type small percussion instruments. Its been too long for me.

Oh; Another thing you can play would be morrocos. Boy am I rusty.

If all else fails you can always sit out when the drummer is singing and take a break but

announce you are taking a break and give him the stage.

Take Care

 
July 11, 2007, 9:56 am CDT

Wow! Good Advice!

Quote From: marsplasti

I used to be in similar situations many years ago and this is how I handled it.

I say share the vocals and the songs as not to have conflicting egos and all. It also gives the band some variety and no ill feelings between the singers. You are going to maybe have to learn and sing harmony with this drummer.

When the drummer is singing you can like I used to do play some other simple type of

percussion instruments like tamborine, bell etc. I cant think of the name of some of those

small cheese grater type small percussion instruments. Its been too long for me.

Oh; Another thing you can play would be morrocos. Boy am I rusty.

If all else fails you can always sit out when the drummer is singing and take a break but

announce you are taking a break and give him the stage.

Take Care

Thanks for your help. It was really good advice.
 
July 11, 2007, 2:27 pm CDT

Career Goals

Quote From: renagade

I see you as two people.  Either a complainer or someone's that scared and then someone who takes the bull by the horns and does something to be shot down because of rules and regs.  Welcome to the real world. 

  

You say you werent given the tools to be successful - Wrong!!!  When I got my degree were the words 'you have been given a bag of tools and some building blocks, the rest is up to you'.  Did you expect to be given a 'guided' tour of everything.   

  

I cannot believe you don't know what to do, because I know what I would do. 

Jerk...........did you even read what I wrote???    So tell me, what would YOU do.......I want to know!!!    That is why I wrote the message to begin with!!!  duh!!!!
 
July 12, 2007, 2:32 pm CDT

Figuring out career goals and aspirations:

29 year old male with degrees in Forestry and Mechanical Engineering.

Since leaving school and starting to work, I have suffled from job to job.  Seems I just can't find the passion for what I am doing....I haven't enjoyed work, or found it rewarding other than monetarily.

So I will ask.  How do you know if your career choice is right?  Many say that you should just know, or that if you think of what you want to be your path will become clear.  I'll tell you, I have tried for years, I am not clear on where or what I want to be.  I find it depressing, and am unmotivated because I feel I am just towing the line and taking jobs I am skilled for but will end up being more of the junk which I just left.

How do I figure out where I should be.....I am tired of working for money alone.  I need passion, motivation, feel like I am doing what I choose, and being a success because I am doing what I was meant and want to do with my life.
 
July 12, 2007, 8:55 pm CDT

Career goal reply

Quote From: rdking1977

29 year old male with degrees in Forestry and Mechanical Engineering.

Since leaving school and starting to work, I have suffled from job to job.  Seems I just can't find the passion for what I am doing....I haven't enjoyed work, or found it rewarding other than monetarily.

So I will ask.  How do you know if your career choice is right?  Many say that you should just know, or that if you think of what you want to be your path will become clear.  I'll tell you, I have tried for years, I am not clear on where or what I want to be.  I find it depressing, and am unmotivated because I feel I am just towing the line and taking jobs I am skilled for but will end up being more of the junk which I just left.

How do I figure out where I should be.....I am tired of working for money alone.  I need passion, motivation, feel like I am doing what I choose, and being a success because I am doing what I was meant and want to do with my life.

I am so sorry to hear about your situation.  Let me ask, are you happy with your life outside of work?  What do you enjoy doing?  Do you like to work with people?  I would seek an employment agency and take an employment aptitude test.  Maybe you need to work in a totally different direction.

 

I too had a career goal in mind upon graduating from high school.  I wanted to be a band director.  After all, I had worked giving private lessons in a local music studio and I had substituted for the high school music teacher while in high school.  I had won many awards.

 

Then my direction in life changed.  I got married and  worked my husband through his last two years of college.  I became a secretary in an Ivy League office.  Well... I knew what I didn't want to do the rest of my life.

 

Finally it was my turn to finish college.  Due to arthritis, I could no longer become a band director.  I didn't have the physical ability to continue to pursue that dream.  My lifelong dream was gone.  Then I discovered the world of teaching special needs students.  I have now taught in this field for 32 years and I could never be happier!  I love the children, their eagerness to learn, and the gratitude of their parents.  Yes, I still have health issues, but who better would understand my difficult days than my students?

 

Good luck in your pursuit of happiness.

 
July 13, 2007, 12:44 pm CDT

I totally understand.

Quote From: flute68

I am so sorry to hear about your situation.  Let me ask, are you happy with your life outside of work?  What do you enjoy doing?  Do you like to work with people?  I would seek an employment agency and take an employment aptitude test.  Maybe you need to work in a totally different direction.

 

I too had a career goal in mind upon graduating from high school.  I wanted to be a band director.  After all, I had worked giving private lessons in a local music studio and I had substituted for the high school music teacher while in high school.  I had won many awards.

 

Then my direction in life changed.  I got married and  worked my husband through his last two years of college.  I became a secretary in an Ivy League office.  Well... I knew what I didn't want to do the rest of my life.

 

Finally it was my turn to finish college.  Due to arthritis, I could no longer become a band director.  I didn't have the physical ability to continue to pursue that dream.  My lifelong dream was gone.  Then I discovered the world of teaching special needs students.  I have now taught in this field for 32 years and I could never be happier!  I love the children, their eagerness to learn, and the gratitude of their parents.  Yes, I still have health issues, but who better would understand my difficult days than my students?

 

Good luck in your pursuit of happiness.

I totally understand how you feel. I have a Masters degree and a Bachelors degree in Business and I have a terrible job history. I used to work as a dancer, so I got really used to always having money or access to quick cash. Now, I have been trying to put my life in order and work in the real world, but it is difficult. I am once again living off of unemployment and job hunting. It is embarrassing because I run into certain people and they will say, "have you found a job, yet?". I am now looking into teaching opportunities. I hope this will create the passion I need to stay motivated. As crazy as it sounds, I really enjoyed "dancin'", but it is a dead end, secretive type of job and I am really too old and educated to ever do it again. I wish you all the best, but just know that there is someone out there who is educated and has job problems, too. I wish you all the best!
 
July 17, 2007, 8:45 am CDT

Juggling friends in the workplace

how do you juggle between a friend who is also your superior and who sometimes abuses their power when you rely on them to deliver something for you?
 
July 30, 2007, 1:10 pm CDT

Am I hopeless?

I've been trying to find a job, it seems, ever since I graduated from college in May of 2005.  So far, I haven't found much, just temporary jobs that only ended up lasting about a month and had nothing to do with my degree, which was in music and media communications.  I want to be a songwriter, eventually, but in the meantime, I need a day job to pay the bills and put food on the table.

 

I am a very intelligent, capable person, but I am not resilient when it comes to rejection.  My school had no job placement program, and I keep trying to motivate myself to put in more applications and keep looking - I'm in a desperate place financially and my money troubles keep me stressed to the point of paralysis.  I have no income, no credit, and thousands in debt.  I haven't been able to pay one single bill in over a year.  My clothes are wearing out, and I fear I will not be able to find a job just because of my wardrobe.  I can't possibly afford anything other than the basics for keeping myself alive.  (And sometimes not even those.)

 

I have dreams.  I have talent.  I'm willing to put those aside for now and work at McDonald's, but I can't seem to get a job at even the lowest levels.  I struggle with an eating disorder that I can't possibly afford to treat, which keeps me even more paralyzed.  The more I fail, the more I struggle, and the more I struggle, the more I fail.  I've tried to "think my way to success," but sometimes I can't manufacture one positive thought, no matter how hard I try.  I'm so scared of living a meaningless life.  I'm so tired of being nothing but a burden to my family.  I know I would not take a job for granted, if given the chance, no matter how much I hated it.  I feel like I'm supposed to do something important with my life, that I've been given a rare gift and a purpose.  I know what I'm meant to do with my life - and I know I'm failing grandly - and it's killing me!

 

But for now I'd just like a quarter to put in the Wal-Mart soda machine.  A quarter I wouldn't panic over spending.  I want the privilege of working for a paycheck, of not being the one pushed aside because I'm in everyone else's way.  I want to carry my own weight for once.  I just want a chance!

 

Why won't anyone hire me?  Am I that stupid?  (But I know I'm not stupid.)  Am I that repulsive?  Am I completely hopeless?

 
August 12, 2007, 6:11 am CDT

Lifestyle slack

Dear all,

 

This is my first post so I am going to make it short and hope that people who don't recognize my name will give it an interesting read and help with their suggestions.

 

I have a problem in that I feel I have become a major slacker, and I hate it! I am NOT a moocher though, I am actually the sole bread-winner of my household (My wife chose to be a stay-at-home mom and take care of the house, which is a darn big job honestly!). But that's just it, i built two companies that now run with barely 5 hours of input time from my side per week. So we're pretty financially comfortable (two exotic cars, 4-bedroom villa, money on the side for kids college and retirement etc.).

 

I know a lot will be saying: "WHAT ARE YOU COMPLAINING ABOUT THEN?!" Well I don't complain or whine, however I was shocked while watching a rerun from Dr. Phil's show where he said that people who are off work (on work comp or something like that) for 12 months have less than 10% chance of getting back into gainful full-time employment, and that they can't get in the busy productive behaviour anymore. And that is just it right now: I have become a slacker for two years doing practically very little. My body is physically exhausted all the time and going down to the grocery store one block up the road to pick up something is such a drag for me that I find myself avoiding it, and then feel like crap when after a while my wife dresses up to pick it up. I look at myself and I see someone who's like a depressed loser in his sweat pants most of the day. I wake up at noon and sleep close to dawn. I try to think of exercise, healthy diet (that helped a bit), or something like that, but I find my big fat butt sticking to the couch like they're in love.

 

It's hard to imagine that at 31 with successful businesses and a loving family and I find myself miserable. I don't have confidence or self-esteem problems though as my wife tells me (and she tells me EVERYTHING straight, God bless her) that I am proud and maybe bordering on cocky sometimes.

 

How do I throw this slacking out of the window, and get back to being a productive active individual? What is the solution to this cycle? If the businesses don't perform well at some point of time and begins going south (which it might considering that now I have become a laid back slacker who won't respond to anything less than a major crisis) I can practically destory my life and family.

 

Yours,

 

Sam

 
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