Topic : Career Goals

Have you ever figured out what you were placed on this planet for ?  We all have a special gift and if we know what it is and give it a try happiness usually comes with it.

What do you think you would like to do ?  Why Information/Library Services ?  Why go back to school for a profession that you loathe ? 

If we had a little more information we might be able to make some worthy suggestions or share some thoughts.

Why Information/Library Services ?  Why go back to school for a profession that you loathe ? 

 I wanted to impress the people I admire and care about.  One person in particular whom I admired suggested I enroll in  Information/Library Services because they believed this was something I could and I trusted their opinion.

Have you ever figured out what you were placed on this planet for ? 

No.  My instinct is to say I'm here to create an impression....and so far that hasn't worked. I certainly hope I'm not here to run for office or lead an army!

My previous work history included working here and there so I could act in theatre/film and as a simulated patient.  In my late thirties I realized I may not marry or have children which is where I would gladly have placed my focus. So, I realized I needed to get into something more sustainable and I enrolled into the Masters of Library and Information Studies.  It seemed a respectable profession. 

I've been trying to find a job, it seems, ever since I graduated from college in May of 2005.  So far, I haven't found much, just temporary jobs that only ended up lasting about a month and had nothing to do with my degree, which was in music and media communications.  I want to be a songwriter, eventually, but in the meantime, I need a day job to pay the bills and put food on the table.

I am a very intelligent, capable person, but I am not resilient when it comes to rejection.  My school had no job placement program, and I keep trying to motivate myself to put in more applications and keep looking - I'm in a desperate place financially and my money troubles keep me stressed to the point of paralysis.  I have no income, no credit, and thousands in debt.  I haven't been able to pay one single bill in over a year.  My clothes are wearing out, and I fear I will not be able to find a job just because of my wardrobe.  I can't possibly afford anything other than the basics for keeping myself alive.  (And sometimes not even those.)

I have dreams.  I have talent.  I'm willing to put those aside for now and work at McDonald's, but I can't seem to get a job at even the lowest levels.  I struggle with an eating disorder that I can't possibly afford to treat, which keeps me even more paralyzed.  The more I fail, the more I struggle, and the more I struggle, the more I fail.  I've tried to "think my way to success," but sometimes I can't manufacture one positive thought, no matter how hard I try.  I'm so scared of living a meaningless life.  I'm so tired of being nothing but a burden to my family.  I know I would not take a job for granted, if given the chance, no matter how much I hated it.  I feel like I'm supposed to do something important with my life, that I've been given a rare gift and a purpose.  I know what I'm meant to do with my life - and I know I'm failing grandly - and it's killing me!

But for now I'd just like a quarter to put in the Wal-Mart soda machine.  A quarter I wouldn't panic over spending.  I want the privilege of working for a paycheck, of not being the one pushed aside because I'm in everyone else's way.  I want to carry my own weight for once.  I just want a chance!

Why won't anyone hire me?  Am I that stupid?  (But I know I'm not stupid.)  Am I that repulsive?  Am I completely hopeless?