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Topic : 10/16 The Dr. Phil House: Man Camp Newlyweds, Part 5

Number of Replies: 49
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Friday, October 12, 2007, 02:51:48 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
As their move-out day draws near, the three couples in Dr. Phil’s marriage retreat finally stop fighting and start getting real about making changes in their lives and marriages. First, the husbands watch their better halves get dolled up and leave for a night on the town. Initially jealous, the men are delighted to learn they’re going to get to spy on their wives. What really happens during ladies night? As they watch the women get approached and hit on by strange men, you won’t believe how the husbands react! Then, an important final exercise causes the men to let their guard down and finally open up to their wives. After seeing their spouse’s softer side, can Danielle, Kim and Karla trust again and move forward? Then, Dr. Phil has his final meeting with the group and imparts his secret for staying happily married. Upon seeing photos of their children, the couples recognize their motivation for a new beginning. And, Dr. Phil’s wife, Robin, joins them to answer questions about strengthening their union from here on out. Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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October 16, 2007, 2:49 pm CDT

John and Karla

Quote From: sherryvt

I am concerned about John and Karla's children with the abuse and alcohol in their home. What will be the follow up to make sure they are okay?
Dr. Phil, you told Karla she was "high" on alcohol and Xanax.  This really confuses me because Xanax is prescribed for panic and anxiety.  Wouldn't  Xanax be considered a sedative, not something that gets you high?
 
October 16, 2007, 3:58 pm CDT

The silent disease (alcoholism)

Quote From: tomaleman

Dr. Phil,

I totally agree with the quote about Karla not doing anything about her alcoholism.  She did not go to rehab and does not go to AA meetings, but she says she "knows the twelve steps" so she's ok.  Dr. Phil..I know that you know this girl is just totally white knucking it and it is only a matter of time before she is drinking again.  I am amazed that no one addressed this in the show.  The follow up show made them appear to be doing so much better.  She is just a time bomb with the flame very close to the fuze.  It's very sad actually.  She said on the followup episode that she was just drinking because she wanted attention.  BS...she drinks because she is an alcoholic who is just temporally dry.  Without help she is probably more miserable than when she was drinking.  I sincerely hope that The Dr. Phil show does something to address this issue or this woman is going to wind up in jail, or an institution, or dead. 

I am so glad to hear that someone is thinking exactly what I was.  It really is only a matter of time until their family implodes once again.  Karla is relying on her husband for her happiness and his anger and rage needs to be diffused in some way, that is where Al-Anon comes in.  It is an amazing program that I can't say enough about.  Those kids deserve better!
 
October 16, 2007, 4:00 pm CDT

How can there be 100% success rate?

Nothing against Dr. Phil or teh Dr. Phil house but all 3 times I have seen people go into the Dr. Phil House they all come out way better people, no matter HOW bad the situation, no matter HOW bad, or HOW big the problems are. It just seems like whoever goes in there comes out a winner. Is that even a reasonable success rate?

 

I mean IF thats the ultimate truth, then all the power to those people and Dr. Phil but I guess I just have a hard time believing that everyone comes out hero's from that place... Some of those couples in the last couple episodes were a big mess but them boom episode # 3? Its like their all going home, and everyone is happier, almost cured? Is that even feisable to assume that can happen....

 

I mean I know Dr. Phil is good.. But hmmm.. If its that good can I come to the Dr. Phil house please! I want to be happy and healthy again! Dr. Phil can you help someone whos not happy and outgoing and productive even after stopping a 10 month problem with pain killers and being over 3 yrs clean now? Not only that but my Ulcerative Colitis is a buggin me and Im just not happy ever? If I go to the Dr. Phil house will I come out there a NEW man? Im only 30 now and want to drive my car into a semi.....

 
October 16, 2007, 4:56 pm CDT

Man Camp

Quote From: munyon

Dr. Phil, you told Karla she was "high" on alcohol and Xanax.  This really confuses me because Xanax is prescribed for panic and anxiety.  Wouldn't  Xanax be considered a sedative, not something that gets you high?

High is just a term for someone that is on drugs and/or alcohol. Like being high on Marijuana even though its a downer.

 
October 16, 2007, 4:59 pm CDT

what happened to rehab

Quote From: philfan908

I am so glad to hear that someone is thinking exactly what I was.  It really is only a matter of time until their family implodes once again.  Karla is relying on her husband for her happiness and his anger and rage needs to be diffused in some way, that is where Al-Anon comes in.  It is an amazing program that I can't say enough about.  Those kids deserve better!
 He grilled the husband about finding the $100,000 for rehab, then gave it to them anyway.  She agreed to go to a real rehab and not a spa rehab.  What happened with all of that??  I agree he needs a program too.  But they are too busy living happily ever after I guess.  My family could sure use some help, if they are not going to take advantage of a gift of a lifetime.
 
October 16, 2007, 5:00 pm CDT

The first man camp

Quote From: shmigelz

Nothing against Dr. Phil or teh Dr. Phil house but all 3 times I have seen people go into the Dr. Phil House they all come out way better people, no matter HOW bad the situation, no matter HOW bad, or HOW big the problems are. It just seems like whoever goes in there comes out a winner. Is that even a reasonable success rate?

 

I mean IF thats the ultimate truth, then all the power to those people and Dr. Phil but I guess I just have a hard time believing that everyone comes out hero's from that place... Some of those couples in the last couple episodes were a big mess but them boom episode # 3? Its like their all going home, and everyone is happier, almost cured? Is that even feisable to assume that can happen....

 

I mean I know Dr. Phil is good.. But hmmm.. If its that good can I come to the Dr. Phil house please! I want to be happy and healthy again! Dr. Phil can you help someone whos not happy and outgoing and productive even after stopping a 10 month problem with pain killers and being over 3 yrs clean now? Not only that but my Ulcerative Colitis is a buggin me and Im just not happy ever? If I go to the Dr. Phil house will I come out there a NEW man? Im only 30 now and want to drive my car into a semi.....

In the first man camp, one of the couples ended it cause nothing changed when they returned home.
 
October 16, 2007, 5:07 pm CDT

no rehab

Quote From: jrtjosey

 He grilled the husband about finding the $100,000 for rehab, then gave it to them anyway.  She agreed to go to a real rehab and not a spa rehab.  What happened with all of that??  I agree he needs a program too.  But they are too busy living happily ever after I guess.  My family could sure use some help, if they are not going to take advantage of a gift of a lifetime.
dr phil only mentioned rehab on that one show, but never offered it again to Karla
 
October 16, 2007, 5:43 pm CDT

Stop w/ the bashing if you haven't watched!

If any of you watched the show last week you would know that Dr. Phil DID offer treatment for Karla and help for her husband with her addictions.  What, do you guys want him to repeat himself every episode?!?  Stop bashing!  If you don't like the series, here's some advice, don't watch!!!  Most of us out there LIKE it and get good information from it!!!  The fact that you guys think it's okay to come on here and think you can out shrink Dr. Phil is astonishing and rather egotistical!

Just let the Dr. do his work and leave him and his family the heck alone!  If he wants to talk about how much he loves his wife and children, then let him!  What gives you all the right to tear someone else down!?!

It's frustrating to watch people berate and say hurtful things about people in the public eye without actually thinking about what it might do to those who hear it, whether its the person you are talking about or their family.  Keep it to yourself!

 
October 16, 2007, 6:50 pm CDT

Good luck to all three couples

I hope that all three couples do well in the future. 

Marriage is full of hills and valleys, but if you can learn to lean on each other in the valleys it makes things so much easier. I have been married to my husband for 30 years and I can honestly say that when I'm in a room with 1,000 other women, I know that I'm the luckiest woman there.  He's just simply the best.  We have had our times of tragedy and trouble, but we seem to have always leaned on each other and loved each other through everything. 

We NEVER called each other names.  When we were newlyweds, we were discussing things that can happen during an arguement.  One of the things was calling each other bad names.  We decided right then to call each other every bad thing we could think of so that if we were in an argument and one of us called the other a bad name, we wouldn't be surprised.  I have to say that we laughed hysterically through the entire thing.  When my husband got to "Bullwinkle nose", the discussion was OVER!  I was laughing too hard to even speak. 

I think that being each other's best friends and laughing ALOT has always helped us.  We never hid things from each other, nor did we throw things back at each other. 

You have all been blessed to have this incredible experience with Dr. Phil and Robin.  I sincerely hope that you will all continue to do well and just get better and better.  I will keep praying for all of you.

Please remember that the most important thing (after the laughter) is that you put each other first above everyone and everything else.  Being there for each other and supporting each other through all situations will bring you home safe every time.

God bless all of you and good luck.
 
October 16, 2007, 7:17 pm CDT

I agree

Quote From: unchained123

Three years ago my children and I could have REALLY used Dr Phil's advice!!!!!  When some of us watch Dr Phil's show, particularly all the dysfunctional, predominantly male, people, we are amazed at how dead on Dr Phil is at pointing out how cruel and damaging these men are to the women they try to control.  Nearly every disturbed personality trait those men exhibit, described my now ex-husband to a tee.  It is frightening that there are so many men out there like that!  If only I had been 'permitted' to watch a show such as Dr Phil's, so much unbearable unhappiness and misery could have been nipped in the bud, and my children and I could have escaped years earlier than the decade of emotional and verbal abuse, and mind manipulations that we suffered under, plus the aberrant and deviant sexual behaviors I was forced to participate in.  It took nearly two years to escape and finalize a divorce.  Altho the children are all adults now, they were young teens when my then husband succumbed to an older woman's devious brainwashing.  He permitted her to ruin our marriage and family, and ultimately chose her over his wife and children.  He became a very  mean spirited, cruel person, began drinking hard liquor, and demanding impossible standards for the children and I to achieve, ie, we were to be PERFECT, after he'd met her.  He was a miserable excuse for a human being, and because  he was miserable, the Lord knows, we ALL had to be miserable.  Altho I begged for marriage counseling, or any kind of counselor for us, the children, he refused to permit it.  In hindsight, I understand it was probably because his secrets would be exposed by his behavior, and we would have learned how truly disturbed the man is, and we would of course, opted to get as far away, and as fast away from him as we could get.

   Now when we watch the show, and see other women being abused (I understand sometimes men are the victims of abusive women, but predominantly it is the other way around), we just want to reach through the TV screen, shake those women by the shoulders, look them straight in the eye, and firmly tell them, GET AWAY FROM HIM AND DON'T LOOK BACK!!!  Dr Phil, you nail things on the head time and time again; we rarely disagree with anything you advise people.  You confirm that it was best for us all to get out of that house, and to stay away from him as much as possible.  For myself, I have zero contact with the raving lunatic;  my children, all being adults, choose for themselves if they want to have anything to do with him.  

   The only thing I fear for them, is they are living a lot of what they learned, and we all have issues to deal with, some of his nasty traits having worn off on all of us.  It is difficult for them to have fulfilling relationships because of the troubling emotional issues they struggle with ingrained from his abuse.

   I KNOW I'm not perfect either, and I'm sure they have some of my personality traits as well.  But the deception and betrayal was sadly all from his end.  The strain on all of us was, and at times, still is horrendous.

   I also want to comment on one of your books, Dr Phil, that was passed on to  me, only much too late to help, as the marriage was already in separation:  Relationship Rescue.  At the time, the ex was trying to FORCE a reconciliation, under extreme duress on my part, did I try yet again to save the marriage.  I went through your book, and I did every single workshop item, and that one part where there are many questions asked to get an idea of whether or not the relationship is worth rescuing, well the results I came up with were 90% it was over a long time ago, that's how bad it already was.  Him trying to force me to return with threatening innuendos certainly wasn't winning me back with his charm.  Oh, and by the way, he was STILL seeing his mistress.  He wanted the best of both worlds, his respectful wife for public life, and his mistress for his egotistical stroking.  What a sad, sad human.

   Sorry this is a long message, it feels good to finally be able to express a fraction of what we went through, and how helpful, even tho belated, your advice and observations are.  God bless you and Robin, your family, and everyone whose lives you touch!!! 

I could use some dr phil advice too, 'cause my situation is pretty bad too. How many psychos are out  there among men? My husband is an alcoholic and an emotional and verbal abuser. Sometimes he throws things to threaten me. I am so tired of his gaslightning. I am the guilty one of everything, in his mind. I've been called names, being belittled, I am isolated with no car, no friends or family, specially because I am from Spain and I live in the States. In almost 6 years I have been here I haven't found a friend. I don't work because I have no transportation. I have a 3 year old boy with me. I can't ask about anything because he thinks I am trying to interfere, he doesn't want me to call him on the phone to the job just to "say something stupid", I don't have sex since my boy was born. I left everything in my country for him, including my other 3 children there (they're grown ups already). Now he says this marriage is over and he doesn't want to go to counseling either. His solution is: "if you are so unhappy I'll buy you a ticket tomorrow and you go back to your fu****g Spain". I am 44 years old with no house to go there, job or anybody to turn to, but this is so opressive that is making me literally sick, and I am afraid if I don't leave soon,... well I don't know. I am afraid and sorry for my kid too. So, thank you dr. phil for showing to the rest of the world this plague of men abusing women "just because they can". How can we criticize muslims and people like that when in our society women are still a second or third class citizen and men still think they are superior to us?? Double standard?
 
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